Zoe Sugg #41 Zoe's holding baby like she's caught a cod, Alf cant put away his dad bod!

[coconochanel]

New thread, thanks to @Pheelin24 for title suggestion which originally was' Suggs holding the baby like she's caught a cod and Alfie cant put away his measly dad bod'

Anyway update for newbies...

Zoe uploaded a weird IG clip of her holding Ottie and walking two steps
Zoe has been posting IG stories of Ottie weeing on her and about the smell of her poo
She has been out more this last week then the last 9 months
Alfie has been posting pics everyday mostly including his non ripped body

 

[jvalentine2189]

Zoe only went to all of these birthday outings today to make sure Algae didn't film an upskirt of Dianne. After the accidental footsie and how he got away with that saying he never even noticed I bet he thinks he could get away with the photo.

 

[coconochanel]

Lets see if she posts a pic of her and Ottie now Jim's baby has arrived.

 

[sillybobboo]

I just do not care about the smell of your daughters shite Zoe

 

[Anneliese2199]

No one:
Zoe: “Baby poo doesn’t smell like what I expected it to smell like.”

 

[Yupyupyup]

Class title @Pheelin24 .

I feel in my jellies that there’s a baby ad coming, but oh what will it be?! Will Pay be made to flog her own fathers show-stopping brand???? Or will it be a fashion show of a ridiculously teeeeenny designer outfit that you’ll have to remortgage your house to afford???? Oooooh I’m bursting with excitement for her first day on the job, good luck little one as your horsey father would say

 

[spillthesass]

So I was looking for thank you cards on Moonpig earlier and came across this. They really did sh*t with the name.

 

[Ella-Maja]

Lets see if she posts a pic of her and Ottie now Jim's baby has arrived.

What’s up with the black and white filter on newborns? Is it a UK influencer thing? Also I bet Pay will be featured a lot more now…

 

[boobear191]

I wonder if Nala has been shipped off to big mands yet

 

[QueenBW]

So I was looking for thank you cards on Moonpig earlier and came across this. They really did sh*t with the name.

I've always heard that when choosing a baby name you should think of all the possible abbreviations, spellings, acronyms together with middle name and last name, etc. to check that there isn't much to bully the kid for regarding their name. Sure, something can always come up, but they seemed to try really hard to ruin poor Pay;s name. Rich regret... for a baby that is going to live a millionaire life with two idiots who definitely don't have a clue and who look pretty bloody unhappy in their daily lives. Rich regret for a baby who was probably a way for Alfie to get Zoe off his back with the whole children and marriage thing. And then all the Otter wordplay. Let us hope she doesn't have big teeth or she'll never heard the end of it at school.

 

[Kosher Pig]

Can't believe she's talking about Otties Grotty Botty! Who talks about the smell of baby poo on social media???

 

[anonymousgossip]

Zoe and Dianne might be similar in size but their body composition is no comparison... Dianne has tons of muscle and cardio endurance, Zoe has cankles and can hardly leave the sofa

 

[Chilli pepper 19]

No one:
Zoe: “Baby poo doesn’t smell like what I expected it to smell like.”

No doubt she was expecting it to smell like haribo

 

[xits_jjx]

I've always heard that when choosing a baby name you should think of all the possible abbreviations, spellings, acronyms together with middle name and last name, etc. to check that there isn't much to bully the kid for regarding their name. Sure, something can always come up, but they seemed to try really hard to ruin poor Pay;s name. Rich regret... for a baby that is going to live a millionaire life with two idiots who definitely don't have a clue and who look pretty bloody unhappy in their daily lives. Rich regret for a baby who was probably a way for Alfie to get Zoe off his back with the whole children and marriage thing. And then all the Otter wordplay. Let us hope she doesn't have big teeth or she'll never heard the end of it at school.

Ottie won’t get bullied, and I’ll tell you why: everyone gives their kid stupid names nowadays. Class rooms are going to be filled with kids that have stupid names, it’ll be the norm.
What’s wrong with a simple name like Katie, Mia, Sara or Phoebe?

 

[199666]

I mean Ottilie isnt that bad when you remember the names Zoe shared on insta before wasnt Teeny or Tiny one of them?

 

[fidgetjo]

Ottie won’t get bullied, and I’ll tell you why: everyone gives their kid stupid names nowadays. Class rooms are going to be filled with kids that have stupid names, it’ll be the norm.
What’s wrong with a simple name like Katie, Mia, Sara or Phoebe?

Also ottilie is a common name in middle class groups here in the UK. There’s every possibility she won’t even be the only one in her class called that. Especially if she ends up in a fancy private school.

 

[coconochanel]

I don't like the nickname Ottie its reminds me of otter. Also in yesterdays IG vid when Joe and Dianne were sorting out the paddleboard and Zoe was laughing it wasn't even funny. At least Dianne's strong enough to use a pump unlike ickle weak Zoe. #suchabitch

 

[Idkk]

My two cents, for what they’re worth.

First:
-I don’t mind Zoe. I don’t hate for hate’s sake.
-Not much of an Alfie fan but no real issue with him.

So with that. I can’t stand the name of the baby. It just screams new money Pinterest mum insta aesthetic middle class wank. Apologies if you or your kids have the same name.

Zoe’s motherhood is not what we know as motherhood. She has 890 helping hands and I really don’t think her daily life has changed much at all, except now sometimes when she’s lying around watching movies, she has a little human lying on top of her instead of a dog.

Everything about Zoe and Alfie as parents feels very aesthetic influencer. It doesn’t feel real. There is no reality check for them because they’re not in reality. They had a baby, but that baby right now is an accessory. Obviously I’m not in their house so I don’t know how much they’re actually doing, but look at any other set of parents a week or two postpartum and tell me how much they’re able to do country pub walks and beach days, all perfectly styled and beautifully shot. Do I think new parents should just be exhausted messes by default? No. But it’s the norm, and Zalfie aren’t experiencing it, so I can’t relate.

 

[youalrightmate]

Ottie won’t get bullied, and I’ll tell you why: everyone gives their kid stupid names nowadays. Class rooms are going to be filled with kids that have stupid names, it’ll be the norm.
What’s wrong with a simple name like Katie, Mia, Sara or Phoebe?

As much as I dislike the babies name…. All names were ‘stupid’ once. Can’t remember one Katie or Sarah/Sara I’ve liked either, most of them turned out to be horse chicks.

 

[ambernectar123]

As much as I dislike the babies name…. All names were ‘stupid’ once. Can’t remember one Katie or Sarah/Sara I’ve liked either, most of them turned out to be horse chicks.

In bits at this, because you’re absolutely bang on saying that they’re horse girl names

I dont mind the name ottilie, but it fully makes me cringe hearing Alfie say it as he can’t talk properly. My 4 year godson can enunciate better.