Simon Harris #6 Even the Duke of Marlborough only charges £4.99 for a tea towel

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Congratulations @RandomFishOils (nominated by @Lazarus). You both win a hilarious (*) napkin teatowel

(*) citation needed

Simon's back. He said he can't talk about the shenanigans. The contract with ECC as ended, but Essex is United lives on. His Twitter is still gone, but Facebook prevails!

As I write the ECC Audit, Governance and Standards Committee are meeting to discuss the Social Media Issues. The juicy bit will probably be behind closed doors though, and it may be a total whitewash.

Recaps please!
 
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Kirsty awarding contracts to her friends and associates will be discussed in the private part of the meeting.
 
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OK, I was holding this back - more about Kirsty and the cabal

In another instalment of the lifestyles of the enriched and infamous, we peek into the fun and frivolity of one of Kirsty and the Gang's regular haunts. The Prince of Wales Pub in Stow Maries you may ask? Regrettably not. Was that because it was booked, fulfilling its newly discovered mission as the sole and only suitable location in South Woodham Ferrers or environs at which essential community engagement or suicide prevention training could be hosted through the careful selection by and patronage of Essex County Council or Mid and South Essex Integrated Care Partnership?

Was it because it was full of just a tiny percentage of the about 23.5 million people with whom deep and meaningful relationships had been cultivated in just six months, through the data-led and strategic deployment of social media mapping and community activation, enabled by the crack team of social media strategists and content creators assembled by O'Callaghan, and helmed, Picard-like, by Simon Harris... from a shed...in his back garden?

We don't know.

No, our protagonist had to make do with second best on certain occasions. The humble and entirely functional surroundings of Claridge's Bar in London, currently offering an excellent afternoon tea at £90 per person. https://www.claridges.co.uk/restaurants-bars/afternoon-tea/
Were "profiteroles" or "spongers" cake on the menu? Did they get a Groupon? Does Claridge's ever do Groupons? It might forever be a mystery.

Of course, having those very important people (VIPs) present on such occasions is priceless (not literally). If there is one thing we have all learned, it is that, as the proverb says, "tis a long lane that has no turning."
Simon, Aunty Shalaleh, Jake Searle….. anyone else?

Let's check…



https://www.essex.gov.uk/running-council/spending-and-council-tax/spending-digital-community-engagement-pandemic-2020

Was Jon Morter in attendance. One would expect it to not be his kind of thing. Is Nicky Kaur significant? We don't yet know.

So, O'Callaghan must make do with Claridge's Bar. And not the first time either; but only when the Prince of Wales was unavailable, of course.

Here's Kirsty, Aunty Shalaleh and Jake Searle and a mystery man.

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You're both so naughty.

So naughty infact, that O'Callagan couldn't resist another visit to Claridge's this time in 2022 shortly before her chapter at Essex County Council was to come to an end. But what to have? How about for starters, a beautiful, well deserved and potentially tax-deductible (once the Social Kind accounts have been sorted out!) "Lychee Martini".

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Was it perhaps a celebration? Was it perhaps following a difficult time at Essex Public Health Team shortly after a fraud investigation that may or may not have taken place? We just don't know. In the words of Essex County Council,

"Given the small number of people in the team it would not be fair to confirm or deny whether or not such an investigation had taken place given the expectations of privacy in the employment relationship, including this employment. "

There is so much to choose from their extensive cocktail menu, and with prices of around £22 a tipple https://www.claridges.co.uk/siteassets/restaurants--bars/claridges-bar/menus/2023/claridges-bar-drinks-menu-march-2023.pdf , it really is quite reasonably priced.

What we do know, is that very shortly after, O'Callaghan left Essex County Council and posted proudly on her Linkedin:

"So excited to start a wonderful new role and challenge as Director of Community Resilience Mobilisation and Transformation at Mid and South Essex Integrated Care Board"

And what a perfect role. It's almost as if the Job Description available online and for a while after she started the role, could have been written for her.... leaning into, as it did, her well-established skills to:

"...think beyond organisational boundaries and coalesce to work together on areas of common purpose, place or interest..." and to

"...lead innovative approaches through social media to reach and activate communities....act as a system connector to bring increased social value, alignment and cohesion in new and existing community programmes with system partners..."
 
