One Day of Winter #3 Queen Raven still ruling the roost.... even the Pea has reproduced.

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Imagine if I was Dean his cry for help creating an account on here. I can confirm that I’m not Dean, sadly! Haha.
I mean, it’s nothing you guys haven’t already said. Pea not listening to Dean’s wishes, very different styles and opinions on parenting, pea not letting anyone help etc etc. R being extremely demanding. Tensions are running high. Which I guess could be normal for a house with a newborn and a 3 year old - but it wasn’t like that in my house when I had my second!
 
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This picture told me everything. Body language-wise, it's all about Raven. She's holding Ember because she has to. She's holding Raven because she wants to. She's turned to Raven, they're as close as can be. Ember is literally out in the cold, being fed because without it, she'd starve. Raven is protected and being 'fed' to comfort, to keep a connection. It's disgusting.
 

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It’s just mad to me that Raven gets a grid post and yet another gushing essay - and ember hasn’t had a single one since she was born?

‘I miss her, I miss us’ she is literally inches away from you 24 hours of the day, how can you miss her? You haven’t been torn apart by something terrible you’ve had another beautiful baby - celebrate her, don’t resent her because she’s keeping you away from Raven.
 
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She posted someone else's poem. She hasn't bothered with her own words for Ember. She's tasked her with 'healing their grief' and being 'a gift to Raven'. That poor girl is on her way to therapy at barely a month old.
 
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I am honestly so shocked at this woman. A newborn dumped in the front seat, whilst older sibling rides safely in back (is this because R will try to hit E? Yikes). A newborn left to cry whilst older sibling is fed. A pack of lies told to social media. Pea looks so ill. Believing that turning your back to a child whilst literally bedsharing and nursing them is abandonment. I'm sorry but Pea is very ill.
 
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I think there are some detachment issues, she really could do with some help. Those words are clearly out in Ravens mouth too.
 
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She is so suffocating. The whole post is just needy. I need raven, i miss raven. God woman! Give that child a break. Let her become her own.
 
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Is there a mattress in the living room on a story? I thought I saw that? Does someone sleep there?
 
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The lies on Instagram are quite disturbing. Reminds me of the Louis Theroux doc on mother and baby units. There was a mother on the unit with PND/psychosis (I can’t remember which), and she spoke about the front she put up on Instagram, pretending that everything was rosy when she was seriously unwell.

If Pea is unwell I hope her family intervene fast.
 
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I actually feel so sorry Dean right now, honking hat and all. It must be so tough for him, he must be pretty lonely. Poor bloke probably wants to come off furlough and back to work ASAP just to get out of the house!
 
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That latest post makes me sad...makes it really sound like Ember has ruined things Also what is going to happen in the future when Ember decides she doesn’t want to do something/go out or doesn’t want to get in a car seat (like R used to do)? What if she has to get R to school and Ember doesn’t want to?Will she wait it out until she’s decided she wants to? I think not!! Maybe now Pea will see how silly she was to let R away with all those things, and how that just doesn’t work in the real world
 
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i know ravens a bit of
an annoying nob sometimes (if it’s nasty to call a 3 year old that then i’ll
take that title of nasty) however,
first thahs not her own making she’s a product
of her environment and she’s like this cos of how she’s parented by nicola. second, whilst also being concerned about ember, this whole relationship between nicola
and raven concerns me/ she’s a child and a very young
child at that, being the emotional crutch for a parent has the potential to cause untold
emotional damage to her!
it’s not ravens responsibly to
make
nicola feel “whole” or whatever bullshit she’s been spouting today. putting that much responsibility on a child (i’m sure she doesn’t say it to her but
the feeling will be there) is horrendous
 
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I used to follow someone who called her eldest her ‘soulmate’ and would say how the eldest (still very young!!) girl would look after her siblings because she was ‘sent to help her’.
I thought it was sickening, actually, and I’m getting the same sort of vibes from Pea - your newborn was not *sent as a gift* for your eldest child. That poor baby.
 
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That post on her instagram has took all my power not to comment on. She has made it sound like Ember has ruined her and Ravens life ffs. It's made me so angry
 
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My siblings and I were (and still are) our mother's emotional crutch and I can honestly say its given us all issues as adults, I've been to therapy and I don't have a relationship with her anymore.

She is damaging both these girls.
I literally dream of being 'burdened' by a beautiful baby like Ember.
 
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The comments on it make me sick. Not one person has an issue with any of it, someone even went as far as to say that they are both doing so well, her and Raven. EMBER IS A BABY, not a rabid dog. Jesus, it's like she's a danger to them and their relationship and they're being praised for 'handling' her.
 
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Baby Ember is gorgeous. I feel so sad for her already. Pea needs to get this in hand now. Raven is boss in that house. She needs to steadily ease up on the amount of things she rams into the day. You’d think she was on a school syllabus. Even in reception you don’t have that much rigid structure. She needs to enjoy the baby days. They go by so fast. Why not include Raven in the bathing and fetching things like most toddler siblings love to do that’s how they bond. My children were all very close in age. When we had our youngest baby my eldest was nearly 9 and I had a 7,5,4 and 2 year old. Non of them were pushed out and I spent a little bit of time with them all individually. I’m a nursery nurse so we did some of the activities I’d have done in reception and nursery but nothing too forced , we had fresh air and walked lots. They all had bedtimes. All went down by 6.30pm after baths. I didn’t drive at the time so life was busy with double buggy’s , baby strapped to me, school runs, after school clubs. She’s making it difficult for herself . The feeding of them both isn’t helping and little Ember should be prioritized when it comes to that. I find it uncomfortable to watch. She doesn’t seem happy and relaxed at all. It’s such a shame. Mine all grew up loving each other they’re all the best of friends , no jealousy and I have as strong a bond with each and every one of them. We have 5 boys and a girl. There’s not even jealousy over the girl. Pea is making a rod for her own back.
 
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Also, when Raven was born she made a special trip to the memorial garden and did a lovely post about meeting her brother. She may have been and not posted it, but there’s been no mention of Ember meeting her brother at the memorial. And they’ve been near the memorial because they’ve been to Markeaton park which is down the road! Just makes me think that Ember isn’t special to them at all. Really really sad.
 
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Most people that follow her will be of the same nutty ilk. Unfortunately a lot of people trying to gain attention through an ‘alternative’ parenting style
 
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