Mummy Dearest
Well-known member
Finish moving your junk from one end of your house to the other. Throw those wigs in their designated cabinet and feed your resident Screech Owl, because it’s time for another episode of Shat-a-loo Diaries!!
Adventure abounds today as we go here, there, and everywhere! Are you ready? Because I know I am!
A very excited Stepiphany is so psyched for the hive of industry awaiting her on this Thursday, or is it Tuesday? Maybe it was Monday, we’ll never know, so let’s just go with Tuesday. We’re going to visit Peacock Jenny, Marie the Florist and Ian x 3. We may even be a able to meet a new character perhaps? Oh, I do hope so! I absolutely love meeting new people! Off we go...
Venturing outside, we pay a visit to the Ians on their mid morning or mid afternoon break. Time has no meaning at LaLande, so it doesn’t matter. Stefanny pays them in Jaffa cakes for a days work. Back in the day, people used to be paid with money, but again, this is LaLande, where money has no meaning either. Stefunny grows tired of the Ians, who are rumored to be starting a boy band. They all play the synthesizer, it’s very New Wave. Their new album will be arriving in Fall 2021, six months before the downstairs loo is finished.
Ian 1,2, or, 3 joins Stephie on a trip to the woods. Off in the distance is a man. Who is he? What is he doing? Does he come from a distant land? We may never know...oh, come on! I wouldn’t leave you hanging like that! He’s Mr. Tree Surgeon! I’m going to assume his name is Ian. He shimmies up trees, he shimmies down trees. After he’s done shimmying, he chops them down. He’s a well decorated man, a man who knows who he is. He isn’t a big talker, but when he does, I believe he’s speaking philosophically about trees. Staphanny is dazzled by the work of this mysterious man! But she is usually dazzled by anyone doing work, work being very much a foreign concept to her. We reflect on the mission of the tree surgeon as we gaze upon the canopy and we reflect upon ourselves. Who are we? Why are we here? What is our purpose? Tree Surgeon has brought out the philosopher in all of us. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? I have no idea...Let’s go visit Marie!
Marie is back in the floral spa studio and busy as a bee! She must be getting tired from moving back and forth from the barn to the spa, she’s moved three times this week! She’s very chipper today as she shows us around the new workspace. Stephaknee is in love with Marie’s home away from home. She loves the flowers, she loves the glass jars, she loves the mess, she love the genius Macgyver skills Marie uses to attach a microphone to a boot. And she wants you to know that she loves Marie! Marie needs to do a Q & A, so we should probably let her get on with it. Before we leave, let’s give Steph a chance to love her reflection in the mirror, “I love you Stephaneee” *blows kisses to the mirror*, mirror replies, “I love you too Stephaneee” *blows kisses back*.
Word has it that the Ians are back to work after being freshly revived by the Jaffa cakes, so we must be off to the stable! Outside, the Ians have set up a brocante. All they have are chairs at the moment, so if you like to sit, this is the place for you. The price is one Jaffa cake per chair. There’s also a spinning wheel, but that’s not for sale. Sleeping Beauty wants it back in the attic before tattlers set a curse upon it. So up we go to the attic, spinning wheel in tow...
Ian and Steph poke around the attic. There’s a lovely tube television that’s either going to the dump or being saved for Philip to make a terrarium out of. There’s an old bed crown Ian holds fondly while discussing its possibilities. Where will it go? Who cares, back into the pile of junk it goes. Let’s explore something else. What’s that? A nest for mice? Don’t be ridiculous, it’s a pile of wigs. They are just waiting to make their home in the new wig cabinet. Oh, you don’t have one of those? Well Stephaneeeee does, and she wants you to know that. Ian spots a slew of old bed frames being saved for when all the guests come down with the plague at Easter. A butterfly, desperate to escape this den of iniquity, is released to freedom. Is it a metaphor for what life is like at LaLande? I don’t know, I’m not that deep. Steph and Ian talk about the resident Screech Owl, who apparently enjoys breathing and flying...who knew? Oh look, a chair, let’s talk about the chair. It needs work. If I never see another chair again it’ll be too soon...
