The Tim Tracker #128 Not-so-Good Vibrations

[Cold&Bitter]

Who gets a heart attack first?

Tim, Nate, Or Michael Alder (Formerly Michael Karlsberg - also known as Michael Kay. Brother of David Kay)

The Tim Tracker #129 He’s a Tracker; he’s a snacker; he’s a (potential) heart attacker

 

[Quasimodo]

Recap from what I remember of the past few painfully boring vlogs:

• Dim demonstrated his jaw is actually more unhinged than his first-born son.
• Dim, who makes up his own schedule, went to Animal Kingdom the day before Earth Day/AK's actual 25th anniversary.
• Dim doesn't know how to use a knife or a fork or a spoon, continued
• Dim likes to keep his nails long to be able to catch extra boogers/greasy skin residue/dirt/butt dust/frosting/meat juice (what kind of meat? we'll leave that vague) under his nails to eat/lick later
• Dim likes fondling fake leather that he thinks is real
• Dim doesn't want to be a part of the itty bitty titty committee and is eating his way to having enough moob to fill a c-cup bra.

 

[VloggerCritic]

How to do Disney with an infant? Don't. Just stay home it will still be there when your child is old enough to enjoy it. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

 

[HaroldTheWalrus]

This upcoming week is BIG fellow tattlers. Big baby turns 2 months old on Saturday I believe so he should be getting his shots. Then the flood gates should open. Big babys 1st time at Disney, Big baby’s first time at Disney Springs and on and on and on. I am curious if it will be the Big Baby Show exclusively or will J$ make an appearance? I guess we will wait and see.

Also,

“Big Baby’s first rollercoaster trauma”
“Big Baby’s first defective Disney balloon”
“Big Baby’s first meeting with Donald’s booty butt”
”Big Baby’s first defective Disney balloon, five days later”

not to mention “We bought Disney hotdogs, but accidentally left Big Baby on the People Mover. All in all, it was a fantastic day.”.

 

[hcslacs]

She said they are both making sacrifices. He takes Buddy places and also goes to “work” so he’s missing out on time with Big Babe. She’s staying home with BB so she’s missing out on fun times.

Say you hate having kids without saying you hate having kids.

 

[xmasbdaygirl]

Really with the Aura frame commercial again?

I understand what he's doing with the Country Bears should go bit. He's looking to get the viewers fired up to comment. But he's wrong. If you bring your kids into Country Bears, some kids will end up being Country Bears fans, even if it's just for the AC. Why hasn't J$ been to Country Bears? Because his parents suck. I bet he would actually love it.

And he's really full of shit with the Muppets. We go to Muppets 3D every time we go to Hollywood Studios and that show always has a ton of people in it. People enjoy it, they laugh like they've never heard the jokes before. And if you are a good parent, and you bring your kids to those attractions instead of forcing them on roller coasters, they will have fond memories of it as well because you are there with them. My kids didn't grow up with the Muppets like I did, and they both absolutely love Muppets 3D. They quote Bean Bunny all the time. Another show J$ would probably absolutely love.

We were there a few weeks ago, there was a young man, maybe 20ish, he had some sort of developmental disability and was mostly nonverbal from what I could tell. But he loved Miss Piggy. He was a few rows ahead of us. He kept yelling out PIG! PIG! every time she came on the screen and was super excited. His mother tried her best to get him to hush and calm down but I don't think anyone in that not one empty seat theater was bothered by him because he had just pure joy in seeing Miss Piggy. So fuck you, Tim. People like the Muppets and Country Bears, they just don't like you and your useless wife.

 

[Snippysnips]

She said they are both making sacrifices. He takes Buddy places and also goes to “work” so he’s missing out on time with Big Babe. She’s staying home with BB so she’s missing out on fun times.

Say you hate having kids without saying you hate having kids.

