Jack Monroe #134 Suffer the little squiggles, for I am The Poor

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Why are friends not intervening?
Half of twitter and over a hundred threads here have never stopped her. The last line of defense is a massive “concern-trolling” by asking twitter to go offline for a day so she can have a Dino nap (and so can we)
 
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It has been such a rollercoaster of shit, that i look back with a sort of rose tinted fondness that we all thought she was crackers for trying to get the poor clerk in Barclays to google her tattoos in lieu of ID. For her card?! And was fuming they wouldn’t
 
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I can top that I went to my granny's funeral at a Presbyterian church and someone served orange sandwiches. I wonder if she was there then.

Yes you heard right soft cheap white bread, plenty of butter and a few satsuma segments. I took one to forensically inspect. It got binned a bit later. Sorry god!
 
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I don’t know what @Alansbigplate is on, but since we became patreons there have been...rewards, like there was a Mariah gif. I don’t understand? Since when do you “give” stuff to people who buy things from you?
Am gonna tweet my crying face to Rishi Johnson and Boris Sunak
 
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The Barclays incident is even wilder when you realise that the account she was trying to get money out of wasn't a Barclays account, she was just using their ATM.

She swaggered into the bank and essentially said, "Your ATM just swallowed my Natwest card, give me money from my Natwest account, I'm Jack Monroe and here's a Counting Crows tattoo if you don't believe me."

And the squiggles want her to run for office!
 
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Ahahahahahaha oh my Christ You forget how ridiculous that story was?! And complaining and directly @-ing all round on Twitter like she did with the trains?!!
 
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Sprinkle some sugar and bam! - deconstructed marmalade sandwich
 
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Are there receipts for that here or was it before tattle?
 
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If Jack were to run for office I would so raid my savings for the inevitable crowdfunder. Can you imagine her sad little face, when after much sound and fury, signifying nothing, she loses her deposit? I have hands and would be willing to act as her agent if that would help.
 
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Unsubstantiated hands claims are not allowed.
SM pics or we don't believe you.
 
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