Lauren Goodger #58 She a lump, he a tool, poor La'horse freezing in the pool

[Pom Bear]

When I saw that photo the first thing I thought was that he looked like the people who have no legs and have to get about on a skateboard…
View attachment 1240298

This made me laugh so much that I had to try and make two pics trying not to laugh at the same time xx.

 

[Clickbait]

He looks like he's just made of pillows stuffed into clothes with a head balanced on the top.

When I saw that photo the first thing I thought was that he looked like the people who have no legs and have to get about on a skateboard…

 

[Socklicker]

It’s uncanny

 

[xyzcba]

Just have this to say before I catch up;

I'm glad they were able to repurpose the damaged O2 roof elsewhere.

And I knew I'd seen Ch'arg before but couldn't put my finger on it

 

[Clickbait]

So I’ve done a screenshot of the video and then lifted a similar photo from the article. It’s not an exact match but the posing and position are really similar.

Here are the photos side by side:

 

[Blowup80]

He is 24. He looks like he drives a people carrier, drinks bitter only on a Sunday, his hobby is building train sets and his favourite TV show is countdown.

 

[mohawk]

Couldn't help this after the stable references but join in if you can........

Away in a stable, no crib I could beg,
A huge baby coming, Larose needs be fed.
The stars from off Towie, doing better than me-
But wait everybody, I'll be back on TV.

The horse will be neighing, Larose does not wake.
No gas/air for Lozzer. No crying she makes.
'I love you forever' says Ch'arge from backside
And stays by her side until Bisto comes by.

Be near me dear backgrid for photos to take;
Close by me forever, then photoshop fake.
Bless all the dear weirdos paying my Only Fans.
My knicks will keep coming unless I get banned.

Need a piccy Pom heehee

 

[Pom Bear]

My very first Tattle Thread when they first got together mentioned her wanting to make him like Arg so no-one else wanted him
"Lozza and her face so large turned her boyfriend in to Arg"

She has been on a mission to turn the sink wanker in to Roy Cropper from day one

He will have the Roy Cropper bag and jacket next xx

This is the pic from his next interview with OK x

 

[Pom Bear]

That pink dress makes her look like Patrick from SpongeBob ! If only we could change Patrick’s face to BYG’s

Loooool just made xx
His got the same belly button too xx .

Back later

 

[LaSoiDisantDame]

How embarrassing .... she looks like some confused ... overweight old dear, that's on day release from the local loony bin ...... Im pretty certain Odd Bod only came back in order to help ` ROLL ` her everywhere ... I can just imagine how funny it was after that mag shoot ended, and he had to ROLL and hoist her off the floor .... I would have paid good money to be there watching it all

Omg, thanks so much for these pics, I can finally put my finger on who she’s been reminding me of in the white smock thing: it’s Bubbles DeVere !

 

[NotAgain?]

Couldn't help this after the stable references but join in if you can........

Away in a stable, no crib I could beg,
A huge baby coming, Larose needs be fed.
The stars from off Towie, doing better than me-
But wait everybody, I'll be back on TV.

The horse will be neighing, Larose does not wake.
No gas/air for Lozzer. No crying she makes.
'I love you forever' says Ch'arge from backside
And stays by her side until Bisto comes by.

Be near me dear backgrid for photos to take;
Close by me forever, then photoshop fake.
Bless all the dear weirdos paying my Only Fans.
My knicks will keep coming unless I get banned.

Need a piccy Pom heehee

You deserve a Grammy for that. It's bewful

The utter state of it

If I saw that thing lurking outside my house I'd get the dogs in, lock all the doors and call the police. Once he'd been captured, I'd burn sage and get the priest round to do a blessing. And then move house.

 

[minamoon]

I have no words…

 

[Pom Bear]

Couldn't help this after the stable references but join in if you can........

Away in a stable, no crib I could beg,
A huge baby coming, Larose needs be fed.
The stars from off Towie, doing better than me-
But wait everybody, I'll be back on TV.

