The Chateau Diaries #108 Crazy, strange, eyes wide shut, in the middle of nowhere

[Clara Burnett]

I am very curious about the rodent infestation. How is it typically handled in rural France? Here in the US you have to make sure you’re building is completely sealed. You obviously do not leave your doors or windows open, or you’re just asking for it. You have to make sure there’s no piles of plant matter or tall vegetation up against the building. No debris or piled up wood. I have a friend who owns a pest control business. He does commercial and residential. When he deals with mice or rats he uses bait boxes, snap traps, and poison. Like carpet bombing but with poison. Then you have dead bodies everywhere and you have to inspect and dispose. Can she just hire a pest control company and put them on contract. You can buy all the stuff yourself. Humane traps is BS. They breed so fast. I’m a fan of killing what’s in your house, because it can kill you, but not beyond that.

I don't know how it's generally dealt with in France, but would expect much the same: traps to kill whatever is coming in. SJ's way of "dealing" with it in her HMN is slightly different, probably not a surprise, as she ignores anything that goes over her not so pretty head. So that's what they all do at the shittoo: they ignore the rodent infestation if it's in places where they don't come very often and wait until it gets completely out of hand. Maybe then they send in Mary Poppins to clean up.

I would assume Ian as her contractor makes a pretty good bit of dough.

He actually doesn't. He gives her a price for a job (e.g. Nutty's apartment), usually really low, and then pays his workman himself. He's not getting rich from her, that's for sure.

From what I've understood reading the comments here, the 'employees' are all independently contracted so she doesn't have to pay all the contributions, taxes, etc. Not sure about Nati's position. That's why employers love when services are contracted out. The down side for the workers is that they have to be disciplined enough to save money for their taxes and retirement. Some do, some don't.

The interesting thing is that you can only employ people this way if they are doing a defined job for you, like 'fix the heating' or 'paint a room'. The way she employs people, she should be paying social fees for them. I am quite sure she doesn't, certainly not for all of them.

 

[Jeeves]

I imagined $1000 so I guess I wasn't far off base.
There definitely should be mutual tagging going on! And wow, £2300 workshop ...on what merit does FRK think she can charge that lofty price I wonder.

Clearly, £1000 of that would have been for the vast quantity of flowers she ordered. (In other words, Iwa paid for the flowers plus approximately £1300 for the "tuition".). The excess means that FRK has benefitted from being able to use Iwa's flowers for her own purpose as Iwa won't be taking her flowers with her. (Goodness knows what that is, as she doesn't appear to do much work for sales, other than her Christmas reets.)
Iwa paid not only for a very dubious workshop (FRK doesn't appear particularly adept herself when demonstrating her hand tied bouquet) but also provided Marie with far more flowers for her own use than she has ever managed to get her hands on before.

FRK isn't a "people person". I suspect the whole point of these grossly over-priced workshops is to fund flowers for Marie to decimate once the "pupils" have left.

 

[Clara Burnett]

I don't understand the high heeled boots - he is already quite a tall boy. It must just be a style preference... or are they costume boots from one of the Narnia wardrobes?

He's also wearing those when he's out and about, well, at the Emmaus that is, because nowadays grocery shopping is beneath the lord of her shittoo and because he is famous he can't just go anywhere (his literal words). He gets a lot of attention with them, and not in a good way...

 

[Sparrowsfart]

Clearly, £1000 of that would have been for the vast quantity of flowers she ordered. (In other words, Iwa paid for the flowers plus approximately £1300 for the "tuition".). The excess means that FRK has benefitted from being able to use Iwa's flowers for her own purpose as Iwa won't be taking her flowers with her. (Goodness knows what that is, as she doesn't appear to do much work for sales, other than her Christmas rents.)
Iwa paid not only for a very dubious workshop (FRK doesn't appear particularly adept herself when demonstrating her hand tied bouquet) but also provided Marie with far more flowers for her own use than she has ever managed to get her hands on before.

FRK isn't a "people person". I suspect the whole point of these grossly over-priced workshops is to fund flowers for Marie to decimate once the "pupils" have left.

I went to Marie's Instagram as I wanted the link to Iwa's Instagram, but there's no photos of Iwa now. Where there before?

