Toddler advice thread #5

[Octopies]

I know this is a very niche question but has anyone had to deal with having a naughty pet around a toddler? (We have a cat that is very bitey!!). Not sure what the hell to do!

Our cat can be a bit snappy when being annoyed by 2.5 year old… which is fair enough!
I’ve taught her how to stroke him nicely and I’ve told her to leave him alone when I can tell he’s peeved. I will quite often say ‘don’t touch him now’ or ‘he wants to be left alone’. I don’t want her to be scared of him but if I’m honest a few nips have taught her to keep a distance. He’s a silly fluffy pedigree thing though rather than a moggy so he is very tolerant and sticks around even when she’s trying to ride him our normal moggy stays well away from her

 

[~*~Jess~*~]

Toddler has brought home another disease for us so I’m currently awake feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus after being woken by a wailing cat at the window. She wails to go out and wails to come in. How nice for her to be able to go downstairs and sleep on the settee now whilst I feel too sick to go back to sleep

I can’t take anymore sickness

Rant over

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

Just found this thread & thought I'd look for opinions.
My three year old started her free hours at nursery three weeks ago, she's doing five afternoons. At the time we applied she seemed to be dropping her nap (depending when she got up) & I was pregnant with our second so thought afternoons would be easier to manage. However she started napping regularly again, doesn't seem to matter what time she gets up & often seems to have a "crash' of energy at points during the day. She's also had terrible hayfever this year. Everytime we pick her up from nursery they say "she was tired again today, was a bit emotional, there were a few tears", nothing positive. Her dad picked her up yesterday & he said he felt interrogated about her tiredness (she was up early & had a nap in the morning but still said she was tired)& they kept asking if we gave her piriton that morning, we told them we give her piriton if her hayfever was bad but that's usually before her bed when it's worse. Her dad dropped her off this afternoon & said she might need to sleep, she was up at 7 but was in good spirits most the morning & the teacher just gave a chuckle. A few hours later we get a phone call saying she was coughing, her nose was running & she said she wasn't feeling well. OH went & got her & she came bounding in, perky as anything. Her dad then told me that the teacher said "oh you seem better now. You must just be tired & finding it all a bit overwhelming." She had asked to go to the quiet room for a sleep but there wasn't anyone to sit with her." This has really upset & angered me a bit that she couldn't have a sleep, am I being dramatic? I understand she was coughing & had a runny nose but what toddler doesn't. She had a sleep when she got home had a few coughs but nothing major, then her nose started running but once that cleared she was fine, it was her allergies, I actually think it's something at nursery she is allergic to.
I'm dropping her off tomorrow & I don't know if I should say something, I don't do confrontation but I feel likes she's an inconvenience to them but she surely isn't the only one that gets tired especially since they have ones in all day. We're already picking her up earlier than we want cos she's finding it a struggle to last longer than three hours. She had never been to nursery before,she was looked after at home & even at her stay & plays she went to she would be shattered after. We say for every hour of play she needs half an hour lounge to recover.
I feel a bit silly but I'm going to phone the health visitor to see if they think her tiredness is unusual for her age, I keep winding myself up that there might be something medically wrong with her like low iron or something. I'm also thinking seeing about changing her to the morning sessions but I know they are usually busier (which i think might overwhelm her) & might not have space & to be honest I still think she will get tired & moany at points. She is such a wee character I hate to think the staff are just seeing this whingy, tired child. Sorry for the ramble, I've said on other threads I feel like tattle us an outlet for me & my thoughts

I had this exact issue and posted A LOT about it. My daughter is very sensitive and cautious, she’d never been separated from me and even found stay and plays difficult. She was so overwhelmed by it all that she was knackered after 3 hours in the afternoon 3 times a week. Eventually the tiredness adjusted but her behaviour deteriorated there and at home. We did also have a new baby added in after 3 months of being there which didn’t help.

Unfortunately the preschool didn’t understand her and weren’t supportive. There was a lot of meetings involved, eventually a one plan out in place and almost a referral for ADHD before we decided it wasn’t working and we were going to move her. We were very lucky to find a place at a Montessori forest school and she now does 2 full days and 1 half day and the difference in her is incredible. No more meltdowns after, a lot less challenging behaviour, happier with other children and has lots of friends in an out of preschool, and we get lots of positive feedback now which is so different to where she was before.

It sounds like the environment isn’t quite right for her. I’d be concerned that they are looking outside at naps and hay fever, rather than how they can help her settle in. Not allowing her a quiet space is a red flag for me. I am probably biased due to my own experience but any childcare that labels the child as the issue as first port of call doesn’t sit right with me.

