Tom Wambsgans
VIP Member
Hey Besties! I saw the Wamb Signal shining in the sky. Enjoy the recap.
Read time = ~7 minutes
————-
Boy oh boy, it’s sure good to be back. Sorry guys, I’ve been sick as a dog. It was the weirdest thing. I got back from the park after riding Pirates of the Caribbean and all of a sudden I couldn’t taste my lunch. Then I got a really intense fever with some vomiting and body aches. Even started coughing a little. Must be a bug going around. But anyway, ya gurl is healed - so let’s get this show on the road.
It’s been a wild time in the Blabbaverse lately, and we’ll certainly touch on current events - but for my own entertainment, we’ll be picking things up with the trip to Yosemite a few weeks back - because, well, I have thoughts.
The pedantic duo uncharacteristically followed through with a claim they had been making for several weeks - they were going camping, kinda. With KT behind the wheel and Spence nursing a mighty, but routine hangover, they made their way down the highway, stopping only for a yogurt with extra toppings and a nice chocolate cream cold brew to wash it down. Oh wait, silly me, I almost forgot one other stop they had to make…to buy camping gear. Definitely the most sensible purchase (and ol’ Tom’s favorite) was the Stranger Things-themed flashlight. Now, I’m no Bear Grylls, but something tells me I wouldn't want to be out in the wilderness with nothing but a S’mores kit and a novelty flashlight to rely on in case of emergency. Fortunately, chances of tragedy striking were slim as their campsite had a built-in pizza restaurant. Really cool to see, really, as this was exactly how our brave ancestors survived the grueling winters along the Oregon Trail en route to a better life on the west coast. Although, that was a simpler time when ranch dressing wasn’t only reserved for the wealthy. Anywho, as they showed us their sleeping accommodations, we got to see that their tent had them sleeping in two separate beds like Fred & Ethel Mertz, complete with all of the loathing, but none of the charm.
Before we move on, I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on one of my favorite events in recent BLAB history - the great Yosemite Nap™. As most of us know, KT & Spence took a scenic bike ride to the historic Ahwahnee Hotel. In the vlog we see Spencer enjoying a nice cocktail alone at the bar, and I certainly ain’t gonna hate on him for that. Tommy enjoys a good cocktail every now and again. The aspect of this that requires our attention is that later in the video, KT casually mentions that she “took a nap” while at the hotel. Now, I don’t know about you, but this is WILDLY interesting and ones’ imagination can’t help but run wild when trying to reconcile and visualize this statement: They arrive at a hotel they aren’t guests of, and her first instinct is to find a location to render herself unconscious!? We can only assume this was in a public space such as the lobby or a woodsy lounge. Perhaps she cuddled up on one of those cozy bear rugs next to a roaring fire? The possibilities aren’t quite endless, but the mystery is all-consuming. I’ll go to my grave seeking the answer - right up there with “Why are we here?” and “What’s it all for?”
Once the gang was safe & sound back at their Orange County Home™, Spencer began getting praise for what a wonderful job he did editing the Yosemite vlog. Now, I’d be happy to give credit where it’s due - I will always have appreciation for a well-executed artistic endeavor. But let’s be real here…a toddler could point their camera in any direction in a place like Yosemite and come out looking like Steve Spielberg. Only difference is, the toddler would be shooting in 4k to ensure the beautiful scenery wasn’t blurry when they zoomed-in.
The content that followed has been drab & dull per usual, and we’ve gotten a whole lot more Spencer than I’m comfortable with - but the true brilliance of their channel lately has come in the form of unscripted and unhinged livestreams. And I for one, am totally here for it. That’s not to say we haven’t gotten ANY edited vloggy gems lately - quite the opposite. We got a super casual, relaxing video straight outta Malibu where we got to see them unplugging live and in near-real-time. The views on this baby aren’t quite what they’d hoped for, certainly not for an exclusive look behind-the-curtain of how the other half lives here in sunny California. But, what KT & Spence don’t realize, is that they just don’t possess the charisma to carry the average viewer through the mundanities of everyday life with them, whether it’s by the ocean or not. And “Malibu" just doesn’t carry the clout they think it does, certainly not for folks in other states who are unfamiliar with CA beach communities. But anyway, at least we got a fun moment where KT unnecessarily kinda-sorta explained and confirmed that Spencer’s family lives or mostly-lives in the Malibu apartment which clarifies why KT & Spence only get to use it on rare occasions, likely when said family is out-of-town.
Back to the those juicy livestreams I mentioned earlier - they have been popping OFF. And the best part is, the most channel-damaging moments have actually taken place on the PAID portion of the stream that is reserved for their most cherished and loyal Besties (and a few other Bestie-adjacent folks that just like to show their support by innocently-distributing the WHW links, simply to ensure KT & Spence receive all the support they can get.)
