Alfie Deyes #14 future self coffee

[StephenTJackson]

This has to be top 3 most pretentious things he’s done. By “We” he means Zoe, his sister and the boyfriend

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A cocktail van for all of four people. Jesus Christ! How the 1% live, what cost of living crisis.

Surprised he didn't take it up as his latest hobby to do cocktail making

 

[Yel]

I don't think Alfie has any concept of days or waiting to be paid.

Remember all those times he spoke about how much he loves Monday's and doesn't understand why everyone else doesn't. Then proceeds to show how his Monday was spent in bed until 10 then mooching around the house.

 

[jvalentine2189]

£65 for a hoody, £50 joggers and £10 for the socks! ffs we are in a economy crisis you ignorant tory.

This is a very unfair comment. I'll have you know that Algae spent two entire years embroidering on a simple Futures Elf logo on a Primark hoodie! He has to make back costs somehow!

 

[Idkk]

This is a really random gripe and I’m sorry for being so petty and dumb but it bugs the absolute SHIT out of me how he calls everything “incredibly successful”. Just had an incredibly successful meeting. That was an incredibly successful shopping trip. Just took an incredibly successful dump. Does he know what successful means?? Forever sounding like a kid playing the grown up.

 

[StephenTJackson]

Does anybody else get the vibe that Alfie is either gay or bisexual? Is he gonna pull a Schofield in a couple decades? Maybe right after finally caving and marrying Zoe.

I hope not. Us gays don't want him.

I just don't get sexual vibes at all from him. He just comes across very narrow minded when it comes to sex. He will only like very quick boring basic sex. No kinks, and is very judgy and finds fetishes weird.

 

[GossWhore]

UK v Alfie today for his birthday breakfast

 

[coconochanel]

The book he should be reading is 'how to leave your girlfriend of 10 years you don't want to marry'

 

[Twinkletoes974]

Has he seriously got a book called “why you get more done when you work less”???!

i mean, how much more less can he work?

Oh, and then Zoe saying she doesn’t work with email! No, you just don’t work love.
This vlog is so entertaining in so many ways.

 

[Ugholhere]

This has to be top 3 most pretentious things he’s done. By “We” he means Zoe, his sister and the boyfriend

 

[jvalentine2189]

He does realise that sitting in a sauna wont get you a six pack?

"Yoh, I lost 2 entire kilos from that sauna, but then after I drank some water I gained it back? *Rubs chin vigorously*"

 

[coconochanel]

If you are going to spend that much on tracksuit wouldn't you just buy a Nike one rather then one from some has been youtuber?

 

[kyrag2803]

Just Imagine him trying to take this… the Ick

 

[coconochanel]

in his new vid he says “I’m all about the slowing down, chilling out life” I’m not being funny, but what is it in his life that is so stressful? Obviously we don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, but I’m assuming he’s talking work wise.

He's only 'slowing down' because he's got no brand deals coming in and Zoe needs him to look after Ottie 24/7

 

[electricmallows]

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i love his body

Me opening this thread thinking I’m gonna see something funny and then being jump scared

 

[StephenTJackson]

Currently it took you years to finish a book under 400 pages Alfie… but yeah you’re ~currently~ reading this… will he start a book club too? ‘cause he’s such a bookworm
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Why is every book he reads (all 3 of them) the biggest self-help wank fest? And why have none of them helped him be less of a lazy twat.

Can't he just read a novel once?

 

[coconochanel]

*ALERT ALERT* Alfie is getting his body in the best shape of his life for his birthday in September *like the last 200 times he's tried!

 

[jvalentine2189]

I love that Algae had to post a story a day after his reel to let people know it was still there and they should like it. Must really sting to fade into such irrelevancy. I wonder if he wanks to his 2013 meetup videos.

 

[conrea37]

and did you know that he's not a tory

Any excuse to crack this out

 

[jackolantern]

came to say exactly this. It’s actually like he’s trolling Zoe now, booking a trip to Paris right around the time of their 10th anniversary, make everyone think a proposal might be on the cards…. And it turns out he’s taking his mum

I honestly think he's using quite significant emotional manipulation against Zoe at this point and it's really quite nasty. He's been dangling this over her head their entire relationship and now around there 10 year anniversary he decides to take his fucking mother to Paris? He's an absolute fucking dickhead. If this isn't a sign Zoe I don't know what else you need.

 

[jvalentine2189]

Was watching an old Joe vlog and this popped up in it. I think this is the funniest picture I've ever seen of Alfie.