I’d like to go on a night out with youI’m glad this is anonymous
I drew a giant cock on the toilet wall at a friends wedding. No idea why
the venue then charged my friend for the graffiti. He asked around us all to see if we knew anything?? It was put down to one of the teens that attended after a few too many WKD’s....
I also once went to see a comedian.. whilst he was doing his act, I got up, and was immediately heckled asking where I was going to which I replied “off to the toilet before the comedian comes on” yes I thought I was hilariousthen proceeded to flash him my tits Again no idea why
Probably my worst one (that could have resulted in trouble) was on a night out with friends and my brother I couldn’t find my bag and decided this huge muscley guy had nicked it. My brother then went and confronted him and started shouting the odds asking for my bag back and that he knew he had it etc etc....
Turns out I’d left it in the loo, and my friend brought it back for me. My brother was lucky he didn’t get knocked out.
Haha!! Bet your liver wouldn’t thank youI’d like to go on a night out with you
That is an amazing come back to a comedyI’m glad this is anonymous
I drew a giant cock on the toilet wall at a friends wedding. No idea why
the venue then charged my friend for the graffiti. He asked around us all to see if we knew anything?? It was put down to one of the teens that attended after a few too many WKD’s....
I also once went to see a comedian.. whilst he was doing his act, I got up, and was immediately heckled asking where I was going to which I replied “off to the toilet before the comedian comes on” yes I thought I was hilariousthen proceeded to flash him my tits Again no idea why
Probably my worst one (that could have resulted in trouble) was on a night out with friends and my brother I couldn’t find my bag and decided this huge muscley guy had nicked it. My brother then went and confronted him and started shouting the odds asking for my bag back and that he knew he had it etc etc....
Turns out I’d left it in the loo, and my friend brought it back for me. My brother was lucky he didn’t get knocked out.
That is an amazing come back to a comedy
I’ve got worse as I got olderHaha!! Bet your liver wouldn’t thank you
God I’ve been a dick at times whilst pissedI’ve calmed down (a bit) in my old age fortunately!
That fire alarm must have had a serious amount of baseWhen I was a teenager I was on holiday with family, went swimming in the sea, got out and had the worst headache which was getting worse and worse by the minute. Everyone including strangers on the beach were really concerned for me, laying me down, covering me up, fanning me and giving me water thinking I had sun stroke or something. Ended up being taken to hospital and when I was waiting to see a doctor I put my hand on my forehead and realised this whole ordeal was cos my goggles were on too tight round my head
Also was in a club once completely off my tits. Everyones running off for some reason and my mates are trying to pull me off the dancefloor and I'm like "naaaaaah leave me alone this tunes about to drop any sec"
Turns out there was a bomb scare and I'd been dancing to the fire alarm for a good few mins
Parents evening must have been fun after that...Quite a lot of years ago when my kids were still in primary school me and a friend decided to go on a night out (her kids were at the same primary school as mine)
We got very bloody drunk and were dancing away when we noticed a load of teachers from our kids school in the same place on a staff night out.
For some reason in our drunken state we thought it would be a great idea to gate crash their night out and join in with their dancing on the dance floor., we were so loud and bold and throwing all sorts of dance moves that I think the teachers felt like they couldnt ask us to leave them alone!!
