Parents of teenagers!

[or JusRollWithIt]

Just a bit of levity during this difficult time

 

[restingbtcface]

Teenagers are vile why didn’t anybody warn me

 

[N0s3yr0s3y]

Saw this thread title & had to pop my head in, I feel for you all now I’m on the other side of it, my eldest 2 are now 22 & 24.
I remember thinking when they were teenagers that I’d go back to the sleepless newborn stage or terrible twos in a flash because the teenage years are testing to say the least.
Pick your battles & try to keep communication open, they’re just stuck at a tricky age between being a kid & becoming adults full of raging hormones.
Mine are the loveliest adults now & we can laugh at some of the shit that went down years ago when they were tipping me over the edge. I wasn’t the easiest teenager & I feel bad for my dad when I think back.
I’ve got it all to come again as my youngest is 8 🫣

 

[Dizzy]

I actually expect them to leave the house at some point . We all went out as a family last Sunday , they wanted to come because we went for ice cream and they've only left the house once these week and that was to buy a bottle of pop.

I would expect an 18 year old with no commitments to go out more frequently. I would expect them to sometimes go to pub at that age . And there's always cafes or the gym .

The other teenagers I know don't seem to be so reclusive. That's why I was asking other people what their experiences were.

Have you asked why your teen doesnt want to go out? Are there any other underlying issues ie, anxiety, friendship issues etc? I would say that everyone is different and if your teen is happy hanging out at home then what’s the problem. Obviously they should be pitching in with chores around the house etc but expecting someone to do something just because other people of that age do it is misguided.

 

[Bubbledoggyyeah]

This is part rant, part wondering if anyone else has a similar experience.

My 18 year old has just done their a levels and finished school . They are in the house all of the time and never do anything or go out . Them being in the house all the time is getting on my nerves a bit now as they often seem to be in the way .
They've been applying for jobs , but haven't had any success. I've suggested volunteering at a charity shop to gain experience but nothing has come of it.

They also have skin issues that is trying to be sorted medically , which doesn't help their confidence and I can't help but think people are judgemental about.

I think back to when I was 18 and I was so much more independent.

Roll on September when they go to college.

I’m not sure where you’re actually expecting them to be? They’ve applied for jobs but had no success. Yes they could volunteer as you say, but if they have a skin issue I would imagine they’re feeling insecure. And A-Levels really didn’t finish all that long ago, allow them some grace.

Where else are you actually expecting them to be rather than at home? Sat outside on the street?

 

[Dizzy]

Teenagers are pricks! Mine are selfish, unpredictable, messy and lazy - but they’re also very funny, clever, silly, loving (sometimes!) and great company. I’m enjoying seeing them change into adults and whilst they vex me on nearly hourly basis some days, I try not to stress the small stuff and think back to how I was when I was a teen I try and be what they need me to be - sometimes it’s someone to hug them, sometimes it’s to offer guidance, sometimes it’s to remind them that they’re being a dickhead

 

[Megansnarkle]

I asked and they said that they do go out . They dont think it's an issue to not go out for days on end. They've met with a friend this week.

Maybe they're just a house cat. I'm a bit the same. I don't need to be around people all the time and I'm quite happy when alone at home just doing my thing.

 

[Cucumber and eggs]

I have a 15 year old. Have had a lot of trouble with her violence and aggression, she can be quite narcissistic, manipulative, self centred and entitled. She very rarely goes to school, can be violent and aggressive to the point I've called the police out on her several times. Her younger sisters were put on child protection register due to the risk of domestic abuse from eldest daughter. She doesn't care, has very little empathy and will only apologise If she gets something in return or if its too benefit her. Waiting for camhs to hopefully give a diagnosis or medicate her tbh. She is very close to going in to care. She sleeps all day and awake all night, isolates herself in her room on her phone alot. Does have friends but struggles to maintain long last friendships. Just don't know what else to do with her

 

[atomic]

I have no advice to give as I am not a parent, but I will say that I was an absolute lunatic between the ages of 13 and 17. My mum and I had the worst relationship and I am fully aware it was entirely my fault because I was such a little bitch. We are the best of friends now. It does get better, I promise you! Your unruly teens will likely come to their senses and realise how awful they have been. I feel so guilty now that I was so awful to my poor mum!!

