Simon Harris #7 Twagic

[Pkershaw]

Do the joke you copied off Richard Herring with added Barry for the 500th consecutive time, Si!!!

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I enjoy the irony of the “Every. Sodding. Year” line. This tone-deaf narcissist hasn’t posted anything original or new on Facebook since 2016. Broken Record is his middle fucking name.

 

[CookieZippy]

He's been pushing a fundraiser for a teenage boy with an inoperable brain tumour. I'm honestly surprised he's had the restraint not to attach his Octopus referral link to the posts about it.

 

[CrackingOwlSanctuary]

Kids today don't know they're born, you never used to be able to hijack the good will of a cause on social media and act as a redundant middle man to handle donations for reasons, you had to go out and tin rattle on the streets face to face.

 

[CrackingOwlSanctuary]

If I'm exposed Si you can explain to your followers why me thinking you are a tedious wanker is worse than you laughing about Hillsborough until recently.

 

[mchops]

You turned comments off because you are a coward.
Just for once take your fucking fat hands out of your pocket and put your hands up. Stop lying. It won't work. The slither of "internet fame" is long gone.

 

[Pkershaw]

This is the point he is so oblivious to. Him and his weirdo followers. They are the left wing equivalent of all the wight wing baddies they pompously mock. Just as tribal, just as extremist in their views and intolerant of alternative opinions. Just as fucking irritating.

He’s so desperate to zing Darren Grimes that he swaps the word home for house. It’s completely normal to describe your town, your country, or even your fucking planet as your home, Simon, you fucking idiot. What a sad and pathetic attempt to desperately crowbar in a takedown. Swing and a miss at one of the easiest targets going, Fat Boy.

 

[Pkershaw]

14 likes and 2 comments for our intrepid social media legend. Impressive stats. Shame one of the comments is slagging off his Octopus grifting

“i’M A cOnTEnT cWeaToRrr”

Course you are, Simon. His “career” really is circling the plughole.

 

[Pkershaw]

I don't get the endless recycling

Nor me. The tedious repetition, over and over again. Surely he knows that he became a laughing stock because of the banana joke. Yet he STILL can’t resist it, every wretched time.

Bank holidays mean we’ll get a side splitting “when is bin day” gag. Christmas brings us lynx africa and “what day is it today LOLZ”. September is back-to-school so we get that overwritten bilge about Peruvian cotton workers on the space station. The met office naming an upcoming storm automatically triggers the stupid photo of his fat ugly head crying over a wheelie bin. Storms are a double-dip because you wake up to a new trampoline in the garden. A night in a hotel means we get a 1,500 word hilarious ramble about slow conveyor belt toasters.

And then you’ve got the anytime-use material. Center Parcs is expensive. So is pick and mix at the cinema. BMW drivers don’t indicate. “Person on slimming world didn’t syn a mashed banana ”. Here are some magazine covers that weren’t funny in 2016. Hysterical parody text from the school office, and the fabricated screenshot of a comical typo. “Made up person wanted to know what time the pubs shut but they wrote Pubes ROFL!!!”

I’m sure I’m doing him a disservice by leaving out a few of his greatest hits.

 

[Blue bunny]

The fact he is now doubling down on the fact he might commit suicide is vile.

 

[Seaford Haggington]

The barefaced cheek of a proven internet grifter giving a sermon about acceptable online behaviour. And sure, point everyone to the place where your dubious schemes are chewed over at length.

 

[lilykestrel]

Did Essex Police's advice include "yes, definitely vaguepost about it and keep vagueposting about it and make sure all your followers see your vaguepost about it"

 

[Pkershaw]

He’s done impressive numbers on his latest side-splitting observational toilet humour though. 8 likes and 2 comments. Including an always-hilarious reference to running out of toilet roll from one of his maniac followers tee-hee-hee

Not bad for a social media legend with 279,000 followers

 

[Bread]

Careful... Those asterisks in brackets will excite Simon...

 

[Pkershaw]

He’s reached that sweet spot where he’s such a shambles as a human being that it’s impossible to tell whether he’s trying to make a joke, or actually pulling another moronic stunt. Driving his children 300 miles through a snowstorm for the dopamine hit of 50 Facebook likes is something that he would actually do.

 

[mchops]

How can you call yourself a content cweator is the big question. You just jump on bandwagons and steal others work.

 

[MickeyMouseClubhouse]

He’s done impressive numbers on his latest side-splitting observational toilet humour though. 8 likes and 2 comments. Including an always-hilarious reference to running out of toilet roll from one of his maniac followers tee-hee-hee

Not bad for a social media legend with 279,000 followers

Your Post has more likes and comments!

 

[MickeyMouseClubhouse]

Alright, own up girls. Which one of you is the guilty party? Come on, must’ve been one of you!

I think it’s worth noting that your six-year-old son was bound to find out sooner or later that his dad is a nobhead, Simon. In fact he probably already knew.

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(P.s. “she looked a bit Reformy”. You pompous, sneering, self-righteous, condescending arsehole, Simon. I personally know a Labour voter who definitely thinks you’re an enormous twat so don’t start thinking people only hate you because of political tribalism. That may be the only reason people like you, but that doesn’t work both ways).

I'm not 'Reformy', but I'd totally call you a nobhead in public, Si.

Does he not realise he is universally hated across all political outlooks?

 

[anniemouse]

Stealing other people’s jokes again Si, worth every penny of that council money.

 

[Blue bunny]

I just randomly remembered his tea towel empire

 

[Clovis]