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DipsyDoodle

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Another cracking thread title from @Lucyinthesky88 , which I had to edit for length. The full version was:

Who’s that with the turned-in toes?
Somebody has learnt how to pose.
Could it be Rach with her stolen dosh?
Don’t be silly - it’s Instabitch Josh.

We're gifting you a cancelled holiday in notSpain and a career break so you can dry hump your significant other in front of a mirror all afternoon 💜

Last thread recap:
- Reacharoundio is, as always, a cunt.
- she doesn't work either full or part time, and can't be arsed to parent her kids and step kids.
- a new day, a new bout of oversharing from BV Barbara. She's revealed that Seb has suffered from cystitis twice in the last 6 months. The stepson who is only 16, and already had the fact that he'd gone to the sexual health clinic broadcast on her public Instagram. If only Gucci Glenda didn't feel the need to sell out the privacy of children in her care for likes and attention online 😬
- she has also apparently not come on her period. But seeing as she is always on or just about to be on, is she just trying to get speculation going that the next cash cow may be on the way? I bet the tight circle of seventy billion trusted babysitters are crossing their fingers, toes and eyes that it's just late coming.
- oversharing Olive was at A&E for her own bout of cystitis, but despite her being so unwell she had to attend A&E, she bravely managed to piss about on her phone doing a q&a on Instagram. What a trooper! There was some rambling about why Wilbert has her surname and not Hot Pant Harry's (because none of her other kids has it), they're paying for a private diagnosis for Lula, but it's ok because Splash the Cash Sharon ran into an Educational Therapist (sure you did , hun) who told her she's doing all the poor people (the ones who eat egg and chips for tea and don't have named trainers) a massive favour because it's freeing up a place on the NHS waiting list for someone else. What a hero! Someone asked about notBarbados and she wrote a long, rambling answer which barely mentioned the actual holiday, just wanged on and on about how her and Roast Dinner Rick love each other the hardest, and more so when they haven't got the kids around. Wilbur is starting nursery in September, just 3 months after Merlot Malcolm started his career break, to *checks notes* look after Wilbur 🧐
- it was noted by Tattlers that her visit to the hospital was after she had been swimming, which begs the question of whether she was really ill enough to warrant a visit to A&E, considering that cystitis isn't generally either an accident or an emergency, and if it is bad enough to warrant a hospital visit, stopping off to go swimming beforehand isn't usually on the list of priorities 🤷
- Career Break Colin has been making excellent use of his time at home by taking photos of himself with his new £140 bum bag in the giant mirror and getting them reposted by the company. Never mind that short fella that he's meant to be looking after, dressing up like something out of Dora the Explorer and posing is far more important.
- Weeping Wendy shared a video of herself bawling her eyes out from 2019, with not a lot of explanation. Tattle detectives could give MI5 a run for the money, as it was quickly noted that it would have been filmed around the time Stabby Jo's boyfriend stabbed someone (and then they went to the Patchwork horror house for shelter). Was she being trolled? Or just worried about implications for Titwank Terry's career having harboured the perpetrator of a potentially fatal stabbing?
- apparently now Vagina Vera is passing blood clots. Thanks for sharing, hun. Although knowing how dramatic she can be, it's probably just the period that came a few days late 🤷
- A snippet from what appears to be Clotty Claire's new book shows her talking about Wilby's diagnosis, how it made her feel, and likening it to going for a pregnancy scan and being told there's no heartbeat. How lush for Wilbur to read when he's older, that his diagnosis (that she paid for) was compared to losing an unborn child.
- in a serious dose of karma, the Big Family Holiday to Portugal (which isn't in Spain) is all off. Tattlers everywhere spat out their fizzy cat's piss and danced around in their Sheepers in delight, as karma finally appeared to bite Oh Are We Olivia on her arse. Ratshit said she'd booked a villa through "someone who messaged her on Instagram", who has now come back and said that as the owners have had some work done, it's going to cost twice as much, and poor old Designer Debra isn't paying it. What really happened is open to speculation, with suggestions that Beggy Mitchell thought she was getting a freebie and was then expected to stump up the cash and threw her toys out of the pram over it, or that with Stabby Jo on the toxic list there was no live in babysitter coming to look after the kids while Racquetball and Sloshua love each other the hardest in notSpain, or just simply that the scammer has been scammed...
