Jack Monroe #326 You absolutely reek of bitterness, fantasy and too much time on your hands

[NellieBoo]

Is it a male dog? Do we know? Because when our son wanted a dog and fell in love with a boy pup, OH (he exists) and I sighed and eye rolled because they are much harder to toilet train in our experience. The urge to cock their legs everywhere is really strong and so easy for them! It's much more difficult than spotting the 'sniffing, prepare to squat' of female dogs.

 

[bateman4ever]

*Boys*
*Pal*

GO WELL PAL!!!

 

[Grizzlybear]

I was in the kitchen this morning and GMB was on in the living room. I suddenly became aware of Richard Madeley asking someone if they were a Marxist. I was PRAYING that it was Big Dave he was asking! Sadly dear hearts, it was not

It was big Mick Lynch!

 

[WTFDidIJustSee]

I was watching Superstore earlier, and I'm getting strong Sandra and Jeff vibes from Jack's pretend relationship.

(Sandra goes into great detail about her fictional relationship with Jeff, who is secretly seeing another team member)

Grunking but I am at this - bang on!

 

[Captainmouse]

I flippin' love your moss!

She did a list a while ago of 5 (?) dream jobs in order of dreaminess. One was shelved, one was aborted, had a 'phone call about another, someone spoke to her in a taxi etc. etc. Which one is this, I wonder?

In the meantime I guess it's back to shake, rattle and troll.

Too early!

 

[mchops]

AA helps maximum 20% . I hate the blue book . It's massively flawed .

 

[SlopAmbsase]

Has she molested the entire family? What is wrong with her?

I can totally see her being a far less attractive version of Terrence Stamp’s character in Theorem.

 

[sleepisforwimps]

I'm glad she didn't get a rescue, because the last thing a rescue dog needs is to be placed with someone like Jack. Rescues do need 'forever homes' and can present a lot of challenging behaviours thanks to past trauma

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I'd eat my vegan pigskin hat if this isn't them. That light coloured one is it. £980. Just for the dog.

I bet she doesn't keep up with their yearly injections. Not like cats, Jack. Got to go back every year.

Cats have to have yearly vaccinations too.

 

[trueblue222]

Is it Big Dave getting his MBE?

Big Dave's already completed that (mate).

 

[trueblue222]

As the mystical sky daddy made them he matched them.

Then he broke them apart after one last shag.....

 

[margaretta]

This is what I'm thinking too. She's finally admitted that she can't make it on her own and has shuffled feet Britishly round to ask Daddy for one of his houses. How to brag about it while also playing poor though?! Hmmmm. It'll be draughty, rickety, tiny with only a tea tray balanced on an old boot for a kitchen but it'll be home

If she does, surely then some of the MSM will do a real take down article? I’m sure they’ll find the wiki here a great resource.

 

[Hollaaa]

Meanwhile, in the Guardian: https://www.theguardian.com/busines...ffordability-rules-for-buyers-bank-of-england

 

[Cack Conroe]

Blimey lads, it's been a day hasn't it?

I too found myself starting to feel sorry for her and was genuinely worried for her and feeling guilty for laughing about last night's deleted tweet.

I only popped to Tesco and viola - she's back and as manipulative and self-absorbed as ever.

What was the deleted tweet? I completely missed that. Thankspaceyou x

 

[NellieBoo]

Female.

Well that's a relief with regard to toilet training anyway.

 

[MooBelle]

Strange outfit to wear. What occasion is it best suited for?

At first I thought a funeral, all black. But who would carry a gold handbag with an all black outfit at a funeral. And who photographs people attending such a solemn affair?

Then I thought a wedding. But who would wear all black, including a black fascinator, to a wedding? A bit rude. I could understand it if she were going through a goth faze, but with that hair it looks like a middle aged frump faze.

Why does she always look so bloody out of place in everything she does, and every picture? She always looks like she is playing a part, uncomfortable and never quite knowing who she is. I've never seen a picture of her looking contented just being herself. It's always a persona.

Is it Big Dave getting his MBE?

 

[Krudler]

To be fair, relationship might have been longer than the timeline, I know I wouldn't mention a partner until they were well established. Was there any mysterious tweets before the OH was explicitly mentioned I wonder...

 

[Limey]

View attachment 1360041

‘How To Win Friends and Influence People’

 

[Captainmouse]

Yeah!! She's the Mrs Hinch of pile cream and soap

#thread title

 

[trueblue222]

What were the reasons she gave for her partner leaving? Too soon because of being in recovery?

 

[mchops]

Grunking but I'm glad landlords allow pets now. Was worried about these for years