Helen Anderson #13 please read! ClutchandNOPE!

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ekl2000

If she’s talking to her therapist about anything other than Tattle then I’m cancelling my direct debit. Cheeky mare.
 
Reactions: 49

luckyblue

I gained about 2 stone in the first lockdown out of sheer panic, I was nervous eating all day and then drinking almost every evening. I’ve lost it all since, as I’ve gone back to eating normally, and dealt with the stress in healthier ways.
I don’t blame any normal people for having a tough time coping with the pandemic because if you don’t have a high income, or job security, or you have rent/mortgages to cover, kids to take care of, or all of that and more, the pandemic is a huge stress. But Helen needs to stop with the fake relatability, you’re not in the same position as the rest of us. I honestly prefer watching influencers who are upfront about their wealth and understand that they’re in a different bracket to their viewers, and know how to be grateful for the position they’re in.
 
Reactions: 44

rivers

Right? Like fair play about fucking up, we all make mistakes and I'm not expecting Helen to be perfect (at this point, I'd have to be deaf and blind to do that tbh). But why do we need so many stories and a whole post dedicated to how she didn't correctly follow the instructions on her skincare? You don't need to be perfect, just take some responsibility for your actions and don't expect praise for being ~* rEaL *~ for everything.

(added)
This could have been one post: 'Chaotic Valentines Day night, managed to chip my tooth and misapply my retinol. Might not be posting new face/makeup pics until I've sorted them out. Being an influencer doesn't mean you're perfect, we all make mistakes. Dm me if you have tips on calming my skin.' Bang, done. Doesn't need to be milked for all its worth.
 
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rivers

Decided to look at the comments on Helen's latest post and jesus, is this person watching the same thing as the rest of us?

Also, so many people praising her for 'being real'? Jesus. There's a line between honesty and just being an arse...

Edit: Actually, can anyone on this thread recommend any influencers they actually think are 'real'? I can literally only think of Sammi Jefcoate and she's much more private so there isn't as much content to enjoy.
 

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luckyblue

I was actually just thinking today about how the YouTubers I still enjoy are more “content creators” than influencers. I would not put Helen in that category. I think a content creator is someone who’s main focus is to make you laugh, or teach you something new, or start a discussion about something, and while that may include an ad at the beginning or end, it’s not the focus of the video.
 
Reactions: 44

Tyla73

95% of Helen’s Insta content is #ad, #gifted or ‘swipe up’. Her main focus is getting people to spend money on tat they don‘t need - she’s an influencer. Her ‘content creation’ (vlogs, reels etc) is so low standard and boring she may as well not bother any more. Anything that requires any kind of work or effort is something she just can’t be bothered with. I’d love to know why she doesn’t ‘tutor’ any more.
 
Reactions: 37

FKAcigs

Kiera Rose is awesome. Buys stuff from charity shops, lives a normal, humble life. Talks about mental health sometimes. Super chill, super normal, has the same amount of money as most of us reading this do and doesn't try to act flashy, she also really appreciates the important things in life and there are videos of hers pre-covid where she'd be really excited about a cute plate she got from a charity shop. Polar opposite of Helen.
 
Reactions: 40
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TaylorSlattery

Off topic, sorry!

I love Kiera
She’s so creative and talented. I’d do bad things to have her beautiful hair. I also love that she doesn’t get all preachy and shove Veganism down your throat. Her tattoos are
 
Reactions: 23
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Teasipper1

Kiera Rose is lovely. She’s very pleasant to watch Also.. very jealous of her hair. I love watching thrift hauls on YouTube. So much better than all this gifted #ad crap.
 
Reactions: 22

rivers

I follow her on IG but I totally forgot her YT was a thing. Thank you! She's always been lovely but seems like she's really blossomed since having her daughter and is a fantastic mother to her, a genuine sweetheart tbh.
 
Reactions: 14
K

Kit123

I've only watched a few of her videos but she had a baby a little while before me so I watched her pregnancy ones. Loved how she spoke about her post labour story and how real it was!
 
Reactions: 11

luckyblue

rivers said:
Edit: Actually, can anyone on this thread recommend any influencers they actually think are 'real'? I can literally only think of Sammi Jefcoate and she's much more private so there isn't as much content to enjoy.
Click to expand...
My favourite at the moment is Cat Creature, her videos are very chill and relaxing, her videos are very casual but there’s clear effort and thought in the way she presents the videos. She has an office job on the side, I just find her videos very relaxing! Maybe not for everyone though.
 
