Thanks a million. I did think about that but I don’t like the idea of taking up a charity’s time when it isn’t an abuse type situationDifficult to say without details (which I obviously understand you don't want to share). You could call NSPCC and see what they advise.
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NSPCC Helpline
You can contact the NSPCC Helpline by calling 0808 800 5000, emailing help@NSPCC.org.uk or completing our report abuse online form.www.nspcc.org.uk
The charity won't mind and won't view it as a waste of their time. They would rather you got in touch than not.Thanks a million. I did think about that but I don’t like the idea of taking up a charity’s time when it isn’t an abuse type situation
If its not an abuse matter, and the child is very much loved for and cared for, then they are right, you should butt out and its nothing to do with you.The child is NOT at any risk of abuse of any type, or severe neglect.
I won’t go in to any detail on a public forum. But there are things going on in the home that worry me. It’s not a social services matter. The child is very much loved and cared for.
I respect your opinion but I can’t help worrying when I’m seeing the effects every day. And I know if I could go in to details the majority of mothers here would agree.If its not an abuse matter, and the child is very much loved for and cared for, then they are right, you should butt out and its nothing to do with you.
Each family goes through their own individual problems and gets through them eventually.
Unless you live in that house, and you don't know what's really going on, I would keep my nose out. Maybe keep an eye from a distance, but don't make trouble where its not wanted.
That obviously doesn’t sound ideal but it doesn’t sound like something that is particularly out of the ordinary unfortunately, and it’s certainly not the level to be contacting child cruelty charities and social services.Imagine there are parents that only eat junk food. Fried foods at breakfast, sweets and crisps all day long and fast food for dinner. Nobody eats anything fresh or remotely healthy and the kids are fed the same way.
Which is why I’ve said I wouldn’t contact social services or take up a charity’s time.That obviously doesn’t sound ideal but it doesn’t sound like something that is particularly out of the ordinary unfortunately, and it’s certainly not the level to be contacting child cruelty charities and social services.
One thing that will damage the child is social services being all over their mother because somebody overstepped the mark unnecessarily. So I’d think VERY carefully before you do anything.
Surely if the child is 4, they will be heading to school or be in nursery. If there is genuinely anything to be concerned about or the child is unhappy the school will pick up on it and take the appropriate action.Which is why I’ve said I wouldn’t contact social services or take up a charity’s time.
I’ve been thinking very carefully for 4 years. It could be argued that a child’s welfare is everyone’s business as they can’t speak for themselves.
The educational psychologist has picked it up but her reports were dismissed as being wrong and advice ignored. The health visitor hasn’t made a home visit in over a year.Surely if the child is 4, they will be heading to school or be in nursery. If there is genuinely anything to be concerned about or the child is unhappy the school will pick up on it and take the appropriate action.
Unless the mother in incapable or unwilling to look after her child (which you’ve confirmed she’s not) then her child’s welfare is no ones business but hers.
I'm sorry but I think this is nothing to do with you, reading all the above replies. You think the mother needs help, that's your opinion. Which you are entitled to. Doesn't mean its right. I think alot of people need help, doesn't mean I stick my nose in where it isn't wanted. You've done what you can, you have spoken to the family, that's all you can do.The educational psychologist has picked it up but her reports were dismissed as being wrong and advice ignored. The health visitor hasn’t made a home visit in over a year.
The parents aren’t incapable, but unwilling, yes. The child is fed and clean but there’s a lot more to it. Yes, the little one is severely disabled but that’s not to do with the issue.
I think the mother needs help, but they don’t see it as a problem.
butt out.The grandparents and others involved agree.
I feel the same.Sorry, but you have really ruffled my feathers, some people just can't keep their nose out of others business.
Coming of here and being so vague about a situation you think is so serious is pointless. You’re not going to get any helpful advice because no one knows what the situation actually is. Even if you did tell us it would be completely one sided, which isn’t really fair.Yes I am family. And am very much involved with the child. I was at all the scans and the hospital for the birth (I was invited to be as it’s very close family. I wasn’t butting in in that department)
I was so excited about this baby and the mother called me mummy number 2 before they were even born and that’s how it’s always been. They’ve only ever been minded by anybody else a handful of times. They’ve asked me to take them to medical appointments, to take and collect from nursery. I know they aren’t my child and I try never to interfere. But this situation has just got so bad that I don’t know where to turn.
I’m really sorry that I’ve upset anyone In tho thread. I feel terrible about that. I never want to upset anybody.
I know I’m mum shaming and shouldn’t be. If I could explain the situation. I wish I could. Maybe it would be possible if I obviously didn’t include names or any identifying details.
I was left a widow with a 6 year old, a 3 year old and newborn twins that were brought up completely on my own for the last 16 years. I know very well how hard it is to be a mum.
I don’t think it’s wrong to see a child you love and want life to be better for them. I can’t help worrying. I have the child all day on a Friday and the effects of the situation are really upsetting to see.
Again, I’m really deeply sorry if I’ve upset anybody. I just so want this little one to be happy and feel it’s all so unfair. They’ve started hitting themselves which I know is frustration but it all just gets ignored as not being a problem.
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