All that glistens isn’t goldI agree with all of this.
FTEN was the first account I went off on Instagram.
when you follow for relatable reasons and then up pops a random M&S dinner party or those outrageous £400 bedsheets (swipe up for 20% off) absolutely shocking Imo!
I was pretty surprised, too, especially being on the receiving end. It was shocking. I'm not under any illusions, some of these women are true 'mean girls', you see glimmers of it now and then... but I did think Elle was one of the good ones. I was shooketh.I feel surprised she’s behaved like this
Thanks for sharing I didn’t know how toNew thread for Elle is here
Excellent!New thread for Elle is here
New thread for Feathering the Empty Nest started see this page. It’s not a rave pageI was pretty surprised, too, especially being on the receiving end. It was shocking. I'm not under any illusions, some of these women are true 'mean girls', you see glimmers of it now and then... but I did think Elle was one of the good ones. I was shooketh.
Thank you to everyone who was kind re: my own personal situation. I was really lucky to finally have my rainbow baby three years ago and I cherish her. I never take for granted that I am one of the lucky ones as I know so many people who are still waiting to bring home a living child. The grief you suffer is profound and life altering. I really admired Elle for sharing her experiences in a constructive way in her book, on her blog, and on her social media. She had a positive impact on my life when I felt my lowest. It is always painful to have your bubble burst about someone. But as the saying goes, when someone shows you who they are, believe them. Elle showed me who she is. All the ravers here can think otherwise, but this has been my own personal experience and you cannot diminish that with your "sorry you perceived this as rude" bullshit. If I had been at a different place in life, she would have crushed me that day with her rude response. Women who are grieving lost children are PROFOUNDLY VULNERABLE. She should know better!! Just shut you gob if you don't want to respond. Don't be a dick!!
Here's the thing about following these people, like many of you, I have a small account, it's private as I post things about my children and life in general and I'm concerned about safety and privacy. I followed maybe 15 or so of the bigger accounts, and I followed them for years. I wasn't influenced to spend money I didn't have or to go on diets or drink detox teas or anything crazy or toxic like that, but I did feel a small connection to them. You're invested when you're seeing someone every single day via their grid and stories. The algorithms make it so you often see those big accounts first, before you even see your real life friends and family, so you're pushed into consuming their life every day and that matters. It's good for them, as they can monetize that engagement, and well done them, but it isn't healthy for the people who follow them and are cast aside like an old shoe for no reason at all. Like I said, I do not feel ENTITLED to anyone's content, I don't want just anyone to have access to my content, but that is VERY different from being excluded by being blocked by a dozen accounts all at once. It's textbook bullying, plain and simple. I know this to be true because I work with children and the affects of bullying are profound and pretty intense, even for adults. Exclusion like that is bullying. Instagram is part of most of our daily lives, so the impact of being "blacklisted" matters. When a mass blocking takes place and suddenly all of the accounts you used to see and interact with every single day disappear it can cause you to feel very upset and to question yourself, "what did I do?" "why have they done this to me?" "I have always been so nice and supportive to them". The reality is, they hate their followers if they aren't kissing their ass, and if they aren't translating to cold hard cash and freebies, those followers can fuck right off. My experience with these huns isn't unique. It is easy to see this in how everyone acted when MOD had her fall from grace. They all kissed her ass for years, she was the queen bee of the instahuns. At the first whiff of trouble those bitches jumped ship like their life depended on it. They weren't going to lose their faux upper class lives for MOD, oh no they weren't. Most of these women are from working class backgrounds and would otherwise be living working class lives if they hadn't figured out how to manipulate women on Instagram. The things they have have not come to them through hard work, those things have come to them because they are "popular" in the artificial world of the internet. They can masquerade as upper class twits because of all those freebies, the $400 sheets, the fancy BB makeup, the Jo Malone perfume, they wouldn't be able to afford those things in real life. And you can bet your tits that they're not going to lose that for a pretend friend on the internet.
There are a few big accounts I still follow and interact with and they are always incredibly kind to me, so I still follow them, apparently they didn't get the memo that I'm a dangerous grieving mother who should be blocked. Elle treated me poorly, so now I judge her by those actions and that seems more than fair. If it walks like an asshole and talks like an asshole, it is, in fact, an asshole. If she's been all peaches and cream to you, by all means, keep following her and talking about her like she's some sort of patron saint of grieving mothers, but quite a few of us have had very different experiences with her and she ain't no saint. She's just another mean girl instahun grasping at free shit and ain't nobody gonna get in the way of that, especially not some stupid grieving woman, like me, who wanted to share how much of a positive impact your book had on her life. Just think about that for one minute and let it sink in. If you still think she's perfect Elle, well then you're a perfect fool.
Bravo, lady. Bravo.I was pretty surprised, too, especially being on the receiving end. It was shocking. I'm not under any illusions, some of these women are true 'mean girls', you see glimmers of it now and then... but I did think Elle was one of the good ones. I was shooketh.
