Lauren Goodger #88 You pretend to swim laps and show your baps and flaps. You're just Putin on a show.

[Clickbait]

Well done @NotAgain? on your winning thread title. BYG is going to send you her special HelloFresh discount code that is widely available on the internet and is in no way special.

It’s been a weird old time in Lozza land. Going to attempt a recap without scrolling back as I’m knackered and it’s past my bedtime…

• As the last thread closed BYG had just featured in some more staged shots allegedly taken outside the gym. In the time it takes you to read this recap she will have started and failed another 3 health and fitness regimes.
• She held an underwhelming birthday party for Larose (whose likeness to Eric Bristow was spotted) and also took her to Southampton and Peppa Pig World where she was spotted ‘in the wild’ by a Scrunchie.
• She’s been trying to increase her social media presence but seems completely unable to do a live by herself.
• Her OnlyFans punters are reporting she sells them videos of her and then blocks them so they lose access.
• Chaz.5 has pleaded not guilty on the charges (ABH and controlling or coercive behaviour) which were brought. This means he will be standing trial in March 2024.
• It seems BYG might be a little peturbed by what might be revealed in court. She may have tried to buy him off with her Preloved tat IG page, but he wasn’t biting and now she wants it back.
• Chaz has been saving up money from his TikTok battles to buy a bottom set of Turkey teef. Barking like a dog appears to be more lucrative than you’d imagine. He also revealed on a live that he has a new girlfriend, although no photo evidence as yet.

 

[Jujujulia95]

So she's lichrally parked her car inches away from the court in a parking job that looks like the scene of an accident, took two steps, sat down in a chair facing away from the court and the deserted table? At least she's made sure to put a pair of running shoes on, I mean, she is on a tennis court after all, having taken all of five steps, can you imagine the wear of them soles after this?! Make it all make sense

 

[Kerrie86]

Beautiful recap. You’ve found so much to recap when she’s actually done duck all.

 

[CrazyBaldhead]

Well Scrunchies, let's start the new thread off with BYG "working out" in the wild! She ain't gonna like this at all!


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[miss n thropy]

If she is really working out, which I highly doubt, then she needs a much better sports bra. I am only a C cup but need a sports bra for a fast walk to be honest.

 

[NotAgain?]

Thanks for the Hello Fresh code!!! When my box arrives I'll post some pictures of me and my bewbs while I'm chopping up some liver and onions 🧅

Could you please also send me a trial pass for David Lloyd gym

 

[MrAllSeeingEye]

Beautiful recap. You’ve found so much to recap when she’s actually done duck all.

So true

And what’s all this “Last chance” discount with her Oily Fans? We all know that’s a blatant lie.

 

[Clickbait]

Thanks for the Hello Fresh code!!! When my box arrives I'll post some pictures of me and my bewbs while I'm chopping up some liver and onions 🧅

Could you please also send me a trial pass for David Lloyd gym

She only visits the car park in reality
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She needs to lay off the sun beds. Her skin is so damaged!

 

[Rita Chevrolet]

Madge is not addicted to filters though

 

[OGJessicaFletcher]

According to Loz we will be regularly updated with TikTok’s of her training with her PT buckle up scrunchies we are in for a treat
A elfee Breakfast by BYG for her & little ALaCarte

 

[Rita Chevrolet]

What is it about these eyebrow things? They look bloody awful!!
You can see where the real brows are and this gunk is paint-rollered over the top. WHY???????????

 

[Clickbait]

I do feel for her if she’s suffering from anxiety and poor mental health, but trying to pretend she is something she is not on a daily basis must surely be adding to her mental load. Filtering every video, photoshopping every photo.

Then there is probably the stress from the impending trial. Obviously we don’t know where fault lies but I guess she was hoping it would be settled out of court and now some things could be revealed that she’d rather not be in the public domain.

She gets no sympathy from the constant moaning about having to wake up with Larose. She has no job, she has a source of income that according to the image she promotes allows her to go out drinking, drive a high end car, have multiple beauty treatments, buy designer labels. Many women run a household AND work full time and cannot afford the time to go to a PT at the drop of a hat let alone the cost of one!

I think she needs to stop making big declarations about these health kicks and just do something consistently. That would free up her time to stop photoshopping a new body for a start!

 

[bluefootedbooby]

Well Scrunchies, let's start the new thread off with BYG "working out" in the wild! She ain't gonna like this at all!


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That first tik tok filter is awful lmao, those short blurry shots.

 

[Notredamn]

That video of her working out is the most I’ve seen her move, ever. Not bad for a sloth! Bet she’s utterly spent now. Back on her bed, starfished. Fag on the go and phone in hand ready to call in a dominoes as she’s earned it

 

[ShowMeThe Money]

She's going to end up looking like Dr Who's Face of Boe if she doesn't stop with the filters & other tit.

 

[A-Soul]

Does anyone else always look forward to thread title/thread title suggestions the most on this thread? The best on Tattle in my estimation.

Pom, any chance of a mock-up of the Shallow Hal movie poster? Chaz looking on whilst BYG is ‘Shallow Ball.’

 

[A-Soul]

I thought u said I smell of tuna….

 

[Cleopops]

Dear lord, is there a potato under that lump of butter and fish?and is there any salad hiding under that avalanche of dressing

 

[Pom Bear]

Does anyone else always look forward to thread title/thread title suggestions the most on this thread? The best on Tattle in my estimation.

Pom, any chance of a mock-up of the Shallow Hal movie poster? Chaz looking on whilst BYG is ‘Shallow Ball.’

Just made xxx..

and yesterday's pic suggestion from @Momohawk made earlier today xxx...

 

[NinaStar90]

This woman has started more businesses, gone on more health kicks, more 'loving myself and being a boss witch' than I've had hot dinner's. I'd say than she has, but she's had more Toby Carvery than I've had hot dinner's.

She never, ever follows through. Her Lauren Tan was actually super popular if I recall. If she had managed to keep that up and not spend on booze, coke and surgery I reckon she actually would be richer than Mark.