Single by Choice

[Olgivy]

I’ve discovered a new joy, or I am officially getting old.

Gardening.

Who knew it could be so fun? Lately I seem to be thrilled at the idea of picking my plants for my hanging baskets. Hot pink petunias! And painting my terracotta pots for my rhododendrons. I am even considering getting a straw hat, because we are going all in with the “wild times” over here. Boring b. But seriously, the peace I have not dealing with men anymore, is unlike anything I could have predicted. It’s like my bandwidth has expanded, there are seemingly more hours in the day, and I’m much more creative.

It’s interesting, because I offered to cut the next door neighbours lawn last weekend, and while I was edging (not that kind) I could hear the two of em’ arguing. And all I could think was “that used to be me” sat inside in my pyjamas at midday, arguing with some twit who was committed to misunderstanding me. Felt weird to be on the other side, because Lord knows my old neighbours must have heard an f bomb or two. It was all such a waste of time. At one point, I heard her say “oh go on then. walk off like you usually do” And I thought to myself, “they just lose respect for you once you live with them.” It’s that complacency, and casual indifference about my feelings that I don’t want to experience ever again. Or explaining emotional intelligence to a grown adult. It sucked the life out of me. Will I be in a relationship again? Never say never. But the likelihood is that I won’t be. My standards are not of this world, and it’s ongoing, the peace I’m making with that.

 

[Zenchick101]

I’ve discovered a new joy, or I am officially getting old.

Gardening.

Who knew it could be so fun? Lately I seem to be thrilled at the idea of picking my plants for my hanging baskets. Hot pink petunias! And painting my terracotta pots for my rhododendrons. I am even considering getting a straw hat, because we are going all in with the “wild times” over here. Boring b. But seriously, the peace I have not dealing with men anymore, is unlike anything I could have predicted. It’s like my bandwidth has expanded, there are seemingly more hours in the day, and I’m much more creative.

It’s interesting, because I offered to cut the next door neighbours lawn last weekend, and while I was edging (not that kind) I could hear the two of em’ arguing. And all I could think was “that used to be me” sat inside in my pyjamas at midday, arguing with some twit who was committed to misunderstanding me. Felt weird to be on the other side, because Lord knows my old neighbours must have heard an f bomb or two. It was all such a waste of time. At one point, I heard her say “oh go on then. walk off like you usually do” And I thought to myself, “they just lose respect for you once you live with them.” It’s that complacency, and casual indifference about my feelings that I don’t want to experience ever again. Or explaining emotional intelligence to a grown adult. It sucked the life out of me. Will I be in a relationship again? Never say never. But the likelihood is that I won’t be. My standards are not of this world, and it’s ongoing, the peace I’m making with that.

Honestly I think they almost lose respect for you when you're the one chasing, pushing things forward and "wanting things". I've had a fwb arrangement for the last two weeks now. Which works great for me because my mind is too occupied with other things. I go to him for a bit of fun to destress from a not fun phase of life. With my mind being elsewhere I'm not the one chasing with texts, or asking for anything I just go with the flow which is surprisingly nice. I don't know how to explain it. It's like I'm getting company and affection without the stress of being in a relationship?

Seems like it might be making me more attractive as well.

 

[qqwertyy]

This is nice. I love hearing older women saying reassuring things 🫶

 

[Olgivy]

Honestly I think they almost lose respect for you when you're the one chasing, pushing things forward and "wanting things". I've had a fwb arrangement for the last two weeks now. Which works great for me because my mind is too occupied with other things. I go to him for a bit of fun to destress from a not fun phase of life. With my mind being elsewhere I'm not the one chasing with texts, or asking for anything I just go with the flow which is surprisingly nice. I don't know how to explain it. It's like I'm getting company and affection without the stress of being in a relationship?

Seems like it might be making me more attractive as well.

Well if it works for you, and makes you happy then I say, go for it. For me, I’d rather water my plants then wonder if what I’m doing is making me more attractive to a man. But you do you.

