Toddler advice thread

[strawberrysunshine_x]

I know this is going to sound really awful but I don't want to start a slippery slope of her needing me there? I guess I just worry that once I start that, it will never stop, and she'll not settle for her grandparents etc (because they definitely would not be willing to sit with her for half an hour or whatever..) She may have changed but in the past us being there just made her act silly, blowing raspberries and poking our faces etc. But I'm so desperate, I'll try anything!



Thanks, this was my thinking but on the occasions I have tried an early bed, it still takes til nearly 8 to fall asleep.

This was today's schedule:

Wake at approx 7.20am (she stirred about 5.30 but must have gone back off with no trouble as I didn't hear any more)
Nap at 12.45 - 2pm
Bath at 5.45 after dinner
CBeebies until 6.30pm
Upstairs for teeth brushing, pyjamas and a story.
Now it's at this point she starts to run around like a loon, full of energy and hyper.
Calm her down, maybe have another story, bed at 6.50pm

Because of my social anxiety I don't take her out to soft play or any playgroups or anything, so the most exercise she gets is playing in the garden, so I'm wondering if this is all my fault? She's not been to childcare in almost two weeks as her minder is on holiday, but she spent lots of time playing with her cousins over half term.

She's still awake now

Can you try taking her to the park before tea time? Will she fall sleep on the way back if you drive there ?
I would try taking her up to bed even earlier. Like 6pm!?
Tonight mine went to sleep at 645. I took him up at 615. He was really tired tho he’s been up since 7am and we went to the park this morning and he’s been in the garden and danced to little baby bum. He moans quite a bit between 4-6 pm but it’s manageable. Definitely try taking her up even earlier. I don’t have any other suggestions . I lie with mine to get to sleep but he’s more relaxed that way and I don’t mind doing it. Whatever works for you
ETA can you get her to stop running round before bed ? As she’s probably hyped up?

 

[PillowsofFluff]

From memory I think my little girl was about 5 months when she went into her own room. She was such a noisy sleeper it kept me awake so we moved her early and touch wood, barring illness, she's been fine since

Well I say fine. Sleep is a nightmare at the moment. She sleeps through but getting her off is awful and she wakes at the crack of dawn

 

[SwizzleMalarkey]

Have you tried to make him use sentences at home? For example, if he wants a drink - instead of him just saying “drink” or “juice” or whatever word he uses, stop him and say “can you ask me for your juice properly? Say, please May I have some juice?” And don’t give him the juice until he attempts to say the sentence. That might sound a bit mean but we found particularly with our youngest there was a lot of pointing to things or using single words a lot so we had to spend time really coaxing the sentences out!!!!

I will definitely give this a go and see how we get on. I predict he will find it annoying at first but I’ll persevere as it’s for his own good!

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Thank you, he FaceTimed me and she was in a right mood, just fake whiny crying so I calmed her down and then his nan and mum went round and she seemed in a better mood. Probs sick of his shit just like I am Anyway I can enjoy my day now I know she’s ok. All she was saying was momma I knew she would snap out of it eventually x

They’re always worse for us mums don’t you think? always a lot more softer and know how to pull on the heartstrings. But I say To my partner our son can’t have me all the time as I’m not here 24/7 we are allowed to have lives she’ll be fine I’m sure

 

[Snippysnips]

Aw fab!!!! Glad you found something to help!!

Thank you

Wow, thanks guys I thought I would be waiting ages for responses!

To answer a few q's:

It's not the flavour I don't think (though she doesn't like it) because as soon as she saw the syringe before even tasting any she just clammed up and went rigid. But yes, I tasted some myself and it is gross so that obviously doesn't help!
I think come Monday I will def ring the GP and ask if anything else (suppository or otherwise) is available, and explain how much trouble we're having. I just hate that this has happened on a weekend and nowhere is open on a Sunday!
Her temp is basically back to normal now, yesterday was the worst, but this morning she was back to 36.5 or something (may have been 37, I just remember the thermometer only beeped once to indicate it was normal)
Obviously I will keep an eye on it though.

Ugh I just hate seeing her miserable

Hoping your little one feels better soon, am still a new aunt an it's definitely not easy seeing them miserable, hope you get it sorted

 

[Dollenganger]

Soz in advance for the mumsnet length of this question and the answer is probably really obvious but we are STRUGGLING with our 2 year old and bed time. He could be the most tired human on earth and he’ll still piss around for hours before going to sleep (Mr Sailor has cooked us a lovely romantic meal tonight and we ended up eating at 9:30 because he took so long to settle despite getting him bathed etc and in bed by 7:30)!

