Thanks to @Furmingos for the new title and the great recaps.
"It's fish," is a ringing endorsement of the English fish and chips eaten by Dawn during YITS first trip to London and Paris. As @yanasi said, "Like Planes, Trains and Automobiles but with Two John Candys"
This is going to be long. I'm certainly going to miss some things. I can only recall so much cringe.
No sign of Chris and Mindy or Smoky Mountain Hiker. Instead, we get the promotion of a new character in the YCU (Yankee Cinematic Universe).
Will conned his sister Jamie into traveling with them (and probably paying for half).
For 10 days abroad (actually 8) they each brought a small roll aboard bag and a personal item. I've seen nudists pack more clothes. To be fair, that's more than enough room for the clothes that still fit Will and Dawn.
They wore light jackets to wear to London in winter. Because Tennessee is just like London. Genius.
Jamie sprained her ankle on the first day. Will, being the consummate gentleman, walked ahead of her the whole time vlogging, letting her carry her own bags up six flights of stairs. Sorry, ladies, he's taken.
Will booked three plus-sized people into a minus-sized room on the top floor, obviously the cheapest room in the place. Three child-sized beds and a tiny wet room with a shower/toilet combo and the ability to stink up the entire sixth floor. I'm sure all three enjoyed some amazing wafts of ass. Did I mention the thin and tiny towels?
Their first time in London. The first place they go? McDonald's "for drinks". Apparently, "for drinks" is code for "We're buying food but I'm too embarrassed to admit it." Drinks = breakfast sandwiches with double the pig meat
Will and Dawn mostly ditched Jamie and power waddled through your basic attractions: castles, Harrod's, The London Eye. Will practically cried at Stonehenge. "Julie Garlin" made an appearance at Abbey Road.
They went to Bath, England. Unfortunately, they didn't have time to enjoy the town's famous Roman baths. Not the first time Will has missed a bath, but the first time he was actually sorry about it.
They saw Phantom of the Opera. Before the theater, they ate at The Hard Rock Cafe. If you are keeping score that's two burger places in one day. Will got the - surprise! - nachos. Dawn got a burger and fries. They gave her vinegar for her chips. It's England, afterall. Dawn thought the vinegar was ketchup. Y'know. Because they look so much alike. That's our Dawn.
The next day they went to Burger King. Will says that they missed American food. You mean like the American food you ate yesterday? You couldn't eat two British meals in a row?
Overall, the trip offered no real insight. Just Will reading the usual signs, only this time in England!
For reasons unclear, YITS moved to a new London hotel for one night before heading to Paris. Strange timing. The room was slightly bigger than the first room. You'd think Will booked The Taj Mahal. A rainfall shower! Oooohhhhh. You know that you book some old-ass hotels if you are marveling at a basic shower head that is literally at any hardware store in the world.
Dawn admitted to taking toilet paper from hotel rooms. You know who does that? Cheap assholes.
Will claims that they were going to spend two days in Paris, but the train strike forced them to leave early. His plan for Paris made no sense. There's no way they could do the Opera House, Paris Disneyland and the Eurostar in one day. There's not enough time.I think Will lied to get out of paying $$$$ for Paris Disneyland, which Will called "Euro Disney". It hasn't been called that for over 20 years. If you were actually going, you would know the fucking name. Sorry, Dawn. You were never going to Disneyland. That's our Will.
Will and Dawn went to the Louvre. Will, who is a good Christian and his totally religious, didn't recognize the famous painting of John the Baptist or, as Will calls him, John Baptist. I was today years old when I learned that "Baptist" is actually John's last name. My name is Baptist, John Baptist.
When they finally made it to the Mona Lisa, Dawn must have been standing in the way because people pushed her. Yay, Paris!
On the way to Notre Dame, Will did a very cringe hunchback impression. He claims that he didn't know that Dawn was filling. Except for the fact that he was the person who - y'know - handed Dawn his camera.
They tried to go to Jim Morrison's grave but were too late. You can take the boy out of Tennessee but you can't make him understand operating hours.