Reactions: 10

SpookyLumberjack

Tyla73 said:
New video up from Helga - ‘My Boyfriend Does My Makeup’. Clickbait for the under 18s right?
Click to expand...
It was barely watchable but I was getting through it until she went to kiss him, JESUS CHRIST he was not into that. She needs to keep him off camera.
 
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Lunamoon22

VIDEO SUMMARY: MY BOYFRIEND DOES MY MAKEUP, A DECLUTTER AND AN EXCITING REVEAL!!!!!!

THURSDAY 11TH FEB
Getting ready to take the dogs for a walk

Yells at the dishwasher for not cleaning the plates

She's going to sort out her skincare and have a declutter (aka not use anything she already has up, it's probably going to go straight in the bin)





She's been out for her walk, has eaten some fruit loaf and now she's on her way upstairs to sort out the dressing room.

There are always clothes everywhere, but that's just her "making content"



The current "situ" in the dressing room is that she takes shit out of the drawers and then shoves it back in.

She grabs handfuls of clothes and dumps it all over the floor.



Mentions that she loves it when Grace use to come over and FOLD HER CLOTHES FOR HER.

Helen chuckles, "she loved to fold"

She's talking us through how she's making piles of different types of clothes

She talks about having a "shit-kicker" drawer, which is basically comfy clothing. This is a phrase made up by her dad.

She keeps finding shit she didn't know she had.

She goes through her band tee drawer and reads out all the bands she has. She pronounces Lynyrd Skynyrd in a quirky way, she also has a lot of Aerosmith tees.

Says that Fil's terrible at putting clothes away. She has to mother him and tells him to pick things up off the floor.

Says that he's a good boy and that when she asks him to do something he'll grunt about it, but will do it in the end. What a good Kirby Egg.

Helga would love to open a shop one day which sells band tees and records and candles. "JUST A KEWL SHOP"

Lists more things she could sell.... tableware.... homeware...

Dressing table time.



She cuts to later and says it's taken her so much longer than she thought. She's already had her lunch break.

"It's not a particularly busy week this week."

She shows off her clean makeup drawer... THAT CRUSTY, DIRTY BEAUTY BLENDER



She's showing off what she's done and she's breathing heavily into the chin mic whilst the camera wobbles around.

FRIDAY 12TH FEB
She picks up a parcel from the front door, lets the dogs out of their dungeon and yells good morning as she lets them out for a wee.... what time is it?! It looks like mid-morning!!!




Butt shots.


She's excited today, she's got to edit some videos and get ready for her Sunny Bones prints.

Shows the camera her new hairy dick mug.

She's on the phone and planning to go out to pick up the prints



She's back and says she's been "zipping about all day" but finally has the prints in her clutches.



Says when she wrote the song initially it was about ".....something else" (lol, it was about Mark)



But because people are saying to her how it's soooo relevant right now she thought "oh... this would be really nice on a print"


Bald patch check

She probably would only be able to send them to the UK "coz of Brexit and shit"

If you're outside the UK and REALLY, REALLY want one then DM her so she can sort you out privately

She's trying to figure out where to put it....



.....in the bin would look better.


SUNDAY 14TH FEB

Totally not going to show us any of Saturday... wonder why??

She greets Filwhipped and says "LOOK WOT I DID!"



That's right she's been to the shop and put things on a plate. Amazing.

"WOW!" says Fil, "Shall we eat?" No, you fucking lemon, just keep standing there looking at it

Cut to her running baby Fil a bath "Fil wants a barf. He neva as a barf."



All the arse shots as she bends over to dust out her leg hair from a previous bath.



She's done a Lush order and bought some lips



She's showing off all her other bath shit she got from Lush



Cut to Helga running out of breath getting up the stairs. She bought Fil a tea and a doughnut while he bathes "But if you don't want it... that's okay"

She fusses over Fil, telling him what she put in his bath, asks him if the temperature is okay.

Cut to the sofa of nightmares and Helga asking Fil what's just happened on TV. They've spent all day sitting watching TV.



Helga wants Fil to help her go get ready for dinner.

But first, she needs to update us on what happened last night (is this the EXCITING REVEAL part that she wrote in her title?!)

Oh, it's just her talking about how she "sipped on some water" and chipped her tooth.