On the Malibu WHW (non-Bestie-edition), KT was exhibiting some unsettling behavior where she was feigning interest in Spencer’s artwork - even going so far as to ask him to do a showcase live on-the-air. This part gave me the heebie-jeebies. The minute she starts acting like a human-being with normal feelings and emotions, my brain just goes into fight or flight mode. Soon after this charade had run its course, we moved on to the Besties livestream, and they moved over to the couch. This was my favorite, because yet again, completely unprovoked, she just started over-sharing some ill-conceived yarn about her and Spencer’s romantic history and the timeline in which they originally got together. She yet again sloppily-attempted to steer the scent away from her being a dirty adulteress and him being a slimy home wrecker, but in doing so, kinda just poured another solid layer of cement over the true story that we already know & love. It was kinda fun, really. We even got a naughty curse-word out of KT and the immediate look in Spencer’s eyes was truly priceless. Oh and one more thing - I don’t know about you guys, but who else stopped using the word “hookup” back in middle school? Like, I know that’s an exaggeration, and as hormonal young adults we all DID this…but it’s this Wambsgans’ opinion that as a grown adult, “hookup” just paints a picture of adolescent and juvenile promiscuity. Something that obviously tracks with KT’s stunted neurological development, but also a word that REALLY doesn’t help her cause when she’s trying to perpetuate the lark that everything she and Spencer did was above-board. Much like Ross Gellar.
…Wait…do guys here that?! It sounds like drums thundering in the distance. If my limited knowledge of the cultural rituals of local indigenous peoples does not deceive me, I believe those are the ceremonial drums of the Ahwahnechee tribe. Legend has it, they only perform their drum ceremonies when they sense danger or impending doom. Which can only lead us to one conclusion, they have been following BLAB’s Covid-gate storyline unfold along with us.
It’s no mystery that KT called in sick last weekend to the first-ever Super Besties meet up. In one fell swoop, she single-handedly broke the hearts of her stanniest Stans that had literally been counting the minutes until this momentous occasion. And I think we’d all agree that this whole thing threw us for a loop. Calling in sick and cancelling the Besties Meetup is the exact thing that we all expected she would do, so, it’s no surprise that everyone assumed she was lying. But then came the social media radio silence. Boy, she sure knows how to get our speculation-engines revving. Is she sick? Is she not sick? Did her and Spencer break up? Did she have an adverse reaction to a Hailey Beiber smoothie? The possibilities were literally endless.
In a surprising turn of events, and as it turns out, the most fortunate outcome for KT and her reputation - she actually was sick! Now, I’m certainly not saying it’s actually fortunate she was sick - I don’t wish illness on her - but she had her FIRST, ACTUAL, NON-LIE excuse for doing something or behaving a certain way. Illness is something anyone will understand and you’ll generally get a pass. Especially in 2022. So she’s in the clear - this next WHW should be a breeze! Just give it to the fans straight, take the proper precautions, and life will go on!
Buuuuuuuuuuut no. In an asinine attempt to prove us haters wrong, she insisted they push forward with their Besties-only livestream despite still looking and sounding super-duper sick. And I hate to be “Mr. Covid”, but like, she most definitely had/has Covid right? I kid, I kid. It’s definitely Covid. I’d actually challenge you to find me a more clear-cut case of Covid documented on video - go ahead, I’ll wait. In yet another ill-conceived, stream-of-consciousness dump of unintelligible information, she confusingly describes all of her Covid-like symptoms all while trying her best not to mention the word “Covid.” She eventually skims over it, but also doesn’t admit to taking any tests that would have told her if she was positive or negative for the disease that has been ravaging the globe for the last 2.5 years. Instead, she claims to have “some kind of super bug” that is going around right now, with her niece being patient zero.
It’s been said, so I don’t need to repeat it here, but I will anyway…the fact that she likely has Covid, took no tests to confirm nor deny, but still let Spencer “Comorbidity” Emmons galavant around Disneyland is downright criminal. Especially when you take into account the fact that on the day she claimed the sickness overtook her, Spence took their only automobile and went to Disneyland with his little playmates all day & night. Good thing she didn’t succumb to the fever in his absence - boy would his face have been red(der) when he got home!
And here we are. It’s Friday. Pirates of the Caribbean is finally open once again. And much like the salmon of Capistrano, vloggers are instinctively flocking to the Disneyland Resort to try and get the scoop on, what is from my understanding, just a standard reopening following some annual routine maintenance. Like a child on Christmas morning, none of us here on Tattle could sleep last night wondering which path BLAB would take today. Would they go to the park, or would they not? Well, we got our answer, and so far I’m pleased with the outcome.
Of course I’m sad for the state of the world witnessing a grown man venture to a public place made for children, and seeing him endanger the health & safety of thousands - but HOW he chose to do it is right up there with the Yosemite Nap™ in my bucket of classic BLAB moments. Can you guess? Ok I’ll just tell you - it’s his clever disguise!
Dude, I just couldn’t help but smile when I saw that first blurry screen shot of him waiting at rope drop, hatless. And mind you, hatless for literally like, the 3rd time in all of BLAB history. So you KNOW his thought process was “Well hey, I’m Spencer from Best Life & Beyond. I’m kind of a big deal…people know me. And they know my typical uniform is a flat-brimmed hat. If they notice my very unique and obvious uniform, they’ll know I’m at the park and give me shit for that scathing ITM article that’s going around right now. So, if I simply leave the hat at home, I’ll fly under the radar and it will be like I was never there! But I’ll still earn my $48 from the PoTC vlog! Oh Spencer, you sly dog, you.”
And this my friends, is where I’ll leave you. Who knows what the future will hold. Bye-bye everybody!