Let go visit Peacock Jenny in the greenhouse! Peacock Jenny loves plants. She loves talking about plants. She loves looking at plants. She loves pointing at plants. She loves talking about eating plants. And most of all, she loves planting plants. Stiffanee loves plants too. She loves buying plants. Let’s eavesdrop on Stephieee as she talks to Davy about which plants to buy, clematis or raspberries. You can see the wheels almost turning in her brain as she ponders life’s great questions, shhh, we don’t want her to know we’re listening...ok, she’s off the phone now, let’s watch Stephanieee buy plants! Marie gleefully enter’s the mistresses royal bedchamber with a gift of plants. Stephaneee‘s bored with Marie, so we’re off to visit the mysterious tree surgeon and talk about trees. He appears to prefer the company of trees than the company of a chatelaine, I like him already.
Back into the house, where the Ians are obsessed with chairs. They have closed down the brocante because the locals tried to buy chairs with croissants instead of Jaffa cakes. At this point, I’m starting to think that they get paid to move chairs from one end of the chateau to the other, all day, every day. Just moving chairs...
What a fulfilling day it’s been! We’ve seen it all and contemplated life’s great questions. I, for one, am feeling deeply spiritual as I walk away from the Church of Stephinology. I’ve left my money and all worldly possessions at the gate and walk away with inner peace and tranquility knowing that Stephanie loves me, loves you, loves Ians, plants, Marie, Tree People, Peacock Ladys, and most of all, herself. Go in peace and love.
Adventure abounds today as we go here, there, and everywhere! Are you ready? Because I know I am!
A very excited Stepiphany is so psyched for the hive of industry awaiting her on this Thursday, or is it Tuesday? Maybe it was Monday, we’ll never know, so let’s just go with Tuesday. We’re going to visit Peacock Jenny, Marie the Florist and Ian x 3. We may even be a able to meet a new character perhaps? Oh, I do hope so! I absolutely love meeting new people! Off we go...
Venturing outside, we pay a visit to the Ians on their mid morning or mid afternoon break. Time has no meaning at LaLande, so it doesn’t matter. Stefanny pays them in Jaffa cakes for a days work. Back in the day, people used to be paid with money, but again, this is LaLande, where money has no meaning either. Stefunny grows tired of the Ians, who are rumored to be starting a boy band. They all play the synthesizer, it’s very New Wave. Their new album will be arriving in Fall 2021, six months before the downstairs loo is finished.
Ian 1,2, or, 3 joins Stephie on a trip to the woods. Off in the distance is a man. Who is he? What is he doing? Does he come from a distant land? We may never know...oh, come on! I wouldn’t leave you hanging like that! He’s Mr. Tree Surgeon! I’m going to assume his name is Ian. He shimmies up trees, he shimmies down trees. After he’s done shimmying, he chops them down. He’s a well decorated man, a man who knows who he is. He isn’t a big talker, but when he does, I believe he’s speaking philosophically about trees. Staphanny is dazzled by the work of this mysterious man! But she is usually dazzled by anyone doing work, work being very much a foreign concept to her. We reflect on the mission of the tree surgeon as we gaze upon the canopy and we reflect upon ourselves. Who are we? Why are we here? What is our purpose? Tree Surgeon has brought out the philosopher in all of us. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? I have no idea...Let’s go visit Marie!
Marie is back in the floral spa studio and busy as a bee! She must be getting tired from moving back and forth from the barn to the spa, she’s moved three times this week! She’s very chipper today as she shows us around the new workspace. Stephaknee is in love with Marie’s home away from home. She loves the flowers, she loves the glass jars, she loves the mess, she love the genius Macgyver skills Marie uses to attach a microphone to a boot. And she wants you to know that she loves Marie! Marie needs to do a Q & A, so we should probably let her get on with it. Before we leave, let’s give Steph a chance to love her reflection in the mirror, “I love you Stephaneee” *blows kisses to the mirror*, mirror replies, “I love you too Stephaneee” *blows kisses back*.
