Thank you to @pink_norris for the appropriate thread title!
February/March 2021
Well, our last thread started off the day before Valentine's Day, when Lorna was hotly anticipating amanor house flat full of pink roses from John. She had hinted enough. John, however, supplied our favourite luxe lady with a bunch of red roses. We know that she took rather a dim view of these, because the gifted pink roses received a lot of camera time and the red roses received, well, none. Lorna also expressed her romantic side by getting a friend balloon supplier to come and create an arch of pink and white balloons in the white room, one of which was a special one with John's name on it. We suspect he was floored (literally) by this sentimental and passionate gesture, as we've not seen him in weeks. That could also have something to do with the red roses, though.
Meanwhile, the carparks of Horsham have seen their fair share of luxe photoshoots, with Lorna dressing up like one of those grungy kids you avoid in a dark carpark in case they mug you, and then luxing it up with a Chanel handbag or three. I suppose, to her credit, at least she's spent less time sitting in the car outside the flat in the past month -- well, except for the time she took Boo to the vet whilst wearing every designer piece of clothing she owned, and boasting about her new sunglasses from Australia that make her look like a serial killer.
There has been yet another In The Style launch, this time with a rather bizarre plastic leather apron, to be styled over a long shirt (?), and then a lot of Barbie candyfloss pink. Most of it made our eyes bleed, but presumably some of it was bought and thensent straight back worn with pride. There was also a somewhat extraordinary black playsuit which was advertised relentlessly, but somehow that never made it onto the In The Style website... The plot thickens... Then again, we also never saw the hi-viz jacket she was going to buy -- in fairness though, she did say she'd only show it it to us 'if she found a really good one'.
The last thread ended with a considerably horrific lipstick tutorial in the form of a reel that put us all off our dinner. Lorna has also taken some advice to apply blusher higher up on your cheekbones and, totally misunderstanding the concept, now religiously applies her blusher up to her temples. That, combined with the too-dark foundation, greasy skin, crooked eyeliner, and giant joker lips, has left us all genuinely questioning if a) she's gone mad, b) she's blind, or c) she's gone mad.
For any newcomers, please read the Wiki entry here for background information on the Queen of Faux Luxe.
And continue...
February/March 2021
Well, our last thread started off the day before Valentine's Day, when Lorna was hotly anticipating a
Meanwhile, the carparks of Horsham have seen their fair share of luxe photoshoots, with Lorna dressing up like one of those grungy kids you avoid in a dark carpark in case they mug you, and then luxing it up with a Chanel handbag or three. I suppose, to her credit, at least she's spent less time sitting in the car outside the flat in the past month -- well, except for the time she took Boo to the vet whilst wearing every designer piece of clothing she owned, and boasting about her new sunglasses from Australia that make her look like a serial killer.
There has been yet another In The Style launch, this time with a rather bizarre plastic leather apron, to be styled over a long shirt (?), and then a lot of Barbie candyfloss pink. Most of it made our eyes bleed, but presumably some of it was bought and then
The last thread ended with a considerably horrific lipstick tutorial in the form of a reel that put us all off our dinner. Lorna has also taken some advice to apply blusher higher up on your cheekbones and, totally misunderstanding the concept, now religiously applies her blusher up to her temples. That, combined with the too-dark foundation, greasy skin, crooked eyeliner, and giant joker lips, has left us all genuinely questioning if a) she's gone mad, b) she's blind, or c) she's gone mad.
For any newcomers, please read the Wiki entry here for background information on the Queen of Faux Luxe.
And continue...
