Holly Gabrielle #5 Still lives like a nun, doesn't allow herself any fun

[CalatheaLater]

Thank you @treasuredintention for the thread title suggestion! You had 2 titles in your comment so I just chose the first one.

Little recap of the last thread:

Holly has started her research project at UCL and has signed up to run the London Marathon. She has also posted a lot more personal videos including "questions I've always avoided" and her "period story", all of these videos are still suggesting that she is in denial about her health. She is also trying to move away from her studing all the time Cambridge persona and has started a series on following other peoples morning routines.

Anything else to add?

Just realised I accidentally put this thread in the Instagrammer section not influencer Anyone know how to change it?

 

[Yel]

Just realised I accidentally put this thread in the Instagrammer section not influencer Anyone know how to change it?

Report it Thanks for the person that did. Moved now

 

[hpprotego]

Soon to come on hollys channel should also be her ‘updated eating disorder story’ or ‘how I changed my mindset’.

Holly continues to convince herself she’s ‘fully recovered’ because she’s gained her period back. Her body is exactly as it should be and she doesn’t want it to change any more (what a red flag).

We have also learned that Holly has actually had some pretty disordered thoughts throughout Cambridge even though she labelled herself as fully recovered and happy and healthy. This we now know is far from the truth.

What’s more is we don’t know if she’s telling the truth now.Holly is training for the London Marathon so….. will she spiral??

 

[sleepypasta]

I really hope she doesn’t do another eating disorder video. Her first one that she posted ages ago still has “WITH PICTURES” in the title I don’t have an eating disorder related struggles but I can imagine that watching a video that includes photos from someone in the middle of an eating disorder is not helpful.

 

[treasuredintention]

I'm getting off vibes from her posting those photos of her younger self... that dancing video gave me chills they both looked so unwell especially their arms...

 

[hazel1]

I didn't think bone density loss was reversible....? Please do correct me if I'm wrong but she should probably go get a bone density scan because seven years without a period would have a dramatic effect on her bone density. I think you need to be on medication to try and rebuild?

 

[CalatheaLater]

ANOTHER binge eating video

I'll summarise here for people who don't want to sit through the whole video (definitely TW below for binge eating/disordered eating/eating habits/body image)

• A re-hash of her (now deleted video from Jan) becuase she thinks it's useful, and wants to do the information justice and she feels she has grown since then. Puts in disclaimer that she's not a professional but has done a lot of reading (peer reviewed research not just random internet pages) around binge eating since her last video. Also recommends her viewers seek medical help if needed.
  [*]Goes back to when she was binge eating and says she was under eating in the day, which led to her binging in the evening. At the time of her old video she hadn't accepted that she wasn't eating enough. She has now accepted that she wasn't eating enough at the time.
  [*]She then summarises the different causes of binge eating from the papers she has read.
  [*]In the years previous (at Cambrige and in Aus) she always ate more at night time, and when she was binge eating she felt like her body was trying to kick start her in terms of the hormonal cycle, but she was ignoring those bodily ques.
  [*]Her bloating also led to bad body image and she didn't like it, leading to a bad cycle
  [*]She realised she had to start eating more protien and fats to stop the binging, and eat in the morning when she wasn't hungry
  [*]She admits that her previous advice of "slowing down" is not the ultimate solution when you're still not eating enough
  [*]She is planning more videos like this one, including her period story

 

[emmer_moans]

She's still undereating though, she still seems malnourished It's like she is semi aware but still doesn't understand she needs more fats, carbs and protein.

 

[Griftwood]

ANOTHER binge eating video

I'll summarise here for people who don't want to sit through the whole video (definitely TW below for binge eating/disordered eating/eating habits/body image)

• A re-hash of her (now deleted video from Jan) becuase she thinks it's useful, and wants to do the information justice and she feels she has grown since then. Puts in disclaimer that she's not a professional but has done a lot of reading (peer reviewed research not just random internet pages) around binge eating since her last video. Also recommends her viewers seek medical help if needed.
  [*]Goes back to when she was binge eating and says she was under eating in the day, which led to her binging in the evening. At the time of her old video she hadn't accepted that she wasn't eating enough. She has now accepted that she wasn't eating enough at the time.
  [*]She then summarises the different causes of binge eating from the papers she has read.
  [*]In the years previous (at Cambrige and in Aus) she always ate more at night time, and when she was binge eating she felt like her body was trying to kick start her in terms of the hormonal cycle, but she was ignoring those bodily ques.
  [*]Her bloating also led to bad body image and she didn't like it, leading to a bad cycle
  [*]She realised she had to start eating more protien and fats to stop the binging, and eat in the morning when she wasn't hungry
  [*]She admits that her previous advice of "slowing down" is not the ultimate solution when you're still not eating enough
  [*]She is planning more videos like this one, including her period story

I’ll award her half a point for having made a move at least vaguely in the right direction with this.

Withdrawing said half-point, though, for the little shoutout she gave to ”hate comments” being one of the reasons she felt stressed at the time she was binge eating. Valid criticism is not hate, Holly. Give it an actual listen sometime and take it on board, and you may find youself making some real progress.