Hey Besties! I saw the Wamb Signal shining in the sky. Enjoy the recap.
Read time = ~7 minutes
————-
Boy oh boy, it’s sure good to be back. Sorry guys, I’ve been sick as a dog. It was the weirdest thing. I got back from the park after riding Pirates of the Caribbean and all of a sudden I couldn’t taste my lunch. Then I got a really intense fever with some vomiting and body aches. Even started coughing a little. Must be a bug going around. But anyway, ya gurl is healed - so let’s get this show on the road.
It’s been a wild time in the Blabbaverse lately, and we’ll certainly touch on current events - but for my own entertainment, we’ll be picking things up with the trip to Yosemite a few weeks back - because, well, I have thoughts.
The pedantic duo uncharacteristically followed through with a claim they had been making for several weeks - they were going camping, kinda. With KT behind the wheel and Spence nursing a mighty, but routine hangover, they made their way down the highway, stopping only for a yogurt with extra toppings and a nice chocolate cream cold brew to wash it down. Oh wait, silly me, I almost forgot one other stop they had to make…to buy camping gear. Definitely the most sensible purchase (and ol’ Tom’s favorite) was the Stranger Things-themed flashlight. Now, I’m no Bear Grylls, but something tells me I wouldn't want to be out in the wilderness with nothing but a S’mores kit and a novelty flashlight to rely on in case of emergency. Fortunately, chances of tragedy striking were slim as their campsite had a built-in pizza restaurant. Really cool to see, really, as this was exactly how our brave ancestors survived the grueling winters along the Oregon Trail en route to a better life on the west coast. Although, that was a simpler time when ranch dressing wasn’t only reserved for the wealthy. Anywho, as they showed us their sleeping accommodations, we got to see that their tent had them sleeping in two separate beds like Fred & Ethel Mertz, complete with all of the loathing, but none of the charm.
Before we move on, I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on one of my favorite events in recent BLAB history - the great Yosemite Nap™. As most of us know, KT & Spence took a scenic bike ride to the historic Ahwahnee Hotel. In the vlog we see Spencer enjoying a nice cocktail alone at the bar, and I certainly ain’t gonna hate on him for that. Tommy enjoys a good cocktail every now and again. The aspect of this that requires our attention is that later in the video, KT casually mentions that she “took a nap” while at the hotel. Now, I don’t know about you, but this is WILDLY interesting and ones’ imagination can’t help but run wild when trying to reconcile and visualize this statement: They arrive at a hotel they aren’t guests of, and her first instinct is to find a location to render herself unconscious!? We can only assume this was in a public space such as the lobby or a woodsy lounge. Perhaps she cuddled up on one of those cozy bear rugs next to a roaring fire? The possibilities aren’t quite endless, but the mystery is all-consuming. I’ll go to my grave seeking the answer - right up there with “Why are we here?” and “What’s it all for?”
Once the gang was safe & sound back at their Orange County Home™, Spencer began getting praise for what a wonderful job he did editing the Yosemite vlog. Now, I’d be happy to give credit where it’s due - I will always have appreciation for a well-executed artistic endeavor. But let’s be real here…a toddler could point their camera in any direction in a place like Yosemite and come out looking like Steve Spielberg. Only difference is, the toddler would be shooting in 4k to ensure the beautiful scenery wasn’t blurry when they zoomed-in.
The content that followed has been drab & dull per usual, and we’ve gotten a whole lot more Spencer than I’m comfortable with - but the true brilliance of their channel lately has come in the form of unscripted and unhinged livestreams. And I for one, am totally here for it. That’s not to say we haven’t gotten ANY edited vloggy gems lately - quite the opposite. We got a super casual, relaxing video straight outta Malibu where we got to see them unplugging live and in near-real-time. The views on this baby aren’t quite what they’d hoped for, certainly not for an exclusive look behind-the-curtain of how the other half lives here in sunny California. But, what KT & Spence don’t realize, is that they just don’t possess the charisma to carry the average viewer through the mundanities of everyday life with them, whether it’s by the ocean or not. And “Malibu" just doesn’t carry the clout they think it does, certainly not for folks in other states who are unfamiliar with CA beach communities. But anyway, at least we got a fun moment where KT unnecessarily kinda-sorta explained and confirmed that Spencer’s family lives or mostly-lives in the Malibu apartment which clarifies why KT & Spence only get to use it on rare occasions, likely when said family is out-of-town.
Back to the those juicy livestreams I mentioned earlier - they have been popping OFF. And the best part is, the most channel-damaging moments have actually taken place on the PAID portion of the stream that is reserved for their most cherished and loyal Besties (and a few other Bestie-adjacent folks that just like to show their support by innocently-distributing the WHW links, simply to ensure KT & Spence receive all the support they can get.)