Thank you to everyone who was kind re: my own personal situation. I was really lucky to finally have my rainbow baby three years ago and I cherish her. I never take for granted that I am one of the lucky ones as I know so many people who are still waiting to bring home a living child. The grief you suffer is profound and life altering. I really admired Elle for sharing her experiences in a constructive way in her book, on her blog, and on her social media. She had a positive impact on my life when I felt my lowest. It is always painful to have your bubble burst about someone. But as the saying goes, when someone shows you who they are, believe them. Elle showed me who she is. All the ravers here can think otherwise, but this has been my own personal experience and you cannot diminish that with your "sorry you perceived this as rude" bullshit. If I had been at a different place in life, she would have crushed me that day with her rude response. Women who are grieving lost children are PROFOUNDLY VULNERABLE. She should know better!! Just shut you gob if you don't want to respond. Don't be a dick!!
Here's the thing about following these people, like many of you, I have a small account, it's private as I post things about my children and life in general and I'm concerned about safety and privacy. I followed maybe 15 or so of the bigger accounts, and I followed them for years. I wasn't influenced to spend money I didn't have or to go on diets or drink detox teas or anything crazy or toxic like that, but I did feel a small connection to them. You're invested when you're seeing someone every single day via their grid and stories. The algorithms make it so you often see those big accounts first, before you even see your real life friends and family, so you're pushed into consuming their life every day and that matters. It's good for them, as they can monetize that engagement, and well done them, but it isn't healthy for the people who follow them and are cast aside like an old shoe for no reason at all. Like I said, I do not feel ENTITLED to anyone's content, I don't want just anyone to have access to my content, but that is VERY different from being excluded by being blocked by a dozen accounts all at once. It's textbook bullying, plain and simple. I know this to be true because I work with children and the affects of bullying are profound and pretty intense, even for adults. Exclusion like that is bullying. Instagram is part of most of our daily lives, so the impact of being "blacklisted" matters. When a mass blocking takes place and suddenly all of the accounts you used to see and interact with every single day disappear it can cause you to feel very upset and to question yourself, "what did I do?" "why have they done this to me?" "I have always been so nice and supportive to them". The reality is, they hate their followers if they aren't kissing their ass, and if they aren't translating to cold hard cash and freebies, those followers can fuck right off. My experience with these huns isn't unique. It is easy to see this in how everyone acted when MOD had her fall from grace. They all kissed her ass for years, she was the queen bee of the instahuns. At the first whiff of trouble those bitches jumped ship like their life depended on it. They weren't going to lose their faux upper class lives for MOD, oh no they weren't. Most of these women are from working class backgrounds and would otherwise be living working class lives if they hadn't figured out how to manipulate women on Instagram. The things they have have not come to them through hard work, those things have come to them because they are "popular" in the artificial world of the internet. They can masquerade as upper class twits because of all those freebies, the $400 sheets, the fancy BB makeup, the Jo Malone perfume, the free furniture and flooring and cabinets, they wouldn't be able to afford those things in real life. And you can bet your tits that they're not going to lose that for a pretend friend on the internet.
There are a few big accounts I still follow and interact with and they are always incredibly kind to me, so I still follow them, apparently they didn't get the memo that I'm a dangerous grieving mother who should be blocked. Elle treated me poorly, so now I judge her by those actions and that seems more than fair. If it walks like an asshole and talks like an asshole, it is, in fact, an asshole. If she's been all peaches and cream to you, by all means, keep following her and talking about her like she's some sort of patron saint of grieving mothers, but quite a few of us have had very different experiences with her and she ain't no saint. She's just another mean girl instahun grasping at free shit and ain't nobody gonna get in the way of that, especially not some stupid grieving woman, like me, who wanted to share how much of a positive impact your book had on her life. Just think about that for one minute and let it sink in. If you still think she's perfect Elle, well then you're a perfect fool.
I am so sorry to hear about this; although it doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. I get a very unpleasant, smug vibe about her and I just don’t get the fan-girling at all. Yes, she’s attractive, middle-class and wealthy.. inspirational to some, but there’s definitely a picture being built up here. You are one of many women who have had the door slammed in their face and it’s a power thing. The behaviour of these groups is evident of that.I'm not surprised she has a book coming out, she's been dipping her feet back into instagram for a bit commenting on people's posts, and lo and behold, she's got something to promote. I get that Elle has done a lot of good and that is meaningful (I shan't take that away from her), I don't expect or feel entitled to anyone's content (that's bananas to think that) but she was rude to me and it was uncalled for. I hadn't fully read through this thread and it appears I am not the only one who had a rude response from her when they reached out. I didn't ask her for any advice, I didn't expect anything from her per se, I just thought she might give me a thank you for sharing your experience and praising of my book message (if she read my message, didn't even think it would get through as she has a big following, I was just very moved by her book and I wanted to tell her how much it meant to me), but I got a fuck off kind of message. It wasn't nice and she should know better when dealing with vulnerable women who are going through some pretty rotten shit.
