usefullyuseless

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Thread title suggestion

Tignam #20 Melissa Mills "Bari" Don't be fooled by the socks that I got, I'm still, I'm still Tignam from the squat
 
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JenTen

Member
🎼🎵🎶🎺

Ohhhhhhh, the covid outside is frightful,
But chanel wine is so delightful,
For once Tidge had a place to go,
Roly's in a bow, in a bow, in a bow!

Now the court cases are a droppin',
The Tattlers brought some corn for poppin',
The squats lights are turned down low,
In the NOT forever home, forever home, forever home!

Use my discount code for Spotlight,
You know I'm an INKKKKK-REDIBLE shiller,
The InstaPolice are so uptight,
I need the cash for my botox and filler!

Ohhhhhh, the gaff jacket sales are dyin',
Elderly Baby Daddy is a-cryin',
He said he's sad cos' he didn't get a blow,
Don't put Diddy on the phone, on the phone, on the phone!

🎶🎶🎶🎵🎺
 
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Balooba

VIP Member
Recap
So Tidge,as she is now affectionately known since she left her not forever home in the dead of night, is living it up in the sitting room of the clinical looking squat adorned with net curtains. It’s so gorgeous, she escapes as often as she can for the weekend in hotels spitting distance away and frequents eateries more than usual.
But if you like pasta then she’s your woman as she can throw this together in the kitchen we never see. She laments not being able to share her kids tantrums and underwear drawers because it deprives her of any content. But tattlers are so pass remarkable she had no choice. Her audience is devastated not witnessing these highlights. Us tattlers though are regularly treated to drunken rants and showing her true knacker side.
Tidge has taken it upon herself to be an advocate of all those who have suffered miscarriages and fertility issues. A noble cause if it wasn’t for the fact all is not as it seems.
We are desperately missing the legs up the stairs shots of old but we were treated to legs akimbo as a coil was inserted.TMI overload.
Family is so important to her and apparently she has seen her family so much over covid which is inkkkkredible as with all the naps and self care she’s some woman for one woman. It’s more inkkkkkkredible because she didn’t show any photos of each visit.
Being a fashion designer and wannabe DJ, our girl launched her longewear that looks like school uniform tracksuits coated in room spray for the MMB experience. Followed swiftly by premium polyester robes but pipped to the post by Ms McGregor launching houseboats coated in perfume spray and adulation from all the instahuns. Not even the karate belts to sleep in could sell for our Tidge so thoughts and prayers are with her at this difficult time.
Our girl is looking pretty malnourished these days and the drinking is taking its toll. But her perfect smile and inkkredible collab are saving the day. The teeth bleaching is sure to fulfill her nutritional needs washed down with plenty of booze.
Life is generally just amaaaaaaszing for Tidge, despite last week filming herself crying in bed. Wonderful things are coming. Maybe styling longewear with karate belts? How to style your outfit for day trips to the High Court as surely you’ll be seen on the news?
Tidge has taken up skipping and cutting booze to weekends only. An admission it was weekday drinking alone.
There was a trip to the cinema with a “friend” she hadn’t seen in ages… an ideal location not to have to listen to the antics of someone on the run.
Plenty of omg my fake hair is so magnificent and fake designer bags on show along with poor quality massively oversized coats. Unless you’re swamped in a completely massive size 14 when you’re a tiny shapeless size 8 maximum, like what’s the point?
we await with so much excitement the High Court Chronicles for the little man.
 
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Cantturn222

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1993AB80-F019-4E44-B092-81679C8D1D6C.png

I clearly still have covid and too much time on my hands
So tigs were did your inspiration come
From for Christmas stockkkkkkkkkkkkkk
 
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I got up at 5am

VIP Member
Is this thread about Melissa’s bragging or everyone else’s bragging? 😂😂😂 shopping in BT isn’t the flex people seem to think it is
 
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Missheg

Member
So I wondered what kinda sales this lady would generate from the tatty robes. So from the benefit of us all I took a screenshot of the number for sale under each type of robe. Basically I input ‘200’ items for each robe and it showed max I could purchase which makes me think that’s the number in stock at launch time of 4pm

Breakdown as follows at time of launch (4pm)- Yesil - 197
Sari - 149
Lavanta - 193
Mavi -197
Total Circa 735 robes

for ye gals on tattle I then redid this exercise a few moments ago.
Yesil - 190
Sari - 137
Lavanta - 189
Mavi -189
Total 705 robes left in stock
In summary there is 30 people that have more money than sense and who purchased these awful looking robes!
your welcome
 
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I’m thinking she’s gone back to flat living. She loved the old one they lived in that had a gate use to go around boasting she lives in a gated community like she lives in Beverly Hills or something. Maybe makes her feel safer from nidge and the gang. Well the whole lady of the manor persona has gone out the window for her now. And some home truths finally coming out about azhars shady business dealings and her own family have always been dodgy. As I’ve always known they would. How the mighty have fallen. It’ll be fun to watch how she tries to navigate this with her bullshit and lies. Maybe people will realise the obscene money they have spent on cheap Chinese tat is exactly that, and not the luxury robes and pjs this phony tried to sell. Don’t be fooled by the rocks that tigs got cause they are all fake.
🎵Dont be fooled by the rocks that shes got,

She buys wine in aldi not thomasssss foxrock 🎵🎶🎶
 
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The Foz

Well-known member
New thread title suggestion:

Melissa Mills ‘Bari’ #19: Tiny Tim and Tiggy Dim together make Mauritius look grim
 
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Seif seriously needs to grow up. A boy in second year has absolutely no business watching the toy show. I remember what I was getting up to when I was that age and it certainly didn’t involve dressing up in pjs with Mum on a Fri night. It’s very sad really
I'm sorry I don't agree my 14yr old watched it and loved it. Thats like saying no adult is allowed to watch the toy show. All his mates were watching it at home. What do you expect him to do hang around street corners or sit in his room playing computers on his own. We had a great laugh watching it, fire lit and treats. A nice family night. Im in no way a supporter of tigs but I don't agree with you on this.
 
