Causewaygal
Chatty Member
i can’t keep doing this ... I know I’m lucky to live in a beautiful home with the North Antrim coast outside my window but the joy has gone from my life. Doing this completely alone is killing me inside
- Notice
TunaLuna
New member
I’m beginning to question everything now, the impact these restrictions are having on people’s mental health, small businesses, people’s livelihoods is really really troubling and I feel like I can’t voice this to anyone without backlash and being a “conspiracy theorist”. Well if a conspiracy theorist is simply questioning this after a year of lockdown then give me my tin foil hat! Really not looking to start a debate but everyone’s entitled to their feelings no matter how they feel. This pandemic is really turning us all against each other 
StrawberryCream
VIP Member
I actually seen someone on twitter today post about how depressed and lonely they feel in this lockdown and someone replied to it saying ‘at least you’re not on a ventilator though’ honestly some people are such dickheads, it makes me so pissed offWe need to normalise not feeling bad about feeling bad. I catch myself doing this all the time when I’m speaking to people.
“I shouldn’t complain because I still have my job”.
“There are people who have it worse than me”.
We’re all in this together and we’re all struggling for different reasons. Your feelings are valid and you’re entitled to them regardless of where you live or the view from the window
LittleMy
VIP Member
If I didn’t have my children or my husband in my life, I don’t think I would cope at all. I suffer depression and anxiety, and there have been so many times throughout the pandemic where I’ve wanted to end it (sorry if that’s triggering for anyone). I never would, I have my family to live for, but the longer this continues the worse my mental health is becoming. We’re just going through the motions, every day is the same and there’s nothing to look forward to. My children are struggling and I can already see the effects lockdowns have had on them. They used to love being outside and playing but now it’s a battle even to get them out the door. It’s such a struggle trying to get through the days. I refuse to read/watch the news daily as it just makes me feel worse.
ThreeSteaksPam
Chatty Member
We need to normalise not feeling bad about feeling bad. I catch myself doing this all the time when I’m speaking to people.
“I shouldn’t complain because I still have my job”.
“There are people who have it worse than me”.
We’re all in this together and we’re all struggling for different reasons. Your feelings are valid and you’re entitled to them regardless of where you live or the view from the window
Cl365090
Chatty Member
Just wanted a rant and felt like this was the right place. I’m a new young mom on maternity leave so for a start it can be lonely feeling like all my friends aren’t interested anymore and not many of them have babies and don’t really bother. Can’t see my family and living alone with my baby has been so hard. Not had much support with my baby and I also struggle with Bipolar and despite mental health support I’m just finding this so hard doing this without my family. He hasn’t even met most of his family yet. I have had my first dose of the vaccine due to being vulnerable. I just long for a sense of normality. Feels like every day is the same
I love my baby so much and they’re the only thing that’s kept me going honestly. It’s so hard being shut in
I’m just glad to be healthy and have a healthy baby that is a blessing in itself and I feel ungrateful and silly and over dramatic moaning
hope everyone is well and coping ok
Take it a day at a time is my best advice x
I love my baby so much and they’re the only thing that’s kept me going honestly. It’s so hard being shut in
I’m just glad to be healthy and have a healthy baby that is a blessing in itself and I feel ungrateful and silly and over dramatic moaning
hope everyone is well and coping ok
Take it a day at a time is my best advice x
LittleMy
VIP Member
Honestly, if you’re struggling alone with a new baby, I would say fuck the rules and see your family. Your mental health and well-being and that of your child’s is important too. You have to weigh up the risks yourself in situations like that. Props to you for taking care of baby during the pandemic. Being a new mum is isolating enough sometimes without a bloody pandemic to contend with on top of it
jarv
VIP Member
It's all relative ultimately! We're in the same storm but everyone has a different boat. I'm glad there's threads on tattle where I can get all this stuff out without fear of someone saying "it could be worse" etc...