On the Malibu WHW (non-Bestie-edition), KT was exhibiting some unsettling behavior where she was feigning interest in Spencer’s artwork - even going so far as to ask him to do a showcase live on-the-air. This part gave me the heebie-jeebies. The minute she starts acting like a human-being with normal feelings and emotions, my brain just goes into fight or flight mode. Soon after this charade had run its course, we moved on to the Besties livestream, and they moved over to the couch. This was my favorite, because yet again, completely unprovoked, she just started over-sharing some ill-conceived yarn about her and Spencer’s romantic history and the timeline in which they originally got together. She yet again sloppily-attempted to steer the scent away from her being a dirty adulteress and him being a slimy home wrecker, but in doing so, kinda just poured another solid layer of cement over the true story that we already know & love. It was kinda fun, really. We even got a naughty curse-word out of KT and the immediate look in Spencer’s eyes was truly priceless. Oh and one more thing - I don’t know about you guys, but who else stopped using the word “hookup” back in middle school? Like, I know that’s an exaggeration, and as hormonal young adults we all DID this…but it’s this Wambsgans’ opinion that as a grown adult, “hookup” just paints a picture of adolescent and juvenile promiscuity. Something that obviously tracks with KT’s stunted neurological development, but also a word that REALLY doesn’t help her cause when she’s trying to perpetuate the lark that everything she and Spencer did was above-board. Much like Ross Gellar.
…Wait…do guys here that?! It sounds like drums thundering in the distance. If my limited knowledge of the cultural rituals of local indigenous peoples does not deceive me, I believe those are the ceremonial drums of the Ahwahnechee tribe. Legend has it, they only perform their drum ceremonies when they sense danger or impending doom. Which can only lead us to one conclusion, they have been following BLAB’s Covid-gate storyline unfold along with us.
It’s no mystery that KT called in sick last weekend to the first-ever Super Besties meet up. In one fell swoop, she single-handedly broke the hearts of her stanniest Stans that had literally been counting the minutes until this momentous occasion. And I think we’d all agree that this whole thing threw us for a loop. Calling in sick and cancelling the Besties Meetup is the exact thing that we all expected she would do, so, it’s no surprise that everyone assumed she was lying. But then came the social media radio silence. Boy, she sure knows how to get our speculation-engines revving. Is she sick? Is she not sick? Did her and Spencer break up? Did she have an adverse reaction to a Hailey Beiber smoothie? The possibilities were literally endless.
In a surprising turn of events, and as it turns out, the most fortunate outcome for KT and her reputation - she actually was sick! Now, I’m certainly not saying it’s actually fortunate she was sick - I don’t wish illness on her - but she had her FIRST, ACTUAL, NON-LIE excuse for doing something or behaving a certain way. Illness is something anyone will understand and you’ll generally get a pass. Especially in 2022. So she’s in the clear - this next WHW should be a breeze! Just give it to the fans straight, take the proper precautions, and life will go on!
Buuuuuuuuuuut no. In an asinine attempt to prove us haters wrong, she insisted they push forward with their Besties-only livestream despite still looking and sounding super-duper sick. And I hate to be “Mr. Covid”, but like, she most definitely had/has Covid right? I kid, I kid. It’s definitely Covid. I’d actually challenge you to find me a more clear-cut case of Covid documented on video - go ahead, I’ll wait. In yet another ill-conceived, stream-of-consciousness dump of unintelligible information, she confusingly describes all of her Covid-like symptoms all while trying her best not to mention the word “Covid.” She eventually skims over it, but also doesn’t admit to taking any tests that would have told her if she was positive or negative for the disease that has been ravaging the globe for the last 2.5 years. Instead, she claims to have “some kind of super bug” that is going around right now, with her niece being patient zero.
It’s been said, so I don’t need to repeat it here, but I will anyway…the fact that she likely has Covid, took no tests to confirm nor deny, but still let Spencer “Comorbidity” Emmons galavant around Disneyland is downright criminal. Especially when you take into account the fact that on the day she claimed the sickness overtook her, Spence took their only automobile and went to Disneyland with his little playmates all day & night. Good thing she didn’t succumb to the fever in his absence - boy would his face have been red(der) when he got home!
And here we are. It’s Friday. Pirates of the Caribbean is finally open once again. And much like the salmon of Capistrano, vloggers are instinctively flocking to the Disneyland Resort to try and get the scoop on, what is from my understanding, just a standard reopening following some annual routine maintenance. Like a child on Christmas morning, none of us here on Tattle could sleep last night wondering which path BLAB would take today. Would they go to the park, or would they not? Well, we got our answer, and so far I’m pleased with the outcome.
Of course I’m sad for the state of the world witnessing a grown man venture to a public place made for children, and seeing him endanger the health & safety of thousands - but HOW he chose to do it is right up there with the Yosemite Nap™ in my bucket of classic BLAB moments. Can you guess? Ok I’ll just tell you - it’s his clever disguise!
Dude, I just couldn’t help but smile when I saw that first blurry screen shot of him waiting at rope drop, hatless. And mind you, hatless for literally like, the 3rd time in all of BLAB history. So you KNOW his thought process was “Well hey, I’m Spencer from Best Life & Beyond. I’m kind of a big deal…people know me. And they know my typical uniform is a flat-brimmed hat. If they notice my very unique and obvious uniform, they’ll know I’m at the park and give me shit for that scathing ITM article that’s going around right now. So, if I simply leave the hat at home, I’ll fly under the radar and it will be like I was never there! But I’ll still earn my $48 from the PoTC vlog! Oh Spencer, you sly dog, you.”
And this my friends, is where I’ll leave you. Who knows what the future will hold. Bye-bye everybody!
