Pregnancy #62
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I remember you from being on here with my first in 2021 were you pregnant with your first then?! I lived in the US at the time and refused to get cervical checks from 36 weeks. Eventually let her at 39 and she gave me a sweep without even asking. I had a weird almost backwards labour in the end and I always wonder if that was why. Luckily she wasn’t too pushy about induction until 41 weeks. The hospitals there are bloody amazing though!!It absolutely boggles my mind.
I was talking to someone at a baby store the other day who told me it was "better for the baby" to be induced and her doctor had advised her not to go to 40 weeks, but even just the tests they have - the same woman was amazing I hadn't had a glucose test and asked me why I would go against medical advice when I didn't go to medical school (And yes, yes I really did take great pleasure in informing her that I indeed did go to medical school and was a doctor)
It's scary. I think the US mortality rate is about 21/100000 compared to 9/100000 I think in the UK. I understand the need for induction, c-sections, forceps and even the right to choose if that is what you want, but pregnancy is the most natural thing in the world and that has definitely been lost in the US.
I already have 2 healthy girls, both born at 36 weeks after short labours (with one surprising us at home very quickly). Like you said, you're almost 41 weeks, as long as you and baby are safe (and unless its what you wanted) why would you add in more procedures and medications than needed.
(Yes, I am rambling but it's 3.30am baby 3 has decided my ribs are the best toy every and E2 has decided she absolutely cannot sleep unless she is next to daddy laying like a starfish so no sleep for me!
I was! That was when I was pregnant with Elanna.
I would have been fuming if that was me. I don’t understand how she thought she had the right to do that - especially in the US where they sue for everything! I do think trying to push your body into labour if it’s not ready (and there’s no medical reason) can throw off your labour so it could be the cause for you.
The hospitals are amazing, you’re right about that. I’m not 100% sold on using them yet though. We had a spontaneous home birth with number 2 so I think we’ll go for the same again.
Wow congrats on being on number 3 I’m only just ready for 2!
shouldve sued her I’d be rich now 
. Yes good idea it’s just so weird there and not like here how you can go to the midwife unit the majority of the time but you would actually need to go out of your way to find your own midwife / birthing unit and I don’t even know how that would’ve worked with insurance. I definitely didn’t know anyone who did it. All straight to the hospital epiduraled up ASAP!
sooo medical over there nothing left naturally. Hoping for a different experience this time just scared of the ancient hospital and shared wards
My c section is a week today! So excited to meet my baby girl but so scared for the surgery 🫣
Yup, number 3. I blame the oldest. She lulled us into a false sense of security by being an angel. We call number 2 our Tiny Terrorist and are now just all in on the chaos so what’s adding a 3rd to that…!Wow congrats on being on number 3 I’m only just ready for 2!
It is weird here. I did look at finding a birth unit. We’re In Los Angeles and I found one birth/midwife unit that I would say is comparable to the UK all the others were a little too hippie for me
besides, our second came in 17 minutes and I don’t really want to be caught in the car on the 405!It is all medical here. It’s odd if you don’t want an epidural.
Fingers crossed you get a positive experience. I’m with you on the shared wards. I hate hospital wards.
totally agree - I hate that you either have to pay £20k to go private here or hope you can get a private room. Our hospital has them but it’s a gamble whether you get one. Seems such an added stress when the year is 2024! Also ditto with the partners having to leave. Why should I have to go through birth and then my partner has to leave and I have to lie there in pain looking after a newborn!
We went private but we were lucky as my husband did/does private work with the hospital so we didn’t end up with such a big bill. It wouldn’t take much to have all new mums in rooms but would make such a difference to them. i know the hospital I worked at in London lets you pay for a private room but I think it’s between £400 and £600 a night, which I do not agree with at all.
Also agree that your partner should be able to stay with you, especially with how stretched nurses and midwives can be and not even just to help. It’s their baby too, why should they have to be separated during such a special time.
If I continue to be a low risk pregnancy then I can give birth in my hospitals mid-wife led unit which has private rooms. But if there's complications or I want an epidural then I'd be moved to a consultant led unit and would be moved onto a ward after birth with other women. I really hope I can stay on the midwife unit and have a nice private room but who knows what will happen.
I’m the same - it’s just the mystery around it. I hate not knowing where I’ll end up, whereas in most other countries it’s just one less thing to worry about.
I can only speak for the trust I work at, we have some single bed rooms but we tend to use them if someone’s baby has gone to nicu, twins, if the woman is poorly or is under the bereavement team for previous loss, sometimes partners stay but they cannot leave the room after visiting hours. On the bays, ours have 2 beds, the window side tends to go to women who have had csections, so they can put their belongings on the window and not be having to bend down etc.
if you have a low risk birth on the birth centre then you stay in that room until discharge, on labour & delivery you transfer to postnatal ward after. Our labour rooms are quite nice though.
I was very lucky having Baby Shark, shared bay postnatal, but the other bed was empty the whole time
only annoying thing was having to leave baby in the bay and walk halfway down the corridor for the toilet.
if you have a low risk birth on the birth centre then you stay in that room until discharge, on labour & delivery you transfer to postnatal ward after. Our labour rooms are quite nice though.