She splutters out a wheezing laugh


Now this "toof" was already chipped. When she was 17 she had a lip piercing "right here" she points to her old labret piercing



She then explains that because they pierced her with a longer bar just in case of swelling, one day she ate food and bit down on the bar and chipped her tooth



"I WOZ TERRIFIED. THERE WAS A BIG DRAMA IN THE HOUSE THAT NIGHT!!!"

Anyway, she's going to call the dentist tomorrow.

It's now time for greasy haired FILWHIPPED to do her make up



"It's Valentine's day," she says to Fil,

"It is" he replies. Well done, you can both look at the calendar.

"...and we're having a date night at home" Helga continues unenthused

She list off food "Steak, sandwiches... mmm"

"mmmm" copies Fil.



"I fort it wood be fun if you did me make up tonight"

Fil snots out a laugh then goes "alright"

"THIS IS TAKING IT BACK. THIS IS SUCH A CLASSIC YOUTUBE FING"

Fil adjusts his pinky ring



Helga wants to bring out the green screen and have cupids in the background



Fil doesn't know where to start, Helga has previously said that there are no instructions but has fallen at the first hurdle and has instantly instructed Fil to use foundation.



Fil fingers her brushes and rubs them all over his face...



Fil can't remember which hand he is "I'm right-handed" he remembers.

Wisdom from Fil "YOU CAN ALWAYS PUT MORE ON, BUT YOU CAN'T TAKE IT OFF..... WELL, I MEAN... YOU CAN TAKE IT OFF" Put that on a poster, folks.

As we get a close up of Fil's greasy locks, we see Helga's smitten little face loving his hands all over her. Maybe this was all a trick to get closer to his face without him bolting or looking disgusted.



She moans that he's being quite heavy-handed. I am howling at how rough he is with her. It's like all that pent up aggression of being bossed about and forced to kiss her is being unleashed.

Helen's groaning, I don't know if this is pleasure or pain for her... probably a bit of both. Either way, it's uncomfortable to watch and listen to.

Fil's trying to figure out how to open the concealer, and Helga randomly pushes her face into him



Now he's sponging her down



Fil's taking a sniff of her blusher. Helga lets out a wheeze.



He tells her to pucker her lips, Helga leans into him - hoping for a snog, but Fil's leaning back



"you've been here before haven't you," asks Helga



The camera is so out of focus, what is the point of this if we can't see it??

Helga is still instructing Filwhip on what to do.

Fil doesn't know where to start or when to stop

Helen shoves a finger up her nose and giggles "HEHEHE YOU DO WOTEVA YOU LIKE FIL"

"MY FACE IS YOUR CANVAS." Says Helga. (giggidy)

Fil's on the eyeliner now, but Helga is bored. She's thinking about food. "Fil, can you cook the steak and I cook the potatoes?"



Fil the whiffer sniffer takes a break from doing Helga's lips to sniff the lipstick



And Fil's done



She has a look, the camera goes out of focus but we get an awesome shot of her filthy mirror



She's not happy with Fil not going to her lash line





Fil asks if he can go now. She whines about really wanting to do eyeshadow on him (like she did for Maff) Fil gives her a stern "NO. BYE BYE" and gives her an awkward peck.

Then they drink wine. The end.
 
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A

Adoraborealis

rivers said:
Edit: Actually, can anyone on this thread recommend any influencers they actually think are 'real'? I can literally only think of Sammi Jefcoate and she's much more private so there isn't as much content to enjoy.
Click to expand...
Livvrh is Norwich based and an absolute sweetheart.
 
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TaylorSlattery

I wonder if he said “is this lame” before filming this video
How old is she and secondly how old does she think her viewers are?! I’ve really noticed the influencers that are past their expiry date because they just keep churning out content that was only relevant 5 years ago. I haven’t even watched it yet and I’m cringing at the thought.
 
Reactions: 24

Tyla73

SpookyLumberjack said:
It was barely watchable but I was getting through it until she went to kiss him, JESUS CHRIST he was not into that.
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I’ve deleted my comment somehow, no idea how but I will inflict watching it on myself at some point this evening. It just seems like a very teenage type of video to me, not something a 30 year old alternative queen would do.

Theres going to be loads of “you guys are so cute together/I want a Phil/couple goals“ comments aren’t there
 
Reactions: 16
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