 

[Zenchick101]

Well if it works for you, and makes you happy then I say, go for it. For me, I’d rather water my plants then wonder if what I’m doing is making me more attractive to a man. But you do you.

Appreciate it. I just meant that at least for right now I need affection and company but I don't want to give up the freedom being single gives me.

 

[HeadlessPostman]

I’ve discovered a new joy, or I am officially getting old.

Gardening.

Who knew it could be so fun? Lately I seem to be thrilled at the idea of picking my plants for my hanging baskets. Hot pink petunias! And painting my terracotta pots for my rhododendrons. I am even considering getting a straw hat, because we are going all in with the “wild times” over here. Boring b. But seriously, the peace I have not dealing with men anymore, is unlike anything I could have predicted. It’s like my bandwidth has expanded, there are seemingly more hours in the day, and I’m much more creative.

It’s interesting, because I offered to cut the next door neighbours lawn last weekend, and while I was edging (not that kind) I could hear the two of em’ arguing. And all I could think was “that used to be me” sat inside in my pyjamas at midday, arguing with some twit who was committed to misunderstanding me. Felt weird to be on the other side, because Lord knows my old neighbours must have heard an f bomb or two. It was all such a waste of time. At one point, I heard her say “oh go on then. walk off like you usually do” And I thought to myself, “they just lose respect for you once you live with them.” It’s that complacency, and casual indifference about my feelings that I don’t want to experience ever again. Or explaining emotional intelligence to a grown adult. It sucked the life out of me. Will I be in a relationship again? Never say never. But the likelihood is that I won’t be. My standards are not of this world, and it’s ongoing, the peace I’m making with that.

Not boring at all ! Wish I could have friends like you where I live who are into gardening and other simple joys

 

[FrostyChops]

I like doing anything home related. Gardening, diy - it's my home, l can do what l like with it. No compromise.

 

[Meringue22]

I’ve discovered a new joy, or I am officially getting old.

Gardening.

Who knew it could be so fun? Lately I seem to be thrilled at the idea of picking my plants for my hanging baskets. Hot pink petunias! And painting my terracotta pots for my rhododendrons. I am even considering getting a straw hat, because we are going all in with the “wild times” over here. Boring b. But seriously, the peace I have not dealing with men anymore, is unlike anything I could have predicted. It’s like my bandwidth has expanded, there are seemingly more hours in the day, and I’m much more creative.

It’s interesting, because I offered to cut the next door neighbours lawn last weekend, and while I was edging (not that kind) I could hear the two of em’ arguing. And all I could think was “that used to be me” sat inside in my pyjamas at midday, arguing with some twit who was committed to misunderstanding me. Felt weird to be on the other side, because Lord knows my old neighbours must have heard an f bomb or two. It was all such a waste of time. At one point, I heard her say “oh go on then. walk off like you usually do” And I thought to myself, “they just lose respect for you once you live with them.” It’s that complacency, and casual indifference about my feelings that I don’t want to experience ever again. Or explaining emotional intelligence to a grown adult. It sucked the life out of me. Will I be in a relationship again? Never say never. But the likelihood is that I won’t be. My standards are not of this world, and it’s ongoing, the peace I’m making with that.

I absolutely love gardening!! Nothing makes me happier than making my garden look just as I like it. And I get so excited buying plants I buy so much from a couple at my local market they always throw in a free bedding plant

 

[Nurseali]

My fireplace and settees are pink.
First thing I did when I had peace again in my home. Painted the fireplace and went to DFS.

I also spent £90 on Lovehoney products

 

[Meringue22]

My fireplace and settees are pink.
First thing I did when I had peace again in my home. Painted the fireplace and went to DFS.

I also spent £90 on Lovehoney products

I just bought a load of Lovehoney products I’ll have more fun alone than I ever did with my ex husband that’s for sure!

 

[qqwertyy]

I saw this on Threads recently and it made me so sad! I know it’s mostly tongue in cheek but it’s so common for women in relationships to say how they’d only eat toast etc. if they lived on their own. Imagine only living half a life because you’re waiting around for a man.

