Life in Lockdown: Parenting edition

[Bitofthebubbly]

I’ve got a 4 & 7 year old and the first week has been ok. They have mostly been playing in the garden pretty much morning till evening as we’ve been lucky with the weather (not so much today) and also watching things on Disney+ In the evenings. Their school has set ‘learning projects’ which aren’t compulsory and sent tonnes of resources but school stuff has gone out the window, partner attempted maths with them once and they just wanted to go outside and nearly ended in tears. They did do the joe wicks ‘pe lesson’ once but I found him annoying, thinking of trying cosmic kids yoga at some point. I figured they’re happy playing outside and who knows how long this will go on for, I’m sure there will be plenty of time for phonics practice. We haven’t done any of the fancy camping in the garden type stuff either. It’s been pretty ‘normal’ so far. To them it’s similar to school holidays except we haven’t gone out. One thing I have done is introduced ‘snack coupons’ which has curbed the endless asking for snacks as once they’ve used them up for the day that’s it. They’ve taken to it really well which surprised me, might even keep it going once this is all over.

No idea how this week will pan out. Trying to take each day as it comes and not worry too much about how long this will go on for.

 

[tskiry56]

Don’t listen to that voice. I’ve been there before (abusive relationship) so I know it’s a struggle but your ex said that to make you feel like tit - you can’t let him succeed years later. You’re doing your best for your son and trying to educate him, you’re obviously not a rubbish mum!

Thank you ... I think the added pressure of not being able to leave the house and go to work etc just adds to it plus not seeing family.
I think some times we forget what we have gone through... my sons dad was abusive too! And I dont think I will ever forget what he did to me. I find it hard because my son is too young to understand what happened completely although he did witness alot of it.
It makes it even worse that he still has to see him while all this is going on and ill be stuck inside and there is no distractions to take my mind of it. When he did see him thr other day he told my son he didnt see him for over a year because he was poorly. - its al the lies that get to me.

 

[Boredofthegram]

I’m struggling with juggling work and school work. My son is only 4 so a young reception year and the stuff school is setting he doesn’t want to know (phonics and writing mainly). I don’t want to pressure too much as it’s hard enough as it is not seeing friends and family. Il never take things for granted again after all this.

 

[chocolate choux]

Thank you ... I think the added pressure of not being able to leave the house and go to work etc just adds to it plus not seeing family.
I think some times we forget what we have gone through... my sons dad was abusive too! And I dont think I will ever forget what he did to me. I find it hard because my son is too young to understand what happened completely although he did witness alot of it.
It makes it even worse that he still has to see him while all this is going on and ill be stuck inside and there is no distractions to take my mind of it. When he did see him thr other day he told my son he didnt see him for over a year because he was poorly. - its al the lies that get to me.

Yes, the isolation isn’t helping at all - I’m finding my thoughts are wandering to the past too now without so many distractions. It’s like we can’t focus on the present because the present is currently pretty empty. I hate the lies too, but at least it further proves who is the bad parent in this situation - how horrible of him to lie to his son like that after everything else

 

[tskiry56]

Yes, the isolation isn’t helping at all - I’m finding my thoughts are wandering to the past too now without so many distractions. It’s like we can’t focus on the present because the present is currently pretty empty. I hate the lies too, but at least it further proves who is the bad parent in this situation - how horrible of him to lie to his son like that after everything else

I feel guilty some times for feeling negative about things and every thing I let happen. I'm just thankful that I'm not in this lock down situation with my ex and also in a different house. I think considering everything that a survivor of DV does to escape we have a lot of strength. One thing I will never do is lie.
I just braved the outside after being too anxious to go to the shop and admittedly it wasnt too bad. We just have to remember this lock down is all for our own wellbeing, it's just hard for young children to understand why they are not going to school why they can't see friends or family.

 

[MakkaPakka]

I have an 8-year-old who's been doing quite OK so far. I'm the one who's struggling - I still do shifts in the office (key worker) and some at home, I co-parent with my ex, but I feel terrible for craving time on my own and I secretly dread playing in the garden with my son (when I should be glad we have one!). I let him play with the neighbours' kid, not sure this is OK but I can't keep them apart!

 

[Yorkshirewife]

I'm losing the will to bleeping live.

 

[Sven]

I'm losing the will to bleeping live.

Here, have this

 

[Yorkshirewife]

Here, have this

Thank you

 

[Jellycat99]

I have a 5 and 1.5 year old and I can't wait till I can send them back to school/nursery, don't get me wrong I am so so grateful that we get to be at home together and stay safe but duck me, I'm bored of playing dogs and I'm absolutely shattered.
I'm a key worker (early years educator in a nursery) so I went into work one morning last week and my eldest went to school, they then called me and said there's hardly any children so the majority of us are going on the furlough scheme. My eldest was saying this morning how he's going to school tomorrow and was not happy when he found out that he was staying at home with me. My youngest is used to doing 3 full days at nursery and he's really missing it and his little pals.
We're doing some reading, phonics and maths for about 20 mins in the morning and afternoon and that's about it. We did bake cakes, paint fence/shed, made garages for all the cars, used nerf guns at shooting targets last week and I've ran out of ideas now. Plus what the actual duck do I give them for lunch? My eldest has hot dinners and youngest gets lunch at nursery so I'm not used to it

 

[Sven]