 

[Meg78]

Just found this thread & thought I'd look for opinions.
My three year old started her free hours at nursery three weeks ago, she's doing five afternoons. At the time we applied she seemed to be dropping her nap (depending when she got up) & I was pregnant with our second so thought afternoons would be easier to manage. However she started napping regularly again, doesn't seem to matter what time she gets up & often seems to have a "crash' of energy at points during the day. She's also had terrible hayfever this year. Everytime we pick her up from nursery they say "she was tired again today, was a bit emotional, there were a few tears", nothing positive. Her dad picked her up yesterday & he said he felt interrogated about her tiredness (she was up early & had a nap in the morning but still said she was tired)& they kept asking if we gave her piriton that morning, we told them we give her piriton if her hayfever was bad but that's usually before her bed when it's worse. Her dad dropped her off this afternoon & said she might need to sleep, she was up at 7 but was in good spirits most the morning & the teacher just gave a chuckle. A few hours later we get a phone call saying she was coughing, her nose was running & she said she wasn't feeling well. OH went & got her & she came bounding in, perky as anything. Her dad then told me that the teacher said "oh you seem better now. You must just be tired & finding it all a bit overwhelming." She had asked to go to the quiet room for a sleep but there wasn't anyone to sit with her." This has really upset & angered me a bit that she couldn't have a sleep, am I being dramatic? I understand she was coughing & had a runny nose but what toddler doesn't. She had a sleep when she got home had a few coughs but nothing major, then her nose started running but once that cleared she was fine, it was her allergies, I actually think it's something at nursery she is allergic to.
I'm dropping her off tomorrow & I don't know if I should say something, I don't do confrontation but I feel likes she's an inconvenience to them but she surely isn't the only one that gets tired especially since they have ones in all day. We're already picking her up earlier than we want cos she's finding it a struggle to last longer than three hours. She had never been to nursery before,she was looked after at home & even at her stay & plays she went to she would be shattered after. We say for every hour of play she needs half an hour lounge to recover.
I feel a bit silly but I'm going to phone the health visitor to see if they think her tiredness is unusual for her age, I keep winding myself up that there might be something medically wrong with her like low iron or something. I'm also thinking seeing about changing her to the morning sessions but I know they are usually busier (which i think might overwhelm her) & might not have space & to be honest I still think she will get tired & moany at points. She is such a wee character I hate to think the staff are just seeing this whingy, tired child. Sorry for the ramble, I've said on other threads I feel like tattle us an outlet for me & my thoughts

So typically the ratio for a room of 3 year olds is 1:8, and if they’re not over staffing then they wouldn’t be allowed to pull a staff member out to sit with her for a nap. Our 3 year old was forced to drop the nap by the nursery because it was inconvenient to them, which still infuriates me, but I do understand they have to safeguard the other children.

Truthfully the tiredness doesn’t sound normal, mine was fatigued after short play sessions and it turned out to be a medical thing, once it was discovered and managed the energy is now off the charts! Unfortunately the only way to check for deficiencies is a blood test, they use a numbing cream or cold spray but it’s still quite distressing to experience, so it’s probably more palatable to confront the nursery about accommodations first

 

[smellsofbiscuits]

Well I had planned to start potty training this weekend after lots of helpful comments from this thread.

Mr B has just informed me that the toddler was sick all over the back of the car A bug has been going round his day care and I was hoping we had dodged it. Oh well!

 

[Longtimesnooper]

Thanks for the replies, we're going to see how the next two days go & arrange a meeting with her key worker. We don't have trouble getting there, shes always excited to go & runs straight in but she's definitely ready to leave when we go get her. I know its a big adjustment, I just thought with her enthusiasm to go in, she wouldn't settle no bother. It's the nursery attached to what will be her primary school, so we'd like to keep her there. I'm hoping she will have a sleep before we have to go but she got up the same time as yesterday so I'm not holding much hope.
I'm phoning the hv when she's at nursery so I can get peace to do it hopefully. Part or me wants her to get her blood checked for my own peace of mind but equally the thought terrifies me.

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

Thanks for the replies, we're going to see how the next two days go & arrange a meeting with her key worker. We don't have trouble getting there, shes always excited to go & runs straight in but she's definitely ready to leave when we go get her. I know its a big adjustment, I just thought with her enthusiasm to go in, she wouldn't settle no bother. It's the nursery attached to what will be her primary school, so we'd like to keep her there. I'm hoping she will have a sleep before we have to go but she got up the same time as yesterday so I'm not holding much hope.
I'm phoning the hv when she's at nursery so I can get peace to do it hopefully. Part or me wants her to get her blood checked for my own peace of mind but equally the thought terrifies me.

Hopefully it’s just settling in to the change of pace. Like I said I am a bit triggered due to my experience. I’d definitely ask if she can change to mornings if they can and if not, maybe make a plan for some quiet time. Do they have a quiet corner in the room she’s in?
I’d also try and keep a log on her allergy symptoms while there to see if it is something in the room triggering her.