StrawberryCream
VIP Member
I think pubs and restaurants will reopen around Easter but I think they have no plans to drop social distancing measures, rule of 6 and mask wearing so it makes me feel like what is the point ?? Yes at least the pubs will be making something but surely they will be running at a loss and inevitably have to close their doors. Last year my opinion on it was different and I was thinking well fair enough, the vaccine was being talked about a lot and things looked promising for this year, but now we actually have mass vaccine rollout and still probably going to have to keep these restrictions. Thing is we will all accept it too because this lockdown has been so shit we will literally take anything that the gov give to us now
CosmicCreepers
VIP Member
University has been extremely hard this year. I am lucky in the sense I have many feedback sessions online but it is not one to one anymore and I sometimes get too anxious to screen share during group calls. I also had begun to get to know someone at uni and we even went on a quasi-official date during the tier system days and had a drink together. Not seen her since November and we have been put in the same group for a uni project, but I just wanna see her
I hate complaining though as I'm living with 2 of my friends in a shared house which is more than some people have...but we are all sad asf in our rooms most days. And busy asf with uni work. Saturdays are our day to sort of unwind and watch a movie together but it always seems like something in the film will remind us of covid, and even now every song we play we end up relating to covid in some way. I actually think I'm gonna have this entire year on my mind for the rest of my life. Like I'm gonna be constantly worrying if this is gonna happen again.
Also OP I totally agree with the feeling fed up even with a privileged life. One thing this pandemic has taught me is no amount of money is gonna make me happy, I just need people.
I hate complaining though as I'm living with 2 of my friends in a shared house which is more than some people have...but we are all sad asf in our rooms most days. And busy asf with uni work. Saturdays are our day to sort of unwind and watch a movie together but it always seems like something in the film will remind us of covid, and even now every song we play we end up relating to covid in some way. I actually think I'm gonna have this entire year on my mind for the rest of my life. Like I'm gonna be constantly worrying if this is gonna happen again.
Also OP I totally agree with the feeling fed up even with a privileged life. One thing this pandemic has taught me is no amount of money is gonna make me happy, I just need people.
Rockin' Robin
VIP Member
The first lockdown was easier because Spring was approaching, and my partner and I spent a lot of time sitting in his back garden. It was lovely watching everything he had planted flourish, home grown vegetables were lovely.
But this current lockdown has been so much more difficult, miserable weather, no where to go ect. One consolation is the days are getting longer (more daylight) the weather will hopefully improve over the next few weeks.
I long for the days where I could hop onto a bus and go wherever I wanted. And I miss going to pubs with my partner. I really feel for all those in the hospitality industry, newly opened businesses opening early last year, only to have to close again because of the lockdowns. Many of these businesses will never reopen.
I really wish for some kind of normality.
But this current lockdown has been so much more difficult, miserable weather, no where to go ect. One consolation is the days are getting longer (more daylight) the weather will hopefully improve over the next few weeks.
I long for the days where I could hop onto a bus and go wherever I wanted. And I miss going to pubs with my partner. I really feel for all those in the hospitality industry, newly opened businesses opening early last year, only to have to close again because of the lockdowns. Many of these businesses will never reopen.
I really wish for some kind of normality.
LittleMy
VIP Member
I wasn’t the most outgoing person prior to Covid anyway and my life pre-Covid was being a stay at home mum to two under 5’s, which could be so isolating in itself. But you know, I could hop on the bus with the kids and take them places like soft play, other parks, into town for a browse or visiting relatives. We’d even take the train down to visit my mum who lives by the coast. I’d spend most mornings with my Gran in her house, keeping her company for a few hours and I miss our chats over a cuppa before I had to pick my eldest up from nursery while the little one plodded around. It wasn’t much, but not having the freedom or spontaneity to do these little things has been hard.
I work now as a key worker, nights in a care home. I’d applied before lockdown as we needed both incomes and the kids were due to start school and nursery respectively. I got started straight away because of the pandemic and witnessed the terrible cost of Covid in the care home. I even caught it myself due to a lack of appropriate PPE at the time and caring for Covid positive residents. My other half was between jobs before lockdown 1 hit - he had just been accepted for a better paying job and had worked his notice period but didn’t even get started as lockdown happened and now the company he was going to work for has had to close down. He was unemployed for the first time in his working life. He hasn’t been able to find work due to having to look after the children who were supposed to be in nursery and school.
