Annoying things your work colleagues do all the time? #4

[Rodneytrotter]

I fully concur with this. My place is 3 days a week mandated... most people do that or more. I'm handing in my notice soon so it's kind of moot, but I feel absolutely run ragged when trying to do the 3 days as I find my colleagues quite exhausting to be around. It's a high-anxiety atmosphere (all self manufactured, no reason for it) and that's bad enough. But there isn't even room for everyone to sit together in the office, so it means going into the office is largely for presenteeism.


I'm sorry that all sounds exasperating.

I don't think it's good enough for the head to say she's aware and that nobody wants to work with her. You're now stuck with her and it's clearly having an impact on your enjoyment of your job and the children learning. Not to mention an impact on your health.

Could you speak to the head again? It sounds as though you've been far more tolerant and accepting/accommodating that the other staff. It wouldn't be unreasonable to raise the concerns you have mentioned here even if you don't feel able to talk about your own health issues, though it's good that you are taking those seriously (and I'm so sorry to hear -do you feel able to access the support you need?)

Thanks I will speak to the head again. I feel like I'm almost gaslighting myself to believe I'm being impatient and intolerant. I'm having counselling at the moment but ive told my counsellor that I'm not talking about food at the moment as I can panic that they'll make me eat more.

 

[Lola Ruby]

In my experience bosses love it as it sounds modern and flexible (sorry, agile) but it doesn’t effect them as they have their own office.

Exactly this! We’re moving offices soon and all of us peasants will be hotdesking (dreading it, plus we don’t even have enough desks for the number of people in our team) but of course all the managers get their own office. Now that I’m thinking about it, why is this OK and generally accepted by everyone?

 

[MagpieTree]

"hi emsie" on teams chat. I read it wait for more conversation .... Nothing happens. 10 minutes later I type "hi annoying person" at which point they launch into their chat. Drives me mad. Just put your pleasantries and request all in the one paragraph!

I ignore them until they actually tell me what they want, I’m not paid enough to indulge in false pleasantries

 

[emmer_moans]

When they do this and leave then X starts the meeting again, then leaves, and so on Even worse when the meeting has been cancelled.

I never join early, doing small talk with the one other person who joins early is awkward. I join on time to avoid that.

 

[ChastityDingle]

I think with those who brag constantly, it actually comes from a place of deep insecurity. If someone is secure in themselves they have no need to keep telling everyone how wonderful they are and how marvellous their life is. Also the fact that she is so insensitive to others, well ugh, I would prefer any day to have a bit of sensitivity than her boastful ways. Who knows, maybe it's all a front - the four bedroomed house talk etc.

All I can suggest is nod vaguely and smile, remember that her opinions and bragging count for nothing to you, and treat them accordingly - like an annoying fly that keeps buzzing somewhere near you but can't harm you . Thinking of her like that might help. When I have had colleagues that I couldn't stand for various reasons, I always reminded myself that they and their opinions counted for nothing to me.

Definitely do not say a word about your own plans. She would start trying to turn it into a competition.
And lastly best of luck, I hope that things go well for you.

 

[emerald]

People who trot out the same "banter" every day. Two separate people ask me every single cunting day "is it home time yet/can I go home emerald" omg please say something else. Anything.

 

[Norfolking Good]

We have two managers in our team at the same level who are best friends and regularly go on holiday together and I know for a fact anything they’re told is spread like a rumour in a playground because I’ve told one a personal issue just as an FYI and it’s gone around our department like wildfire and was even joked about in a group email under the guise of an anonymous comment. They’re both awful and in my own supervisions have been told highly confidential information about other people in the teams health and personal life. They seem to think it’s fine to gossip but I now tell them nothing personal due to this and they hate it but I won’t be a subject of jokes or rumour.

 

[WeHadFunRight]

Constantly ask why I am not in the office. I had a nervous breakdown a few months ago and as a result have done hybrid ever since until I am a bit more stable. I obviously am not going to announce that on the work group chat but it's always so awkward when they ask cause I don't know how to reply

I had someone teasing me about not being in the office and eventually I just told them that my working arrangements were between me and my manager and as long as he’s happy with my performance I’ll continue to do what I’m doing. They seemed to think it was harmless “Bantz” but I asked them to stop because I found it very annoying.

theres definitely a clear divide that’s formed between some people who go into the office a lot and people who prefer to work hybrid or home majority. I fully get the benefits of going into the office sometimes, but also I’m more than aware of my productivity in both environments.

 

[Catnmouse]

I used to work 4 days a week and my boss used to put important project meetings in on the day I was off. Every time I'd reply and say I'm not in and she'd say I could call in if I had updates and it was the only time.

Which I didn't because f that, I took a 20% pay reduction to work 20% less time.

Then she gave me feedback that it had been mentioned I wasnt contributing to the projects.