- not content with the PayPal money, the ad money, the book money, the Patreon money and the shop money, Racquetball is now on the beg for yet more dosh from the huns to do up the next Patchwork launderette. While "dripping in Gucci". Because women in crisis really care about the place looking lush and having leopard print cushions, don't they? This time it's a "fun day", for a measly £5 a person to get in, with various stalls and activities inside, all raising cash for the Patchwork shit show.
- Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber took time out from their busy schedules to film themselves dry-humping on the chair in front of the giant mirror. I bet Rawhide's various employees (the dog walker, the cleaner, the childminder, the gardener, whoever's running the shop, launderette and packing centre) are overjoyed that their boss is SO BUSY SAVING LIVES that she's paying them to cover every aspect of her life while she loves Stone Island Steve the hardest ever on a weekday afternoon.
- Freebie Freda has been busy making up "lucky dip" packs that will be available to buy at the Patchwork Fun Day, only £5 and you will get a selection of crap, including signed books, Iconic makeup and Rescue products. Basically, all stuff that Rancid either got for free, or has been paid to advertise, and no longer wants.
- one of the very close circle of trusted babysitters (all twelve million of them) has taken Wobbler out to a supermarket. Which he loved! How is it that any old stranger manages to do these things with him, when Ratchet and Sloshy can't get out of the house without getting headbutted? I mean, it couldn't POSSIBLY be that Gold Bath Gloria is exaggerating his behaviour for sympathy, could it? 🧐
- speaking of the gold bath, Period Pants Pamela hasn't yet said that she's splashed what she could have spent on a boob job on one, but she has said that she needs a hot water supply to the toilet so that she can have the sprayer attachment for her grubby arsehole. It's a bit harsh really, surely Titwank Tony is big enough to shower himself 🤷
- The Patchwork Shit show empire is getting yet another accountant, looks like Sweaty Betty's brother has been flung on the "toxic" pile with anyone else who's ever tried to call Queen Lateetha out on her behaviour. Maybe he has discovered where the PayPal dosh really went, and wants no part of it. Anyway, PA Jo is meeting with the new one, because she controls all the money, and poor little Turned in Toes Tessie doesn't understand taxes and stuff. She possibly doesn't realise that "I don't understand it, Jo looks after all of that" will not really cut it with HMRC when they come a-knocking, seeing as she is listed as a director of the company.
- turns out the accountant (Sweaty Betty's brother) has had a breakdown and pissed off to Vegas. So first the accounts were late being filed, and she's now changed accountants twice in a very short span of time. Maybe the next Wilbur inspired jumper should say "red flag"?
- Racket and Five Grand Watch Fred are heading off to London for a very important work meeting. Which you would have thought strong, independent Rango, who used to spend her time driving through the night to rescue women from abusive homes, would be able to attend on her own. But no, Norman Noballs has to attend, in case he accidentally puts his pecker into someone else's nesting box 🤮 meanwhile, Gangsta Granny is holding the fort, with a text exchange with Rambo stating that Tallulah is "really upset" and "not herself at the minute". Which begs the question, why do two adults, neither of which have an actual job to go to, feel the need to piss off to London and leave her with Granny, for no good reason other than they love each other the hardest and want to drink fizzy cat's piss and pretend they're having a one night stand without having to bother parenting the many children they created and/or stole? Remember guys, Sloshy's career break was to "spend more time with the kids", wouldn't this have been a perfect opportunity to be a stepdad worth having? 🤷
- while Lula's having problems at school and having to be picked up by Gangster Granny, #parentsoftheyear have been shagging all afternoon in the hotel 🤮🤮🤮 and even managed to fit in a shopping trip. I'm sure all her followers who have children with ASD can totally relate 🙄




If you are new, please read the wiki (pink button at the top) and if you are in need of support or advice in relation to domestic abuse, there are some links and helplines listed at the bottom of the wiki page
 
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Dorothy-redshoes

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“Oh are we Olivia” 😂😂😂. @DipsyDoodle these nicknames need to be recorded in full for the Wiki.