Word has it that the Ians are back to work after being freshly revived by the Jaffa cakes, so we must be off to the stable! Outside, the Ians have set up a brocante. All they have are chairs at the moment, so if you like to sit, this is the place for you. The price is one Jaffa cake per chair. There’s also a spinning wheel, but that’s not for sale. Sleeping Beauty wants it back in the attic before tattlers set a curse upon it. So up we go to the attic, spinning wheel in tow...
Ian and Steph poke around the attic. There’s a lovely tube television that’s either going to the dump or being saved for Philip to make a terrarium out of. There’s an old bed crown Ian holds fondly while discussing its possibilities. Where will it go? Who cares, back into the pile of junk it goes. Let’s explore something else. What’s that? A nest for mice? Don’t be ridiculous, it’s a pile of wigs. They are just waiting to make their home in the new wig cabinet. Oh, you don’t have one of those? Well Stephaneeeee does, and she wants you to know that. Ian spots a slew of old bed frames being saved for when all the guests come down with the plague at Easter. A butterfly, desperate to escape this den of iniquity, is released to freedom. Is it a metaphor for what life is like at LaLande? I don’t know, I’m not that deep. Steph and Ian talk about the resident Screech Owl, who apparently enjoys breathing and flying...who knew? Oh look, a chair, let’s talk about the chair. It needs work. If I never see another chair again it’ll be too soon...
Let go visit Peacock Jenny in the greenhouse! Peacock Jenny loves plants. She loves talking about plants. She loves looking at plants. She loves pointing at plants. She loves talking about eating plants. And most of all, she loves planting plants. Stiffanee loves plants too. She loves buying plants. Let’s eavesdrop on Stephieee as she talks to Davy about which plants to buy, clematis or raspberries. You can see the wheels almost turning in her brain as she ponders life’s great questions, shhh, we don’t want her to know we’re listening...ok, she’s off the phone now, let’s watch Stephanieee buy plants! Marie gleefully enter’s the mistresses royal bedchamber with a gift of plants. Stephaneee‘s bored with Marie, so we’re off to visit the mysterious tree surgeon and talk about trees. He appears to prefer the company of trees than the company of a chatelaine, I like him already.
Back into the house, where the Ians are obsessed with chairs. They have closed down the brocante because the locals tried to buy chairs with croissants instead of Jaffa cakes. At this point, I’m starting to think that they get paid to move chairs from one end of the chateau to the other, all day, every day. Just moving chairs...
What a fulfilling day it’s been! We’ve seen it all and contemplated life’s great questions. I, for one, am feeling deeply spiritual as I walk away from the Church of Stephinology. I’ve left my money and all worldly possessions at the gate and walk away with inner peace and tranquility knowing that Stephanie loves me, loves you, loves Ians, plants, Marie, Tree People, Peacock Ladys, and most of all, herself. Go in peace and love.
The cult of the most revered lady of the lost lake and leaking loo has come to a full circle.
about her situation in the past, she’s come clean, she’s showing progress, she’s churning out videos, she’s happy, and if she keeps working, she’ll do well. As for you lot, while I appreciate the background and secret agent work, as well as other people’s opinions - I can’t take the negativity. There’s some real hate in here.
SJ 
Elias Truedsson
chat - Jill Scott, New Zealand
shouting down from her balcony
camera shots? All I can think of when she doesn’t edit that out is, “Girl, know your audience”. Her mugging for the camera, flipping her hair, flirting, flopping out her booblets, prancing around in a dressing gown in front of workers, doesn‘t say to me anything but “I’m an attention whore.” I can’t take her seriously! Especially when she plays ‘knowledgeable historian’, I’m like “Girl, please, we all know you’re pulling the facts from Wikipedia, congrats on being able to read.” Then when she plays Betsy Bakes-a-lot and bends over in front of the camera to cut the cake, I’m thinking “ Girl, tuck in the breasticles, no one wants a slice a cake if your booblets fall into it”. I have no idea what my point is, if you figure it out, let me know
Right on! I used those tricks in my younger days, laid on the charm, batted my eyelashes, whole 9 yards. Then I grew up. I can read Stephanie like a book because I’ve read it a long time ago.