The Chateau Diaries #91 It's really time for a revolution and most of all for guillotines

[NotAChatelaine]

Four days in and the CD Vlogvent Calendar is dire. All that fuss for what? Admittedly, the segment at the Provençal nativity figure making place was interesting, and could easily have been left at that without the tedious unwrapping of purchases back at Grifting HQ. How many nativity scenes will there be, I wonder? Not that I'm interested!

Another 20 days of mindless drivel, squeals of delight, snorts galore and content regurgitated from last year and the year before. The first year was quite entertaining because it was new and different, plus it benefitted enormously from the dynamic between SJ and Teabag - as unlikeable as he is, he does at least have an ounce of two of personality. Last year was desperate, trying to replicate what had gone before.

Philip is a Class 1, premier league prissy twerp. His omnipresence is like nails on a blackboard. As for his Y/T channel, words fail. The Unrenaissance Boy knows diddly squat about setting tables but thinks he's the arbiter of taste and savour faire because he's read up on it (but gets it wrong) and has acquired some cruddy china, cutlery and glass. All the stuff he's brought into the uninhabitable farmhouse probably makes him think he has squatter's rights. Having his feet firmly under the table - or toasty warm in the chatelaine's bed - doesn't make for security of tenure. I hope he has the phone number of a removal firm, come the moment the Great Romance bites the dust.

 

[Clara Burnett]

I would love to be a fly on the wall when there are discussion of the property. I'm sure the co-owners are somewhat submissive as she's pulling over 32k US each month for the Shitoo's upkeep and reno. From what I've observed here Nick and Potty don't care for Sir Slim Pants.

Literally nobody cares for Snorty but SJ, and even she seems to have lost a rather huge portion of her first affections for him, or so I have heard. He is making a complete ass out of himself at the moment and although SJ pretends to be supportive of his new escapades into YouTube fame, she's poking fun of him behind his back all the time. Larkin and Potty, everybody here is always referring to them as co-owners which they only are on paper but they have only invested in her HMN to keep her happy and at arm's length from their real lives, now both have serious relations with other woman and they can't be that bothered anymore. It's quite telling that this year Potty will arrive ON Christmas day instead of before, so he does not have to be involved in any more advent filming and he can keep his girlfriend out of her vlogs. Even when Potty was dating Tess Hoffman, who at that time still lived in her own chateau nearby, Potty refused to spend Christmas there without SJ and she obviously demanded him to be at the HMN with her.

 

[oooLaLande]

Howdy ho tattlers! (I, too, refuse to be called a tartlet)
Not that anyone missed me, but I’m back! A few hospital visits and many treatment sessions later, I had little energy left and I wasn’t about to waste that on shittoverse…

I tried reading and catching up as much as I could, but damn, you bunch are fast and furious when it comes to posting

in a nutshell, here is my wrap up of what has conspired;

- SJ and her shat-vent calendar of none sense has been a new low for her and CD! 4 days and I’m already over it

- PhiPhi’s new adventure…tried watching both videos, never got past the intro with the nervous snotty laughter… get a grip child! The pics of the blue table setting was tolerable tho…

-MPK, useless as ever… snub as ever… I don’t have time for you.. piss off!

- FRK… gurrrl, no! Just no!




- Dan the man with a span…Finish the damn studio already! There’s only so many times I can watch you put up dry wall and try hard not to hit the down vote… I still like him better than most in shattoverse…

- Phillip & Anna, love their style, am fan of their vlogs, don’t mind the sponsorship… probably the only ones I like as much as Dan

who am I missing? No one important I reckon…

Also, if anyone is looking for a new unique scent, I recommend anything from Le Labo. Most of their fragrances are unisex. I searched for years to find the scent that works for me, and found it in their THÉ NOIR 29 and I will never use anything else!

it’s good to be back

 

[Jeeves]

Oh thanks Clara, that's interesting! I often wonder why some volunteers ( eg Andie and Kat) keep on returning. I suppose they fall for the "magic" claims , and perhaps she "loves bombs" them? It was interesting watching Josie talking to Marie in her vlog. Josie has clearly fallen under the spell of "the magical place". She advised Marie never to go back though!

I think that this might have more to do with resilience. Characters like Kat, Josie, etc have emotional maturity. They are able to see Lalande for what it is and choose to engage as and when they want to. In between, they return to normality for a reality check. FRK, Hanni and Davy are examples of those who are seeking a need to belong to something, even if that proves to be toxic and quite harmful to their wellbeing.

 

[SloanSabbith]

I have started to mute the vlog once she starts "singing" or starts with the high pitched squealing...I just can't take it anymore.


Yes, I wonder...after all the talk of working on the advent vlogs, I'm not impressed. I was expecting something with a bit of work actually put into it and not something filmed months ago on holiday. Ollie creeps me out for some reason that I can't quite pinpoint..

Wow! I am beyond NOT impressed. What has happened -- Chateau Diaries used to be fun and entertaining. My second last straw was PJ's arrival - and then I was stunned when the reveal of the relationship came along. That was it for me. Not that I want anyone to be lonely -- not in any
way. But suddenly everything is boring and worse and terribly unsophisticated.