I take it that her new contract is for sex toys then? No wonder Slosh went to the meeting 🤢🤢. Either that or they are so desperate, they have to cart sex aids from Devon to London just for one decent bunk up (both scenarios are far to tragic for a Friday morning, I have headache already 🤦🏻‍♀️.)

She looks manic in that content from last night. When she started talking about sex, he stepped away from her like she’d shit on him. All is not well there.
Imagine only having sex with your husband because a company has paid you 😆😆

Poor thing had to go all the way to London to shop at JD sports, shame there isn't already one in Torquay.
View attachment 1382933
She looks like a fucking referee or someone who works in foot locker 😆
 
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Lucyinthesky88

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You’ve kicked her out for longer needs to be worked into the next thread title 😂

Also I hope #Betsysick isn’t the next jumper release 🙈
BeKind is off travelling with Mummy’s stolen wonga;
Rach won’t miss her for six months - she’s kicked her out for longer.

🤣
 
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armywife119

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Imagine you have a tenner left in your purse but want to do something fun for your child. You go to the ‘charity’ fun 🙄 day. You think £5 is going to help women affected by DA. Spend the other fiver on face painting etc safe in the knowledge you’re helping a good cause.

Imagine then you discovered 0.05p went to the non charity the rest went to Reptile and her friends. the one that can afford Gucci, 5 grand watch, and designer trainers for her 2 year old.
Honestly Id rather give all my money to the man who messaged me from Nigeria this morning.
 
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DipsyDoodle

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Is it just me that finds it really shitty that Gangsta Gran is having to deal with all this? While I'm sure she has some affection for Tallulah as her step grandchild, it's not really her problem is it? We've never been really shown her and T together before so I can't imagine they're really that close for Josh's mum to be able to support her well if she is really struggling.
I am of the opinion that most people shouldn't expect grandparents to pick up this much of the parenting. She's had her time bringing up kids and teenagers, her own kids are grown up now, yes she can support and love them, but at her age she shouldn't be picking up a teenager from school because the parent and step parent are off in London shopping and having an afternoon sex session. If they were both genuinely working and unable to collect a child, of course a grandparent can help out if they're able. But Thrushy Thelma attended one meeting (which could have been done virtually), and used it as an excuse to have yet another night away with Tic Tac Teeth Terry. Even if she had to attend the meeting in person, if she had time to be shopping and getting her big bag of sex toys out, then she could easily have caught a train home and been with her daughter. I thought the whole "part time working mummy" brand was based on her deciding to reduce her hours at work to spend more time with her kids, these days she spends less time with them than she probably ever did when she had a real job 🤷

Two weeks since Career Break Colin jacked in work, and that's 2 mid week, term time breaks so far. Her followers really are thick as shit if they believe that he's given up work to spend more time with the kids.
 
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Dorothy-redshoes

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So, they laughed at him when he suggested he wanted to become a chef,
They laughed at him when he said he wanted to be a carpenter,
And now they are just taking the piss out of him and forcing him to do things he clearly doesn't want to do, just for laughs!
Parents of the year right there!!!
I don't agree with how seb spoke in that text message but tbh, I can't blame him, he puts up with loads of shit from those 2 idiots. They ridiculed him when he broke his fingers, they ignored him when he broke his arm, they publicly announce his sexual health issues, on a few occasions he's put himself in front of an unpredictable R/josh and Wilby, hes removed Wilby from situations that wernt great, he probably protects I too, hes had crap in regards to his mother and father splitting up, hes had to adjust from going from 2 parents and 1 brother, to instantly a stepmother and 3 other kids all wanting attention. No wonder he speaks to his dad like that and is struggling in life right now! Poor kid.
 
