Alcoholism

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Have you ever spoken to him about it? If I were you I would explain that you are worried and feel the same way about him drinking as he does about his parents. Not to be stereotypical but I think men have to have emotional issues spelled out to them very very obviously, and if he does have a problem alcoholics are very selfish and won’t notice the feelings of others around them. It’s easier said than done speaking about this subject though, and if he is in denial about it he might be quite defensive.

If it is really worrying you quite badly I think you should establish some clear boundaries of what you feel comfortable with. You clearly aren’t comfortable with his drinking and the issue needs to be nipped in the bud before it becomes unstoppable.

I’m not sure if this advice is any good, I’m not a professional, just going from my gut feelings. My mum always says if she could go back in time and speak to herself at the beginning of her relationship with my dad she would be screaming at younger self. You don’t ever want to end up regretting things like that.

Best wishes to you both x
Yeah, he knows exactly how I feel. We've been having this conversation for the past year.

There is definitely an element of denial and he gets defensive when I try and bring it up. I've learned not to try speaking to him about it when he is drinking because it doesn't accomplish anything. I go to bed and let him get on with it and let him deal with his hangover. He uses alcohol as a stress relief but doesn't seem to get that it's a depressant. He is definitely going through something but either doesn't know what is making him stressed or doesn't want to think/talk about it. He always says it is work related.

To be fair to him, he has cut back a lot. He doesn't drink hard liquor every night anymore but when he does he binges - usually once a week. I dread to think of the health effects.

Anyway! Thank you for replying! Sorry for the essay. I know my situation could be much worse than it is. It feels good to get it off my chest and see how other people are coping. x
 
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I loved the movie "when a man loves a woman", where Meg Ryan was an alcoholic, was in recovery and yet their relationship ended. I thought that was sad because there was so much love. Now that i am married to an alcoholic in recovery, i totally understand. For years i found empty or half bottles of alcohol hidden in the house. I would receive i text while i am at work from him, saying he has a headache so he is taking a nap, i must not wake him when i got home from work. I believed him. Reality was he was drunk and slept it off. When i found the bottles he lied to me and said - oh you must have overlooked that when you were cleaning, that is still from the last dinner party we had. And i am SO resentful of lies upon lies, and even in recovery he still hasnt apologized or acknowledged the fact that he lied to me. I thought i am the crazy one, he made me feel like the crazy one. How and when do i trust him again, when i can look me straight in the eye and talk the crap that he did. Now i know why a marriage can come to an end, and the pathetic part is that i am too scared to leave because that will make him start drinking again.
 
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I have experienced this with my dad and my late sister who passed away in may due to alcoholism. I also work within the drug and alcohol sector. They need to want to get better otherwise they won’t try (my experience) but I would recommend reaching out to a drug and alcohol service in your area. Most services provide help for non-users who are trying to support someone with addiction. Dependent on your area you may find We Are With You or CGL. They are two of the larger services in the country but there are also many more. (Just realising I’m assuming your in the uk). You may be able to find a supporting people service here too https://www.nhs.uk/service-search/other-services/Alcohol addiction/LocationSearch/1805
 
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My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
 
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My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
Sending you a BIG hug, i am glad that we can open up about these things together.
 
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My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
SO much of that resonates with me. Please know you're not alone and my DM's are open. ❤❤
 
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My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
Thats a feeling I have felt too and the anxiety at Christmas and gatherings that they may spoil it, you feel like you're treading on egg shells.