Of which I gave the feedback to HR that she was discriminating against me for being part time. Which fixed the issue lol

So I never let anyone book meetings in that don't allow a break or respect your hours.

God that grates. What a bloody cheek of her to go to HR.

I almost always refuse meetings between 12-2pm as I get very hangry!

 

[mee43]

I’m always slightly wary of someone I know reading here and working out who I am, so I’m being careful about what I say here.
But my team leader is honestly the most pedantic, control freakish, absolutely inept manager of time and process that I have ever, ever come across
As a result of this, I achieved next to nothing yesterday through being sent on useless, fools errands whilst piles of work were growing ever higher.
This then led to a mad panic later in the day about how it was all going to get done.
I’ve tried to gently point out that we’re not working effectively but they closed me down.
I’ll be doing exactly what I’m asked to do from now on; no extra hours, and forgetting about the place completely once I’m home.
I’m not getting paid anywhere near enough for crappy days like yesterday

 

[Ensay]

My out of office is on. I’ve told everyone I’m off til Wednesday. Yet people sent me emails on Friday (when I was also off) with stuff to do Monday. Now, in my company you get a preview of the out of office so you can see when someone if off if you bother to look. And all our calendars are public, so you can go get fucked lads.

That winds me up, too. But yeah ignore it. I just pretend I haven't looked at any emails after I put my out of office on. If they kick off, I just say that my out of office message clearly said when I was off, when I'd be back and who to contact in my absence.

My rant -- and it's one I've covered before, but needs saying again -- pointless meetings. It's always the same few people who take it to the extreme. There's one at the moment and it's clear he has only got one project on, so to save him twiddling his thumbs, he keeps putting in meetings. Some are literally meetings about future meetings. I'm honestly not joking.

He always makes meetings an hour long, even if that's not needed, and he circulates detailed agendas in advance (again a sign he's got too much time on his hands). At the end of each section, he says "has anyone got anything else to raise before we move on?" careful to add the bit in bold as if to say: "we're not finishing yet". The worst thing is that there are a couple of people on the project who are equally as light on time, so they're also eager to arrange millions of meetings.

 

[wishiniwasskinny]

That could be me...except I haven't been there for a long time, just a few years.

I'd love to be able to sit down for more than 15 seconds without about 10 new things cropping up that need urgent attention. And I prefer speaking to people to sending emails that can add to overwhelm and take longer to type, send then somebody has to answer, compared to a couple of minutes' conversation.

No shade at you but this is my beef. People who insist on speaking on the phone or in person when an email would do.

 

[petitspois]

Nah he’s a good manager, I don’t think he’s even noticed that he’s getting the credit as he missed the presentation and could have easily missed the shout out at the bottom of a weekly email. This is why I’m not sure if it’s worth bringing it up or letting it go

Bring it up.

 

[ot55]

I’ve joined a company where one of the women is best friends with the manager. They worked together at a previous company and they’re so thick in with each other it’s painful.

This woman is really nasty and rude to everyone else on the team but my manager turns a blind eye. She has such a huge ego and acts like she’s second in command. It doesn’t help that my manager fuels her ego and says things like ‘oh I don’t know what I’d do without you’. This girl isn’t even that good at her job, but she just sucks up all the time.

This woman also loves to brag that she goes to my manager’s house once a week for dinner. Like no one cares.

My manager tells her confidential information. She also treats her with a lot of favouritism (example, she gets given all the best jobs).

I’m looking to leave.

 

[pinkypurr]

i had a very difficult conversation with an old boss a few years ago. I wanted to take a day carers leave (my contract says im entitled to two weeks a year) to take my sister for chemo. My sister had a lot of chemo sessions and none of us had enough leave to cover all so we agreed a family rota. My boss said no because i wasn't the next of kin (my sister was married). Ironically my boss mother had died of the same cancer but she had zero empathy. I really can see why people say fuck work and just go off sick. I got it in the end. By pointing out i would just go to HR or her senior.

 

[Catnmouse]

Today is my first back since before Christmas - I had a stack of leave owing and January is usually a quiet time, so it was mutually agreeable that I would stay off until now.

Last week, I was asked if I could come because someone walked out and they were in a bit of a jam. I said I couldn't as I had plans (which I did, besides why are they throwing the problem to me when there are other people in the office quite capable of picking up the slack? I will add that I've said "yes" far too many times over the years to this place, including going in on the weekend to check someone has set the alarm properly after they've texted me doubting if they have [I live closest work out of everyone]).

I woke up today feeling nauseous but put it down to first day nerves; turns out I had a lot to be nervous about! Immediately after arriving into the office - I'd only just put my bag away in my cupboard - the GM came over and asked if he could have a word. As I walked through the office and smiled and greeted everyone, I just got frowns and mumbles in return. Very unusual considering our office is usually really friendly and if someone has been away for a while everyone usually gathers around wanting to know how their break was, etc. Once in the GM's office, I was hauled over the coals for letting the team down and losing a major account! Excuse me - but how is YOUR problem suddenly my fault?!

