The Chateau Diaries #409 Hey Chateau Diaries fans, XantheWilliams is really Philip Janssen!

[Madame de Pompanddoodoo]

estrelladeluxe1366
6 hours ago (edited)
You are soooo good with impromptu, so impressive. And I love hearing proper Cambridge English in a vlog, not that trashy accent so many other vloggers have. Sorry, but that’s true.

WTF Yes that proper Cambridge English ??!!? is truly wonderful. I’m sure if there was such a thing it would be interesting to hear but I can assure you it is not what is spouting forth from Fannykins.

Sorry FRK maybe unhappy but she gets no sympathy from me. If she is so unhappy why not walk away. But we know she won’t or can’t. Twice a decent future was offered to her firstly working in an hotel in Bury St Edmunds, secondly running her own flower business in Haworth and twice she walked away, leaving the people who had invested both time and money in her as the losers. She will never leave the landfill as it was the one place that she was happy when she first volunteered there. She was love bombed by Fanny and thought she had found her special place, (exactly the same thing happened with Fanny and Selmar), but FRK should realise those days are long gone and will not return. Capricious Fanny is a user and discards people as easily as other people discard an empty sweet wrapper, she then moves on to pastures new without a backward glance.

 

[Jules100]

And let’s not forget Julie.

I’m always here, usually just hanging out in the shadows of the VIP lounge, monitoring the quantity of ice cold Miller Lite whilst waiting for a newby to walk by so I can jump out from behind a portière and scare them. Thanks for the shout out.

 

[Fleur du mal]

She's admitting that she's paying her 'lover'...make of it what you want!

 

[JackSpratt]

Does the vet have to report them for animal abuse? Or not having proper tags? Who really Thinks the vet was involved??? And why did the paid help take it one themselves to euthanize? Shouldn't they have called Nick? They are his sheep.
Why didn't Fanny know until she got back home??? This whole story (lie). Is not adding up. Where is the peahens ( mother of the chicks) if she is gone and so are the chicks, probably fox food.

I've been thinking about this bollocks.

What's all this shit about not wanting to upset the cow.

It was the same with the chicken slaughters, didn't want to tell her and upset her.

What does she do howl at the moon in distress. MY ARSE!

FFS, they're all touched in the head.

I wonder does a vet have to complete paperwork as it's a farm animal.

 

[UvulaDonor]

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I usually refrain from commenting on people's looks, but in this case I can't help myself; WTF does he think he looks like??? He makes the short fat bloke on 'It Ain't Half Hot Mum' look put together, attractive and trendy.

 

[graciemckitten]

VISITING PATRON DAY DUMP ZOMBIE

kasiapontoizeau2723
1 hour ago
Dearest Stephanie, Philip, and the entire Château family, What can I say except thank you from the bottom of my heart. Patron Day at Château de la Lande was everything I had hoped for and so much more. To finally walk through the château, soak in its beauty, and meet so many kindred spirits who have followed and supported this incredible journey was truly magical. There is something very special about La Lande. It is, of course, a beautiful château, but it is also a place filled with warmth, friendship, creativity, and joy. Being surrounded by people who share such genuine affection for this wonderful adventure made the day feel like a gathering of old friends rather than a first meeting. Seeing firsthand all the love, care, and dedication that continue to breathe life into the château only deepened my admiration for everything you have created. Thank you for opening your doors, sharing your dream, and making us all feel part of the story. I left with a heart full of happy memories, a camera full of photographs, and an even greater appreciation for this extraordinary community. I feel so grateful to be a patron and a small part of the continuing adventure of Château de la Lande. Until next year, when I shall be counting the days to return! With love, gratitude, and very fond memories,Kasia

 

[Daisy Br]

Christ I think the Egyptians built the pyramids quicker than the length of time it will be before that bloody Grande Salon is finished. Four years and nothing done to actually start the project . And yet, they have all the furniture, curtains and soft furnishings needed ready and waiting because the kidney stone wanker can’t stop buying crap. It’s all sitting abandoned either in a dusty attic or a mouldy metal shipping container where it will remain totally forgotten as those two continue flitting hither and thither living their worthless lives.

From where I'm sitting, the grande salon is just more content for the vlog. She started the vlog to raise money to reno the house, then she got used to the money coming in and actually having control of it. She could spend it however she chose and, boy, could she choose. Clothes, luxury travel and various cosmetic procedures took priority over construction work and probably used up most, if not all, of the money. Now the house is just a money making prop for the vlog. The crap she buys is abandoned because she has no use for it, once she's mentioned it. She starts projects and doesn't ever finish them, so it's pretty obvious that a renovation of the chateau won't ever be finished. She'll milk it for tv and YouTube as long as she can. Lalandphil is an irrelevance, he's nothing but an employee. He'll be dumped too, when he's no longer of use.