So many of us understand how this effects the support network. Please feel free to talk x
 
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SO much of that resonates with me. Please know you're not alone and my DM's are open. ❤❤
Thank you, it’s awful that you relate with some of the things I’ve said and I wish you didn’t but I’m glad that I’m not alone ❤
 
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My mum is a recovering alcoholic.She drank around a litre of vodka each day all through my teens and 20s. She ended up in hospital quite a few times,due to being drunk and then having seizures, when she would give up for a week or 2 and her body couldn't handle it. I never used to know what to do in them situations ring an ambulance for her to get to the hospital or not too as I felt bad using the emergency services to help her when it was drink related. She was in hospital 4 times within 2 years due to the seizures and always went back to the drink. The last time when she got out of hospital I thought to myself 2 weeks and she will be back drinking herself to oblivion again. 4 years since March and she hasn't had a drop of alcohol and is a completely different woman. I spent my teenage years being embarrassed of her, not wanting my friends to come around the house incase they judged her but now all I have for her is love and pride for what she has achieved. Hopefully there will be light at the end of your tunnels one day too.
 
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Thank you, it’s awful that you relate with some of the things I’ve said and I wish you didn’t but I’m glad that I’m not alone ❤
None of us are alone here. Whilst this wasn't the intention when I started the thread, I'm glad it's becoming a place of mutual support and understanding.

My mum is a recovering alcoholic.She drank around a litre of vodka each day all through my teens and 20s. She ended up in hospital quite a few times,due to being drunk and then having seizures, when she would give up for a week or 2 and her body couldn't handle it. I never used to know what to do in them situations ring an ambulance for her to get to the hospital or not too as I felt bad using the emergency services to help her when it was drink related. She was in hospital 4 times within 2 years due to the seizures and always went back to the drink. The last time when she got out of hospital I thought to myself 2 weeks and she will be back drinking herself to oblivion again. 4 years since March and she hasn't had a drop of alcohol and is a completely different woman. I spent my teenage years being embarrassed of her, not wanting my friends to come around the house incase they judged her but now all I have for her is love and pride for what she has achieved. Hopefully there will be light at the end of your tunnels one day too.
What an incredible story, I'm so pleased for you and your family. ❤
 
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What an incredible story, I'm so pleased for you and your family. ❤
[/QUOTE]

Thank you! It was a long journey with lots of mixed emotions: anger that she wouldn't stop for her family no matter how we pleaded. Sadness, that she felt that was the only way she could numb herself from her feelings. Confusion as to why she was doing it. When I would ask she just said she didn't know. Worry, that I would get a phone call any day with bad news. But still a huge amount of love for her, wanting her to get better but knowing it wouldn't happen until she was willing to do it herself.
 
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Sending lots of love to everyone who’s replies and has a loved one with addiction. It is honestly one of the worst things to have to go through.

I’ve got experience and my only advice would be tough love and try and live your life. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to get better or accept help. All you will do is ruin your life.

I know the anxiety can be overwhelming at first if you distance yourself but it will reduce over time.
 
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I feel during lockdown I've wanted to drink more even though i have ed I'm beginning to count down till wine o clock ☹my gran was alcoholic retired really young ,widowed and plenty £ I hoped it would have skipped the generations but recently seems to have skipped dad and hit me .my gran was lovely think she drank because she missed my papa so much I'm dealing with berivement and loss scared it will get worse it hits late night then I hit vodka and coke and red wine I'm early 40s why would I do this now ? ☹

My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
My mum is a functioning alcoholic. The first memory I have of her being drunk was 11 years ago when I was 9 and she fell down the stairs backwards after drinking heavily all afternoon and I had to phone my aunty to come and put me and my then 2 year old brother to bed. She is the most vile person when she’s had a drink, she verbally abused me from around 11 until when I moved out at 17.