The horse will be neighing, Larose does not wake.
No gas/air for Lozzer. No crying she makes.
'I love you forever' says Ch'arge from backside
And stays by her side until Bisto comes by.

Be near me dear backgrid for photos to take;
Close by me forever, then photoshop fake.
Bless all the dear weirdos paying my Only Fans.
My knicks will keep coming unless I get banned.

Need a piccy Pom heehee

Here you are xx.

 

[Crowbag]

my little boy is 3 weeks younger. He’s climbing, crawling, standing, cursing furniture. He waved and says ‘iya’. Gives us kisses when we say ‘kiss’. This isn’t a boasting post. I know all children develop at different rates but it’s impossible to not compare when our kids are the same age.

La’orse will be having her one year check with hv soon and the new baby will be having her HV visits so hopefully with more contact from professionals la’orse will get flagged up and signposted help.

i live in Essex too, although more south. There are SO many free / cheap groups available for new mums. Larose hasn’t been to any sensory groups, music groups, stay and play. She’s missing out on so much!

I love the image of him cursing the furniture (excellent typo, thank you!).
Get out of the way you fucking chair, never did like you twat bastard table, etc.

 

[minamoon]

Honestly can’t tell the difference…

 

[ishaggedhughjackman]

Cant believe we have to wait so much longer for the second coming. She's absolutely massive.

Laureen Goodger #59 - Lahorse is filthy and overfed, and Loz wants to give birth in the shed

 

[Silly-old-Slapper]

I took one for the Scrunchies and watched the toy parade so you don't have to. Here's what you missed:

"Loves Cocomelon even though I don't let her watch too much of it"

"A littul phone cos she's obsessed with my phoneS"

"A game thing, needs battries n stuff" as she tosses it to one side

"Sophie the giraffe, she's not very sure of it" perhaps she's never seen animals in books that you read with her every day, oh wait................

"Baby Einstein like ipad, quite kewl, gotta put batteries innit, you press certain fings, it'll do certain fings" Lozza's fat thumb has a go even though got no battwies in Ooh update, there are battwies in, silly baby brian didn't know how to turn it on

"She's talkin but she's not talkin and she's only 9 munfs old"

"Sorry about her clothes, SB gave her breakfast and it's all down her, don't know what it was, yoghurt or somefink"

Gonna show us the toybox layah and where she goddit from

Labored suddenly gets excited and wants to play with soft blocks that apparently she's had since December???

SB's mam seems to have bought her all her existing toys

"she's at a diffrent stage now, now she's 9 munfs so content"

"Loves looking at herself in the mirror, just like her mum"

That's it, off for 2 paracetamol and a lie down in a darkened room

 

[Blowup80]

Thread suggestion
#Come on Lozza get out of bed, must be at least 40 minutes since you were all last fed

 

[NotAgain?]

Jesus, that OK article...

'Troubled, obese family without a pot to piss in give interview about their chaotic lives.'

It's like OK are trolling both them and the public at this point.

 

[Pom Bear]

Oh Pom - definitely one of your best.
I’m howling

0
That's killed me Pom you make me laugh so much .

Pom, this is absolute perfection, I’ve got tears rolling down my face from laughing so much!

@Heneghs you’re a legend for finding that video. Holy fuck are they massive. She’s easily as big now as she was in the street paps with their wind machines photos, although that’s to be expected given she lost none of the weight she gained from baby 1. He looks like he’s been drinking goose fat by the bucket load.

Her sat covered in a white sheet is hilarious - perhaps they told her it would act like a green screen so they could easily photoshop a different body onto her? Or it was a magic sheet that took off 40 pounds? You can see just how much they’ve photoshopped her when you see the video of the same images being taken.

Chaz saying that Larose has learnt so much:
• She can feed herself -
• She can talk… with her hands

Lauren:
• I have a routine but it’s not, like, regimental to every hour, it’s just a rough routine.

Thanks very much for the comments.. Love from Pom xx.

Is Chaz trying to copy the 'Terry Wogan Bulge' pic x

Loooooooooooooooool

Of to catch up ..