We have cut back his nap to 1-1.5 hours ending at 3pm and no later, he has to have a nap otherwise his night time sleep is atrocious and his day time attitude is ratty as hell from about 1pm onwards. He has no screens easily from about 4pm, tbh probably earlier if any at all if we’re out all day. No sugary snacks/anything that I’d say would make him hyperactive, especially in the evening. We attempt to wear him out as much as possible with a couple of hours of fresh air at least in the day, keeping him stimulated etc. It’s not even a case of him going to bed too early, he usually wakes for the day anytime from 7 onwards and he is usually “knackered” by 6 so we start bedtime then.

Our routine is:
5pm - dinner
6pm - up to bed, bit of playtime while I get everything sorted for bed, bath, book, listen to a short audiobook in bed, then bedtime meditation/mindfulness on the yoto box, then lights out and sleep time

My eldest goes to bed beautifully but my 2yo is just standing up, throwing his duvet covers off, trying to get out of bed, jumping up and down trying to wake his brother up etc etc. HEEEEELP! We’ve just had a baby so sorting him one handed his tricky as. Any advice pls help

Is this just a recent thing? If so, he might be practising a skill or skills and his brain is telling him he needs to be awake to keep practicing.

I find that sometimes putting a child on a swing can help them wind down a little bit better than a walk.

 

[anon0503]

How old is your daughter and what things are you noticing that is making you think she may be on the spectrum?

She’s 19 months old, I’m noticing things like head shaking, wanting to be upside down looking through her legs, playing with the wheels of a toy, she eats most foods in a certain way, (will eat meat first, then sides or whatever, will not mix the two) yesterday I noticed she started walking in circles, she has a speech delay (she babbles a lot but hasn’t said any words yet) and has an aversion to messy play (will touch things if I put them on her hand or put her hand into it but I can’t say she enjoys it?) she used to flap her hands but I can’t say I’ve seen her do that recently but I’m going to watch out for it today, it may well be that she’s still doing it and I’ve overlooked it.

 

[Definitelyme]

@Sailorontheseasea different idea…. Is he over tired? You said he’s exhausted by 6pm, is he maybe over tired and then struggling to wind down?
My kids have all napped until at least 3, so I would definitely keep the nap, maybe play with timings, but I would also try and see if a quieter afternoon means he’s less over tired and may settle more easily.

 

[Definitelyme]

Does anyone have any good toddler recipe books to recommend? I pull out my hair regularly at how little interested in food my little girl is and i struggle to know what to give her. I’m running low on ideas of things she will actually eat!!!

A girl a follow on Instagram has a book out, the Instagram is Zayne’s plate, so you can probably find it on there. I don’t have it, but sometimes make the recipes she posts on Instagram and they are always good.

 

[watermelon sugar]

Me and my boyfriend are taking my son to the air show this weekend, not super close just a bit close so he can see the airplanes, he loves airplanes but wanted to get some headphones for him in case it’s a bit loud for him, is there any anyone would recommend? Thanks in advance!!

 

[Ss1471]

Totally have this problem with my little boy. We co-slept until he was nearly two (I know ) and he would self-settle himself to sleep in our room no problem at all. As soon as we moved him into room about 5 months ago he needs us there until he falls asleep and he will wake in the middle of the night and come in with us again. It’s a viscious cycle!

Ah bloody hell this is terrifying he does sleep so well when he’s settled so maybe it’s just a phase? Such a minefield I just want to make sure he’s not going to sleep feeling sad or frightened!

 

[BettyCrockerr]

Curious on other children's speech.
My 4 year old has been talking from quite an early age.
However. She struggles to pronounce words.
I can't remember at all with my son if it was normal or not.
But I feel like I see other 4 year olds and their pronunciation is quite clear.
We often struggle to understand what she's saying.
I can understand her more but others have a hard time understanding her sometimes.

Just listening to her now say odd words and just picking some.. "Fwush" instead of flush.
"Drong" instead of Strong.
"Cwap" for Clap.
"Toiwet" for toilet
"Pway" for play

It seems to be S's and L's she struggles with.

Just wondering if it's normal or not

Did she have tounge tie? She may have a lisp or slight speech impediment. She’s only little, try to help correct her and see if she can start trying a few words with the proper pronunciation. If she gets one or two correctly, it’s probably just a habit that she will grow out of.

