That's hysterical!
I'm a bit obsessed with these desperate Instagram attempts to add character to new build properties at the moment.
We're in the process of moving to a property that was probably built around the same time as Sarah's. The village we're moving to is full of listed chocolate box cottages, which are so picturesque from the outside, but just don't fit my lifestyle or 6'4" husband.
Our new house might not have a fireplace, bay windows, or stained glass. But what our newer house lacks in character, it makes up for in practicality - it has a double garage, a lovely ensuite, and great open plan living space with bifold doors to the garden.
You can't make a new build look like a period property with strange paneling and a fake chimney breast - just embrace it for what it is!