I’m finding a lot of the comments on this thread quite hard to read. Whether you like Philip or not, coming out as gay at the age of 57 IS a brave thing to do. Homophobia is sadly still rife, even in this day and age. I know, first hand, the effects of keeping a ‘secret’ like this can do to someone. It eats away, slowly chipping away at you until it takes you to the brink. But telling the truth and being who you truly are is sometimes too much for some people, largely due to the reactions of others. Some comments saying ‘oh he’ll be on dancing on ice next year’ and ‘ Philip and Rylan will be best mates etc’ WHY???? because he’s gay??? FFS this narrow minded ignorance is why people find it so hard to be honest. And has anyone thought maybe he’s difficult to work with because he’s been carrying this for years?
So does being bullied in the workplace.
I was born in the 1970's, grew up in the 1980's. My mum has worked in the NHS for most of my life and had gay male hairdressers (one who gave me my first job as a Saturday girl after the six hours he spent on my spiral perm
) so I've always been around gay people, some incredibly out and camp even back then. So I have to admit I'm struggling with this "it was hard coming out in the 1990's, the world was a different place" blah blah blah when, having lived through it, I don't feel it. That said, I've never had to come out.
I think Phil has always known he was gay but tried to convince himself he was in love with a woman. Wouldn't be the first and certainly won't be the last. It's always sad when someone feels they have to live in a lie but, unfortunately, there will always be bigots in this world. Personally, I don't care who you shag as long as it makes you happy, it's legal and you're not ruining someone else's life in the process. You get one life - it's too short to be unhappy and not be your true self. I have always said that. I believe him when he says they love each other very much and I don't think their marriage has been a "waste" and I sincerely hope Steph doesn't either. I suspect she's always known deep down and that there has been an agreement of some kind.
When I was 18, I went out with someone who I suspected was gay - he was pretty camp and really wasn't interested in me sexually (to be honest, I had vaginismus so it was a relief but he wasn't interested in doing other stuff either) - and my mum certainly did too as she made no bones about telling me when I told her we'd split up
In his case, he'd just reconnected with his dad after a long period of estrangement. His dad was a real womaniser - was very flirty with me - and I think he just couldn't admit it, even to himself. He had a very out and proud gay friend who I bumped into years later - he was the one who told me he'd come out. He thought I'd be upset but it was the least surprising news ever.
I haven't seen any what I would consider homophobia on here but, again, I'm not gay so
I am disabled though and don't have a problem with disabled jokes as long as they're not malicious. And I haven't seen a malicious comment on here - just a bit of leg pulling. Nothing that I would consider crossing a line. However, I appreciate maybe that's something I need to think more about.
hugged Holly.
