Good afternoon Harry.
Your father has instructed me to tell you that he is pleased to offer you a royal residence for you and your family on the next visit.
Your previous home Frogmore Cottage is still vacant and he thought you might like to stay there to remember those first happy days of your marriage.
Unfortunately there has been some remodelling done recently so not all rooms are suitable but there will be adequate living space and two bedrooms.
It is currently unfurnished but the army have generously offered some camp beds and cooking equipment to remind you of your days in active service.
yours sniggeringly
secretary to his very very gracious majesty!
An addendum to that,he also said you are a gross,grimy,ginger,
harmless gremlin, your Ma shagged Hewitt and you are the result not a Prince just a
b offspring of a knee trembler
Your Wife is an
weird, boney old bint, she has shagged half of Hollyweird and has a
fan that stretches from London to California and sucks like a sludge gulper
Welcome to the UK ya
bleeping fuckwit and may your earholes turn to arseholes and crap at random all over you