I was very lucky having Baby Shark, shared bay postnatal, but the other bed was empty the whole time
only annoying thing was having to leave baby in the bay and walk halfway down the corridor for the toilet.
It’s so hard isn’t it? I obviously would have loved Mr Skates to have been able to stay, but I would have felt vulnerable and uncomfortable around strange men if other women’s partners stay. Maybe an option of a same sex birthing partner to stay would work. I was actually really lucky and was just in a shared bay with one other woman. She was lovely and we supported each other through the first night, we stayed in contact and are still friends now.
I’m nearly 35 weeks and still haven’t been told anything about the hospital or anything about my birth plan. My next midwife appointment is Tuesday so hopeful they’ll go over something then but it’s such a big unknown im slightly worried hha
im 37 weeks and I haven’t been told either. It’s only from our antenatal courses that I’m more aware. I’ve printed out the birth plan from the nhs website which looks really good!
I'm in Scotland so I have a section of my pregnancy app to fill out which my midwife and then hospital can see. Ask about it at your next appointment. Mine was brought up at my 32 week one but I'm not sure how it's done elsewhere.
At my 34 week appt they told me to go on the NHS website and have a look at the template birth plan - I would recommend that but there are also others online which are helpful. They also told me to look up my maternity hospital and read about the different wards as there is a maternity ward and labour ward which provide different services depending on what type of birth you want. So I would recommend researching that too for your own hospital.
It was then discussed at my 36 week appt. Definitely bring it up at your next appt!
This is exactly the same for me. Really hoping I can do it all at my chosen community maternity unit and be in a private room the whole way through. I don’t relish the idea of being on a ward after being tore up from the floor up.
Also from your posts and also being in Scotland, I feel like we’re talking about the same hospital.
Had my follow up scan today. Everything is looking good and got to see the heartbeat. It's grown so much in 10 days!
Ours lets one birthing partner stay with you the whole time but they can’t come and go 9pm-9am (I think those times) and they don’t get fed, can’t shower etc.
My mum came up for visiting hours but they weren’t strict about her leaving at all.
Initially I was in the bay (of 6) where the window was to the inside and it happened to be the nurses station but when one became empty next to the outside window I asked if I could move as we potentially had a long stay and they obliged, no questions.
Re birthing plan it’s really down to you the midwife can help explain the options. You’ll decide things like what, if any, pain relief you’d like, if you’d want to be cut or tear naturally should it arise, if you want music & lighting, how much assistance, partners role, vitamin K, partner to cut the cord, skin to skin/placed directly into you before baby is cleaned up, delayed cord clamping and so on. It’s all just preferences of course and if you’re unsure you can just say you want to go with the flow.
Our midwife led unit is opposite the delivery suite so it’s a quick switch if needed, I believe that’s common. You can’t have epidural and water for instance but you can start in the water and change your mind, nothing is set in stone unless it’s too late/contraindicated.
To give an idea, the month my oldest was born, and it was Covid but it’s usually similar, there were 313 delivery suite and 49 midwife led (18 at home) which I found surprising as it was sort of implied midwife led was very common. 40% were CS split almost evenly between ECS and planned. 10% of vaginal births were assisted, 34% inductions.
My mum came up for visiting hours but they weren’t strict about her leaving at all.
Initially I was in the bay (of 6) where the window was to the inside and it happened to be the nurses station but when one became empty next to the outside window I asked if I could move as we potentially had a long stay and they obliged, no questions.
Re birthing plan it’s really down to you the midwife can help explain the options. You’ll decide things like what, if any, pain relief you’d like, if you’d want to be cut or tear naturally should it arise, if you want music & lighting, how much assistance, partners role, vitamin K, partner to cut the cord, skin to skin/placed directly into you before baby is cleaned up, delayed cord clamping and so on. It’s all just preferences of course and if you’re unsure you can just say you want to go with the flow.
Our midwife led unit is opposite the delivery suite so it’s a quick switch if needed, I believe that’s common. You can’t have epidural and water for instance but you can start in the water and change your mind, nothing is set in stone unless it’s too late/contraindicated.
To give an idea, the month my oldest was born, and it was Covid but it’s usually similar, there were 313 delivery suite and 49 midwife led (18 at home) which I found surprising as it was sort of implied midwife led was very common. 40% were CS split almost evenly between ECS and planned. 10% of vaginal births were assisted, 34% inductions.
I was on a shared ward after my section but my hospital allowed partners to stay overnight. (No beds or anything but they weren’t kicked out).
I honestly wouldn’t have coped if he wasn’t there, I couldn’t move until after my catheter was removed at about 11pm and then after that I was incredibly weak and unsteady due to losing a fair amount of blood.
Any time I called for a midwife for pain relief etc it took between 10-30mins for them to come and then half the time I was told no one available to help right now.
If our hospital allowed it I would have paid anything for a private room!
I honestly wouldn’t have coped if he wasn’t there, I couldn’t move until after my catheter was removed at about 11pm and then after that I was incredibly weak and unsteady due to losing a fair amount of blood.
Any time I called for a midwife for pain relief etc it took between 10-30mins for them to come and then half the time I was told no one available to help right now.
If our hospital allowed it I would have paid anything for a private room!
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