Mumsnet #4

[Sglodion]

Anyone reading the ‘how much do you spend on shopping a week’ thread in AIBU? Someone feeds 6 people for £50

Is it Jack Monroe's secret account?

I'd never associate the name Madeleine/Maddie with Madeleine McCann unless they also had a similar surname. I've met several in my life and have never made the connection. Myra probably would make me think of Myra Hindley, but only because it's an uncommon name in the UK these days - and anyway, does it really matter? I usually find after meeting someone once or twice you stop thinking about their name anyway, even if it's unusual. (Although saying that I did once work with someone whose surname was Stalin - no relation - and I never fully got over it. Poor guy was really nice as well!)

 

[Blond3g1rl]

Hello MN’ers, welcome to Tattle

 

[BethanyGilbert]

My daughter is called Jessica. Nobody has ever said oh like Jessica Chapman? Surely Soham is just an infamous?

 

[DaisyDeluxe]

Re the step parent thing, I've seen some really horrible comments by posters claiming to be "step parents". Don't get me wrong, I know many stepmums out there have a hard time wrangling with the birth mother, who can be very awkward and difficult to deal with. But the comments from stepmums on there are just plain nasty, and directly towards the children, which I find abhorrent. No matter what you think of the other adults involved, you should NEVER treat the child like second best. You have a choice to be in that situation, the children don't. Going by some of the posters there I thought "no wonder the birth mother doesn't give you the time of day, I wouldn't either".

What does everyone think of the stepmum who didnt get her stepchildren easter eggs but got their 3 year old together one because he should buy his own kids eggs? I think its mean spirited personality she sounds nasty . If youre going to begrudge picking up an egg for them don't get with someone who has children.

Equally shame on him for being with someone who would treat his child like that. If I was in another relationship, anyone who behaved like that would be getting the elbow.

 

[Gym&Tonic]

There is a thread on there at the moment about Logan the little boy murdered by his mum and her partner. So many of them are getting very defensive whenever anyone criticises women who can’t be on their own, introduce new men into their children’s lives too quickly and subsequently put the new partners needs first. One of them actually said ‘Am I supposed to be alone forever?!’ Well no and no one has actually said that either, just pointed out that’s it’s better to get to know someone first and gradually introduce them to their children before moving them in. You can just tell they are those needy women who can’t be alone and put their need for a bag above everything else, and then a few months down the line will be posting in relationships about how it’s all gone bits up and the kids and partner don’t get along,

 

[Slothgang]

There is a thread on there at the moment about Logan the little boy murdered by his mum and her partner. So many of them are getting very defensive whenever anyone criticises women who can’t be on their own, introduce new men into their children’s lives too quickly and subsequently put the new partners needs first. One of them actually said ‘Am I supposed to be alone forever?!’ Well no and no one has actually said that either, just pointed out that’s it’s better to get to know someone first and gradually introduce them to their children before moving them in. You can just tell they are those needy women who can’t be alone and put their need for a bag above everything else, and then a few months down the line will be posting in relationships about how it’s all gone bits up and the kids and partner don’t get along,

Tbf I think this was in response to the OP saying she would never ever introduce a step parent into her children's life, which is a bit of a silly comment to make in itself.

 

[PrincessCharming]

My parents split when I was 5. Both of them had many long and short term partners. It was tedious for my brother and I. We were adults by the time they both remarried and they both divorced yet again, and the cycle repeated itself but this time they had new kids to mess up.

I feel very strongly that kids should not be introduced to new partners until quite far down the line and definitely not move in unless it’s a life partner.

 

[Lalla]

There's a balance between never having another relationship, and effectively having a revolving door of new partners.

There's a woman in my street who falls into the latter category. She split up with her Ex (father of her 5 kids) about 4 years ago, since then she's had at least 4 different 'partners' come and go, all of whom have moved in pretty quickly, sometimes bringing their own kids too. The kids seem to be encouraged to refer to each other as siblings, think of the latest bloke as their stepdad etc, until it all goes to tit in a few months and then there's a new bloke on the scene. It's pretty grim really.