You'd think that with all of the new culture and experiences, would come new enlightenment for Will and Dawn. You'd be wrong.
When asked about her trip Dawn said, "There were a lot of stairs."
When asked about the best thing he ate on the trip, Will said, "Probably the lunch we had as part of our tour." Because tours are famous for spending so much time and money on the lunch they make you wolf down in 15 minutes before they throw you back to the bus.
London: Come for Big Ben. Stay for the bus food!
Of course, there were many meals that they didn't film. Translation: "We ate lunch and dinner at McDonald's, too." They also had pizza "with an English flair.". Translation: "There was a Domino's Pizza around the corner from our hotel." They also had Burger King and Chinese food. What are two of Dawn's least favorite foods? Oh, yeah. Burger King and Chinese food. That's our Will!
So after seeing all of these famous, historical locations, Dawn proceeds to laugh for 20 minutes because apparently someone on the plane farted. Actually, Dawn, because your husband is so cheap, you were sitting right by the lavatories on the plane. You weren't smelling one person on the plane. You were smelling everyone on the plane. You're welcome. She's going to laugh for three hours now.
Dawn bought two souvenirs: two reusable shopping bags which she proceeded to model during a livestream. She put a bag over each shoulder and walked like a runway model on the catwalk. On the catwalk. Yeah, she shook her big tush on the catwalk. Neither Will nor Dawn are aware that reusable shopping bags have been a thing for at least a decade. I guess you don't see them when you spend all of your time in fast food drive thrus.
Will must have gotten blow back from his ultra patriotic stans. His latest video is filled with more Americana than a Ford Truck commercial. He mentions London and Paris and how much he loves America. They also ate KFC Double Downs because people asked for it. The same people who asked for superchats: Will and Dawn. The video is super lazy. 25 minutes of nothing.
Now that Will is back, he's planning more international trips: Japan, Australia, Ireland, Egypt and Israel are countries that Will has heard of and can list.
YITS going to Israel must be in The Bible as part of the end times.
Can you imagine Will and his red swim shirt on the French Riviera? Or Dawn waddling around Monaco in her best toilet paper tshirt?
Will talks of going to Japan and then Australia, so, even though he's heard of these countries, he's obviously not quite sure where they are located.
Will is bored of The Smokies. He doesn't want to wait around for the next Buc-ee's or Dollywood's Big Bear Mountain. How upset must Will be if a new Buc-ee's doesn't make him happy? I'm not sure I want to live in a world where Will doesn't obsess over Buc-ee's.
That's okay because Ryan from AIOT is absolutely owning the Smokies lately. He's not doing anything amazing, just a little planning and effort. I hear that he actually showers every day and goes to church. Whoa.
I think, gentle reader, that we are entering a new phase for Yankee in the South. Will moved to a tourist town looking for a fabulous life of mini-golf and Ogle Dogs. Instead of fulfillment, he's found a hole in his soul that can't be filled with ribeye steaks and Mountain Lightning. He's going to try and travel, all the while AIOT will become the authority on The Smoky Mountains.
Will can talk with some expertise about The Great Smoky Mountains. The problem is that Will just isn't bright and doesn't work hard enough to talk intelligently about any other location. His travel videos are boring and basic. They only offer value to hate-watchers and spell-checkers.
Let's face it: Will is bored. A bored Will is an even lazier Will. He's going to find that other exotic locales are going to become as routine as The Smokies are to him today. The problem isn't with The Smokies, it's with Will. Are we going to see some introspection and personal growth? Doubtful.
As we head into April, there's a big date on the calendar: Dawn's 50th birthday.
With the Bank of Chris and Mindy closed, is Will actually going to plan and pay for a special memory for his wife? It would seem that the 'Will Way' is for him to say that the London and Paris trip was her birthday present and call it good. Will just doesn't care enough to want to put in the effort.
If Dawn's 50th birthday is like a night at The Outback Steakhouse, will she get the ribeye steak or the sad meat loaf with the ugly gravy?
