Phoebe Court @swfeebs #2 Want a lecture? You're in the right place, brace yourself for a boob in the face

[Huffchug]

I've never heard a midwife or doctor say all that matters is a healthy baby.
Every midwife I have been to/ spoke to has always said Mother and Baby. Not just baby

Exactly, my midwife and health visitor were just as interested in me as they were the baby. I’m sure they even said it more than once because I was so focused on my daughter they reminded me they were there for me too. But what do we know, other people’s actual experiences aren’t good enough for her agenda

 

[EnoughAlready]

Midwives are always interested in Mother and Baby, it’s patient led care, their duty of care is for mother AND baby. She pees me off so much putting them down constantly like she knows everything, all because she’s been pregnant and had a baby once before. I think the chip on her shoulder comes from her wanting to do things her way, but with her bmi being in a range that medics put you as a higher risk, I’ve been in this situation myself and yeah it’s not nice being told your “high risk” that a hospital birth etc will be better for you/ you need more appts etc, if you have your heart set on something else. But as much as I know to trust my own instincts, I’m also not medically trained and will take advice from people who are, so me and my child at the time were healthy and happy. If god forbid something ever went wrong, who would she blame if she didn’t listen to medical advice, I wanted a home birth but with my high bmi at the time I couldn’t live with myself if something had have gone wrong! She needs to back off bashing those who want to care for women as much as their babies!

 

[Jerseymiss]

It's OK, we didn't like her when she wasn't pregnant, continuity and all that tit.

This killed me off

 

[WhatABore]

Their advise to not have a home birth ect when overweight ect, that's not just in the interest of the baby. It's because they see it as safer for you, as the mother. Because you are at risk of so many more things.

 

[Nohairdontcare]

Their advise to not have a home birth ect when overweight ect, that's not just in the interest of the baby. It's because they see it as safer for you, as the mother. Because you are at risk of so many more things.

most of the risks are still very very low though.

I think the highest risk is for blood clots and that’s under 10%. So still very small the grand scheme of things

 

[WhatABore]

most of the risks are still very very low though.

I think the highest risk is for blood clots and that’s under 10%. So still very small the grand scheme of things

I'm more using that as an example as to how it's about the mother too. Not just baby

 

[Seththebunny]

Midwives are always interested in Mother and Baby, it’s patient led care, their duty of care is for mother AND baby. She pees me off so much putting them down constantly like she knows everything, all because she’s been pregnant and had a baby once before. I think the chip on her shoulder comes from her wanting to do things her way, but with her bmi being in a range that medics put you as a higher risk, I’ve been in this situation myself and yeah it’s not nice being told your “high risk” that a hospital birth etc will be better for you/ you need more appts etc, if you have your heart set on something else. But as much as I know to trust my own instincts, I’m also not medically trained and will take advice from people who are, so me and my child at the time were healthy and happy. If god forbid something ever went wrong, who would she blame if she didn’t listen to medical advice, I wanted a home birth but with my high bmi at the time I couldn’t live with myself if something had have gone wrong! She needs to back off bashing those who want to care for women as much as their babies!

She just needs to back off bashing a job she doesn’t and probably would never know how to do. My sister in law is a midwife and I can’t begin to imagine the pressure of bringing a tiny human safely into the world as well as keeping mum safe. When she’s capable of doing the job then I’ll listen to her, until then, she needs to shut her face

 

[HAB88]

Both me and my baby were poorly when she was born, we had to both stay in hospital for a week. My baby was in SCBU and I'd stay with her for as long as I could. I came back to my ward to pump breastmilk at around 2am and the midwife was waiting at my bedroom door. She gave me such a ticking off, much in the way a mother would, as I hadn't been coming for my meals and obs and she was worried I was not looking after myself which would do no one any favours. She let me pump, brought me food and then literally tucked me in bed and took my milk to SCBU. She was there to look after me, the Mother, and a bloody sterling job they all did too! I'll always look back on my birth and post natal experience support with so much gratitude for how much they helped me.