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FridaK

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So I have it on good authority that her latest paetron live shows her admitting thar S had his first joint at 13 and now regularly smokes weed one every month or six weeks, with her full knowledge. She tells him not to ride his moped if he's planning on having a joint with his mates. He also knows to ring her and either stay with his mates or at mummy Marshall's.
Sebs a little shit frankly. He has done fuck all with school, arsed ended his exams, allegedly turns up at his Nans house stoned (the audacity of that.) Plus he is now supposedly rolling round to his mates house stinking of weed. The kid does not know he his born. If he was one of mine the moped would be in the sea even before id got round to telling their Dads. But then I’m not trying to be popular or scared of my own kids. Little twits today thinking they are Tupac because their Mums gave them £20 to but a Balaclava from JD Sports 😬😬😬.

Also I know it goes against the grain, but the kid is 16. If he can comfortably break the law with drugs, he is more than capable of seeing his Mum if he wanted to. As I said, he’s a little shit 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Top tier parenting and indeed policing from Josh though 🤨
 
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MummaNoggins

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That household is chaotic (and I don't mean the shit renovations)
There's no routine. Kids come and go as they please. And 9/10 they don't know who's in the house.
Random adults having breakfast, drinking, dropping in. Safeguarding much.
Cctv watching every move and private clips posted on the Internet.
Kids left to fend for themselves once they're out of nappies.
Private conversations and recordings shared for all to see. That's a huge 🚩🚩.
Kids ignore until she's paid to wheel them out for paid content.
A completely unequal distribution of love/time/effort between the kids.
Kids pitted against each other for parental love.
Honestly I could go on and on.
She may not live in poverty on a shitty council estate. She may have money and a flash car but those kids are neglected in many ways.
The emotional neglect will haunt them for years.

RaquetBall.. I know you're reading 👋 👋. Sort your fucking selves out. You are both disgusting. Those poor poor kids.
 
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Dorothy-redshoes

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Parent of the year.....
Seb has been smoking drugs since the age of 13 and has visited a sexual health clinic.
Betsy has been sleeping around with random men every weekend, drinks underage, drives dangerously and has alledgly done drugs.
Tallulah stays out until midnight and brings people back to her sisters room, has previously not come home due to staying round her boyfriends for days on end.
Isaac puffs on vapes and stays out until midnight also bringing people home to his sisters room.
Rach never knows who is in her home at any one time and doesn't know where any of her kids are or are staying at any given time.
Wilby is let loose playing in pissy toilets, eating firelighters, smashing a glass fire, spills water near an active plug socket, is left unattended with wires, is left unattended with 2 dogs, is left unattended eating, smears shit all over the living room.
Edie has previously played Internet games with strangers, one being a man and dresses like an 18 year old.
🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
Yeah, shes such a great parent 👏
 
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goaldigger

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Parent of the year.....
Seb has been smoking drugs since the age of 13 and has visited a sexual health clinic.
Betsy has been sleeping around with random men every weekend, drinks underage, drives dangerously and has alledgly done drugs.
Tallulah stays out until midnight and brings people back to her sisters room, has previously not come home due to staying round her boyfriends for days on end.
Isaac puffs on vapes and stays out until midnight also bringing people home to his sisters room.
Rach never knows who is in her home at any one time and doesn't know where any of her kids are or are staying at any given time.
Wilby is let loose playing in pissy toilets, eating firelighters, smashing a glass fire, spills water near an active plug socket, is left unattended with wires, is left unattended with 2 dogs, is left unattended eating, smears shit all over the living room.
Edie has previously played Internet games with strangers, one being a man and dresses like an 18 year old.
🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
Yeah, shes such a great parent 👏
Now change certain aspects - mum doesn't work, dad is unemployed, they live in an overcrowded house on a local estate, youngest child is palmed off to the neighbours/friends all the time so mum and dad can go to the pub.
No-one would bat an eyelid at SS involvement 🤷‍♀️
 
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armywife119

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When I reported her to ASA I included the bit where she puts #notanaddickhead. I stated how it upset my very sensitive nature and offended me greatly.
#rachisashitcuntfuckinglyingwhorebag.
 
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FridaK

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I can’t find the words
I’ve got this 🙋🏻‍♀️.

