Zoe Sugg Truth Revealed

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  • Bio

    Zoe Sugg, more commonly known by her moniker Zoella, is a YouTuber that rose to fame by posting Primark hauls and beauty inspired vlogs. She lives in her Brighton mansion with pug dog Nala, and manchild Alfie Deyes.

    Zoe is managed by Gleam Futures and also set up A to Z creatives with boyfriend Deyes, which manages her 'creative' output and runs her social media pages.

    Abandoned Projects

    • Her blog, which hasn't been updated since 2017, though is apparently being relaunched - watch this space
    • Couch to 5K - begun and then abandoned
    • Her Zoella YouTube channel, which was abandoned without explanation.
    • Her beauty and lifestyle ranges, her contract with SLG who manufactured the products has not been renewed.

    Ads and Freebies #gifted

    • Slugg eyebrows
    • Orange Trump-esque spray tans
    • Pumpkins
    • Cinema Tickets for various films
    • Dumdum donuts for every occasion

    Controversies

    • Girl Online - Zoellas book series Girl Online was a massive bestseller until it was disclosed that she hadn't written a word of it, and the entire thing was ghostwritten.
    • Advent Calendar - the 2018 calendar was slammed worldwide after the £50 12 door calendar was exposed as being rather sparsely filled with cheap tat. The price was slashed by Boots to £25, but it failed to sell and ended up on the Sale shelf before Xmas. She addressed the issue at the end of a vlog in a half arsed attempt to recover from the scandal.
    • Nasty Tweets - old tweets from her Twitter account were dug up amid the calendar controversy and Zoe was exposed as having posted a variety of hateful and bigoted remarks including homophobic, transphobic, fatphobic, classist and poverty shaming content.
    • Cordially Invited - her much hyped lifestyle and hosting book was slammed by reviewers after it transpired that it contained inane advice such as how to make a ham sandwich and how to construct paperchains, alongside advice such as 'wear a coat when going on an autumnal walk' and 'use an umbrella when it rains'... read more pearls of wisdom from Zoe HERE. Zoe also forced her A to Z employees to pre-order the book as well.
    • ColourPop palette - Zoe's collab with the brand was trashed by makeup fans, with many saying it was "as bland and beige as her" and "as dead as her YouTube channel"
    • Undisclosed Ads - Zoella was threatened with legal action by CMA after consistently failing to clearly state which products in her videos were paid advertisements. She continues to feature #gifted items on her Instagram without properly disclosing them in line with advertising regulations.
    • Faking Domestic Violence is one of her favourite games

    Ailments

    • Anxiety - Having a friend like master optical illusion photoshopper aka Tanya Burr can help with managing anxiety.
    • Cold Sores - regularly pop up on Zoe's lips and feature in her videos. As seen here and here.
    • Cankles - Most likely due to water retention as well as lacking a proper diet-- which only consists of takeaways, pizza, mashed potatoes, and all things sugar.
    • Vlog fear - First mentioned in this vlog, Zoe excuses her chronic laziness of not uploading vlogs due to having the "occasional" vlog fear. Expiration date: this crippling condition does have a shelf life and clears up when it is Vlogmas month (December 1-24) or when Zoe has a sponsored video to promote.
    • Third Wheeler - As seen here. This is what happens when you're in a one-sided relationship and your happiest moments are from circa 2014.
    • Ringworm - Apparently the saying "if you like it, put a ring on it" does not hold true for Alfie Deyes. The only ring Alfie has given to his girlfriend is of the ringworm variety, despite being together for 7 years, buying not-mansions together, and co-founding a playground business.
    • Migraines - Apparently, Zoe has a special type of migraine where she can do online shopping on bright computer screens or can still get free pumpkins out in bright daylight. Tattlers believe that Zoe's 'migraines' are due to lack of proper water consumption and a poor diet (also, see cankles above).
    • Hair Extensions - If mangled half long/half short hair is your type of look and you've been inspired by Zoe, then book an appointment with her hair stylist to get Zoe's ratchet extensions or Tanya's fried thinning hair.
    • Imposter Syndrome - Defined as "a complex phenomenon where you doubt your accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud to others". Another ailment that plagues Zoe's delicate sensibilities.
    • Grand Delusions- Zoe often wears triple padded bras not as flotational devices but because she thinks she can fool the public that this is her actual chest size. Before and after.

    In Memoriam

    • Friendship with Louise Pentland - Once bestowed as being the godmother to her chummy's eldest daughter Darcy. The two had a falling out that was never explained. It is estimated to have happened shortly after Hello World.
    • Friendship with Gabriella Lindley - Once upon a time these two appeared on each others vlogs but the friendship clashed and ended. Most likely died due to there being two big egos. Gobbs did a follow up video here saying they are still friendly. 🤥
    • Attempted friendship with Marzia and Felix - Zoe and Alfie tried to befriend these two but it never really took off.
    • Guinea Pigs - Zoe had two guinea pigs named Pippin and Percy. Pippin died from heat exhaustion and Percy died from loneliness as guinea pigs need to have companions to thrive. Zoe neglected the piggies in favour of Nala-- her pug.
    • House Plants - Zoe has an uncanny ability to constantly kill her houseplants. It's one of the many reasons why she visits the garden centre so often. Also to be around her peoples.
    • Alfie Deyes - This is currently pending. Zoe is still waiting for a proposal from Alfie before OR on her 30th birthday. If this doesn't happen there is a likely chance Alfie will meet his maker soon. Watch this space.
    • Friendship with the SacconeJolys - Who would now rather invite Stacey Dooley round for a sleepover than Zoe.

    What did Louise do?

    Six days before Zoe and Alfie announced their baby she posted this:
    16834FF7-FE3B-427D-8EAF-43477BB59CF6.png

    Then after they announced it she posted this:
    EB2C27CE-6300-438D-B5AC-EFD20923862F.png


    Words by Zoe

    Autumnal - Zoe's go-to word for describing all things autumn related. Not an exaggeration.
    Delish - Normally used to describe Zoe's main food group - Pizza.
    Little - Used to describe EVERYTHING.
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