 

[Kickintheass]

Clearly, £1000 of that would have been for the vast quantity of flowers she ordered. (In other words, Iwa paid for the flowers plus approximately £1300 for the "tuition".). The excess means that FRK has benefitted from being able to use Iwa's flowers for her own purpose as Iwa won't be taking her flowers with her. (Goodness knows what that is, as she doesn't appear to do much work for sales, other than her Christmas rents.)
Iwa paid not only for a very dubious workshop (FRK doesn't appear particularly adept herself when demonstrating her hand tied bouquet) but also provided Marie with far more flowers for her own use than she has ever managed to get her hands on before.

If FRK ever gets a second client for her course they will have seen the extensive flower shop selection provided for Iwa and will expect the same. One box of carefully curated flowers from Hoek would have been plenty for her course.

 

[john eccles]

It costs me well over €15,000 per month to employ Ian, Amaury, Dan, Kirsty, Nick the Tree Surgeon, Matt, etc. (Nati, Philip, Mary Poppins and Dave are employed, not by Patreon, but from my YouTube revenue). The rest of the monthly account is for materials, equipment (digger, etc), panelling, wallpaper - anything fixed (no furniture). The rest is put aside for the lake fund. As my patrons know, no patreon funds are used towards my travels, clothes, etc. It’s only for work being done to the chateau, including the wages of those working on the chateau. Patreon does not cover any of the chateau’s running costs, which are paid for by me from my YouTube revenue. Sadly, far from lying in bed all day, I spend my time making as many videos as possible in order to renovate Lalande and continue to pay everyone’s wages. I used to do much more physical work around the chateau, but, as you can imagine, my job is now to provide content through filming and editing, to keep everyone around me in work.

Posting this for future reference. I would assume Ian as her contractor makes a pretty good bit of dough. Also, it was pointed out by The Chateau Sisters that materials are way more expensive in France. I have no idea how the money all works out but I will still be shocked if she actually shows any *real* numbers.

I was quite shocked by Fanny's financial reveal. Allow me to explain the shock, some years ago I had the pleasure of knowing a government solicitor. I remember him telling me, that when it comes to finances, "never put anything on paper". So, whether Fanny is being upfront or more likely spinning porky pies, she has put it on paper for all the world to see. One question I do have is, she said that only her Patreons see her financial statements, but surly this is a load of balls?

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Chateau de Lalande is no longer the casual shabby, chic holiday party pad they once enjoyed. It’s still shabby, but Youtube has changed the chateau’s status for better or worse. So it’s time Fanny, and indeed Nic & Potty, step up & reconsider their approach to the chateau, to ensure the current business model & income stream is sustainable.

So, here’s a little something to help them set Chateau de la Lande's 2022 business objectives:

1. 263 vlogs – way too many & definitely quantity over quality. Maximum 150 vlogs per year comprised of:

• 1 patron video + 1 CD video per week.
• Monthly Q&A with patrons to update on projects & financials
• 24 Advent vlogs which are shorter, better planned & more entertaining
• 10 additional vlogs on special topics (ex: trip to an historic sight)

2. Stop Cadeaux in Q1
3. SJ resume responsibility for filming/editing/publishing vlogs
4. Terminate Videographer/Editor role. If Philip is deemed an employee, SJ has made this termination more challenging & potentially more costly by engaging in a personal relationship, but his employment status must end asap
5. Since Office Manager no longer needs to track Cadeaux, this frees up 50% of Natti’s time to focus on improved financial tracking/bookkeeping.
Obtain necessary training & accounting software as required.
6. Focus on & complete any 3 substantive renovation/restoration projects in a professional manner (ex: Grand Salon panels, chapel windows, terrace
stonework & steps)
7. If continuing on Chateau DIY, ensure projects are properly pre-planned & completed on time and to a high standard

Also, postpone starting a European travel vlog with Oli as it will only dilute much-needed time & attention from Chateau de La Lande.

 

[LaFrancaise123]

Dave joined as a part-time cleaner a few months ago, to help Marie Poupin. He's been in a couple of the vlogs.

Do they really need all this staff ??

I mean Lalande is not a big chateau. A big manor ok but not Versailles or Chambord !

I have come to wonder if all these people don't take advantage of the Chatelaine.... and her new money.

 

[Lady Avonlea]

Di they really need all this staff ??

I mean Lalande is not a big chateau. A big manor ok but not Versailles or Chambord !