Hopefully the hv can give some advice regarding the tiredness. I recently had to take my 7 month old for a blood test and it was really hard the first try to hold him still so I’d recommend asking for two nurses to help and get the numbing cream. It is over quickly and if you do a bit of preparation it shouldn’t be too traumatic.

 

[Megatron1298]

Hello toddler mums! Can anyone tell me what hurdles I should be looking out for with toilet training? We are on day one and my three year old has self initiated going to the potty all day - no accidents! A world of difference going pants free as opposed to previous attempts.

Tomorrow we will be going with pants on, so any things to look out for or just keep going with his lead?

 

[Definitelyme]

Hello toddler mums! Can anyone tell me what hurdles I should be looking out for with toilet training? We are on day one and my three year old has self initiated going to the potty all day - no accidents! A world of difference going pants free as opposed to previous attempts.

Tomorrow we will be going with pants on, so any things to look out for or just keep going with his lead?

Just keep following his lead! With clothes on the issue can be they don’t always have that few seconds extra warning that they need to say they have to go, get clothes down, get on the toilet. It adds a few moments and that can be too much sometimes in the first days.

 

[Megatron1298]

Just keep following his lead! With clothes on the issue can be they don’t always have that few seconds extra warning that they need to say they have to go, get clothes down, get on the toilet. It adds a few moments and that can be too much sometimes in the first days.

Thanks! Honestly so proud of him, hope he keeps going like this

 

[smellsofbiscuits]

Well I had planned to start potty training this weekend after lots of helpful comments from this thread.

Mr B has just informed me that the toddler was sick all over the back of the car A bug has been going round his day care and I was hoping we had dodged it. Oh well!

Quoted myself here but toddler hasn't been sick since yesterday morning. He's eaten well and in good spirits. So we've decided to just go for it! He's currently running around bare bum and very interested in his willy

Decided not to use a potty as we didn't with my eldest as we have a downstairs loo in easy reach. Plus we don't have carpets downstairs either which helps too.

Wish me luck!

 

[Definitelyme]

Thanks! Honestly so proud of him, hope he keeps going like this

he’s done a great job!!!

 

[Megatron1298]

Quoted myself here but toddler hasn't been sick since yesterday morning. He's eaten well and in good spirits. So we've decided to just go for it! He's currently running around bare bum and very interested in his willy

Decided not to use a potty as we didn't with my eldest as we have a downstairs loo in easy reach. Plus we don't have carpets downstairs either which helps too.

Wish me luck!

Good luck! and awesome to go straight to the toilet

 

[Jellybean093]

We are on night 4/5 if bed wetting he’s now 4, started a new school and every morning I’m going in to him wetting the bed. We put him on the toilet at 11 last night and he was soaking this morning. It’s so frustrating

 

[LilyRose1234]

We are on night 4/5 if bed wetting he’s now 4, started a new school and every morning I’m going in to him wetting the bed. We put him on the toilet at 11 last night and he was soaking this morning. It’s so frustrating

Do you think the change of starting school has led to a bit of a regression? Would puppy pad type things (they probably do children versions to be fair!) work to keep the mattress etc dry?

 

[Jellybean093]

Do you think the change of starting school has led to a bit of a regression? Would puppy pad type things (they probably do children versions to be fair!) work to keep the mattress etc dry?

Yer, I think it’s school and he’s so tired he’s not waking. We’ve got the pads, but he bloody misses them and it’s a brand new mattress. I bought a waterproof sheet yesterday, but I’m sick of bloody washing it all. It’s gone through to his duvet and pillow

 

[Definitelyme]

Waterproof sheets take so long to dry, it’s such a pain. would he entertain a pull up for a while?

2yo has been leaking out of his pull up every night for ages now. Tried so many brands and sizes, it’s KILLING me.

 

[Jellybean093]

Waterproof sheets take so long to dry, it’s such a pain. would he entertain a pull up for a while?

2yo has been leaking out of his pull up every night for ages now. Tried so many brands and sizes, it’s KILLING me.

Luckily it’s been warm today, so it’s dry, but we really can’t carry on like this. I threatened to put him in a nappy, but he’s not worn one in about a year and a half, and I don’t want him going backwards
I always found pull-ups never retained wee over night, so nappies at night, pull ups for the baby during the day

 

[Definitelyme]

Luckily it’s been warm today, so it’s dry, but we really can’t carry on like this. I threatened to put him in a nappy, but he’s not worn one in about a year and a half, and I don’t want him going backwards
I always found pull-ups never retained wee over night, so nappies at night, pull ups for the baby during the day

Even nappies have leaked overnight for him recently. He lies on his side, and there is nothing absorbent there in any of them, so it just floods out.
Doesn’t help that he drinks 40 gallons of boob overnight

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

According to my three year old I’m a “plain old lady”. Wounded.