Read time = ~7 minutes
————-
Boy oh boy, it’s sure good to be back. Sorry guys, I’ve been sick as a dog. It was the weirdest thing. I got back from the park after riding Pirates of the Caribbean and all of a sudden I couldn’t taste my lunch. Then I got a really intense fever with some vomiting and body aches. Even started coughing a little. Must be a bug going around. But anyway, ya gurl is healed - so let’s get this show on the road.
It’s been a wild time in the Blabbaverse lately, and we’ll certainly touch on current events - but for my own entertainment, we’ll be picking things up with the trip to Yosemite a few weeks back - because, well, I have thoughts.
The pedantic duo uncharacteristically followed through with a claim they had been making for several weeks - they were going camping, kinda. With KT behind the wheel and Spence nursing a mighty, but routine hangover, they made their way down the highway, stopping only for a yogurt with extra toppings and a nice chocolate cream cold brew to wash it down. Oh wait, silly me, I almost forgot one other stop they had to make…to buy camping gear. Definitely the most sensible purchase (and ol’ Tom’s favorite) was the Stranger Things-themed flashlight. Now, I’m no Bear Grylls, but something tells me I wouldn't want to be out in the wilderness with nothing but a S’mores kit and a novelty flashlight to rely on in case of emergency. Fortunately, chances of tragedy striking were slim as their campsite had a built-in pizza restaurant. Really cool to see, really, as this was exactly how our brave ancestors survived the grueling winters along the Oregon Trail en route to a better life on the west coast. Although, that was a simpler time when ranch dressing wasn’t only reserved for the wealthy. Anywho, as they showed us their sleeping accommodations, we got to see that their tent had them sleeping in two separate beds like Fred & Ethel Mertz, complete with all of the loathing, but none of the charm.
Before we move on, I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on one of my favorite events in recent BLAB history - the great Yosemite Nap™. As most of us know, KT & Spence took a scenic bike ride to the historic Ahwahnee Hotel. In the vlog we see Spencer enjoying a nice cocktail alone at the bar, and I certainly ain’t gonna hate on him for that. Tommy enjoys a good cocktail every now and again. The aspect of this that requires our attention is that later in the video, KT casually mentions that she “took a nap” while at the hotel. Now, I don’t know about you, but this is WILDLY interesting and ones’ imagination can’t help but run wild when trying to reconcile and visualize this statement: They arrive at a hotel they aren’t guests of, and her first instinct is to find a location to render herself unconscious!? We can only assume this was in a public space such as the lobby or a woodsy lounge. Perhaps she cuddled up on one of those cozy bear rugs next to a roaring fire? The possibilities aren’t quite endless, but the mystery is all-consuming. I’ll go to my grave seeking the answer - right up there with “Why are we here?” and “What’s it all for?”
Once the gang was safe & sound back at their Orange County Home™, Spencer began getting praise for what a wonderful job he did editing the Yosemite vlog. Now, I’d be happy to give credit where it’s due - I will always have appreciation for a well-executed artistic endeavor. But let’s be real here…a toddler could point their camera in any direction in a place like Yosemite and come out looking like Steve Spielberg. Only difference is, the toddler would be shooting in 4k to ensure the beautiful scenery wasn’t blurry when they zoomed-in.
The content that followed has been drab & dull per usual, and we’ve gotten a whole lot more Spencer than I’m comfortable with - but the true brilliance of their channel lately has come in the form of unscripted and unhinged livestreams. And I for one, am totally here for it. That’s not to say we haven’t gotten ANY edited vloggy gems lately - quite the opposite. We got a super casual, relaxing video straight outta Malibu where we got to see them unplugging live and in near-real-time. The views on this baby aren’t quite what they’d hoped for, certainly not for an exclusive look behind-the-curtain of how the other half lives here in sunny California. But, what KT & Spence don’t realize, is that they just don’t possess the charisma to carry the average viewer through the mundanities of everyday life with them, whether it’s by the ocean or not. And “Malibu" just doesn’t carry the clout they think it does, certainly not for folks in other states who are unfamiliar with CA beach communities. But anyway, at least we got a fun moment where KT unnecessarily kinda-sorta explained and confirmed that Spencer’s family lives or mostly-lives in the Malibu apartment which clarifies why KT & Spence only get to use it on rare occasions, likely when said family is out-of-town.
Back to the those juicy livestreams I mentioned earlier - they have been popping OFF. And the best part is, the most channel-damaging moments have actually taken place on the PAID portion of the stream that is reserved for their most cherished and loyal Besties (and a few other Bestie-adjacent folks that just like to show their support by innocently-distributing the WHW links, simply to ensure KT & Spence receive all the support they can get.)