Shes so nasty to anyone and everyone, she’ll lie about things and I remember one time she was so drunk and we were arguing and she had a knife and turned around and pretended to stab herself. It was the most traumatic thing I’ve experienced. She lied about me to all my family members and they thought I was the worst person and nasty to my mum for years. She used to walk into my room and just start being nasty for no reason. She drinks around 2-3 bottles of wine on her days off from work. She’s rang me in the morning before around 7 and she’s been drunk already. She lives with my brother and she still makes up lies about me. It’s really hard to deal with because when she hasn’t had a drink she is the best mum and nan to my children.
She’s kind, caring funny but as soon as she’s even had a sip of a drink she’s awful. I grew up with her constantly saying she wanted to die and about 3 years ago she had a breakdown and shaved off all her hair. She really made my mental health suffer for years and I tried to kill myself numerous times when I was 14. I worry for her so much, she won’t admit she’s got a problem even though deep down I know she knows she has. She’s got mental health problems but again won’t receive help for it. She loves my children but I can’t trust her to babysit them.
My grandparents and her brothers and sister have done nothing to help over the years, neither has my dad. He worked away and I basically had to look after myself. I’d come home from school and she’d be drunk. I came home one day and she wasn’t in and I had to sit at my next door neighbours for an hour until we saw her come home, she’d been at the pub and the owners had to carry her into the house. I was so embarrassed that I cried for hours, she won’t even remember that though.
Every birthday I can remember she’s been drunk and ruined, and every Christmas. I’m so glad I don’t spend Christmas with her anymore and I can create new memories because it was always so stressful having her argue with everyone all day and being angry at me when I’d done nothing wrong. I feel like she won’t be here in the next 10 years. She’s 53, I don’t want her to die I just want the alcoholic part of her to die. Sorry for the long post, I don’t get to talk to anyone about this. My partner knows and has seen what she’s like but I’m too embarrassed to bring it up anymore!
Please vent here if you need to other people's actions are not a reflection on you .it's not bad for you to want the negative element of their personalities to go away keep yourself safe and well
 
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Another outburst from my parent this evening on a family whatsapp chat over nothing (I had mentioned on my previous post that they often get into ‘disagreements’ during group chat online). We were trying to organise something and they made it all about them. The worst part is this group chat wasn’t just our family but extended family too. Parent ended up leaving the group and people were wondering if they said something wrong. I’m mortified and angry and although I don’t know for sure I can guarantee parent had been drinking this evening, they have a pattern and become SO sensitive/confrontational after a drink. This is happening more frequently over the years but very gradually if that makes sense. Like it’ll happen maybe once every couple of years, then once a year, now that’s 2/3 times this year. If this becomes more frequent, It’s going to divide our family something rotten and muggins here as the only child will be caught right in the middle.

It is exasperating being related to someone like this.
 
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Key is to protect yourself before helping others. I grew up with an alcoholic father and met my ex who had only recently become sober.

The two experiences were very different but both just as hard. You’re watching someone destroy themselves as well as watching a partner you love find themselves again and battle with the idea that they’ve lost themselves without drink. You’re constantly on edge and worry for them when things get tough.

Both my dad and ex were so sure they were ‘fine’ and any suggestion that they weren’t was met with deaf ears or diversion onto what was wrong with me.

People can only change when they decide themselves to do so. You can give them the resources and point them in the right direction and be there when they need a shoulder to cry on but you must remember that they may return to their old ways one day and you really really have to protect yourself for when/if that day does come.

I feel during lockdown I've wanted to drink more even though i have ed I'm beginning to count down till wine o clock ☹my gran was alcoholic retired really young ,widowed and plenty £ I hoped it would have skipped the generations but recently seems to have skipped dad and hit me .my gran was lovely think she drank because she missed my papa so much I'm dealing with berivement and loss scared it will get worse it hits late night then I hit vodka and coke and red wine I'm early 40s why would I do this now ? ☹
Loss is a hard thing to process and we all have different coping mechanisms to cope with it. You MUST remind yourself that you are your own person and not your Gran. Alcoholism doesn’t run in the blood, it can follow generations because of behaviour patterns seen in the early stages of development and throughout life.

This isn’t a bad thing you’ve noticed, this is in fact very good. You’re noticing a behaviour in yourself that isn’t good. It’s a signal to yourself that you’re creating a pattern that is self destructive and could ultimately lead to worse things. Right now you have the opportunity to tackle this.

