Mrs Hinch #466 Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz, But the very next day, you edited it away
Winning thread title by @Pollyanna263 and @Brummiebird 
Winning thread titles taken from page 30 onwards guyshhh
Keep them short and sweet so they can fit
No swears in titles!
Another quick recap because we're getting froo a fred a day here guyshhh!
So Soph is 'home sweet home' from her trip to Scotland to see Katie's mum and she immediately posted an inappropriate quote about how all that matters is your loved ones are 'well'. The whole thing smacked of a 'thank god it's not me" attitude. She quickly edited her post to add in that she misses Katie already. So sincere I'm sure.
Her sheep are all being very OTT and acting like she the second coming for visiting a child who lives with a disability. She's not done anything that warrants any of this praise. All she's actually done is visit a lovely young girl and her family. If the sheep think she deserves a medal because that girl happens to live with a disability, they might want to look at themselves.
She's upset her BFF (in his own heed) Mario by not visiting him when she was so close by at the weekend. He's done a dramatic flounce off on the gram after posting then deleting a load of guff about being loyal etc
He's not named names but the fact that she didn't call in for a beige buffet and some hot choc has clearly really upset the wee hobbit.
We await the end of his comma from the gram with baited breath and hope for a 346 dot story that alludes to Hinch being a
twit. The reality is she'll send him a lounge suit from her new range and he'll be licking her bumhole again by the weekend.
Spine bright ma lovelie.
Jamie was quite active on his profile yesterday too. Posting his usual creepy content of a photo of Soph in bed at the hotel and then a video of her eating a packet of crisps with her face mask on. If you missed it, it had a similar vibe to a giraffe eating a carrot through a letterbox.
Today she sent Ronnie off to Nursery for his Christmas party / non uniform day dressed as Brian Harvey from East 17 in 1994.
He looked like he was going to hold up the local off license with a pen knife but is actually going to play pass the parcel with the posh kids who's parents work for a living
She's also forgotten that she told us that it was his non uniform day on Friday when she was visiting Virgin radio.
She has launched another collectshun of grey loungewear for Tesshhhco. It looks exactly like all her previous collectshuns and is over priced and dreary. A bit like her.
She modelled her own range and the boney shoulder and scraggy neck made a star appearance in most of the photos despite the fact that they looked perfectly normal in all her appearances over the weekend.
The clothes rail had previously been spotted in the background of earlier stories and Ron was wearing his gifted onesie on holiday at Peppa Pig World so more pre-records at work.
Elf Update.
Today's Elf story was that he whipped up a disgusting creation in the kitchen, with biscuits, pretzels, sweeties and cereal in a pan - though it could have just been Sophie's latest lunch recipe.
We end with this year's official Tattle Hinchmas song (I say this year's, it's our first one) by our lovely
@Pollyanna263 and @brummiebird
Sing along to the tune of Wham's Last Christmas
Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz
But the very next day, you edited it away.
Next year to save me from tears,
I’ll only edit my nostrils.
Snapped my toe and morphine high.
I fleece my sheep, but they still buy, buy, buy
Tell me sheeples, do you recognise me?
Well I’ve got so many faces, it doesn’t
surprise me.
Merry Christmas, P&G will pay me,
Wrapped it up, wrote ‘love from Mum and Jamie’
Now I know what a con woman I’ve been,
But if you forget it now I know I’ll fleece you again.
Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz
But the very next day, you edited it away.
Next year to save me from tears,
I’ll only edit my nostrils.
A crowded room, tummy anxiety,
I hide my face, no phoootos of me.
My sheep, you thought I was someone to rely on.
Me? My shoulder can’t keep its clothes on.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart,
Mario’s under cover cos I tore him apart.
Ooh, ooh, now I've been to Paisley,
But not to Mario’s for tea.
Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz
But the very next day, you edited it away.
Next year to save me from tears,
I’ll only edit my nostrils.
Last Christmas I gave you my foootzz
But the very next day, you edited it away.
Next year to save me from tears,
I’ll only edit my nostrils.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart,
Jamie’s at the dump with Ronnieblessisart.
Maybe next year, we’ll take him somewhere special,
I am so special.
Wiki is the pink button at the top for newbies.
Ronnie and Lennie don’t rhyme.
Sophie doesn’t have a second name she added Rose in her teens.
Jamie is short for James.