On the Malibu WHW (non-Bestie-edition), KT was exhibiting some unsettling behavior where she was feigning interest in Spencer’s artwork - even going so far as to ask him to do a showcase live on-the-air. This part gave me the heebie-jeebies. The minute she starts acting like a human-being with normal feelings and emotions, my brain just goes into fight or flight mode. Soon after this charade had run its course, we moved on to the Besties livestream, and they moved over to the couch. This was my favorite, because yet again, completely unprovoked, she just started over-sharing some ill-conceived yarn about her and Spencer’s romantic history and the timeline in which they originally got together. She yet again sloppily-attempted to steer the scent away from her being a dirty adulteress and him being a slimy home wrecker, but in doing so, kinda just poured another solid layer of cement over the true story that we already know & love. It was kinda fun, really. We even got a naughty curse-word out of KT and the immediate look in Spencer’s eyes was truly priceless. Oh and one more thing - I don’t know about you guys, but who else stopped using the word “hookup” back in middle school? Like, I know that’s an exaggeration, and as hormonal young adults we all DID this…but it’s this Wambsgans’ opinion that as a grown adult, “hookup” just paints a picture of adolescent and juvenile promiscuity. Something that obviously tracks with KT’s stunted neurological development, but also a word that REALLY doesn’t help her cause when she’s trying to perpetuate the lark that everything she and Spencer did was above-board. Much like Ross Gellar.
…Wait…do guys here that?! It sounds like drums thundering in the distance. If my limited knowledge of the cultural rituals of local indigenous peoples does not deceive me, I believe those are the ceremonial drums of the Ahwahnechee tribe. Legend has it, they only perform their drum ceremonies when they sense danger or impending doom. Which can only lead us to one conclusion, they have been following BLAB’s Covid-gate storyline unfold along with us.
It’s no mystery that KT called in sick last weekend to the first-ever Super Besties meet up. In one fell swoop, she single-handedly broke the hearts of her stanniest Stans that had literally been counting the minutes until this momentous occasion. And I think we’d all agree that this whole thing threw us for a loop. Calling in sick and cancelling the Besties Meetup is the exact thing that we all expected she would do, so, it’s no surprise that everyone assumed she was lying. But then came the social media radio silence. Boy, she sure knows how to get our speculation-engines revving. Is she sick? Is she not sick? Did her and Spencer break up? Did she have an adverse reaction to a Hailey Beiber smoothie? The possibilities were literally endless.
In a surprising turn of events, and as it turns out, the most fortunate outcome for KT and her reputation - she actually was sick! Now, I’m certainly not saying it’s actually fortunate she was sick - I don’t wish illness on her - but she had her FIRST, ACTUAL, NON-LIE excuse for doing something or behaving a certain way. Illness is something anyone will understand and you’ll generally get a pass. Especially in 2022. So she’s in the clear - this next WHW should be a breeze! Just give it to the fans straight, take the proper precautions, and life will go on!
Buuuuuuuuuuut no. In an asinine attempt to prove us haters wrong, she insisted they push forward with their Besties-only livestream despite still looking and sounding super-duper sick. And I hate to be “Mr. Covid”, but like, she most definitely had/has Covid right? I kid, I kid. It’s definitely Covid. I’d actually challenge you to find me a more clear-cut case of Covid documented on video - go ahead, I’ll wait. In yet another ill-conceived, stream-of-consciousness dump of unintelligible information, she confusingly describes all of her Covid-like symptoms all while trying her best not to mention the word “Covid.” She eventually skims over it, but also doesn’t admit to taking any tests that would have told her if she was positive or negative for the disease that has been ravaging the globe for the last 2.5 years. Instead, she claims to have “some kind of super bug” that is going around right now, with her niece being patient zero.
It’s been said, so I don’t need to repeat it here, but I will anyway…the fact that she likely has Covid, took no tests to confirm nor deny, but still let Spencer “Comorbidity” Emmons galavant around Disneyland is downright criminal. Especially when you take into account the fact that on the day she claimed the sickness overtook her, Spence took their only automobile and went to Disneyland with his little playmates all day & night. Good thing she didn’t succumb to the fever in his absence - boy would his face have been red(der) when he got home!
And here we are. It’s Friday. Pirates of the Caribbean is finally open once again. And much like the salmon of Capistrano, vloggers are instinctively flocking to the Disneyland Resort to try and get the scoop on, what is from my understanding, just a standard reopening following some annual routine maintenance. Like a child on Christmas morning, none of us here on Tattle could sleep last night wondering which path BLAB would take today. Would they go to the park, or would they not? Well, we got our answer, and so far I’m pleased with the outcome.
Of course I’m sad for the state of the world witnessing a grown man venture to a public place made for children, and seeing him endanger the health & safety of thousands - but HOW he chose to do it is right up there with the Yosemite Nap™ in my bucket of classic BLAB moments. Can you guess? Ok I’ll just tell you - it’s his clever disguise!
Dude, I just couldn’t help but smile when I saw that first blurry screen shot of him waiting at rope drop, hatless. And mind you, hatless for literally like, the 3rd time in all of BLAB history. So you KNOW his thought process was “Well hey, I’m Spencer from Best Life & Beyond. I’m kind of a big deal…people know me. And they know my typical uniform is a flat-brimmed hat. If they notice my very unique and obvious uniform, they’ll know I’m at the park and give me shit for that scathing ITM article that’s going around right now. So, if I simply leave the hat at home, I’ll fly under the radar and it will be like I was never there! But I’ll still earn my $48 from the PoTC vlog! Oh Spencer, you sly dog, you.”
And this my friends, is where I’ll leave you. Who knows what the future will hold. Bye-bye everybody!
Hey Besties! I saw the Wamb Signal shining in the sky. Enjoy the recap.