Edie your holiday got cancelled because when the invoice came, mummy, Aunty Jo and Aunty Emily realised that they hadn’t been doing their quick maths correctly, so mummy couldn’t pay for you all to go. Now a man called Rishi S from London is asking Mummy for lots of money that she owes the country. She has to pay it or she’ll go to prison. So no holidays for you this year. Mummy and that bloke she makes you call Daddy (the one who is not your Daddy,) will have a breaks away (if Spotlight pay for the hotel,) So no need to panic, you little glitter ball”
 
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MummaNoggins

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Is Astrid trolling Raq 🤣View attachment 1395767

Raq will probably use this excuse for the silence on her pages 🤷‍♀️View attachment 1395818
Well fook me sideways. Who on earth does KDIL think she is?! 😅
Does she seriously and honestly think that Biden and the other world leaders will have a radical re-think of all that's shit about the world. Just because some grubby woman from Blighty refrained from flashing her gash for one day?!
Worlds gone mad 😶
 
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MummaNoggins

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Howling at the thought of them at Stacey Solomon's wedding.
Pissed up on the free bar. Angling closer and closer to Hinch who'd be clutching Ronnie (Reggie?!) And looking terrified.
Josh would have Joe cornered (Swash and Slosh 😉). He's be drunkenly chewing his ear off about the lesser spotted Devon Great Tit (the feathered type, Not his beloved).
She'd interrupt the speeches with her tales of woe, needles, abandonment and piss filled bedsits.
Wobble would be plugged into his Ipad, treating the whole congregation to Peppa Pig as they said their vows.
Obviously the others would be left at home to eat stale bread and drink toilet water.
Joe and Stacey would look on in horror as Devon's finest chavs gorged themselves on the buffet and stumbled drunkenly across the dance floor, loving each other the very hardest ever 💜💜.
It'd be beautiful and lush and amazing. I'd definitely buy the copy of OK magazine that it was featured in 😅
 
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ClArt20138

Well-known member
I feel so sorry for Tallulah today. Imagine needing your Mum and looking at her social media to find that instead of being at a super important meeting, she's actually just been bumping uglies with Ugly Bumpkin? On the plus side T, you'll have plenty of collateral to publish your very own Sunday Times Bestseller in a few years about how your Mum really DID abandon you. In all seriousness, that poor young girl is navigating some difficult times without any real support from her Mum. I hope she has some other support elsewhere.
 
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sallycinnamon84

Chatty Member
All her patchwork friends/employees are complicit in her toxic behaviour. No one ever calls her out. Arseteroid invites her for dinner, waiting on her hand and foot 🤢 after a 2 night break from her kids, two or which have extra needs. Everyone round her just babys and mollicoddles her, yuk. Its all just so abnormal. Who has there (another) best friends dad round for breakfast?! Shes just bizarre. I hope that T can get to see her Step sisters. That girl needs some love and attention and some safe space away from her narcissist mother. I remember feeling so lost and alone at that age. I literally used to sit and cry whilst my mum was getting dolled up to go out drinking, again. I would'nt even get a glance from her. I was left to babysitter my 3 younger siblings not knowing when or if she would come home until the early hours. I can see so much of my own mother in R. Complete disregard for anyone else's needs its me, me, me. I left home at 15 after having some sort of nervous breakdown.
 
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I’m not a mother, I’ve chosen not to have children because I enjoy a child free life (so don’t have kids to put to bed 😉), I don’t even really know why I follow this thread because the fml I have children stories annoy the fuck out of me! But I am a stepmother and it’s been tough at times, but I do all I can to be supportive to the child and wider family on a whole. I’ve always said there will be a come back for these parents putting their children’s lives on social media one day, and this is a prime example! I’ve had friends share photos of their children in a paddling pool naked etc and it astounds me how naïve they can be. I can’t imagine everything in your teenage years being shared to thousands, and surely, really as a parent you couldn’t see that?? Would you really want strangers knowing your children’s whole life stories while they are still trying to navigate life and peer pressure, and growing!
sorry for the rant, I know it’s been said before, I just needed to offload with this fuckwit that thinks this is ok… there needs to be change for childrens protection sakes!! I’ll crawl back into my lurking hole now 🙃
 
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