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Hereforthefacts

Chatty Member
Good one! 👏👏👏 So any comment that isn't negative or nasty must be from her? Did it ever cross your mind that I'm just a concerned adult. The number of women that drop in comments about how they raise their children is crazy. Like perhaps show kindness to others & actually be a half decent role model to your daughters! I just see a generation on nasty little girls that are thought they arnt accountable for their actions or words towards others! It quiet sad this it what you are training your children to be
Ah Tigs when will you ever learn to use quiet and quite correctly 🤭
 
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JenTen

Member
The Inkkkredible Kelis, but I subsequently made it classy!

🎶 🎶 🎶

My milkshake brings Azhar to the squat,
And he's like "you bought a bowl of moss?
Damn it, Tidge!, you're having a larf,
I'll teach you, you get it free in the park".

My milkshake brings Azhar to the squat,
And he's like "you are completely locked!
Damn it, Tidge!, it's 2 o'clock.
I'll teach you, to make orange squash".

You know I want it,
The thing that got me,
On all 4's on the stockroom floor,
In Tullamore,
The B for my,
MM is mine.

La la la la la,
Bad cash flow,
La la la la la,
Ronnie's old as Ken Barlow,
La la la la la,
Brenda from Sligo,
La la la la la,
......fellatio......

My milkshake brings Azhar to the squat,
And he's like "are they hooker boots?
Damn it Tidge!, I'm fighting 3 lawsuits,
Wear vee-jay's, you're like an escort!"

My milkshake brings Azhar to the squat,
And he's like "what's today's celeb look?
Damn it Tidge!, you're like Danniella Westbrook,
I can tell you, RHW you're not!"

You know I want it,
The thing that got me,
On all 4's on the stockroom floor,
In Tullamore,
The B for my,
MM is mine.

La la la laundry,
Balding's phoning,
La la la laundry,
Balding's hating,
La la la laundry,
Balding's's swilling, 🍻
La la la laundry
She's urinating.

🎶🎶🎶
 
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usefullyuseless

VIP Member
❤ Heart react this post if you think Tigs will bring the kids to Disneyland
😆 Laugh react this post if you think she won't
🤢 Sick react this post if you think Tigs will spend the trip guzzling French wine
 
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JenTen

Member
Shall we have another sing along??

🎶 🎶 🎶 🎶 🎶 🎶

Deck the squat with bowls of moss,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Had an affair with my boss,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Don me now housecoat apparel,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
I love wine, I'll drink a barrel,
Fa la la la la la la la la.

All the Tattlers are big fuckers,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Try stop me selling tat to suckers,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
You are jealous, I'm such a pro,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
My pal agree's... Brenda from Sligo,
Fa la la la la la la la la.

I'm CEO, I'm not a bimbo,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Pose on stairs with legs akimbo,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Tag the empties, I'm so grabby,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Need to pay for Abu Dhabi,
Fa la la la la la la la la.

I'm beautiful, my hair is gorgeous,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Eyebrows done, they look enormous,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Our fav eye-riding, swigging mistress,
Fa la la la la la la la la,
Tattlers - have a lovely Christmas, 💕
Fa la la la la la la la LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

🎶 🎶🎶🎶🎶
 
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Jox

Chatty Member
Listing her jobs:
Gonna go for croissant and hot chocolate
Bring kid to work
Collect other kid
“It’s gonna be a DAY of it”
Fecks sake. Wanna get up at 6, get dinner on, kids ready, drop to school, belt it to work, work til 530, collect kids, home, eat dinner, clean breakfast things, make tomorrow’s lunches, try to help with homework, put News on at 9 and wake up freezing on the couch at 945, empty school bags, find note looking for 12.50 for locker, hunt for 1250 and envelope, realise dog hasn’t been walked, go up to say you’re going to hoof it around the estate with dog, daughter says she’s no sanitary towels and just started period...leg it to Spar, buy ST’s leave shop to find empty dog lead tied to bin, run around looking for dog, find dog in garden of huge house trying it on with what looks like a fox, break up this session meanwhile realise ive set security light off in persons garden, jump 5foot in the air as i catch sight of s crazy woman with leaves in hair out of breath clutching an empty pack of Always Ultra, realise it’s my own reflection. Pick up 3 ST’s to get daughter through tomorrow, get dog, jog home, too tired to shower, day begins at 530 today to try to fit more in.
Now THERES a day Tignam.
There’s a fucking day.
 
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storminagcup

Chatty Member
New thread suggestion: Tidge and her moonlight flit, owns nothing but a pile of shit, in search of her forever home, won't get a mortgage but will get Jo Malone
 
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