 

[Kim Mild]

I’m not sure where you’re actually expecting them to be? They’ve applied for jobs but had no success. Yes they could volunteer as you say, but if they have a skin issue I would imagine they’re feeling insecure. And A-Levels really didn’t finish all that long ago, allow them some grace.

Where else are you actually expecting them to be rather than at home? Sat outside on the street?

I actually expect them to leave the house at some point . We all went out as a family last Sunday , they wanted to come because we went for ice cream and they've only left the house once these week and that was to buy a bottle of pop.

I would expect an 18 year old with no commitments to go out more frequently. I would expect them to sometimes go to pub at that age . And there's always cafes or the gym .

The other teenagers I know don't seem to be so reclusive. That's why I was asking other people what their experiences were.

 

[Rocknrolla]

My son looks at me like he despises every single word what comes out of my mouth, I know the look well because I remember feeling the exact same way about my mum. Oh karma

 

[restingbtcface]

My daughter is 13 and lovely but absolutely addicted to her phone.

It’s not good is it. When I was 13 I was into magazines and Take That. I know it’s a different time now but it makes me sad

 

[philopastry75]

I’ve found my thread . My 15 year old is actually ok but definitely addicted to his PlayStation but his 13 year old sibling is really pushing every button.

Teenagers are way worse than toddlers!!

 

[Dizzy]

Not trying to downplay parenting teenagers because FML it really is the most testing of times but parenting a neurodiverse teenager is a whole fresh circle of hell

 

[mozzarellagirl]

Do any of you examine your own behaviours and how you interact and speak to your teens? It might give insight into why SOME of you have teens that don't want to engage with you and seem to "ruin" holidays and be "arseholes".

 

[Dizzy]

My 13 year old is always in her room on her phone. I can entice her out with food or to bake. She'll come and watch a quiz show with me as she likes them. But apart from that she just wants to go in her room on her phone. I dont know what to do or is that normal?

Sadly, yes I think it is for many teenagers. Mine are addicted to their phones, drives me mental.

 

[Megansnarkle]

I’m at my whits end, just had a phone call from the school to say another parent has called up concerned about her daughter’s behaviour and while checking her phone is now concerned about my daughter. She’s Up sending messages until all hours of the night, screen shotting pornographic images off websites and sending them, there was also a video over the weekend of my daughter smoking (unsure if it was a vape or an actual cigarette) but she’s out of control. Feel like I can’t take her phone, as I work full time and she’s responsible for getting herself to and from school (I don’t get home until after 6) feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place and it’s making me so unhappy. I’m fed up of her attitude, her entitlement, her behaviour - everything is determined about how she feels and I’m sick of walking on eggshells because of her. If anyone could help or offer an advi ce I’d much appreciate it

It doesn't address the root behaviour but at least take her phone away overnight.

 

[Summer2011]

Think I’ve finally found my page my daughter has just turned 12 and is making my actual life hell. This is worse than the baby days - I honestly can’t believe nobody warned me about how horrible it is & I also can’t believe some people go on to have more kids 🫠🫠

 

[boatofbubbles]

Anybody else counting down the days til back to school?

 

[justhavinganoseynow]

Yesterday my 2 dogs had a fight over food.. totally out of character. The little one is in season so I said it’s probably because she’s hormonal… queue my 11 and 14 year old girls flipping on me because they hate the way I say hormonal honestly you wouldn’t think I was a female myself.

And they do turn into psychopaths when they’re on their periods therefore they are hormonal

Overall though I don’t like this age at all. Under 8 were the best years now it’s just a slog