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

Thanks ever so, @ComtesseRose for carry us forward. Budapest. Congratulations to @Jules100 these titles tickle me. @Lady Avonlea and @graciemckitten you’re both so appreciated for your contributions.

I would like to point out that, once again, the top (three this time) post(s) are Tattlers sharing Tattler news. This group is very supportive for 15 old hags and hounds.

@JackSpratt Ruby is gorgeous. So happy for you all.

I am just sick to address the issue of more dead animals at her dump. Poor, poor Aloysius suffered far too long. I’m wondering if Animal Control did arrive and removed the pea chicks from that cramped, cluttered cage and helped Aloysius to be freed from pain? I’d like to think so, anyway.

Does the vet have to report them for animal abuse? Or not having proper tags? Who really Thinks the vet was involved??? And why did the paid help take it one themselves to euthanize? Shouldn't they have called Nick? They are his sheep.
Why didn't Fanny know until she got back home??? This whole story (lie). Is not adding up. Where is the peahens ( mother of the chicks) if she is gone and so are the chicks, probably fox food.

 

[graciemckitten]

Skidmark’s manipulative speech She sounds like she is in love with dangerous Dan.No mention of her 3.5 year fake engagement with the “love of her life” Baldilocks Janssen.

I just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you for what you're doing here in this tiny corner of France. It is because of all of you and because of all of the other patrons that Land is being restored. We had done what we could when we first moved in. And after we'd spent all of the money that we had, we saw Landon just very slightly, as my mother loved pointing out to me, just slightly deteriorate each year. Nothing major, nothing like the floods that we had in the kitchen, but just a slight deterioration.


GET READY FOR THE EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION ABOUT THE POOR LITTLE 50 YEAR-OLD LITTLE ORPHAN PRINCESS BEING AT THE DUMP BY HERSELF
And it was very soul destroying to be here quite a lot of the time on my own, to see that around me, to feel totally unable to tackle it and to try doing small things that were effectively plasters over a broken leg. So when the vlog took off and when all of you started to support us, everything turned around.

GUSHING , LOVE BOMBING SPEECH ABOUT DANGEROUS DAN SHE ALWAYS HAS TO REMIND DAN THAT HE WAS A GARDENER….. SHE WILL NEVER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT HE HAS BLOWN HER AWAY IN THE YOUTUBE GAME.
And the living embodiment of that change is Dan who is I think here somewhere who is the very very first person that we employed because of the patron accounts. It was my mother who was toiling incessantly in the garden and I knew that she needed a gardener more than anything. I remember one day I said to you, "Mommy, you need a gardener." And you went, "How am I supposed to get one?" Gardener.
Gardener.

And Dan arrived. It worked. [laughter] It worked. You asked the universe. The universe answered and Dan arrived and he made such a change not only to the garden, but to the morale of the whole house. And all of you have had a chance to chat to him today will see why. Like, he's just a joy to be around.

And after that, I was able to start employing some of the volunteers who've been helping here for free all of those years because I thought, I'm not going to employ people that I don't even know rather than employing the people who were giving of their time before all of this happened. So, of course, now Maria is here. Natty,

even Philip actually arrived. He was like the one of the last waves of volunteers and is also employed here now. But you're employing the people who work on the chateauand on the garden. So people like, Pavina, Jean Kristoff out in the gardens and in the house, Amory, Chris and Ben who are also here today. All of them are here because of you.

And I think that maybe you don't always realize, you know, you're making a change to a building in France, but you're making a huge change to people's lives and giving them employment and giving them a home here. So, thank you to all of you and a huge round of applause to all of you.

 

[SaucySaysSo]

Omg….

Still genuflecting and kissing the ring? Can’t. Watch. Such. Dreck.

 

[Ladeda1957]

omg this picture he looks like a reject from Boy Scouts, I know fanny really hates him because she doesn’t take her son clothes shopping.

He‘s like a toddler. Thank you Lochy for the picture.

 

[Pyke]

Patreon Day vlog was an improvement on Fannys offerings this year, there was a sense of fun and the food looked good and dare I say enough of it for once !
The Potts (Josh) look alike was un - nerving !
The MASH Tents are simply embarassing and need burning, they could have decorated with greenery / bunting to hide / distract from them.
Snorts table setting, never have tea cups been so cack handed placed, handles should be to the right they were anything but, no side plates is just idiotic.
Sabina looked like she was about to give birth. Hanni dressed right down.
Chris loves himself more with every vlog, painful.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

The Shreks brought 2 Dump patrons ? with them to the lone Dump patron day.

