Would anyone care to join me for a Valentine's serenade, dedicated to Tattler's favourite pilot?? (I got a little help from Mariah Carey
).
There's a hero,
If you look in the airport,
The girls are queuing to be laid,
By Juan Corr,
PPE from China,
Patron Saint of aviation,
Saviour of our nation,
It was love at first flight.
And then a hero comes along,
Nice landing, Sean,
And your cock...pit is so sexy,
Oh! Take me up the Betsy!
And when you wear your uniform,
You give Tattlers the horn,
And your Dad jokes are so smooth,
A hero lies in you.
When you know, you know
In your bathroom with timezones,
My not so Secret Obsession,
The bar's set low,
You can find love,
If you search in duty free,
So buckle up your seat belt,
For some dirty whoopee!
And then a hero comes along,
Captain First Officer Juan,
Run your fingers through my hair,
And then whisper 'Ryanair.........'
I know you're not like other boys,
They don't have the airplane toys,
And we'll finally have a smooch,
A hero lies in you.
Oh-oooooooh! Lord knows!
I am very shallow,
You know dearest Juan,
I'm a divaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
But hold on,
My parents spelt it wrong,
It's actually pronounced,
EEEEEEEEEEEEEffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
And then a hero comes along,
It's you, petit Juan,
And if I may be so blunt,
It's actually my birthday month,
So someone #gift me a new front door,
For airport-themed Castle Corr,
I love being cabin crew,
Isn't Devlin slang for poo??....
(whispers)....isn't Devlin slang for poo...