I’ve been ghosted and it HURTS

[absolute-omnishambles]

couple of weeks. He stayed at mine and then we made all these plans….arranged for him to even work from home at my house!!! And then he just went silent on Friday.

block delete and moveeeeee on I reckon, can’t be dealing with it!!

If a man I had known for 2 weeks was trying to work from home at my house- I’d consider that a massive red flag. Way too early to play all domestic like that. Don’t make yourself too available. You are not a men’s refuge.

If you are going to online date, you need to *date*. Where’s the romance? Where’s the anticipation? Why is a 2 week old beau trying to work at your dining table?

 

[judgejohndeed]

God whatever you do don’t message him that. You didn’t do anything wrong, mature adults don’t ghost people, you’ve had a lucky escape. Block and let him think you weren’t bothered anyway, that’ll be more of an ego bruise than anything you could send him

 

[candyland_]

Don’t let your guard down for the first three months is my motto. You’ll always get the best version of them during this time and then the real person starts to show as they can’t keep up the maximum effort.

 

[Milliemilmil]

How long had it been?

couple of weeks. He stayed at mine and then we made all these plans….arranged for him to even work from home at my house!!! And then he just went silent on Friday.

block delete and moveeeeee on I reckon, can’t be dealing with it!!

 

[Milliemilmil]

Why do men lie?! Feel like doing the classic “what did I do wrong?!” Message but I won’t, just suckssssss.

I feel embarrassed!

 

[OnlyHereForTheLolz]

I’m not being rude but you’ve known him two weeks and he’s ignored you.
Count yourself lucky this isn’t months down the line when he did it.

Your ego is more hurt than anything else. Block him and get back to dating

 

[IGiveUp22]

I know it’s easier said than done but this is a HIM problem & not a YOU problem. Take some time to lick your wounds & then forget this man ever existed.

From what you’ve said though, I do think you’ve potentially been love bombed & moved quite quickly. I would potentially, when you’re ready to date again, just try slow things down in the initial stages. I’m also saying this from experience, I got swept up in something that moved way faster than it should & then he changed his mind & had a new girl 2 weeks later

Also, come join us on the dating thread. You don’t have to be actively dating to participate but they’re a lovely bunch & very very supportive!! Xx

 

[rainbowlemon]

When I was younger I was ghosted by someone after 9 months.

I did contact him afterwards and we did start talking again, but I realised that I didn’t trust him to not do it again. He said he didn’t like getting attached to people. Okay good luck with that.

As it’s only been a few weeks count yourself lucky and move on.

 

[Elle Woods]

It's absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with him - says more about his personality than yours that he didn't even have the decency to message you to call things off. Don't be embarrassed and don't waste your time worrying about him either!

 

[leviosa]

H

Why do men lie?! Feel like doing the classic “what did I do wrong?!” Message but I won’t, just suckssssss.

I feel embarrassed!

Honey it's not you. Men do this. I get going into it too fast, I absolutely did the same thing. Loneliness and wanting to find "the one" leads us all into problems. And I really do think some men see and use that. For this one, keep your pride. Don't give him the satisfaction of reaching out. Don't message him. You'll hurt for a little while but it WILL pass.

 

[Babii1234]

I really think you should let this one go. He seems incredibly flaky and I can imagine how confusing and hurtful that would be, but also you seem to want different things anyway so it's never going to work. He's not serious about you and never will be - if he wanted a relationship he would say but he hasn't.

I think he randomly calls you when he's bored and wants some attention, but nothing you have said suggests what you have with him will lead anywhere.

Block him or at least ignore him when he calls again.

Thank you, I just can’t stop thinking about him and wondering if there is someone else and thinking what did I do so wrong? this feeling is awful!

 

[laughing]

Safety - why would you let a man in your house that you don't know from Adam

 

[laughing]

If a man I had known for 2 weeks was trying to work from home at my house- I’d consider that a massive red flag. Way too early to play all domestic like that. Don’t make yourself too available. You are not a men’s refuge.

If you are going to online date, you need to *date*. Where’s the romance? Where’s the anticipation? Why is a 2 week old beau trying to work at your dining table?

Well said!

Get a grip!

 

[candyland_]

How long had it been?

 

[Milliemilmil]

It's absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with him - says more about his personality than yours that he didn't even have the decency to message you to call things off. Don't be embarrassed and don't waste your time worrying about him either!

so true!! He was giving me all this sad spiel about how his ex treated him so badly that communication and loyalty was his number 1 thing

 

[GlassOfBeans]

I felt his mind was probably made up too, but when I tried to end it the week before we saw each other last he called me and told me to stop being stupid so I can’t understand why he wanted to see me again my mind is all over the place x


I know I won’t get any answers, he ignored me when I apologised so I deleted his number there is no way for me to contact him which I am ok with!

Sometimes we don’t get closure and we have to create closure for ourselves so well done for deleting his number. Every time you find yourself thinking about him, think about something else… something you’re looking forward to or something that makes you happy… it sounds stupid, but you need to actively train your mind to not think about him. I have a feeling you will hear from him again, guys like that always get back in touch one way or another, but the best thing to do is build yourself up now so if you do hear from him again, YOU can be strong enough to be the one to ghost HIM

 

[HelloStereo]

Thank you, I just can’t stop thinking about him and wondering if there is someone else and thinking what did I do so wrong? this feeling is awful!

You're probably better off not knowing if there is someone else. I don't think you did anything wrong - the texts probably didn't help but I think his mind was made up before you sent them. Please try not to dwell on it too much as I doubt you will get any answers and you could be putting your mind to much more positive things xx

 

[Babii1234]

You're probably better off not knowing if there is someone else. I don't think you did anything wrong - the texts probably didn't help but I think his mind was made up before you sent them. Please try not to dwell on it too much as I doubt you will get any answers and you could be putting your mind to much more positive things xx

I felt his mind was probably made up too, but when I tried to end it the week before we saw each other last he called me and told me to stop being stupid so I can’t understand why he wanted to see me again my mind is all over the place x

I felt his mind was probably made up too, but when I tried to end it the week before we saw each other last he called me and told me to stop being stupid so I can’t understand why he wanted to see me again my mind is all over the place x

I know I won’t get any answers, he ignored me when I apologised so I deleted his number there is no way for me to contact him which I am ok with!

 

[lotusbiscoff]

Girl don’t feel embarrassed it’s his problem!

1. is he even attractive and interesting enough to miss talking to/being in the company of?
2. do you know him in real life or is it a Tinder/Bumble situation?
3. confront him. It makes them feel really awkward and be assertive. Ghosting is disrespectful - you’re worth better than that.

 

[candyland_]

couple of weeks. He stayed at mine and then we made all these plans….arranged for him to even work from home at my house!!! And then he just went silent on Friday.

block delete and moveeeeee on I reckon, can’t be dealing with it!!

I know it’s shit but at least it hasn’t been long.