Niomi Smart #41 AD, AD, AD

[oshare]

Wait....he READS?

Forky trying to read:

Forky unable to get it done:

Forky cheering himself up again:

 

[laplusheureuse96]

Lol, I’d be so ashamed. I like that A LOT of her fans have finally realized what a fraud she is and that she has basically thrown her morals out the window. Imagine being so fragile that your entire personality and lifestyle deteriorates because of a break up.

 

[TapToBoreMeRigid]

I’m sorry, what?

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Maybe this person has no arms.

 

[North]

I should probably go to bed

 

[LolitaBlah]

 

[StephenTJackson]

Somebody’s updated their profile photo

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Is he suddenly feeling remorse and doing a modern version of the log off and log back in of the AIM days
Maybe he’s feeling jealous of her trip?
Or maybe Niomi’s away and Joe wants to play??

This timing is super awkward. Does anyone think it’s just a coincidence?

Totally a coincidence. Joe doesn't give a flying fuck about Dimbobs these days. He's moved on.

 

[laplusheureuse96]

I missed out on here the last couple of days, I was and still am quite in shock as a co-worker of mine died very suddenly of a heart attack. She was only 34 and we got along well. Apparently she was experiencing a lot of stress due to some personal issues and didn’t take any time off work until the very last moment because she didn’t want to miss anything important.

Couldn’t bring myself to look at anything Dimbobs related - that lazy, vapid, nagging, spoilt brat who knows nothing about hardship in life and thinks she’s the only person in the world who ever had to suffer a break up.

 

[judgejohndeed]

‘You wouldn’t eat 5 donuts’ sounds like a challenge to me

 

[judgejohndeed]

I actually think Niomi has a pathological need for attention and praise that she needs help with tbh. This 'farewell tour' mirrors how she behaved before she MOVED to India, she's going on holiday for 6 weeks ffs! If these people are so important to her how come she doesn't seem to have seen any of them for months? She's literally desperate to know she's wanted and will be missed, I almost think that's what she wants more than the actual trip itself. She honestly creeps me out at this point. I wish she would channel that desperation into a positive cause like volunteering, at least then she'd be doing something that actually helps other people.

 

[cocochino]

Omg she still hasn’t finished reading that book!

Enjoying a slower pace of life! Lmao if her life was any slower, she’d be dead.

 

[sydneybarrett]

Somebody really uploaded this thinking that it looks good......and the only comment was from Big Tezza

Big Tezza always in the comment section like

 

[lilamay]

She's so predictable.

 

[oshare]

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[judgejohndeed]

How can she not ride a scooter but she drives a car? I think my least favourite Niomi trait is when she does the helpless little girl act tbh, it's not funny or cute to be this inept at almost 30. Gives me the ick tbh. I can see why she's appealing to scrotes like Forky who probably loves the idea of having a 'silly little woman who needs a big man to do everything for her'. Foul tbh

 

[curiouscat106]

The fact that she needs to write “I honestly haven’t felt alone once” just screams how lonely she is. The lady doth protest too much, methinks…

 

[coriander]

So she's gone to Bali to do exactly what she's been doing in London....you can't even make this stuff up

Also randomly looked on the Smartskin instagram page (non existent engagement by the way):

Somebody really uploaded this thinking that it looks good......and the only comment was from Big Tezza

 

[Ciri]

I swear she said she was running a marathon this year? Am I losing my mind?

she did : a marathon of ADS

 

[coriander]

Guys I think we can predict her posts for the next 6 weeks.

Yoga on the beach, yoga in the hotel, sunrise yoga, sunset yoga, yoga with her 'friend', yoga yoga yoga
Probably a story about the moon.
Story of her making friends with stray animals.
Finding a soho house equivalent and taking her laptop there to 'work'.
Running in the rain! Whilst complaining about the rain!
100% she'll try a scooter or tag along on the back of someone else's and post a story.
Going to vegan eateries and acting surprised.
Stories of crap books pretending to read.

God I'm bored already

 

[oshare]

I'm done guys. The big Tattle Niomi Bali Bingo Card!

Big thanks to @coriander @Callan @Coldfeet @plasticcup and @North for the suggestions.
I tried to include as many as possible.

Let's hope we can get bingo! Please help cross them off as soon as possible! How many days do you guys think it will take us?

 

[lcd77]

Yes, pool and parties in Bali, meaning she won’t even make the effort to explore the surroundings. And as someone mentioned it recently, I wonder when she intends to catch up with her « local friend » (if she does exist). And how long before she admits her trip or villa or whatever related to Bali is actually gifted?

Maybe that’s what she meant by settling in, getting to know her surroundings, and meeting lots of lovely new people.

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She must feel like home there with those flamingos in the back