Read time = ~7 minutes
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Boy oh boy, it’s sure good to be back. Sorry guys, I’ve been sick as a dog. It was the weirdest thing. I got back from the park after riding Pirates of the Caribbean and all of a sudden I couldn’t taste my lunch. Then I got a really intense fever with some vomiting and body aches. Even started coughing a little. Must be a bug going around. But anyway, ya gurl is healed - so let’s get this show on the road.
It’s been a wild time in the Blabbaverse lately, and we’ll certainly touch on current events - but for my own entertainment, we’ll be picking things up with the trip to Yosemite a few weeks back - because, well, I have thoughts.
The pedantic duo uncharacteristically followed through with a claim they had been making for several weeks - they were going camping, kinda. With KT behind the wheel and Spence nursing a mighty, but routine hangover, they made their way down the highway, stopping only for a yogurt with extra toppings and a nice chocolate cream cold brew to wash it down. Oh wait, silly me, I almost forgot one other stop they had to make…to buy camping gear. Definitely the most sensible purchase (and ol’ Tom’s favorite) was the Stranger Things-themed flashlight. Now, I’m no Bear Grylls, but something tells me I wouldn't want to be out in the wilderness with nothing but a S’mores kit and a novelty flashlight to rely on in case of emergency. Fortunately, chances of tragedy striking were slim as their campsite had a built-in pizza restaurant. Really cool to see, really, as this was exactly how our brave ancestors survived the grueling winters along the Oregon Trail en route to a better life on the west coast. Although, that was a simpler time when ranch dressing wasn’t only reserved for the wealthy. Anywho, as they showed us their sleeping accommodations, we got to see that their tent had them sleeping in two separate beds like Fred & Ethel Mertz, complete with all of the loathing, but none of the charm.
Before we move on, I would be remiss if I didn’t touch on one of my favorite events in recent BLAB history - the great Yosemite Nap™. As most of us know, KT & Spence took a scenic bike ride to the historic Ahwahnee Hotel. In the vlog we see Spencer enjoying a nice cocktail alone at the bar, and I certainly ain’t gonna hate on him for that. Tommy enjoys a good cocktail every now and again. The aspect of this that requires our attention is that later in the video, KT casually mentions that she “took a nap” while at the hotel. Now, I don’t know about you, but this is WILDLY interesting and ones’ imagination can’t help but run wild when trying to reconcile and visualize this statement: They arrive at a hotel they aren’t guests of, and her first instinct is to find a location to render herself unconscious!? We can only assume this was in a public space such as the lobby or a woodsy lounge. Perhaps she cuddled up on one of those cozy bear rugs next to a roaring fire? The possibilities aren’t quite endless, but the mystery is all-consuming. I’ll go to my grave seeking the answer - right up there with “Why are we here?” and “What’s it all for?”
Once the gang was safe & sound back at their Orange County Home™, Spencer began getting praise for what a wonderful job he did editing the Yosemite vlog. Now, I’d be happy to give credit where it’s due - I will always have appreciation for a well-executed artistic endeavor. But let’s be real here…a toddler could point their camera in any direction in a place like Yosemite and come out looking like Steve Spielberg. Only difference is, the toddler would be shooting in 4k to ensure the beautiful scenery wasn’t blurry when they zoomed-in.
The content that followed has been drab & dull per usual, and we’ve gotten a whole lot more Spencer than I’m comfortable with - but the true brilliance of their channel lately has come in the form of unscripted and unhinged livestreams. And I for one, am totally here for it. That’s not to say we haven’t gotten ANY edited vloggy gems lately - quite the opposite. We got a super casual, relaxing video straight outta Malibu where we got to see them unplugging live and in near-real-time. The views on this baby aren’t quite what they’d hoped for, certainly not for an exclusive look behind-the-curtain of how the other half lives here in sunny California. But, what KT & Spence don’t realize, is that they just don’t possess the charisma to carry the average viewer through the mundanities of everyday life with them, whether it’s by the ocean or not. And “Malibu" just doesn’t carry the clout they think it does, certainly not for folks in other states who are unfamiliar with CA beach communities. But anyway, at least we got a fun moment where KT unnecessarily kinda-sorta explained and confirmed that Spencer’s family lives or mostly-lives in the Malibu apartment which clarifies why KT & Spence only get to use it on rare occasions, likely when said family is out-of-town.
Back to the those juicy livestreams I mentioned earlier - they have been popping OFF. And the best part is, the most channel-damaging moments have actually taken place on the PAID portion of the stream that is reserved for their most cherished and loyal Besties (and a few other Bestie-adjacent folks that just like to show their support by innocently-distributing the WHW links, simply to ensure KT & Spence receive all the support they can get.)
