Well done!Finally caught up with you all. I shamefully admit I used to be a hincher. I wasn't part of the barmy army buying shitloads of zoflora (Can't stand the stuff) and trolling people, but I did follow her cleaning stories and bought stuff on her recommendation.
I am happy to report I have now seen the light!
She’s not only lied, but then deliberately “uncovered” her book photos after the shoot on the same day as another shoot to “confuse” her minions.I think I need to put my phone in a drawer for the day. It's winding me up so much that she very blatently lied about doing her own make up for the book cover. If she's being deceitful about that how many other things has 'beautiful inside and out' Soph not been truthful about. And don't get me started on the MUA boasting about the make up he did when it wasn't allowed. Argh! I'm off to find a field to look at
I started following Hinch when lockdown happened. I got anxious about coronavirus, germs etc and wanted tips on how to properly clean my house. I vaguely knew she was insta famous for cleaning so I bought her books and read cover to cover, caught up on her old Instagram stories. And then I thought that because I didn't have all the products she uses that I needed to go out and buy them to clean properly. I remember legging it to B&M 15 minutes before closing in the hopes it would be empty (because coronavirus) and I filled my trolley and spent like £70 on Zoflora, Minkys, different scents of Lenor, microfibre cloths, spray bottles, white vinegar, bicarbonate of soda, febreze, Pine loo stuff etc etc.Also I reckon she was sitting on the landing because Ronnie (the bog obsessed, dirty look throwing hero that he is), was refusing to sleep. Even though Twinset probably did all the back and forth settling him, she didn't get her night on that rancid sofa sniffing a wax melt!
Storytime: I discovered Hinch because my other half is an NHS nurse on a covid icu, and when all this covid fuckery kicked off we had a pretty stringent 'decontamination' routine after work for him as I'm regularly in contact with vulnerable people in the community. He'd get in from work, strip, run to the shower etc etc and I'd go behind him disinfecting every area he'd been in on his way to the shower, and then shower myself. I remembered the weird cloth lady who always had stories in the Sun and thought she might have some tips for frontline workers given that, well, she's a cleaner. NOTHING!
I knew there was something off about her the second I watched her stories, like the feeding poor Ron Ella's pouches when he should have been trying his first real foods, the dog's dick always out, Fred Vest just... Sitting in the house watching her clean instead of having a job. Still, I bought a pack of minkys in the absence of any actual pandemic cleaning ideas. Then when bbqgate happened I caught a rogue comment before she managed to delete it and stumbled upon you lot! I can only dream of having your eagle eyes for pre records and recycled content one day, and some of you are a bit weird about what is or is not going on in her womb, but thank you for showing me the light before I bought my second pack of minkys (which just fucking fall apart FYI).
I can only deduce that her freaky followers clean because they have fuck all else to do, can't get a real hobby, or just want nice pictures of lined up zoflora, because even when I looked back on her highlights I didn't see a single useful cleaning idea, pandemic related or not. She's a saleswoman who used the right hashtag at the right time one day
Yeah & she'd call it 'Do they know it's hinchmas' she'd have all her vom inducing hinchers(all 25 of them!) as backing singers with mops for microphones!!!!! that would seriously piss me offChrist, don’t give her ideas...
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