 

[Stickytoffeepudding]

She just needs to back off bashing a job she doesn’t and probably would never know how to do. My sister in law is a midwife and I can’t begin to imagine the pressure of bringing a tiny human safely into the world as well as keeping mum safe. When she’s capable of doing the job then I’ll listen to her, until then, she needs to shut her face

Can’t like this more. I want to love this 10000.
Thank you

 

[insta(sham)]

Midwife actually means ‘with woman’ and one of the worst reasons to go into it as a career is because you ‘like babies’ most midwives that I have met do the job because they want to advocate for and support women during one of the most challenging and transitional times in their life. The babies are cute and all but feebz misconception that it’s all about the baby and not her is so far off the mark it’s unreal. I think she is one of these who love the attention of being pregnant and obviously is feeling hard done by this time round, maybe because IME with a toddler, you are so busy and there is someone else to think about, it is a bit different than the first time round.

Met up with a friend yesterday who has had a second baby recently - she had a dream first birth but second was ‘traumatic’ to use her words. Feebz might be in for a shock if she thinks a bit of twatting about with hypnobirthing is going to exempt her from any problems in labour!

 

[PureGegg]

I wonder if she has considered the pressure and stress on the NHS with everyone having more babies, living longer, more medical trials and offerings than ever....the NHS is struggling with money and time.

I doubt a midwife turns up to work rubbing their hands with glee that they can ruin a mum's experience...when in actual fact they probably left their last shift only a few hours ago and are being pushed from pillar to post trying to look after too many ladies (majority of who are not in the best frame of mind in the throes of labour, whilst dealing with the ones demanding 'their rights ' and worrying about the ones who aren't saying anything.

Let's also remember said midwife is human, has a beloved family at home who they are missing out on working extra shifts to cover those off sick due to stress and cover the ever increasing cost of living.

By all means have an opinion on what mum's can expect from labour, and rightly ask questions because that is also ok. But have a bit of thought for the environmental factors and that poor midwife hauling themselves out of bed for another day when being battered from all angles.

 

[WhatABore]

So many people in the comments are saying how they totally agree because they had a traumatic birth. Almost as if they think the midwives didn't care enough about them so that's why they had to have emergency csections or something That's my take on their comments anyway.
A lot are saying about the aftercare too which my aftercare, every single visit, I was asked how I was feeling. But if you're going to sit there saying you're okay, they're not mind readers. If you're not honest, they can't help you.
One person said they didn't get help until they broke down in their doctors office. But if you don't tell them, how are they supposed to know?

 

[Skalle]

I can't believe shes still preggers, feels like the worlds longest pregnancy

 

[EnoughAlready]

I can't believe shes still preggers, feels like the worlds longest pregnancy

oh this isn’t that long yet, she’s said a few times: “I’m always telling people to count to 43 weeks as I went to 42 with Vesper” buckle in for the long haul as I think she’s really against inductions?! Although I do think she’ll go before that this time around!

 

[Mum123]

oh this isn’t that long yet, she’s said a few times: “I’m always telling people to count to 43 weeks as I went to 42 with Vesper” buckle in for the long haul as I think she’s really against inductions?! Although I do think she’ll go before that this time around!

Of course she’s against inductions, and medical intervention and advice, and just professionals in general.
Mother Earth feebs will have baby at home, baby will come when baby is ready, baby knows what to do, my body knows what to do blah blah zzzzzzz lets hope and pray nothing goes wrong eh, how would your body know what to do then! Do you know people used to die in childbirth years ago phoebe because there weren’t professionals around then with all the knowledge and experience to be able to save your life and your baby’s when things went wrong.

 

[Youarewelcome]

Ive just got this feeling her baby’s going to come early (as in earlier than she thinks it’ll be born at 42 weeks) and it’s going to be far from the dreamy floating on a cloud Labour she hopes.

 

[Fridayschild82]

No chance. She’ll sneeze the kid out at 42 weeks on the dot (right on time!) so she can continue to be smug and preachy for the rest of her days.

 

[Blondetech]

It's OK, we didn't like her when she wasn't pregnant, continuity and all that tit.

Quite possibly my favourite post EVER

 

[Duck1234]

Just wondering if she’s thought about preeclampsia, because I was induced at 37 weeks with it. Like you & your baby could die, so of course you would be induced!? Or maybe she thinks it’s made up or that she’s too perfect to get it. I didn’t even really know what it was before they said I was being induced. Didn’t question it though, the doctors & midwives know best.. most probably have given birth themselves as well as deliver babies & deal with pregnant women every day. It’s just really annoying she thinks this way. What is she trying to prove? Everyone wants you to have a healthy baby & unproblematic birth... so shut up already!

 

[Wotsit]

Wonder if she's in labour, there's been no posts all day which is unusual