Drink and drugs for the most part are used as a distraction to inner feelings that you can’t quite deal with right now. Perhaps you need to release the emotions you’ve felt after the bereavement? Or maybe you need to heal from the fear that one day you’ll end up like your Gran. Talking to someone will help, whether it’s a therapist or an anonymous person here! I personally use a few things such as CBD, yoga, swimming, CODA meetings (for codependency & for friends/family of alcoholics) and positive affirmations every night when I’ve felt low. It’s not easy, but they do help to reset negative thought patterns.

I wish you SO much happiness and hope. ❤
 
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Key is to protect yourself before helping others. I grew up with an alcoholic father and met my ex who had only recently become sober.

The two experiences were very different but both just as hard. You’re watching someone destroy themselves as well as watching a partner you love find themselves again and battle with the idea that they’ve lost themselves without drink. You’re constantly on edge and worry for them when things get tough.

Both my dad and ex were so sure they were ‘fine’ and any suggestion that they weren’t was met with deaf ears or diversion onto what was wrong with me.

People can only change when they decide themselves to do so. You can give them the resources and point them in the right direction and be there when they need a shoulder to cry on but you must remember that they may return to their old ways one day and you really really have to protect yourself for when/if that day does come.



Loss is a hard thing to process and we all have different coping mechanisms to cope with it. You MUST remind yourself that you are your own person and not your Gran. Alcoholism doesn’t run in the blood, it can follow generations because of behaviour patterns seen in the early stages of development and throughout life.

This isn’t a bad thing you’ve noticed, this is in fact very good. You’re noticing a behaviour in yourself that isn’t good. It’s a signal to yourself that you’re creating a pattern that is self destructive and could ultimately lead to worse things. Right now you have the opportunity to tackle this.

Drink and drugs for the most part are used as a distraction to inner feelings that you can’t quite deal with right now. Perhaps you need to release the emotions you’ve felt after the bereavement? Or maybe you need to heal from the fear that one day you’ll end up like your Gran. Talking to someone will help, whether it’s a therapist or an anonymous person here! I personally use a few things such as CBD, yoga, swimming, CODA meetings (for codependency & for friends/family of alcoholics) and positive affirmations every night when I’ve felt low. It’s not easy, but they do help to reset negative thought patterns.

I wish you SO much happiness and hope. ❤
thank you so much for your kind and wise words .My grief is because our puppy died of a brain tumour at only 15 weeks against my wishes my family got another puppy she only 10 months and has been diagnosed with lot of elbow problems.Although she is insured we just don't have enough resources financially and mentally to see her through this .She is going to charity foster carer in few weeks and hopefully she can get her problems sorted and lead a happy life .I'm scared for her feeling we've abandoned her when she needs us.She would be in a home environment and get all the care she needs .I just cry all the time with all the future things we would have done.think that's where the drink comes in .She good at going to her bed and settling.,I can't sleep so drink as a knockout.
 
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My sibling is a recovering alcoholic. Been dry 4 years. I rarely saw them drunk as tolerance was so high. My parents also drank every night. Not to excess but I remember my mum saying she didn’t want to stop when she started. My partner binge drinks at the weekend which I hate. I rarely drink. I’ve never liked the taste. I hate being around drunk people. Almost scares me?
 
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My sibling is a recovering alcoholic. Been dry 4 years. I rarely saw them drunk as tolerance was so high. My parents also drank every night. Not to excess but I remember my mum saying she didn’t want to stop when she started. My partner binge drinks at the weekend which I hate. I rarely drink. I’ve never liked the taste. I hate being around drunk people. Almost scares me?
Me too. I drink very little and know it's pretty much an attempt to control others drinking with my own. Whatever "it" is, I don't get it.

Good on your sibling. It must be so hard for you all. I hope your sibling is finding inner strength to stay sober. ❤
 
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Things between my husband and I are improving. I am still careful not the raise my expectations but i am starting to feel the love the house.
However as i am going through my journey i chose someone like my father which i never thought i would as it caused us children so much pain.
I love this man, i will stand by him and support him. Reminds of our first date where we got home and i stood on my kitchen island and sang to him the Brandy Carlise song, "the story" - you were made for me.
 
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