 

[coconut432]

 

[NotAnArtist]

It's better than the last video imo but I still thought she was missing the point at times. The video felt as though Holly is trying very hard to rationalize these binges. She kepy coming back to how she age so much in the evenings because she didn't during the day and I kept going like... okay, but what's at the core of the issue here? With her mentioning stress and anxiety, too, I just felt like she was showing us all these relevant dots and then didn't connect them at all.

Though I also want to say that, if this is one of those places Holly read comments that made her feel poorly: In all honesty, I'm here because I live vicariously through other people and three consecutive lockdowns have left me with little to talk about. There are some decent comments here, and a bunch of stuff that isn't worth giving a second thought to. I like Holly, I admire her work ethic (if not how that ethic is put into practice), and hope she does better now.

 

[xoxoxo13]

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I can only hope she'll give the same reply to people who compliment her on her figure when she's skinny too.

 

[meweme]

Though I also want to say that, if this is one of those places Holly read comments that made her feel poorly: In all honesty, I'm here because I live vicariously through other people and three consecutive lockdowns have left me with little to talk about. There are some decent comments here, and a bunch of stuff that isn't worth giving a second thought to. I like Holly, I admire her work ethic (if not how that ethic is put into practice), and hope she does better now.

Yeah, of course the comments here aren't for her to consider, because a gossip thread about your person is never the place where you should look for positive feedback or when you aren't stable enough.

In all honesty, I love this thread and I might be a little "triggered", but I quite appreciate the thoughtful and considerate comments many people post on here.

Holly keeps on posting content that is harmful for her young viewers on so many levels (ED, productivity, dealing with issues) and she doesn't give a single damn about it, even if they are pointed out to her repeatedly. Every time she tackles ED-stuff people in the comment section point out to her, why and how the way she deals with those topics is harmful for vulnerable viewers. And she explicitly doesn't give a damn, telling people to "just watch other content".

So I refuse to censor my comments on here in case she's reading. People here raise valid points. She should get help and stop using her platform and her viewers as a weird therapy.

 

[Moomootown]

Her binge eating video, damn she really needs to see a therapist, no way is she better in such a short amount of time without one

 

[nbx512]

I didn't think bone density loss was reversible....? Please do correct me if I'm wrong but she should probably go get a bone density scan because seven years without a period would have a dramatic effect on her bone density. I think you need to be on medication to try and rebuild?

No you can rebuild bone density Diet plays a factor (calcium), bit D from sunshine, doing weigh bearing activity like strength training but also having sufficient hormones that contribute to bone density. The last one does sometimes need medication in the form of hormone replacement therapy.

 

[hazel1]

No you can rebuild bone density Diet plays a factor (calcium), bit D from sunshine, doing weigh bearing activity like strength training but also having sufficient hormones that contribute to bone density. The last one does sometimes need medication in the form of hormone replacement therapy.

Oh, nice!! I was underweight and lost my period for 2 years and I got a dexa scan and had lost a lot of bone density - it was really scary... My doctor told me it wasn't reversible and I would have to do weights + take supplements. I was so scared I haven't gone back for another dexa scan since but now I might!

 

[nbx512]

Oh, nice!! I was underweight and lost my period for 2 years and I got a dexa scan and had lost a lot of bone density - it was really scary... My doctor told me it wasn't reversible and I would have to do weights + take supplements. I was so scared I haven't gone back for another dexa scan since but now I might!

Not sure what country you're in but I'd recommend seeing a gynocologist who specialises in endocrine issues (that's what I see at least). I've been able to improve on my bone density from having borderline osteoporosis to being on the low end of normal. It's taken years and a lot of careful management on my part but it can be done.

Also the way DEXA scans work is if they're not done on the same machine the results simply aren't comparable so keep this in mind when you book.

BTW I'm not a Dr just speaking from my own experience

 

[teflonpanda]

Oh that's really interesting, thank you for explaining! But since you said it's taken you years to get it back to normal, I just hope that Holly is aware of this. I mean, she's had no period for seven (!) years, which is crazy, and now she's had it back for one year so uh. That seems bad. It's honestly weird how chipper she is about all this in her recent videos. It's all "yes I had an eating disorder but look at me! I'm doing so great now!! I'm so fine!!" I just hope she's not lying to herself (again).

 

[xoxoxo13]

Oh that's really interesting, thank you for explaining! But since you said it's taken you years to get it back to normal, I just hope that Holly is aware of this. I mean, she's had no period for seven (!) years, which is crazy, and now she's had it back for one year so uh. That seems bad. It's honestly weird how chipper she is about all this in her recent videos. It's all "yes I had an eating disorder but look at me! I'm doing so great now!! I'm so fine!!" I just hope she's not lying to herself (again).

she's the queen of self deception and denial

 

[CalatheaLater]

Does anyone else find the wording of this a bit off? "I should've sorted it sooner" idk it sounds like she's talking about paying a late utility bill, not recovering from binge eating