"It's fish," is a ringing endorsement of the English fish and chips eaten by Dawn during YITS first trip to London and Paris. As @yanasi said, "Like Planes, Trains and Automobiles but with Two John Candys"
This is going to be long. I'm certainly going to miss some things. I can only recall so much cringe.
No sign of Chris and Mindy or Smoky Mountain Hiker. Instead, we get the promotion of a new character in the YCU (Yankee Cinematic Universe).
Will conned his sister Jamie into traveling with them (and probably paying for half).
For 10 days abroad (actually 8) they each brought a small roll aboard bag and a personal item. I've seen nudists pack more clothes. To be fair, that's more than enough room for the clothes that still fit Will and Dawn.
They wore light jackets to wear to London in winter. Because Tennessee is just like London. Genius.
Jamie sprained her ankle on the first day. Will, being the consummate gentleman, walked ahead of her the whole time vlogging, letting her carry her own bags up six flights of stairs. Sorry, ladies, he's taken.
Will booked three plus-sized people into a minus-sized room on the top floor, obviously the cheapest room in the place. Three child-sized beds and a tiny wet room with a shower/toilet combo and the ability to stink up the entire sixth floor. I'm sure all three enjoyed some amazing wafts of ass. Did I mention the thin and tiny towels?
Their first time in London. The first place they go? McDonald's "for drinks". Apparently, "for drinks" is code for "We're buying food but I'm too embarrassed to admit it." Drinks = breakfast sandwiches with double the pig meat
Will and Dawn mostly ditched Jamie and power waddled through your basic attractions: castles, Harrod's, The London Eye. Will practically cried at Stonehenge. "Julie Garlin" made an appearance at Abbey Road.
They went to Bath, England. Unfortunately, they didn't have time to enjoy the town's famous Roman baths. Not the first time Will has missed a bath, but the first time he was actually sorry about it.
They saw Phantom of the Opera. Before the theater, they ate at The Hard Rock Cafe. If you are keeping score that's two burger places in one day. Will got the - surprise! - nachos. Dawn got a burger and fries. They gave her vinegar for her chips. It's England, afterall. Dawn thought the vinegar was ketchup. Y'know. Because they look so much alike. That's our Dawn.
The next day they went to Burger King. Will says that they missed American food. You mean like the American food you ate yesterday? You couldn't eat two British meals in a row?
Overall, the trip offered no real insight. Just Will reading the usual signs, only this time in England!
For reasons unclear, YITS moved to a new London hotel for one night before heading to Paris. Strange timing. The room was slightly bigger than the first room. You'd think Will booked The Taj Mahal. A rainfall shower! Oooohhhhh. You know that you book some old-ass hotels if you are marveling at a basic shower head that is literally at any hardware store in the world.
Dawn admitted to taking toilet paper from hotel rooms. You know who does that? Cheap assholes.
Will claims that they were going to spend two days in Paris, but the train strike forced them to leave early. His plan for Paris made no sense. There's no way they could do the Opera House, Paris Disneyland and the Eurostar in one day. There's not enough time.I think Will lied to get out of paying $$$$ for Paris Disneyland, which Will called "Euro Disney". It hasn't been called that for over 20 years. If you were actually going, you would know the fucking name. Sorry, Dawn. You were never going to Disneyland. That's our Will.
Will and Dawn went to the Louvre. Will, who is a good Christian and his totally religious, didn't recognize the famous painting of John the Baptist or, as Will calls him, John Baptist. I was today years old when I learned that "Baptist" is actually John's last name. My name is Baptist, John Baptist.
When they finally made it to the Mona Lisa, Dawn must have been standing in the way because people pushed her. Yay, Paris!
On the way to Notre Dame, Will did a very cringe hunchback impression. He claims that he didn't know that Dawn was filling. Except for the fact that he was the person who - y'know - handed Dawn his camera.
They tried to go to Jim Morrison's grave but were too late. You can take the boy out of Tennessee but you can't make him understand operating hours.