On the Malibu WHW (non-Bestie-edition), KT was exhibiting some unsettling behavior where she was feigning interest in Spencer’s artwork - even going so far as to ask him to do a showcase live on-the-air. This part gave me the heebie-jeebies. The minute she starts acting like a human-being with normal feelings and emotions, my brain just goes into fight or flight mode. Soon after this charade had run its course, we moved on to the Besties livestream, and they moved over to the couch. This was my favorite, because yet again, completely unprovoked, she just started over-sharing some ill-conceived yarn about her and Spencer’s romantic history and the timeline in which they originally got together. She yet again sloppily-attempted to steer the scent away from her being a dirty adulteress and him being a slimy home wrecker, but in doing so, kinda just poured another solid layer of cement over the true story that we already know & love. It was kinda fun, really. We even got a naughty curse-word out of KT and the immediate look in Spencer’s eyes was truly priceless. Oh and one more thing - I don’t know about you guys, but who else stopped using the word “hookup” back in middle school? Like, I know that’s an exaggeration, and as hormonal young adults we all DID this…but it’s this Wambsgans’ opinion that as a grown adult, “hookup” just paints a picture of adolescent and juvenile promiscuity. Something that obviously tracks with KT’s stunted neurological development, but also a word that REALLY doesn’t help her cause when she’s trying to perpetuate the lark that everything she and Spencer did was above-board. Much like Ross Gellar.
…Wait…do guys here that?! It sounds like drums thundering in the distance. If my limited knowledge of the cultural rituals of local indigenous peoples does not deceive me, I believe those are the ceremonial drums of the Ahwahnechee tribe. Legend has it, they only perform their drum ceremonies when they sense danger or impending doom. Which can only lead us to one conclusion, they have been following BLAB’s Covid-gate storyline unfold along with us.
It’s no mystery that KT called in sick last weekend to the first-ever Super Besties meet up. In one fell swoop, she single-handedly broke the hearts of her stanniest Stans that had literally been counting the minutes until this momentous occasion. And I think we’d all agree that this whole thing threw us for a loop. Calling in sick and cancelling the Besties Meetup is the exact thing that we all expected she would do, so, it’s no surprise that everyone assumed she was lying. But then came the social media radio silence. Boy, she sure knows how to get our speculation-engines revving. Is she sick? Is she not sick? Did her and Spencer break up? Did she have an adverse reaction to a Hailey Beiber smoothie? The possibilities were literally endless.
In a surprising turn of events, and as it turns out, the most fortunate outcome for KT and her reputation - she actually was sick! Now, I’m certainly not saying it’s actually fortunate she was sick - I don’t wish illness on her - but she had her FIRST, ACTUAL, NON-LIE excuse for doing something or behaving a certain way. Illness is something anyone will understand and you’ll generally get a pass. Especially in 2022. So she’s in the clear - this next WHW should be a breeze! Just give it to the fans straight, take the proper precautions, and life will go on!
Buuuuuuuuuuut no. In an asinine attempt to prove us haters wrong, she insisted they push forward with their Besties-only livestream despite still looking and sounding super-duper sick. And I hate to be “Mr. Covid”, but like, she most definitely had/has Covid right? I kid, I kid. It’s definitely Covid. I’d actually challenge you to find me a more clear-cut case of Covid documented on video - go ahead, I’ll wait. In yet another ill-conceived, stream-of-consciousness dump of unintelligible information, she confusingly describes all of her Covid-like symptoms all while trying her best not to mention the word “Covid.” She eventually skims over it, but also doesn’t admit to taking any tests that would have told her if she was positive or negative for the disease that has been ravaging the globe for the last 2.5 years. Instead, she claims to have “some kind of super bug” that is going around right now, with her niece being patient zero.
It’s been said, so I don’t need to repeat it here, but I will anyway…the fact that she likely has Covid, took no tests to confirm nor deny, but still let Spencer “Comorbidity” Emmons galavant around Disneyland is downright criminal. Especially when you take into account the fact that on the day she claimed the sickness overtook her, Spence took their only automobile and went to Disneyland with his little playmates all day & night. Good thing she didn’t succumb to the fever in his absence - boy would his face have been red(der) when he got home!
And here we are. It’s Friday. Pirates of the Caribbean is finally open once again. And much like the salmon of Capistrano, vloggers are instinctively flocking to the Disneyland Resort to try and get the scoop on, what is from my understanding, just a standard reopening following some annual routine maintenance. Like a child on Christmas morning, none of us here on Tattle could sleep last night wondering which path BLAB would take today. Would they go to the park, or would they not? Well, we got our answer, and so far I’m pleased with the outcome.
Of course I’m sad for the state of the world witnessing a grown man venture to a public place made for children, and seeing him endanger the health & safety of thousands - but HOW he chose to do it is right up there with the Yosemite Nap™ in my bucket of classic BLAB moments. Can you guess? Ok I’ll just tell you - it’s his clever disguise!
Dude, I just couldn’t help but smile when I saw that first blurry screen shot of him waiting at rope drop, hatless. And mind you, hatless for literally like, the 3rd time in all of BLAB history. So you KNOW his thought process was “Well hey, I’m Spencer from Best Life & Beyond. I’m kind of a big deal…people know me. And they know my typical uniform is a flat-brimmed hat. If they notice my very unique and obvious uniform, they’ll know I’m at the park and give me shit for that scathing ITM article that’s going around right now. So, if I simply leave the hat at home, I’ll fly under the radar and it will be like I was never there! But I’ll still earn my $48 from the PoTC vlog! Oh Spencer, you sly dog, you.”
And this my friends, is where I’ll leave you. Who knows what the future will hold. Bye-bye everybody!
Kitra
. I’m Tom Wambsgans. I like to make people laugh. My source content is pulled directly from the material that Best Life & Beyond publishes on the internet. 
