The Samaritans

[hrh89]

I don’t know. I was in such a bad situation at the time that I just wanted them out of the house ASAP I was only young and didn’t ask how they found out but they told me they were doing a welfare check based on the call I made earlier that day (only person I’d called was Samaritans). It made things really difficult for me at home

that’s so awful I’m sorry you had to go through that considering you had the courage to phone them in the beginning! What an awful situation basically thrown back in your face. I feel for you.

 

[MidnightToker]

I’ve always wanted to volunteer for the Samaritans. Has anyone done it recently during Covid?

 

[Tui]

Hmm I donate money to Samaritan's every month, starting to wonder if I should move the money to somewhere else now.

 

[hrh89]

I used a mobile. Definitely wouldn’t have used a landline as my parents would’ve seen the call on the phone bill. I thought it was completely anonymous so felt safe to call but that night when the police officers turned up it really made my situation a thousand times worse and I’d never recommend speaking to Samaritans again after that, I think it’s disgusting that they don’t consider what danger that could actually put somebody in by sending police there without the callers knowledge. I called in the morning and it wasn’t until much later in the evening that they came as well, I think it’s disgusting that they’re allowed to do it without consent

that’s terrible. I thought they were not there to intervene but just to listen. You surely cannot send around police to someone’s house, as you say, it could make situations a million times worse. I’m so shocked by that. How could they even know where you were based on a call?

 

[Dizzy]

I believe that the volunteers are told not to tell someone they shouldn’t commit suicide, only to listen and talk. Although I think they can alert the authorities where they have genuine concerns. Their training doesn’t include advice - only to listen, only to try and cajole someone into a better place.

My Aunty volunteers for the Samaritans after her husband committed suicide. She hasn’t ever talked about her training, someone else I know spoke about their experience, as it wasn’t what they expected.

Yes the Samaritans just listen. The calls come in from all over the country and are anonymous so they’re unable to notify the police about anything even if they wanted to (which they don’t, their policy is to be impartial and to just listen).

 

[Greatbutton]

If someone calls Samaritans saying they want to kill themselves as a volunteer your cannot talk them out of it. That is the biggest no no. Instead you have to ask if they've thought of how to do it, what plans they have to do it etc etc. You have to go against instinct and every fibre in you wants to say no, don't do it because your are loved and this is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. But you can't. Also the vast, vast majority of calls to Samaritans are sex callers who can be very very manipulative, and can leave female volunteers feeling very distressed. There's a great mumsnet thread on this very issue. I'll leave it there for now.

Interesting. I had no idea. I'm not sure why you mentioned Trans people in your original post though. You'd think they would be allowed to hang up these kinds of calls where they are being sexually harassed.

 

[EmilyChambers]

What do you mean? Surely the whole point is to talk someone out of it?

Also no idea what the last sentence means so maybe you could clarify?

Samaritins are an absolute shite show. If someone was at the point of suicide, they are the last group I'd get them to call.

Hysterical, rather dramatic, quite selfish, is it always about you, you seem to have brattish tenancies is that why you are shut out

Are just a sample of phrases from 6 different phonecalls made by a family member to the Samaritins before they attempted suicide.

Luckily circumstances changed and someone came home unexpected.

I called them once, luckily I called someone else rather than take the advice of "I'm not here to talk you out of it, but first have a cup of tea, or, you know, something stronger, and get a grip of yourself and pull your socks up"

The whole organisation can fuck off to hell as far as I am concerned.

My friend is a mental health nurse and even she doesn't recommend calling them as they haven't got a clue and their ethics are totally wrong.

 

[Blonde123]

The night I was raped, I rang Samaritans in distress, suicidal and drugged by the perpetrator. The woman I spoke to made me feel such shame and humiliation that it took me years before I could tell anyone else about the rape. I don't know if it was one bad apple or what, but it really screwed me up and allowed a rapist to escape justice.

I’m sorry they made you feel like that. Never feel shame it wasn’t your fault xx

 

[Begborrowsteal]

I said 'committed suicide' - its autopilot to say it as so. Have to be conscious of how I word that. I do like the push to link mental health as a cause of death though. It gives it more power and highlights how serious and real it is, when you say someone died from depression/ptsd/psychosis etc.

 

[noonecaresaboutyou]

I read at the start of this thread that the Samaritans can’t trace you. When I was 16/17 I called them, I wasn’t actively suicidal but I was dealing with suicidal ideation and just got panicked and needed to talk to someone. Later that day two police officers were at my door doing a welfare check because of that phone call. I had no warning they were coming, wasn’t told they’d be contacted. It was a horrible experience and made a bad situation a lot worse for me as my family were home when they turned up.

That actually happened to a family member of mine, but I think it was a different charity.

 

[BlahBlahSheep]

I read at the start of this thread that the Samaritans can’t trace you. When I was 16/17 I called them, I wasn’t actively suicidal but I was dealing with suicidal ideation and just got panicked and needed to talk to someone. Later that day two police officers were at my door doing a welfare check because of that phone call. I had no warning they were coming, wasn’t told they’d be contacted. It was a horrible experience and made a bad situation a lot worse for me as my family were home when they turned up.

I don’t know what happened in your particular case so just speaking in general terms; when I was trained we were told calls can’t be traced. The phones we used were old school house phones, which didn’t have any digital display or caller ID - as a volunteer I had absolutely no way of knowing the number someone was calling me from. I didn’t know you could trace an address from a phone number (maybe you can with a landline?)

I rang them once as I was really down and one of my kids had just pushed my buttons a bit too hard
she wasn’t bothered about what I had to say-just my age,area and was I white?
i hung up

That’s also really strange. I never had to ask any of those questions to any caller when I volunteered there. Maybe some branches do things differently to others but that’s really surprised me. I’m speechless