A common thread in a lot of these cases where children end up murdered by a parent or stepparent is the brevity of the relationship... meeting and moving in together very quickly, and/ or having children quickly.

 

[Little Miss]

I was reading the thread where it was asked if you would be disappointed in your children and this was one of the replies

Seriously what is wrong with them on that site

 

[CyanideKiss]

The new site is so clunky. It looks like it was made by Fisher Price.

 

[Pipsy]

While the crying comments are ridiculous, I am disappointed, as it does strain my eyes enough that if MN decide to keep it I won't bother with the site anymore. Is it designed to improve app functioning or readability or something? I do everything through my laptop, I wondered if that's why it's looking especially tit.

 

[Kaylon8083]

The new site makes Mumsnet look even more like a budget site. Apparently Mumsnet have been in the process of re-platforming for three years and according to Justine in Site Stuff that they're experiencing issues and bugs as a result. Surely, these would have been sorted out before they went live?

 

[SpindleWhorl]

I don't understand the point in the new "formatting" of the site, I don't think there's been any new features added at all? Still can't react to posts. "Mumsnet is a very large, complicated and old site" - It's not a complicated site at all it's the most basic of message boards that are still on the internet today and way past its heyday

 

[Sglodion]

I don't understand the point in the new "formatting" of the site, I don't think there's been any new features added at all? Still can't react to posts. "Mumsnet is a very large, complicated and old site" - It's not a complicated site at all it's the most basic of message boards that are still on the internet today and way past its heyday

Justine said something about how the reason it was so buggy and hard to implement new features was that there were several different versions of the site and that the replatforming consolidated them all into one. She didn't elaborate on what she meant exactly, but it sounds to me like it was built on shonky code originally - probably because it was done in house rather than using vBulletin or another forum software package that was around at the time - and then issues were constantly patched over with further layers of bad code until the whole thing became an unworkable mess. The redesign was probably more about having to rebuild the 'behind the scenes' from the ground up than changing features at the user level, though if this is the case then it should be much easier to add new features from now on. I'm not sure why they changed the look so much, though.

 

[Wackie Jeaver]

@Sglodion it sounds as if you know what you are talking about As a mere lurker (ok, banned) on there, it's so difficult to use now!! Surely cannot be the desired result.

 

[Sglodion]

@Sglodion it sounds as if you know what you are talking about

Only in that I'm also very bad at writing code and have extensive experience in the 'implementing lazy sticking plasters that make everything worse' technique

(ok, banned)

Lol, what was your crime?

 

[Wackie Jeaver]

Only in that I'm also very bad at writing code and have extensive experience in the 'implementing lazy sticking plasters that make everything worse' technique


Lol, what was your crime?

Disagreed that any criticism of Meghan Markle and Harry was racist. Also took piss out of said couple, quite a lot. "Not in the spirit, not the site for you" they said. They're probably right

 

[SpindleWhorl]

Disagreed that any criticism of Meghan Markle and Harry was racist. Also took piss out of said couple, quite a lot. "Not in the spirit, not the site for you" they said. They're probably right

Well I got banned for speculating about celebrity affairs, Never know what they mean by "not in the spirit of the site" considering most users rip the tit out of each other in most threads, particularly in AIBU and the passive aggressiveness is off the scale in the rest of them. Tattlers are much more friendly and supportive of each other and they reserve their venom for where it is actually deserved

 

[GirlWithThePearlEarhole]

Disagreed that any criticism of Meghan Markle and Harry was racist. Also took piss out of said couple, quite a lot. "Not in the spirit, not the site for you" they said. They're probably right

I was banned for stating the obvious that MM had a nose job. They said I only ever posted criticism of her. I thought my comment about the nose surgery was a statement of fact actually.

 

[Traveler001]

Well I got banned for speculating about celebrity affairs, Never know what they mean by "not in the spirit of the site" considering most users rip the tit out of each other in most threads, particularly in AIBU and the passive aggressiveness is off the scale in the rest of them. Tattlers are much more friendly and supportive of each other and they reserve their venom for where it is actually deserved

The spirit of the site is for parents to help other parents or call each other bleeps, or ag off family members, friends, the partner or their kids school. It’s not for being meanies to celebrities who will never see it.