I have come to wonder if all these people don't take advantage of the Chatelaine.... and her new money.

A fool and their money are quickly parted!

 

[Clara Burnett]

View attachment 1006150
Let's make her reply less defensive and egocentric. Less "me's and "I's"!

Hi, Dan! Thanks for your comment. I appreciate where you are coming from as it appears that you are not a patron. Each supporter on Patreon is privy to information you aren't. They receive regular personal updates and are aware of where their financial support goes. At the moment, more than half of Patreon support funds the employment of several workers at Lalande which include Dan, Ian, Amaury, Kirsty, Matt, and Nick (the tree surgeon). That's more than 15,000 Euros. A large part of the Patreon funds go to building materials, equipment, among other things, and a sum is put aside to finance the restoration of the lake. Nati, Philip, Mary Poppins, and Dave are also employed by the chateau, but their salaries come from my income from YouTube, which also covers for the day-to-day running of the chateau. Patrons are aware that their donations are used strictly for the restoration of Lalande. Zero amount is ever used on traveling, clothes, food, etc. My role in all this, which has now become a full-time job is to create content about chateau life that everyone, yourself included, can watch and enjoy. There was a time when I did much of the work and spent my savings to restore the chateau, but thanks to YouTube and the help of patrons, Lalande is not only getting restored but is able to provide employment to more people.

How's that Stephanie? Only 4 personal pronouns, not freaking 14! Less Narc-sounding, eh?

Less Narc for sure, but unfortunately still full of lies.

The only ones it makes any sense to actually employ as staff employees of Lalande via Patreon are Amaury and Dan. Dan may have switched over from a self employed contract worker as the jobs and hours began to increase to actual employee of the chateau. The others though must be self employed otherwise that would be odd indeed. She's not diffentiating that some are hired as contractor and paid by the job, not a monthly income. Unless Lalande has it's very own construction builder (Ian) on staff along with a staff carpenter (Amaury) now? Doubtful.

Instead of clearing up things by explaining, her comment has made things seem even more shadier, but actually closer to the truth she was trying to hide in the first place. This is why she prefers to keep things hidden and not give any real updates: she knows her words will only mess things up, as she has no clue what she is talking about. This is also why her plan is to just share the report of the accountant with the patrons, once he's finally done cleaning up her mess and get rid of the evidence of her fraud mistakes, so she doesn't have to talk about it herself. She's a lost cause when it comes to transparency.

 

[Eduardo35]

The Shittoo de La Dump needs her......especially fanny!

 

[Clara Burnett]

This made me realize something else about her comment . Since I've been corrected that she has not actually disclosed any financials to patrons, then what she is saying about patrons being aware of what's spent isn't actually true, right?

There you go, you are catching on to her! In her limited understanding of things, it is true though: because she always speaks the truth and is the embodiment of love, life and laughter, it must be the others that lie.

 

[LaFrancaise123]

So, with all these talk of if SJ paying Social Security and blah blah for employees...
At least in Canada, when an employer pays for social security and what not (for us it's CPP [Canada Pension Plan] and EI [Employment Insurance]) the amount that is paid on behalf of the employee, is deducted from their gross pay. So for example if your gross pay is $3,000 a month, after tax. CPP and EI deductions, you will probably end up getting closer to $2,000 net payment.

So, EVEN IF SJ is properly employing these people and paying all these additional fees, they are not going out of her pocket.

And that is my contribution for the day. I'm now going back to lying down and reading

In France, the employees pay a part of the social charges from their salary too. Plus the employer pays the rest of the social charges for their employees.

 

[john eccles]

i bet he wears them in bed..too omg what a scarecrow...

Yes, as I have said before, he has the aero-dynamics of a biro pen refill.

 

[Rory]

We are nearing the last weeks of January. Date and setup for annual garden party still not announced. Presumably the July/August period still not open for bookings.

Come on SJ - when are all your lovely patreons coming to the big event. You will need to book portable loos and marquees. You don't want Selmar and Tatty to grab all the available stock.

 

[Clara Burnett]

The most anyone's going to get from the financial statements is an all up employee cost under "Salaries and Employee Taxation", or something similar. Ditto contractors fees under "Cost of Works", or similar. I can only speak for the UK but there are very good HR and commercial reasons why specific salary details are always excluded. I'd be effing furious if my salary was published in the company accounts.