I have watched almost every video - from the very start -- and was totally invested. Now, this is the content we are getting for Advent??????
What am I missing?

 

[Heathcliffe]

Proposal. Will you be Mrs. Janssen? Isabelle is delighted

I do hope there will be a Christmas proposal, and I hope it is a very public one. Phillip is a gentleman, he will do it when she is dressed for it and has had her nails done, and I am sure the ring will be a one off.
You can all talk as badly as you want of the young man, but I like him! He is polite and kind and knows no less than most young men his age. They seem perfectly happy and suited. He has my permission.

 

[KiKiGee]

I wonder if Selmar has made it to Tatty's yet. Today is the day.
...and the hits keep coming...

crownethorne
31 minutes ago
PS: Stephanie for somebody who has worked as hard to build such a successful brand as you have I find it astounding to potentially tarnish your online credability by endorsing this pipe dream drivel.

crownethorne
48 minutes ago
And now this random woman Selmar has met off of the internet and has only known for a few months now has him scavenging for a chateau that's way above their means Selmar needs to switch heads before it's too late, she sounds like a total whack job!

crownethorne
58 minutes ago
these two need to change their dealer. Delusional or what!

D Mac
1 day ago
Hoping some of that kickstarter dosh can go towards a decent microphone. Their vlogs sound terrible as does this fantasy. They seemed more concerned about a character to play then the actual logistics of this. Planning event permission, Insurance, Latrine locations, Food, First Aid? They’re vegans, will they cater for a pig at the head of table? They are going to get crucified on that gossip site. Hope they have tough skin.

REPLY

Linda Lauderbaugh
1 day ago
What gossip site? Pray tell!

 

[MojoDublin]

@MojoDublin with the patrron WhatsApp group chat - do they realise the list of over 30 projects started and incomplete at the chateau? Do they read here? Have they travelled to chateau?

Top tier … all over this Discussion…
Originally ..
attitude was
it’s their ( tattle) opinion … very targeted and intrusive!!!!

Then after reading it
( it rankles that we have been correct )
Personally - and I’ve pointed this out your paying for direct access to Nutti/ SSB like a super fan …
they dropped tiers after that .

Am there taking the piss … laughing but some are disappointed and are still adjusting to their disbelief they didn’t see things faster .

Security in numbers …. Most had NEVER heard of tattle … it was a Covid miracle they found anything on YouTube

Primary concern …. Some are genuinely just very lonely
Hence why I actually adore tartlets - it’s never been the Fault of the patron

Just the scam artists that are begging for their lifestyle .

 

[KyBourbon]

Day 5 of tattvent
Introducing the co owners/ex lovers part 1

Somehow, Snorts just doesn’t seem to fit in this group…can you imagine adding his picture to the collage?

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Sorry to disagree. But, I Love her! She has more talent, brains, and class in her little finger than that woman dating a 25-year-old. Anna worked for a well-known fashion house in Paris for years...and it shows.

I'd rather have a clean, minimalist interior, comprised of tasteful quality items, and build up as we can afford to rather then fill my chateau with a load of crap from Emmaus, brocantes and junk yard fodder gifted by senile grannies clearing their attics. While Anna's colour scheme may not be to everyone's taste, it's a damn sight better than the mish-mash of colours at the shitoo. I also like the wallpapers which Anna designs and prints herself.
It's sacrilege watching SJ purchase expensive wallpapers and then poorly install them all around the shitoo. Very few people can effectively pull off a eclectic interior which looks beautiful and SJ isn't one of them - her place just looks like a junk shop and the ever increasing number of damn stuffed animals and taxidermy doesn't help.

 

[Arfarf]

Just watched maybe 45 seconds of CD today ....before logging out and returning to tattle to ask...
QUESTION #37,658 !!!
SJ ( the big liar) has been yammering for the past 6 months of doing secret filming ("Oh I am so tired from working so hard filming early for my advent vlogs" ) of her advent crap....
When really the last 4 were made just recently when Teabeg was having his drinking binge at the Shanty....
Right???
What was she really filming and editing all summer and fall then????

 

[Phoenix Richards-Bingham]

I like to think I use my powers for good, so I welcome all new tartlet members here and encourage you all to introduce yourselves and briefly say what was 'the straw that broke the camel's back' that brought you here?

In truth...I don't remember why I came here...I think I was actually Googling Stephanie Jarvis for some odd reason and found Tattle...THANK GOODNESS! I love my fellow Tartlets, and of course the Tart-gents!...I really loved Chateau Diaries at first and thought Stephanie was charming. I was never a big fan of the Gift Grab and the veil fell from my eyes when I found out about Patreon. She truly is a greedy money hungry piece of work (the only claim to WORK that she can claim!) and I really don't like her now.

 

[LaFrancaise123]

Poo troubles... !!