I have a 5 and 1.5 year old and I can't wait till I can send them back to school/nursery, don't get me wrong I am so so grateful that we get to be at home together and stay safe but duck me, I'm bored of playing dogs and I'm absolutely shattered.
I'm a key worker (early years educator in a nursery) so I went into work one morning last week and my eldest went to school, they then called me and said there's hardly any children so the majority of us are going on the furlough scheme. My eldest was saying this morning how he's going to school tomorrow and was not happy when he found out that he was staying at home with me. My youngest is used to doing 3 full days at nursery and he's really missing it and his little pals.
We're doing some reading, phonics and maths for about 20 mins in the morning and afternoon and that's about it. We did bake cakes, paint fence/shed, made garages for all the cars, used nerf guns at shooting targets last week and I've ran out of ideas now. Plus what the actual duck do I give them for lunch? My eldest has hot dinners and youngest gets lunch at nursery so I'm not used to it

Haha! I do packed lunches for my daughter even when she’s at preschool. Just chuck em a sandwich and an apple!

 

[F the dust.]

It's trying. I have 4 boys. My youngest having autism. All seeming to have lost the use of their limbs to do anything for themselves...trying to ensure school work is getting done,that they don't kill each Other and keeping myself sane is challenging to say the least!

 

[Titntat]

God I feel awful. After reading here some people have really got it tough.
I've got a 8 month old. Who's a bleeping terrorist. Shes as fast lighting and into everything.
It's a nightmare getting her down for a nap. When she does nap I'm literally bolloxed and I can hear my self sighing when my 6 year old asks me to play (feel absolutely awful). We are trying abit of home schooling.
My 6 year old is so keen but theres nothing I can just leave her to do whilst trying to entertain a 8 month old.
I feel so tit but I'm counting down the hours till bed time everyday. I'm back at work soon and I know I'll regret not making more of an effort when I'm back.

 

[SunshineDreamer]

This is the first time in all this that I’ve reached breaching point - and I’m blaming the weather. I’m sick (not corona virus) the baby is teething, the preschoolers are climbing the walls and I haven’t seen my husband in 4days because he’s a doctor and staying at our flat instead of coming home.

 

[Lanie]

I've set my seven year old 3 school tasks everyday. Normally we do a subject or writing, a video and then reading. After that schools out. We play games, watch the various television apps and have a dance party (requested by my youngest every night) I let them do whatever tasks they choose after the school tasks. They are happy. We also go for a walk every couple of days. My boys have always been active so they do find it odd I am not treking them all over town.

 

[Bitofthebubbly]

So the snack coupon idea started off well and is still serving its purpose of stopping the incessant asking for snacks, seems to have taken a life of its own or should I say my partner has got involved and instead of it being geared towards making healthier choices with their 5 coupons a day, it’s now turned into this thing where they can get a biscuit for one coupon so obviously they will pick that over a piece of fruit for one coupon. It’s pissed me off if I’m honest, I purposely set it up a certain way so they weren’t snacking on crap every snack time but could still have treats occasionally, you know that thing called moderation. I love my partner but he has an annoying habit of taking something over and making it ‘better’. I’m sure the kids love it but it’s not what I originally set up and that’s annoying.

Think the isolation is getting to me today.

 

[Londoncailín]

So the snack coupon idea started off well and is still serving its purpose of stopping the incessant asking for snacks, seems to have taken a life of its own or should I say my partner has got involved and instead of it being geared towards making healthier choices with their 5 coupons a day, it’s now turned into this thing where they can get a biscuit for one coupon so obviously they will pick that over a piece of fruit for one coupon. It’s pissed me off if I’m honest, I purposely set it up a certain way so they weren’t snacking on crap every snack time but could still have treats occasionally, you know that thing called moderation. I love my partner but he has an annoying habit of taking something over and making it ‘better’. I’m sure the kids love it but it’s not what I originally set up and that’s annoying.

Think the isolation is getting to me today.

Eat all the snacks. That might help make you feel better

 

[quinzel]

Have a 6 month old. Luckily my partner is home too so we share the work lol.

 

[Web30]

My 5 year old seems to be doing good. The only thing is she's wanting to ring family all the time, which I get as we normally see them everyday (childcare) other then that she's her normal happy self.

 

[Prgirl_cesca]

My daughter who is 5 is doing remarkably well which is madness as she is a complete force of nature normally and she would have been the one I was terrified of going loco in all this. Turns out she is just a homebody and is enjoying time with us and actually the slower pace of life...she even fell asleep on me on Saturday She does her school work happily.

My son (nearly 9...which will fall probably during lockdown) is another story. He was always the easy, gentle, kind one and he has been so hard. Very anxious but also selfish, rude and lazy. Tries to get out of school work, winds us all up and would rather just watch a screen for 14hrs a day. He has also got incredibly angry and shouty which he has never been like before. I have tried to be sympathetic but my patience is wearing thin....I have let him video call friends but he just ran around screaming and showing off (I found him hanging my phone out of his window on one call), we went to see his beloved grandparents to chat over the fence and he refused to even say hello which really upset his dad. Not sure what to do really.

However I am a glass half full kind of girl and I have 'enjoyed' some of the home schooling and have been astounded by how bright they are! And they have had a turning point today where they finally 'got' that mummy (and daddy) still have to work and are not their slaves. We have been lucky that school havent sent home that much.

Thinking of those with babies and toddlers. That tit is relentless even with freedom to go out.