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Spoilering cos it's a lengthy Simon essay about weight loss

'this was due to stress' wonder what that was about :unsure:


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He always has to get in a reference to squeezing out a massive turd. Definitely another fetish I think. Meanwhile Keith has made a comeback in new post that hasn't gone as he'd hoped and most of the of the comments saying they agree with Keith and that parents should be more considerate.


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Congratulations @RandomFishOils (nominated by @Lazarus). You both win a hilarious (*) napkin teatowel

(*) citation needed

Simon's back. He said he can't talk about the shenanigans. The contract with ECC as ended, but Essex is United lives on. His Twitter is still gone, but Facebook prevails!

As I write the ECC Audit, Governance and Standards Committee are meeting to discuss the Social Media Issues. The juicy bit will probably be behind closed doors though, and it may be a total whitewash.

Recaps please!
Why thank you! I’ve now had a Jack Monroe thread title and a Simon Harris thread title. I only need one now for James “Depher” Anderson and I’ve won the grifters’ trifecta!
 
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I bought my house near a school 30 years ago. The traffic in those years has massively increased. Am I not allowed to moan about people blocking my drive? Fat bleep si
 
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"I think in fairness SH would accept that now"

would he???
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As someone who has 20 years’ experience in corporate comms, I find Morter’s comments arrogant, insulting and absolutely disgusting. Myself, or anyone in my team, from comms officer upwards, certainly could have delivered such a project, better, cheaper and as part of their day job. They have the “nous”, Jon, we’ve already been doing it efficiently and quietly for years while you have been dicking about telling any poor sod who’d listen how you got some old band to number one 15 bleeping years ago. And as an ex-Head of Comms, and the ultimate guardian (and buck carrier) for the organisation’s reputation, I certainly would have demanded oversight. I wouldn’t let some arrogant little prick contractor like you on a few grand a year brush me off. The audience are taxpayers, the people who pay our wages. The comms team has a duty to its wage payers to deliver the best performing and most cost effective service it possibly can. Maybe if the comms team had been allowed oversight, then these organisations wouldn’t be in the sorry mess they are in now and the comms team wouldn’t be forced to use their already stretched resources and considerable nous to try and clear up the shitstorm you, O’Callaghan and Harris have created.

The entire project was just “do it on Facebook”. That’s it. Groundbreaking. The only thing you’re pissed off about is that you didn’t get your hands on all that filthy public cash. Your whole idea was laughably basic, poorly planned, even more poorly delivered and an egregious waste of public money.

Get in the bleeping bin, you butthurt has been. I hope you and your wife are reading this.
 
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As someone who has 20 years’ experience in corporate comms, I find Morter’s comments arrogant, insulting and absolutely disgusting. Myself, or anyone in my team, from comms officer upwards, certainly could have delivered such a project, better, cheaper and as part of their day job. They have the “nous”, Jon, we’ve already been doing it efficiently and quietly for years while you have been dicking about telling any poor sod who’d listen how you got some old band to number one 15 bleeping years ago. And as an ex-Head of Comms, and the ultimate guardian (and buck carrier) for the organisation’s reputation, I certainly would have demanded oversight. I wouldn’t let some arrogant little prick contractor like you on a few grand a year brush me off. The audience are taxpayers, the people who pay our wages. The comms team has a duty to its wage payers to deliver the best performing and most cost effective service it possibly can. Maybe if the comms team had been allowed oversight, then these organisations wouldn’t be in the sorry mess they are in now and the comms team wouldn’t be forced to use their already stretched resources and considerable nous to try and clear up the shitstorm you, O’Callaghan and Harris have created.