Cynthia
9 hours ago
IT'S DISGUSTING AND VULGAR AND DEGRADATION OF THE LIFE IF CHRIST AND NOT WORTHY OF CHATEAUX LALAND


Candace
9 hours ago (edited)
STEPHANIE IS SUCH A PERFECT LADY AND VERY GRACIOUS TOO .... HENCE TO BE BROUGHT DOWN TO THE LEVEL OF A TRADITIONAL "CACA POO MAN" .... THIS SO CALLED "TRADITION" IS DEFINITELY NOT VERY ENLIGHTENING, TO SAY THE LEAST, AND MORE SO ON HER LOVELY PROGRAMME TOO ....? ? ? IT'S ALL A LITTLE "OFF PUTTING" QUITE FRANKLY ! ! !
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Candace
10 hours ago (edited)
TRUSTING THAT "OLIVER /OLI" SHALL DEFINITELY N-O-T BE AT "CHÂTEAU DE LALANDE" 2022's CHRISTMAS CELEBRATIONS NEXT YEAR ..... ESPECIALLY DURING ADVENT TIME ! ! ! PUT SUCH A DAMPER ON THE CHRISTMAS "ADVENT" SPIRIT ! ! !


Hide 2 replies

Meredith
10 hours agoIf Stephanie was so shocked by the grossness of Oliver’s “gift” why did she record this? I found it awful — there are so many beautiful traditions to explore. What a disappointment.


Candace
9 hours ago (edited)
@Meredith I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU MEREDITH! JUST SAD TO HAVE SOMETHING LIKE THIS "ATTEMPT" TO RUIN HER V-E-R-Y GRACIOUS PROGRAMME. WISHING YOU A VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS MEREDITH !
Show less

 

[Marty McFly 9]

Too many meetings at work today to keep up with you all ... so had 10 pages to catch up on!!

Advent Day One: Vomit
Advent Day Two: Poo

Advent Day Three: snot ??? mucous ???
Advent Day Four : pus ??
Advent Day Five: sweat ??
Advent Day Six: toenail clippings?
Advent Day Seven: dandruff ?
Advent Day Eight: pimple popping ??

?????



How can you take a beautiful season of lights and joy and beauty and go in such a gross direction?

 

[Espe]

Selmar but there will be no chateau, and no welcome back from SJ. Unless he visits while she is away

I really hope that neither Selmar nor Tatiana attempts to stay at CLL when their chateau purchase falls through. Selmar has outlived his usefulness at LL and now Amaury is there, he is not needed. He will never finish the loo or do anything else useful. He is so boring and his reputation has been tarnished, partly because of the association with Tatiana and the shameless begging but also because he's been there long enough now for us to see through him. If they stay together, he should move to her home in the UK and if not, he needs to go back to the Netherlands.

 

[Jeeves]

Though I can't see Nati warming up to Dan, either.
Amaury is about to help Dan with his studio, so next would be to invite the happy couple over for a double date. Can't see Nati sitting in Dan's living room

We didn't really see Dan interact with Selmar , Titty or FRK either. He doesn't seem to have much time for the oddbods. His friendships seem to be with Amaury, Kirsty, Matt and Kat - the normal ones! He interacts with Fanny as his employer and Phiphi as her Little Emperor and Davy because of the garden "plans". I feel that he needs a badge saying " "If my mouth doesn't say it, my face definitely will." (I can so identify with this! ) Like a lot of men, he regards Nati as his mate's girlfriend - he's pleasant to her but that's as far as he needs to go - she's Amaury's choice, not his. He doesn't seem to have much to do with the co-owners or Teabag. I can't imagine that Dan would have much time for MOLD.

 

[Jeeves]

 

[Chocolategoggler]

Have had a torrid time this evening after sloping off to watch the Help courtesy of a comment on here about a poo pie from the film. Then I got an email from eBay to say that they have permanently suspended my account because of activity that is a risk to their community. Safety of their community is final so decision can't be appealed. I asked for an explanation and got a very vague reply ending that it is in our mutual best interests to part ways! So I was thinking huh? What have I done. The only slightly naughty thing I do is Tattle and I don't buy a lot from eBay and have never sold anything on there. Have told my bank and they think it's weird too. Don't think my life can get any stranger lately. Collapsed with exhaustion after my shatoo renovations, was diagnosed with a thyroid problem again, car broke down, central heating broke down, booster jab flattened me and now I am a danger to the public!!!!

 

[Definitely Maybe]

So I usually just lurk the Jack Monroe threads on here…

But back in October I was sat on a flight next to someone who, thanks to the strange man fangirling next to her for the entire flight, was apparently some kind of France chateaux renovation celebrity. I heard enough of their conversation (as did the entire flight) to Google and find her on YouTube. Made a few jokes after to my close family, forgot about it. Now I realise that as well as YouTube famous she is in fact Tattle famous!

Ooh we NEED more details please @user373738 !

 

[Jikki2]

Just had to watch another nano second of yesterday's lets drop a log vlog, to remind myself that Etch a sketch is yet another one who cannot pronounce words. He pronounces Catalonia, Catalunia. It's bad enough with SJ and her massacre of French region names, now him! Oh and Fifi never took note and got Thesaurus out to find another word for beautiful either.

It is Catalunya in Catalan language and Oliver pronounces it like Catalans do. Why do English speakers always want to butcher all the other languages?