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Yes - well most things in the podcast are legal (just!) but that doesn't make them right. Why, for example, did he feel he had the right to launch himself at Julia and push her back on the sofa? Surely he should establish consent beforehand? and yet, growing up I thought that kind of behaviour was the norm. I thought if a man grabbed you or kissed you with force, or without checking it was OK with you first, it was romantic. This article really hit home with me, and made me think about my own experiences and expectations. I wrote a lot of fiction growing up, and some of the dynamics/relationships in the stories are hard to read now.
7 Reasons So Many Guys Don’t Understand Sexual Consent | Cracked.com
I entirely believe the women who have told their stories. While much of what he is alleged to have done isn't illegal, that doesn't make it OK - and the fact that he had held onto emails from K (I think), producing one as 'proof' without context, says that he knew very well what he was doing. Also he was very careful with his own texts, as if knowing they would be produced as evidence one day. For someone who acts as if he has no control and who is very rough sexually, he is remarkably in control in other aspects of his life.
The texts from Scarlett will pretty much destroy a case, I'd imagine, because there is no nuance in text. Even if you put into context her emotions and her vulnerability, he hasn't done anything "wrong" (illegal) and he has clear evidence of her consent - which she admits. Which is, in reality, how it should be - it is a case of he said/she said, and he has the evidence to back up his story. But he is a deeply unpleasant man nonetheless. I'm uncomfortable with him being "cancelled" as I'd rather he continued to churn out his books and nobody bought them. That sends a clearer message than a publishing house dropping you because you're damaged goods (IMO).
I think he will also get a lot of people supporting him because he is bloody convincing with his soft eloquence and his "poor me, I've been so mistaken, poor muddled confused man" 'apology'. Also because his accusers continued to go out with him and sleep with him despite his appalling behaviour and asked him for money. People don't get WHY people do certain things (for example, a rape victim might become very promiscuous either as an attempt to reclaim their body or because they loathe it and see it as worthless - which then results in "oh, they cant' have been raped as they're sleeping around" judgements - and moreover they don't always want to. If you like NG - if he's your friend or an idol, you won't want to hear bad stuff about him. You'll cling to every excuse you can find to dismiss his accusers.
7 Reasons So Many Guys Don’t Understand Sexual Consent | Cracked.com
I entirely believe the women who have told their stories. While much of what he is alleged to have done isn't illegal, that doesn't make it OK - and the fact that he had held onto emails from K (I think), producing one as 'proof' without context, says that he knew very well what he was doing. Also he was very careful with his own texts, as if knowing they would be produced as evidence one day. For someone who acts as if he has no control and who is very rough sexually, he is remarkably in control in other aspects of his life.
The texts from Scarlett will pretty much destroy a case, I'd imagine, because there is no nuance in text. Even if you put into context her emotions and her vulnerability, he hasn't done anything "wrong" (illegal) and he has clear evidence of her consent - which she admits. Which is, in reality, how it should be - it is a case of he said/she said, and he has the evidence to back up his story. But he is a deeply unpleasant man nonetheless. I'm uncomfortable with him being "cancelled" as I'd rather he continued to churn out his books and nobody bought them. That sends a clearer message than a publishing house dropping you because you're damaged goods (IMO).
I think he will also get a lot of people supporting him because he is bloody convincing with his soft eloquence and his "poor me, I've been so mistaken, poor muddled confused man" 'apology'. Also because his accusers continued to go out with him and sleep with him despite his appalling behaviour and asked him for money. People don't get WHY people do certain things (for example, a rape victim might become very promiscuous either as an attempt to reclaim their body or because they loathe it and see it as worthless - which then results in "oh, they cant' have been raped as they're sleeping around" judgements - and moreover they don't always want to. If you like NG - if he's your friend or an idol, you won't want to hear bad stuff about him. You'll cling to every excuse you can find to dismiss his accusers.