The entire project was just “do it on Facebook”. That’s it. Groundbreaking. The only thing you’re pissed off about is that you didn’t get your hands on all that filthy public cash. Your whole idea was laughably basic, poorly planned, even more poorly delivered and an egregious waste of public money.

Get in the bleeping bin, you butthurt has been. I hope you and your wife are reading this.

👏👏👏

I don't know why people seem to think that people working within the public sector are a bunch of dullards.

Maybe they hadn't done what you did because setting up a bunch of pages to amplify each others' posts in some sort of Zuckerberg-pocket-lining ouroboros isn't the best use of public funds or the best comms strategy? Or maybe they were busy getting on with actual comms and not faffing about thinking up anthropomorphic seagulls and bins

"I'd have told them to do one", well, you'd have probably been out on your arse then, wouldn't you
 
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👏👏👏

I don't know why people seem to think that people working within the public sector are a bunch of dullards.

Maybe they hadn't done what you did because setting up a bunch of pages to amplify each others' posts in some sort of Zuckerberg-pocket-lining ouroboros isn't the best use of public funds or the best comms strategy? Or maybe they were busy getting on with actual comms and not faffing about thinking up anthropomorphic seagulls and bins

"I'd have told them to do one", well, you'd have probably been out on your arse then, wouldn't you
People who work in Comms for Local Government have got things like “contracts” requiring them not to bring the Council into disrepute or to be inclusive and not to discriminate. So yeah, the in-house teams would never have produced this offensive content.

Jon Morter confirming the work was outsourced, there. Cheers Jon, look forward to seeing the tendering process, equalities impact statement, etc etc.
 
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one of the other Power Admins must still have hold of the Twitter account, there's not been a peep about it over on Facebook?

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Sorry to vent, but as someone who was regularly working 14 hour days throughout the pandemic in corporate comms for little money and even smaller thanks, stupid, condescending and ill-informed comments like Morter’s come as a kick in the teeth.

No, we didn’t spend time setting up separate FB accounts. There was no reason why we would. As THE trusted source of information within our jurisdiction, with six figure followings on each of our channels (note to Morter: not just Facebook), the public were looking to us to issue responsible, timely and accurate information to keep themselves and their loved ones safe. Added to this was internally communicating to a workforce spread across several counties working at the coal face to guidelines which changed frequently, sometimes on a daily basis, and engaging with government departments and public and voluntary sector partners to ensure a joined up approach.

As Head of Comms, if someone had shown me this idiotic “proposal”, I’d have laughed and asked for a couple of extra comms officers on rolling six month contracts to work in-house instead to reduce the workload of my existing team, who were working all hours god sends, dealing with pandemic comms and their bloody day jobs as well (most of them on 24 hour call at weekends/out of hours too). The extra comms officers would probably have cost c£40k each per year. Instead, for £500k Essex got this gurning prat sitting in his underpants firing out a couple of posts a day with some crappy Canva artwork, while some other tosser bleated, “But it was all my ideeeaaaa”.

duck off Jon Morter. No wonder you’ve never had a job in corporate comms. Not enough “nous”.
 
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What is going on with his arms? They are so weird. He looks like an action figure that's had the arms plugged in on the wrong side and backwards. Plus he really can't stand like a human.

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I put a bit of the Essex Council meeting on in the background while I was doing other stuff. It's just before the 1 hour 25 mark that use your head and spread is brought up and you hear a woman there react in horror. And rightly so.

The guy that's going through the details of the various facebook groups says it's come to his attention that comments have been disabled on the video and he thinks unless there's a very good reason for this to have been done then they need to be turned back on.

Some of the statistics on the groups are crazy. Essex is Smoke free for example had 174 followers, zero engagement and for that Harris was paid 5 grand. Then there was Essex Supports Veterans which had 189 followers, almost zero engagement and they paid out £15,100 on that one split between Harris and some other bloke. The other guy got £100 while Fatty pocketed the remaining 15 grand. Truly unbelievable.
 
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Either he’s wearing shape wear or he’s messed with the portrait mode on his phone.
 
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