Very true. Those privacy rules are obviously put in place to protect employees, but very often abused by employers to hide their fraud. We will probably never know, unless Monsieur Tax finally wakes up (or gets a wake up call....)

 

[NotAChatelaine]

Chateau de Lalande is no longer the casual shabby, chic holiday party pad they once enjoyed. It’s still shabby, but Youtube has changed the chateau’s status for better or worse. So it’s time Fanny, and indeed Nic & Potty, step up & reconsider their approach to the chateau, to ensure the current business model & income stream is sustainable.

So, here’s a little something to help them set Chateau de la Lande's 2022 business objectives:

1. 263 vlogs – way too many & definitely quantity over quality. Maximum 150 vlogs per year comprised of:

• 1 patron video + 1 CD video per week.
• Monthly Q&A with patrons to update on projects & financials
• 24 Advent vlogs which are shorter, better planned & more entertaining
• 10 additional vlogs on special topics (ex: trip to an historic sight)

2. Stop Cadeaux in Q1
3. SJ resume responsibility for filming/editing/publishing vlogs
4. Terminate Videographer/Editor role. If Philip is deemed an employee, SJ has made this termination more challenging & potentially more costly by engaging in a personal relationship, but his employment status must end asap
5. Since Office Manager no longer needs to track Cadeaux, this frees up 50% of Natti’s time to focus on improved financial tracking/bookkeeping.
Obtain necessary training & accounting software as required.
6. Focus on & complete any 3 substantive renovation/restoration projects in a professional manner (ex: Grand Salon panels, chapel windows, terrace
stonework & steps)
7. If continuing on Chateau DIY, ensure projects are properly pre-planned & completed on time and to a high standard

Also, postpone starting a European travel vlog with Oli as it will only dilute much-needed time & attention from Chateau de La Lande.

to which I would add:

Create a proper office space, in which all paperwork is kept and filed for easy reference. Plans (architectural, garden, heating & plumbing, electrical, external water supply septic tank, etc) insurance policies, payroll into (!), Details of annual maintenance contracts (I'm getting carried away now!), etc, etc. Everything pertinent to the chateau, the Association, YouTube and the B&B/gite rental.

I know that there's a great move towards paper free and working exc!naively on the hoof via laptop or iphone/ipad/smart phone/tablet. However, there are some documents for which hard copy is necessary. And a proper filing system of invoices, bank statements, etc. for accounting purposes makes life so much easier for everybody, not least the the accountant and his/her sidekicks.

It is also more productive and "forces" one to concentrate if there is a designated office rather than perching at the kitchen table or the nearest available chair.

I do wonder if they have any understanding of GDPR in terms of the Patron info they hold . I was extremely glad to step aside from administering a charitable entity soon after data protection regs in the UK became beyond a nightmare.

 

[john eccles]

I think that by having public gardens and an amphitheater planned with the work leading to a public use, it is considered to be in line with the purpose of the association. If she opens those gardens up for viewing there is a running cost of maintenance that is in line with the ultimate goal.

Sorry, but what the hell is there for anyone to see in the gardens, they look like crap. If tourists actually came to view her gardens, attached to a crumbling farmhouse situated in the asshole of nowhere, I would sincerely hope that the 'men' in white coats and nets would be on standby.

 

[Clara Burnett]

It does indeed look the same
so my question is this. Since the matching cupboard or one very close to it, has been sitting in her attic for the past 16 plus years …… it leaves one to wonder …… what the hell she’s been doing for those 16 years that she couldn’t discover a huge cupboard like that and make use of it ?

It's the other way around: she put the cupboard in the attic herself, because she only needed the bottom part in the kitchen back then. Nothing to discover in that attic, everything that is there is put there by SJ in the first place. When she took over the shittoo she was convinced the Nadaillac family would have left some kind of forgotten treasure, so she spend a lot of time searching without any luck. But since then she certainly knows about each and every piece of scrap wood that is stored in her attics.

 

[Luna20]

When SJ and Annmarie are back at the Royal dump, I bet some jobs will be done fairly quickly. Purely because SJ always wants the biggest slice of cake. The idea that Fleuries has surpassed her in subscribers and possibly in patreon will drive her. I think they will ''cancel'' their trip to Venice. Which simply means they will make enough content for the week they are off and not mention to anyone that they are off.