The person who walked out was under a huge amount of pressure and was meant to prepare a presentation for a client but they forgot about it until two days out from when it was meant to be delivered. Apparently they just freaked out and realised they couldn't deliver so walked out. If I had known the extent of the situation I may (or may not) have returned to work earlier. I threw it back to the GM and asked why one of the other team members couldn't do it ... his response was ridiculous - he said he wanted to ease the others into what will be a heavy year ahead. Super-ridiculous considering one of my work friends said things have been really quiet with all her clients so she's been taking extended lunch breaks.

Ugh. This, combined with the "suggestion" that we adopt a four-day working week but our base salaries get reduced to reflect that, just made me question what I'm even doing here. So, I gave my notice and will look for something else! I will happily go and work at one of my co-owned coffee carts for a few months if there's a need. I am going to eventually go and work with some other colleagues who set up in competition, but they're still in the process of getting things set up. This is all going to pan out well though, as I do have a six-month restraint of trade.

My boss started getting all desperate and saying he didn't want me to leave and although it was a major client and I'd made a serious mistake in judgement (!!!) it wasn't the end of the world, and he would be prepared to let me off with a warning which shouldn't impact too much in the scheme of things. Stuff him! How dare he try to make me the scapegoat!

I have given my two weeks' notice and said I'll be working it from home. If he doesn't like that, stuff him!

Good grief. I'm stunned. Gaslighting.

I would say I can't believe it but I honestly think if given the chance my place would pull something like this. Capitalism!!

When did we become such workaholics? I really despair of the way things are now. It feels like things have got worse not better since Covid and the encroachment of work into the home.

Have you heard anything more from them @Black.bird? You should feel no guilt whatsoever

 

[Popcornshovel]

One Monday my manager made a big thing about him being the only one in the office that day (we work hybrid so 60/40 office and work from home).

For context, alot of people have left for new jobs lately and also the next day we had mandatory training. So he was the only one in that Monday because all of us were coming in on Tuesday.

Anyway, he hauled us over the coals for 'leaving the office empty' (but the next day the office would be full due to the training!).

We wondered why he'd gone so OTT about it. It turned out that Monday was his birthday and he'd brought in cakes for us all. Nice of him to bring in cakes (which we ate the following day when we were all in), but definitely gave 'poor little lamb' vibes over him being annoyed he was in the office alone with no one wishing him happy birthday!

 

[Mamacita]

We do, but the company had temporarily amended the policy due to COVID (for 2020/2021). Either way, if my manager gives me a piece of information, unless it seems completely unreasonable, I don’t always second-guess everything they say to double check with the employee handbook. I had asked someone else and they too thought it was 10 days.

The day is gone now, so I’m annoyed, but I’ll get over it.

I would always go and read the policy first rather than ask managers, I've been given incorrect information in the past so always best to go with what's written down for everyone to see!

 

[DA Stella]

The manager (not mine, thankfully) who sends emails and insists they be responded to or actioned by EOD today but ignores MY emails for six weeks or more.
I got back at her by assigning tasks to her. If she can't be bothered to answer my emails asking who to assign the tasks to I'll just assign them all to her!

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Then, of course, there are the real life meetings.

If it's real life, turn up. Five minutes before the start, not 45 before when I'm hiding out back having a coffee and a vape after printing shit all fucking day, then sorting tables and cleaning food off them because the staff are bloody animals and still expect to be entertained, made tea and generally welcomed. If you aren't scrubbing Nigel's lunchtime soup off the table with a paper towel and hefting 20 chairs around, kindly bugger off and leave me the fuck alone sit in your car. Don't ghost the committee. Don't say yes and then evaporate. AND NEVER PUBLICLY MESSAGE 3 MINUTES AFTER THE MEETING STARTS TO SAY 'YOU HAVEN'T SENT ME THE LINK'.


If there are more than five items on the agenda after the housekeeping stuff, you are on a time limit. Ten minutes is your absolute maximum - imagine that the Governance Bod is mentally working out ways to quietly eviscerate you without leaving forensic evidence, particularly if you then take the opportunity to distribute a 9 page, poorly formatted, not stapled and riddled with typos 'report', most likely colour coded but printed in black and white with the page flip making every other one upside down with any staples you did manage to insert for the last two pages in the bottom right.

And other than in the most extreme circumstances and we're miraculously running under time by at least 37 minutes, Any Other Business is a purely rhetorical device. Do not interpret it as anything other than shorthand for 'We done, then? Great, see you next month'.

AND PUT YOUR DIRTY MUGS IN THE DISHWASHER AS YOU LEAVE.