This happened 13 yrs ago but I still break out in a cold sweat when I think of what complete and utter idiots we were that night...thankfully the teachers never bought up to our faces but God knows what they said behind our backs
Ed Miliband...Dominic Raab....I am sensing some kind of pattern here....Where do I start...me and my gay best mate went on a last minute night out, I had a fair few vodkas at home before I left for the club and by the time I got there, I was already smashed and it wasn't even midnight. It was only a small club and it wasn't very busy at the time. I noticed a guy standing on his own and convinced myself he looked just like Ed Miliband. I went around telling strangers in the club that Ed Miliband was here and then I went upto the lookalike, told him who he looked like and asked him to come back to mineHe was actually very sweet and said he would rather go on a date with me and we swapped numbers. 5 minutes later my friend took me home in a taxi cos I was too drunk to function. That night I also asked a guy with a naturally high voice if he had been sucking on helium
Another night I got so drunk with my mate, that we got a taxi back to these guys house which was half an hour away. The embarrassing moment happened when I was very much hungover - I woke up about 8am next to this guy on the floor and was horrified. I didn't wanna wake my mate up but I had work in a few hours. I had no idea where I was so I grabbed my bag and crept out the house and just started walking until I found a main road and a shop. I found a cash point in the shop and got £50 out for a taxi, found a taxi company on google and ordered one. 10 minutes later I saw a silver car pull up outside the shop so I walked over, opened the back door and started getting into the car until the driver turned around all confused and said "oh sorry love I'm not a taxi" - I'd got into some random blokes car and I was absolutely mortified! I went and hid behind the postbox for a good 5 minutes
You must be fairly local to where I am.... I believe we are the only area that use the word tipple tail!On a Work night out I somehow got so drunk I danced on tables, did tipple tales down the street and near broke my back, karaoke, fell down many sets of stairs, ran away from everyone and locked myself in the toilet when they said I should go home and contacted my fiance to collect me and laid in a homeless man’s dog basket with his dog as he busked and sang along to the dog. I was ill for about a week after this
Oh shit I’ve been rumbledEd Miliband...Dominic Raab....I am sensing some kind of pattern here....
I’m north east hahaYou must be fairly local to where I am.... I believe we are the only area that use the word tipple tail!
Jesus ChristWhen I was a teenager I was on holiday with family, went swimming in the sea, got out and had the worst headache which was getting worse and worse by the minute. Everyone including strangers on the beach were really concerned for me, laying me down, covering me up, fanning me and giving me water thinking I had sun stroke or something. Ended up being taken to hospital and when I was waiting to see a doctor I put my hand on my forehead and realised this whole ordeal was cos my goggles were on too tight round my head
Also was in a club once completely off my tits. Everyones running off for some reason and my mates are trying to pull me off the dancefloor and I'm like "naaaaaah leave me alone this tunes about to drop any sec"
Turns out there was a bomb scare and I'd been dancing to the fire alarm for a good few mins
That last line made me lolI once got really drunk during pre-drinks at my friends before going to London for her birthday. Whilst in the mini bus at Oxford Circus I decided I wanted to go home so got out and staggered over to the train station. Then whilst on the underground, I threw up all over myself and just stood there apologising to everyone. Got on the train back to where I live and was looked after by a bunch of middle aged men. I also got off a few stops early as I’d had enough and waited for my dad and brother to pick me up.
Where I use to work they had a summer and Christmas party with open bar. My first one I got really drunk and once again, threw up on the coach home. Although later found out, someone else had done a shit in someone’s front garden!
Did anything develop with the Ed Miliband lookalike though?Where do I start...me and my gay best mate went on a last minute night out, I had a fair few vodkas at home before I left for the club and by the time I got there, I was already smashed and it wasn't even midnight. It was only a small club and it wasn't very busy at the time. I noticed a guy standing on his own and convinced myself he looked just like Ed Miliband. I went around telling strangers in the club that Ed Miliband was here and then I went upto the lookalike, told him who he looked like and asked him to come back to mineHe was actually very sweet and said he would rather go on a date with me and we swapped numbers. 5 minutes later my friend took me home in a taxi cos I was too drunk to function. That night I also asked a guy with a naturally high voice if he had been sucking on helium
Another night I got so drunk with my mate, that we got a taxi back to these guys house which was half an hour away. The embarrassing moment happened when I was very much hungover - I woke up about 8am next to this guy on the floor and was horrified. I didn't wanna wake my mate up but I had work in a few hours. I had no idea where I was so I grabbed my bag and crept out the house and just started walking until I found a main road and a shop. I found a cash point in the shop and got £50 out for a taxi, found a taxi company on google and ordered one. 10 minutes later I saw a silver car pull up outside the shop so I walked over, opened the back door and started getting into the car until the driver turned around all confused and said "oh sorry love I'm not a taxi" - I'd got into some random blokes car and I was absolutely mortified! I went and hid behind the postbox for a good 5 minutes
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