Hungermama

[carriebooboo]

I wouldn’t wish a long court battle on anyone, nor want to put kids through it. I also sympathise with someone living in a country they’re not totally happy in. But all this seems to be another manifestation of Bethie’s impulsive behaviour and her continued lack of understanding that the world won’t just bend to meet you. She could have waited another few years, her kids would be well into their teens (even waited till they were done with school) and moved back. She just didn’t want to, but the result is a lot of upset and sadness for her own children.

We don't know what her mental health was/is like, but if there were any way to delay this should definitely should have. She had a 3-bed house in a good area. She probably could have claimed benefits to help with the rent if needed. She could have negotiated with her ex to let her take the kids for summer break in the US to tide her over until they were of age.

Going with the nuclear option is going to financially ruin her unless she has some inheritance or rich parent we don't know about.

 

[Macaron3105]

I imagine she has got legal advice on what would be the best way of securing custody. Maybe her lawyers told her she had a better chance of getting the children if she can demonstrate she has a life, home, support system etc in the US established already? Hence her rushing back there?

 

[gossipygertie]

@aff

I imagine she has got legal advice on what would be the best way of securing custody. Maybe her lawyers told her she had a better chance of getting the children if she can demonstrate she has a life, home, support system etc in the US established already? Hence her rushing back there?

Hmmm unfortunately that doesn’t seem to be working out too well if she can’t hold down a regular job. I wouldn’t describe nannying as a regular stable job.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

Courts are incredibly reluctant to relocate children without very good cause, especially if it drastically reduces contact with the other parent. I know parents who have been denied permission to move 40 miles away. Obviously Bethie can move where she wants as a grown adult, but she’s set herself the most almighty legal hurdle here.

 

[Mgc85]

Were the kids born in the UK? And am I right that they have remained in the UK primarily since she moved? As previous post said, perhaps her MH was in crisis, but this still seems to be have been a highly impulsive and ill thought out move.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

Pretty sure her son was born here and her daughter either was or was a baby when they came. They have grown up here, go to school here, and their father lives here. Obviously none of us (I assume) know the deep details but if there were any serious welfare concerns about her ex, she surely wouldn’t have left the kid with him and gone to the US. So it is really hard to see how on earth you convince a judge that moving to the States is justified - there would seem to be nothing other than proximity to extended family, and how does that outweigh their relaironehip with their father?

 

[GoldSilver]

She’s rushed into relocating like she rushes everything. Doesn’t seem to think things through properly and is ruled by her emotions.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

I can’t believe no lawyer has told her that her desire to go home won’t be enough. In my experience family lawyers (good ones) are fairly brutal about what outcomes are realistic and why.

 

[rainbowlemon]

I think both were born here. The oldest will be 13 on boxing day.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

It’s what every 13 year old dreams of, isn’t it? Their mother pissing off thousands of miles away for self fulfilment. Poor kids.

 

[gossipygertie]

It’s what every 13 year old dreams of, isn’t it? Their mother pissing off thousands of miles away for self fulfilment. Poor kids.

If she just left it another few years until the oldest was 15 or 16 the kids would have more say and influence in where they live.
Or maybe that’s why she’s doing it now because they don’t want to move.

 

[Miss Anne Thrope]

So the summary of the situation from the content you get to when you subscribe is…

1. She has COVID
2. She is locked in an expensive and aggressive international custody battle, which will end up being managed through a UK court. The court hearing is taking place soon. Her lawyers representing her are in the UK.
3. The kids are going out to US over half term and for Christmas too. She came over to London to see them recently but it cost her thousands so she can’t make trips like that very often.
4. She no longer has a job…she was let go from the Marketing job she had and is now nannying.
5. She’s living on an island near Seattle in her friend’s guest house. Apparently she is looking to buy somewhere and is making good progress on this. Not exactly sure how when she doesn’t have a regular income.
6. Lots of chat about toxic relationships, toxic ex blah blah blah.

We kinda guessed all this! It figures

 

[carriebooboo]

Were the kids born in the UK? And am I right that they have remained in the UK primarily since she moved? As previous post said, perhaps her MH was in crisis, but this still seems to be have been a highly impulsive and ill thought out move.

Daughter was born in the US: https://gasandair.wordpress.com/tag/waters-breaking.

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

MoD’s blog there of course.
---
Scummy Mummy Helen is also on there.

 

[hattie20]

MoD’s blog there of course.
---
Scummy Mummy Helen is also on there.

Oh god, it was all one big circle wank wasn’t it?

Way to duck up your kids, leaving them to go back home. No matter how she frames it, they are going to feel abandoned. I’m not British. I would like to go home one day, but honestly, I don’t even think it would be easy to move half way across the world from my children once they were adults. I couldn’t imagine leaving them at her children’s ages.

 

[Macaron3105]

So there’s a few updates on the subscriber content…

1.Custody court hearing is taking place in March. She feels confident that she will win and the kids will move to US permanently.
2. Kids have just arrived for 2 weeks half term break (flew out there alone) and will be spending all of Christmas in the US with her.
3. Her parents have sold their house and are moving to Vashon Island, which is where she’s living (in her friend’s house) currently. She will be moving in with them and it has enough space for the kids to live with them too.

Crazy that she might actually get full custody of them…!

 

[Affiliatemebaby]

I guess we’ll see.

 

[carriebooboo]

Thanks for the update. Wonder if anyone has asked the kids what they want? Hard to imagine it's that...

 

[Mgc85]

A new podcast. Cripes.

 

[Tittattattit]

So how was it decided that the kids be with their dad in the UK, while she is in the US, in the interim of the court hearing taking place next year?