I should have quoted it but someone said earlier on here, "what people perceive as rude" - it's not what people "perceive" as rude, she IS rude and it's absolute crap for people to dismiss that because they just love Elle oh so very much. She has chosen to write a book and put herself out there, no one forced her. I bought her book, wrote positive reviews on amazon, goodreads, and audible, and she was unkind to me after sharing my experience, thanking her for making me feel less alone, and praising her book. Then I realized she had blocked me from her stories but not her grid, because hey, I might be a customer again and she could promote her new book to people like me who had bought the first. I legit wished I could return her book after the response I got from her, I deleted all my positive reviews and unfollowed her. You guys think you know her because you see a tiny snip it of her good deeds and put her up on a pedestal of untouchability because she lost a child, and I feel for her on that, I really do, but that doesn't mean she has carte blanche to treat people unkindly.
I tried to edit this but I didn't realize there's a time limit. She simply could have not responded, like someone else said. The things is, presumably she wrote her book for altruistic reasons, right? She should understand that books can have a huge impact on people, especially books about something like this. People will want to get in touch and tell you how much your writing meant to them. It's not unreasonable to expect, if they are going to take the time to reply to you, that they would at least reply with a generic message that was kindhearted and gracious if they want boundaries - something like, 'I appreciate your message, however I'm just one person and I cannot reply to everyone individually, please know I appreciate all you have shared with me and your support of Teddy's Wish or Tommy's' or whatever charity it is her book and she supports - instead of a rude, I haven't got the time for this style message. Cool, thanks. I'll remember that next time I'm in the bookshop. And before someone says, "she doesn't have to support all of the people it's hard for her", I didn't brain dump on her, I didn't share anything triggering, I'm not an idiot, I've been through the same things as her, I know how to behave. It was just jarring and hurtful and really, really unexpected.
What is RVL please?Thank you.
I've never posted anything negative about anyone (well, aside from shitty politicians who don't want to feed hungry children) on my instagram, I've never questioned anyone on rule following, ad declaring, or anything of that nature (tbh, I don't really give a crap about all that). I am a pretty positive person as far as interactions go, I try to lift people up, not tear them down. Last year there was an instagram account that posted some old tweets RVK had done that were incredibly horrific (racism, classism, fat shaming). A friend of mine (who loves Tattle) alerted me to said instagram (I had prior been a big RVK fan and sent a number of friends over to follow her), which I followed. I was then mass blocked by a number of accounts. Feathering was on her instagram "break" at the time, I think. I wasn't a Tattle person prior to the whole mass blocking, I had only come on during the Mother of Daughters debacle to watch that sh*t storm unfold, but didn't have an account, was just creeping. I created my account after the mass blocking and my eyes were well and truly opened to how nasty all of these women are. They all preach kindness but they've done some pretty rotten things to people and they are big, big fans of lying, ALL of them. I realize Instagram is a snip it of a person's life, I get that, that is what my instagram is, but you are either a good person or you are not. You can "preach" kindness all you like, you can hang all the "Be Kind" signs you want all over your house, you can even pretend to be an "advocate of kindness" but if you aren't kind IRL, well you're just an asshole dressed up as something else. I get this is all bread and butter to these people and they put on a pretty good show if you don't know any better. Other people have been blocked for no reason at all, so I can't say what I experienced is the only reason for blocking, they seem to go on blocking binges every now and then, so who knows why you were blocked. It's been rather eye opening reading on here. Some things are pretty over the top, some people really fixate on different aspects of people's lives, and do a lot of guessing when it comes to who someone is or how they behave, but there are definitely snippets of truth, there are people who know different people IRL and can testify to the truth or fiction of different rumors, or have had really nasty experiences with some of these women. It very quickly will burst your bubble when it comes to what you think of a lot of the bigger accounts that so many of us follow/followed. I had thought, however foolishly, that Elle was one of the good ones, but hey ho, life is full of disappointment.
It baffles me how people are willing to spend £50 on acrylic knitwear. ACRYLIC!!!!The knitwear is gorgeous but £30/50 for a tiny cardigan or jumper- how the other half live!
Wow! I refuse to wear acrylic, gives me shivers, just touching it. I would certainly not make my child wear it and certainly would not pay that money for it too. I thought they are all into ‘organic’ stuff. Clearly not. Or maybe it is organic acrylicIt baffles me how people are willing to spend £50 on acrylic knitwear. ACRYLIC!!!!
I bet she’s beautiful xI just saw Olivia, she is gorgeous. (I’m not friends with Elle but a lot of my friends used to work with her)
She is, little blondie with blue eyes and quite long hair already!I bet she’s beautiful x
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?