You'd think that with all of the new culture and experiences, would come new enlightenment for Will and Dawn. You'd be wrong.
When asked about her trip Dawn said, "There were a lot of stairs."
When asked about the best thing he ate on the trip, Will said, "Probably the lunch we had as part of our tour." Because tours are famous for spending so much time and money on the lunch they make you wolf down in 15 minutes before they throw you back to the bus.
London: Come for Big Ben. Stay for the bus food!
Of course, there were many meals that they didn't film. Translation: "We ate lunch and dinner at McDonald's, too." They also had pizza "with an English flair.". Translation: "There was a Domino's Pizza around the corner from our hotel." They also had Burger King and Chinese food. What are two of Dawn's least favorite foods? Oh, yeah. Burger King and Chinese food. That's our Will!
So after seeing all of these famous, historical locations, Dawn proceeds to laugh for 20 minutes because apparently someone on the plane farted. Actually, Dawn, because your husband is so cheap, you were sitting right by the lavatories on the plane. You weren't smelling one person on the plane. You were smelling everyone on the plane. You're welcome. She's going to laugh for three hours now.
Dawn bought two souvenirs: two reusable shopping bags which she proceeded to model during a livestream. She put a bag over each shoulder and walked like a runway model on the catwalk. On the catwalk. Yeah, she shook her big tush on the catwalk. Neither Will nor Dawn are aware that reusable shopping bags have been a thing for at least a decade. I guess you don't see them when you spend all of your time in fast food drive thrus.
Will must have gotten blow back from his ultra patriotic stans. His latest video is filled with more Americana than a Ford Truck commercial. He mentions London and Paris and how much he loves America. They also ate KFC Double Downs because people asked for it. The same people who asked for superchats: Will and Dawn. The video is super lazy. 25 minutes of nothing.
Now that Will is back, he's planning more international trips: Japan, Australia, Ireland, Egypt and Israel are countries that Will has heard of and can list.
YITS going to Israel must be in The Bible as part of the end times.
Can you imagine Will and his red swim shirt on the French Riviera? Or Dawn waddling around Monaco in her best toilet paper tshirt?
Will talks of going to Japan and then Australia, so, even though he's heard of these countries, he's obviously not quite sure where they are located.
Will is bored of The Smokies. He doesn't want to wait around for the next Buc-ee's or Dollywood's Big Bear Mountain. How upset must Will be if a new Buc-ee's doesn't make him happy? I'm not sure I want to live in a world where Will doesn't obsess over Buc-ee's.
That's okay because Ryan from AIOT is absolutely owning the Smokies lately. He's not doing anything amazing, just a little planning and effort. I hear that he actually showers every day and goes to church. Whoa.
I think, gentle reader, that we are entering a new phase for Yankee in the South. Will moved to a tourist town looking for a fabulous life of mini-golf and Ogle Dogs. Instead of fulfillment, he's found a hole in his soul that can't be filled with ribeye steaks and Mountain Lightning. He's going to try and travel, all the while AIOT will become the authority on The Smoky Mountains.
Will can talk with some expertise about The Great Smoky Mountains. The problem is that Will just isn't bright and doesn't work hard enough to talk intelligently about any other location. His travel videos are boring and basic. They only offer value to hate-watchers and spell-checkers.
Let's face it: Will is bored. A bored Will is an even lazier Will. He's going to find that other exotic locales are going to become as routine as The Smokies are to him today. The problem isn't with The Smokies, it's with Will. Are we going to see some introspection and personal growth? Doubtful.
As we head into April, there's a big date on the calendar: Dawn's 50th birthday.
With the Bank of Chris and Mindy closed, is Will actually going to plan and pay for a special memory for his wife? It would seem that the 'Will Way' is for him to say that the London and Paris trip was her birthday present and call it good. Will just doesn't care enough to want to put in the effort.
If Dawn's 50th birthday is like a night at The Outback Steakhouse, will she get the ribeye steak or the sad meat loaf with the ugly gravy?