Bumble BFF? I have considered that for meeting more “quirky” fellas. Your new bff sounds like a keeper ngl
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Dated a fella who was 6 ft 5, worst advertising of my LIFE, his fool was 1.5 inches long when fully erect SO IT JUST SLIPPED OUT ALL THE TIME. And he dumped me. RIP my dignity (and his lack of peen).
I think that’s the length of my big toe, and I have size 5 feet
Now that really is a teeny peeny
I'm feeling poetic. So here goes. I hope you like it.....
An ode to the fool,
Or the humble wick,
The wee fella,
The rooster, the pecker.
They vary in shape and size,
But the one that gets my prize,
Is the one that's bent like a banana.
I don't want to lick it or suck,
I most definitely don't want a duck,
I'm happy to observe
As it grows big and curved
Then I can use it to hang up my dressing gown.
Do I need to bow or something? Do a curtesy?
An ode to the fool,
Or the humble wick,
The wee fella,
The rooster, the pecker.
They vary in shape and size,
But the one that gets my prize,
Is the one that's bent like a banana.
I don't want to lick it or suck,
I most definitely don't want a duck,
I'm happy to observe
As it grows big and curved
Then I can use it to hang up my dressing gown.
Do I need to bow or something? Do a curtesy?
Yes, but do chodes really exist??!!All done - scroll on for the drum roll moment …
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Hells Bells, tell me that’s not actually a poor creature’s head
Dumped by a fella with a wee party sausage.
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Roses are red
Violets are blue
I hate rhyming
pen
This dog's just like my JR except mine's a lovely tan colour instead of black. She's an absolute sweetie except she thinks she bigger than a Rottweiler and smaller than a Yorkie.Me, a newbie to the thread coming here to see if people are debating the juror no-shows, and instead reading about chodes and raspberry holes:
View attachment 2317320
This reminds me of a guy I went with back in my younger days. I went “down on him” in his aunties living room (he stayed with her). When he released his “juices” in my mouth I could feel big lumps and stringy bits of cheeseyness, it absolutely stunk! I panicked cause was I hell swallowing that! As he got up I faked swallowing it and was holding in gagging, he walked out the room to go to the bathroom and I coughed, sneezed and gagged at the same time and it splattered all over my face. I was literally peeling it off my face in big lumpy clumps. I wiped it under the aunties rug as I panicked not knowing where to put it.
Sorry tmi but it scarred me for a good few years.
Sadly I think the longer this goes on the less likely the jury are going to deliver a verdict. I think in complex cases like this juries comprised of average Joes aren't the best to decide.Annoying jurors, they could’ve just wrapped it up last week. Why drag it out
You gotta wonder if some of these posts are actually from blokes who are posting their fantasies…. 
We need the jury back now…thread’s gone rogue
I would be extremely worried if that was a blokes fantasyYou gotta wonder if some of these posts are actually from blokes who are posting their fantasies….
That bell ched post has give me PTSD
Please don’t let this be the protagonist for a bunch of cheesy fool stories
Imagine explaining to outsiders that the thread about a raging baby killer was the funniest thread on here. They be like
I’m pretty sure I suffered with this for a few years after the incident
I was 18 at the time. I’m now 33. The trauma I swear!- Status