 

[Closedeyes]

I saw this on Threads recently and it made me so sad! I know it’s mostly tongue in cheek but it’s so common for women in relationships to say how they’d only eat toast etc. if they lived on their own. Imagine only living half a life because you’re waiting around for a man.

duck me that is sad!! Live ya life. Ugh. I’m in an old white shirt that’s got a big ink stain on the tit and some denim shorts and if I had a man in my life then I’d be in the same thing cos feck him!!

 

[Closedeyes]

Happily happily single for 6 years. Don’t want to be in a relationship. Bisexual but only had 2 relationships in my life and both with men with one resulting in my son. Anyway, little old Ms Eyes over ere is having a fwb situation with a woman I met through work and I heckin love it. Not told anyone but felt like I could be honest with you lot. She’s in her mid 20s and doing a PhD so busy busy busy but we get together every week and snog like 16 year olds

 

[Nurseali]

Having spent a lovely day off sat in the garden scrolling , reading and gardening it cemented my life choices hearing next door.
When he wasn't speaking to her like she was a pile of tit just on this earth to serve him he was huffing and puffing over what seemed the most basic of DIY jobs as if he was building the Titanic.

duck that for retirement.

 

[petitspois]

From time to time I come across a couple that genuinely get on really well, have a laugh and are a team. They build a life together and have a family and that seems just wonderful but a truly equal, loving partnership is so rare, in my opinion at least.

 

[Nurseali]

From time to time I come across a couple that genuinely get on really well, have a laugh and are a team. They build a life together and have a family and that seems just wonderful but a truly equal, loving partnership is so rare, in my opinion at least.

Oddly the ones on Facebook I used to be jealous of have opened my eyes. One found out her husband started an affair the week they got married!!! Another caught hers licking out his sister in law on their settee like she was a Magnum!

The couples I know that do genuinely work I rarely see post mushy stuff.

 

[MollyMalone]

Oddly the ones on Facebook I used to be jealous of have opened my eyes. One found out her husband started an affair the week they got married!!! Another caught hers licking out his sister in law on their settee like she was a Magnum!

The couples I know that do genuinely work I rarely see post mushy stuff.

Like she was a magnum

Edited to add: terrible situation obviously but that phrasing has killed me off

 

[Wooh]

Like she was a magnum

Edited to add: terrible situation obviously but that phrasing has killed me off

Same. Dying! I'm going to really enjoy my next Magnum, which will probably be soon. Great advertising for both

 

[QueenBW]

I saw this on Threads recently and it made me so sad! I know it’s mostly tongue in cheek but it’s so common for women in relationships to say how they’d only eat toast etc. if they lived on their own. Imagine only living half a life because you’re waiting around for a man.

Different perspective here but what if what they're actually saying is that they wouldn't conform to societal expectations of what a "life" is, and how much you should go out and liv e for others if they were on their own.

I actually do a lot more of what I want to do when I'm single, and that often means being home early, with a good book and having something simple for dinner. It is in no way, shape, or form a half life. It's what I want

 

[Zenchick101]

Happily happily single for 6 years. Don’t want to be in a relationship. Bisexual but only had 2 relationships in my life and both with men with one resulting in my son. Anyway, little old Ms Eyes over ere is having a fwb situation with a woman I met through work and I heckin love it. Not told anyone but felt like I could be honest with you lot. She’s in her mid 20s and doing a PhD so busy busy busy but we get together every week and snog like 16 year olds

Ah a woman after my own heart. It's the perfect arrangement isn't it, company and affection regularly, but if you can mentally shut off your mind afterwards, none of the stress of a relationship. Plus you get to keep the freedom of being single.

I was facetiming a friend the other day who's still pining for an ex she was with for 6 months last year.. looking into every social media detail trying to figure out if it means anything.. meanwhile she's spending all this energy on nonsense instead of living her life to the fullest.