I’m lucky to have a job, but it hurts when I think that I was doing this to better our situation but now I have to just to make ends meet. OH misses working and I feel that the children don’t always get the best of me anymore because I’m exhausted and stressed out from work. Thankfully they will both be able to return to school and nursery on Monday as we’re in Scotland, but it’s still the uncertainty of this happening again. OH wants a job but what if cases rise again and schools and early years have to close their doors? Who will look after our children? It’s draining.
I work now as a key worker, nights in a care home. I’d applied before lockdown as we needed both incomes and the kids were due to start school and nursery respectively. I got started straight away because of the pandemic and witnessed the terrible cost of Covid in the care home. I even caught it myself due to a lack of appropriate PPE at the time and caring for Covid positive residents. My other half was between jobs before lockdown 1 hit - he had just been accepted for a better paying job and had worked his notice period but didn’t even get started as lockdown happened and now the company he was going to work for has had to close down. He was unemployed for the first time in his working life. He hasn’t been able to find work due to having to look after the children who were supposed to be in nursery and school.
I’m lucky to have a job, but it hurts when I think that I was doing this to better our situation but now I have to just to make ends meet. OH misses working and I feel that the children don’t always get the best of me anymore because I’m exhausted and stressed out from work. Thankfully they will both be able to return to school and nursery on Monday as we’re in Scotland, but it’s still the uncertainty of this happening again. OH wants a job but what if cases rise again and schools and early years have to close their doors? Who will look after our children? It’s draining.
I can't even begin to imagine what it is like for new mums in all of this. Motherhood can be isolating enough as it is without lockdown to contend with. Please feel free to message me if you want to talk more - I'm a first time mum and my daughter is now a toddler but I remember those early days and months and how tough it was.
I feel lucky to have my husband and daughter but we have no family close by and whilst Skype and facetime is great, it's definitely not the same. I feel grateful that my daughter is still able to go to nursery but I feel guilty that she seems to prefer being there than at home because it's more fun and she can see other kids but the weekends are just being home and we are exhausted from work and the general monotony of lockdown. I can't get excited over the 200th trip to the same park, we have no space for crafts as my husband is working at the dining table and we have to be careful of noise because his bosses moan that our daughter occasionally shrieks or cries at meal times which are taking place less than a metre away from his workspace because it is THE ONLY place either of these things can happen! I can't bring myself to even consider what is going to be announced next week as I dont care about pubs or shops. I just want to see my mum and dad, let my daughter play with her friends, go back to a brilliant toddler class every week and do something other than the fucking park!
Moira Rose
Active member
As said above, definitely form a child support bubble.
I too have had a baby during lockdown and like you, suffer with BPD and there is no way I could do this alone. It's almost been a year now (baby was born a day or so before this whole thing began!) and it's hard enough even with my child support bubble. You'll wear yourself down doing it all alone with issues already weighing on you. Don't be afraid to reach out to family or friends for help. It doesn't matter what curtain twitchers think
If you think you'd like to - you can always rant to me in my inbox. That goes for anyone who needs a friend right now.
Thank you for starting this thread. I live in Canada so I know our restrictions are different then yours in the UK.
But I honestly feel like I am just living one big groundhog day. I am a person who typically is okay to spend quite abit of time alone and enjoys my own company, which is usually a blessing since my husband works away. But I feel like I am going crazy lately.
And I too feel like I am judged or not allowed to feel certain ways because I haven't lost my job while my husband was laid off for 7 months last spring.
This whole thing is just hard and I wish people were more kind and aware of others feelings and wouldn't feel the need to make it a pissing match or make you feel like you aren't entitled to feel the way you.
Sorry for the rant haha had alot more to get off my chest then I thought I guess
But I honestly feel like I am just living one big groundhog day. I am a person who typically is okay to spend quite abit of time alone and enjoys my own company, which is usually a blessing since my husband works away. But I feel like I am going crazy lately.
And I too feel like I am judged or not allowed to feel certain ways because I haven't lost my job while my husband was laid off for 7 months last spring.
This whole thing is just hard and I wish people were more kind and aware of others feelings and wouldn't feel the need to make it a pissing match or make you feel like you aren't entitled to feel the way you.
Sorry for the rant haha had alot more to get off my chest then I thought I guess