 

[Definitelyme]

Anyone got any tips on hitting? My daughter 2 years + 3 months keeps hitting me. She only does it as in like a playing sense but sometimes it really hurts and I tell her she’s hurting mummy and we use nice hands / kind hands! I’m fed up of it

My sister has a books called "hands are not for hitting". It’s not something we have had much experience with but we usually say similar, and then second time it happens I would say "I am not going to let you hit me, if it happens again I am going to leave the room/stop playing", and then if it happens again I simply walk away without a word. If it’s very bad I would just do the "I won’t let you it me" and then second time just walk away.

 

[Jellybean093]

Yeah, I intend to keep it set to certain times anyway.

Curious about it needed WiFi though as she likes to watch Netflix in the car on long journeys

You should be able to download. I’ll check tomorrow for you. Remind me if I don’t reply

 

[al255]

Will she go to bed earlier? Maybe 11.30/12?

Not at all, I tried it today and it’s pretty much 6 hours of her being awake she will fall asleep for naptime. 12:30-1 fits in with nursery schedule too. Bloody kids and naps

She has lunch at 11:30am then naptime is 12:30, it’s been like this for a good year generally but just bedtime is a nightmare

 

[teddy19]

Anyone on here get the 30 hours free childcare and send their child 3 days a week all year round? Just wanting an idea of monthly cost ahead of my little boy getting his funding in Jan

I think it works out he’d be doing 31.5 hours a week, 51 weeks a year

Ive read the 30 hours a week get you 1140 hours over the year, so we would be 466.50 hours a year over, how do I work out the cost of that?

For reference our nursery is £54.50 a day

 

[al255]

Nappies/pull ups/spare pants/baby wipes/nappy bags/spare set of clothes/snack/juice/drinks.

Take calpol with you if you think you may need it, dress your little one in comfy clothes - leggings/joggers etc, tshirt/jumper - layers so you can add or take away depending on weather. Take a rain jacket or puddle suit & wellies if rain is anywhere forecast!!! And have a few back up dry pairs of trainers/boots in the car incase feet get wet (and spare socks too!)

This is good!! You can leave most of it in your car too x

 

[esoes]

Any tips for getting a 4yo to poop?
She says she doesn't need to go.
But up until Saturday, it had been 6 days. I gave her orange juice Saturday morning and she did a tinyyyyy one. And now she hasn't been again since then.
Even after giving her more orange juice.
I tried some prune juice and she gaged and almost threw up

I find pears really help (and kiwis) - if you could puree some and then freeze it into a lolly for her maybe? And maybe a warm-ish bath to try and relax her wee bum! Is it worth asking the doc about a laxative? My friend's wee girl was the same but she was holding it in which was then resulting in accidents and the doc said it was actually a sign of constipation so she's on laxatives for a few months now.

 

[Jellybean093]

Has everybody had a 2 year review for their toddlers?

We saw our health visitor a grand total of once during lockdown and never had any interaction since. Just been invited for a 2 year review but I’m at work and I can’t be bothered waiting in on my day off for them to be honest as it’s our day together and we go out and do fun things so I’m going to cancel it. Am I actually missing anything? I have no concerns about my little one

Mine was on my due date in December. He was 2 in the September. To be honest, it was such a waste of time. It was so much better with my daughter (12) and my son (6) I was looking forward to it, and showing the HV what he could do, but she didn’t really do much. Asked me a couple of questions, I told her he was under review for his ears, she didn’t mention speech therapy, and we were out after not even 10 minutes

 

[Sailorontheseasea]

Any advice for weaning off the dummy my little boy is 2 next month and I really want it gone. He’s obsessed like he has a dummy then holds another dummy. He only has it at naptime or when he sleeps though, but he has to lie there holding them both. Sometimes if he is really badly teething or not well I’ll let him have a dummy if he is really upset but he doesn’t really have it when he’s awake! Thank you!

We bargained a paw patrol transporter for the dummies. 2 nights of loooots of whinging before bed and that was that, I think he was like 2y2m or something. I was so impressed! We’ve just had to do the same for my 2 year old bottle addict who chewed through his last teat (no I am not spending £6 per 2 MAM bottle teats) and he’s adapted so much quicker than I thought he would and there wasn’t even any bargaining needed. Sometimes they deffo surprise you!