“We have got a couple of lovely guests with us. We got Donna and Steph who are joining us for a few days and we're going to head up to Land on Monday.”
So, we brought our lovely guests uh, Donna and Stephanie up to Laand uh, for La lande days. So this year we are not volunteering because um it's in June this year and you know for this what we did do is we opened up um a window so that people who were coming to lalande could uh stay with us for a few days and we would bring them up and we had two people come and join us for that. And it's great to be back, great to see everybody and uh it's always a lovely day. Fortunately not quite as hot as last year but um it is still absolutely beautiful today.

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Dump patron day footage below. Click to see Shrek visit to patron day. The Shreks seem to be nice hosts to their 2 guests.

Watch at 5:34 to see Drunkle merrily selecting desserts while Skidmark is giving her “I am a wonderful saint and I Dangerous Dan speech. “ He includes footage of the demolished dining room, not so grand salon, tulip beams, a few chickens ( how many are dead/ missing) etc. No footage of the remaining sheep. I do not believe 36 patrons made it to patron day,



The Permasmile bracelet purchased by guest Stephanie who was staying with the Shreks
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The Shrek’s drove 3 hours each way (6 hour round trip) on Monday to attend Patreon Day. What a waste of time and petrol.

I believe the only reason they attended is because Steve is still holding out hope he may get paid for the work he’s done on the ‘never to be seen’ tiles. Fat chance Steve - you’ll never see a dime out of Fanny!

 

[JackSpratt]

How many patrons can you count?
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Pottie arrived just in time to take the photo.
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Please make Gerry stop with the Tartan, it's not funny just tragic.

Mummy giving the royal wave and by the looks of it Percy's had enough and he's off.

Wonder if those in the front row are high paying pillocks?

 

[graciemckitten]

Well well well. Is it just me or does Permasmile appear to be smitten by Potty?
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Pottie is certainly smitten with himself, as usual. He is his own greatest love.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

So I know some of us tartlets are patrons. How did we not know about the patron days date? Was it kept secret from everyone but the highest paying super fans?

I’ve never received any patron info from Fanny - not even a welcome postcard or email. All those piles of patron cards Fanny pretends to sign are all for show. The B&B and patron days are by personal invitation/reservation to the handful of syncophants who can’t see through Fanny’s fake facade.

 

[Jeeves]

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Look at his grubby knees! Maybe he has been visiting Tobacco Johnny in the garden?

 

[JackSpratt]

Why is she never in residence when the animals die?

Convenient isn't it, she doesn't have to give it a second thought

 

[Bogue de Juin]

Oh FFS. Fanny stated she did not prepare a speech (let's be real, she did neither jack nor shyte in the Patreon Days preparation anyways, so why would she take the time to write an actual speech?). Fanny waxed poetically to her audience about how their support enabled her to change the lives of people by being able to employ them. She mentioned most by name (albeit forgetting Dishpan Dave) and ended with how Snorts is also an employee. No mention of him actually being her fiancee...

Moreso than anything, Fanny was focused on the Temu tat of some little bum figurines that CrayCray Coco Chloe brought them all.

Julie (not to be confused with our beloved @Jules100 - Countess of the Southernmost Chateau) ended up taking charge in the kitchen, which probably pissed FRK off, but with 1,000,000 pieces of pawwwwcelain in the Shitoo, there weren't enough plates for the cheese course due to shoddy planning.

I'm not sure what Sarah and Shrek's roles were, but Aaaaandi gave a painting course and Permasmile held a tile painting class. Ah, Permasmile- we knew there was a chance it would happen, but would she be crass enough to actually do it? YES. She used this opportunity to hawk her jewelry, and some unfortunate guest bought a piece.

Potts showed up at the end for the photo. Funny how all three owners (Baghead was absent) did not lift a finger.

Andi and some guy I have never seen before ended up buying everyone pizzas for dinner. Pay to play- Fanny didn't bother to plan this either.

This Patreon Day was shyte. I think it should have been catered (it was wrong to traipse guests into the kitchen all day whilst FRK and Julie were preparing food.). Also, FRK is part of why people watch her channel- so at least give the girl some face time with the guests. The tents were hot garbage- she should have hired the marquee from last year so it could be closed off and have a portable aircon put in it.

You know what would have been a good idea? Let the guests (who pay the bills) paint tiles with their own unique artwork, fire them in a kiln and use them as a backsplash in the kitchen.

Agree..Half the speech was about Dan. Snorts was an after thought, barely mentioned.

 

[HalcyonOrganic]

How jealous you ladies are about Flip’s smooth, shaven legs, bathed in goats milk..