I can't believe she said they are making sacrifices, she needs slapped the fuck about with a dictionary to know what that means

I'll tell you, you worthless bitch what sacrifices are, sacrifices are when you are working away for weeks or months risking you life to give your family a better life, sacrifices is missing everything in your child's life like bdays, first days of schools, graduations, Xmas, new year etc so your family can have a roof over their heads an food on the table, THATS SACRIFICES,

Sacrifices is NOT hiring a nanny so you don't need to deal with the children you have fucking brought into the world you selfish bitch

God she pisses me off, my dad worked away on the oil rigs from when my brother was born, there was no holidays or paternity leave, his "holidays" an "time off" were when he come home between shifts, sometimes it was a week at home sometimes two, an his training needed done in his time off as well, so my mum was on her own when he was away with the two of us, thankfully his rigs he was on never had emergencys but he did work with the survivors of the piper Alpha an those stories still haunt me to this day, but there are MANY parents who sacrifice a ton for their family's, from those that are on oil rigs, to those in the mines an those that go an serve their country, she has no fking right to ever call their life a damn sacrifice

 

[BoPeeps78]

He my not hit every ride in one theme park in a year, but he sure will hit every wiener in each park in that time.

 

[xmasbdaygirl]

So Baby O is almost 2 months old and Jenn seems disappointed that he's not just feeding and going back to sleep. She's a great mom you guyz. The absolute best. She seems almost deranged at this point with just her and the baby. She makes a giant sandwich, says she eats half, then comes back and says she at the other half. She then explains that Tim puts the baby to bed between 8:30 and 9:30 while she makes dinner. She's going to make dinner for herself after Baby O goes to bed. She then shows 9:36 on the monitor. She's eating 2nd dinner at almost 10pm?

J$ has a friend with that little trampoline. They've been trying to find a way to get him to not jump on the couch, so they bought him the trampoline. Now he's jumping on the couch less. Um---how about you tell the kid, don't jump on the couch. No. Stop. Don't do that. You don't buy him another piece of crap for your house. If you don't want your child to do something, it is your job as a parent to discipline them. How in the world can you suck this much at being parents.

 

[Orangebird]

I don't know how it's so hard for them to watch two kids. Tim has a lazy/droopy eye that's always in one direction anyway, so he should have double the coverage on kids

The TimTracker #129: I have a lazy eye AND a lazy wife

 

[airbusA330]

Just felt like it was time for this again

 

[xmasbdaygirl]

I think there are a lot of tears in the Bojo house today. JoJo has officially hit 1 million subs and every DCL fan page is posting pics of the first official 25th anniversary sailing. It sucks to suck, Trackers.

 

[lorianne]

In the last video when Tim and Jackson went bowling and to Top Golf, Tim spends way too much time saying what Jackson is "not good at". Way to insult him Tim....awful parenting!

 

[Mopsy75]

I agree with @Quasimodo 10000000%. Home vlog coming this week about raising 2 children and how hard it is you guyzzzzzz. Jenn can't be out of the spotlight for too long. It's coming.....

 

[Loueylouay]

My first visit to WDW was in 1983 as a small child, and I remember waiting for the Country Bear Jamboree and sitting on the benches in the theater, and they announced that the show had technical difficulties and the theatre was emptied. We came back in 1986 and finally saw it----we grew up within walking distance to a Showbiz Pizza Place, where Billy Bob the animatronic bear actually talked to the kids on their birthday---and my parents were like "that was it? Showbiz is better." They were a tough crowd, I remember they couldn't stand the Tiki Room either.

I actually liked the "Vacation Hoedown" version of the show. I was surprised when it closed and they brought back the original.

I was going to say....we didn't go often to the Tiki room either but my mom did actually like it. We didn't go much because I was the one who hated it lol. My father even more. Just wanted to add something on a personal note. My father who was 98 passed away the other day. We have so many memories from Disney. My dad was a jokester constantly. Every ride we went on he made jokes about it. Example...Small World, this is child labor...Pirates, you will never get the red head because you stink of booze....but the best laughs were in the HM, in the stretching room he would tap my mom on the shoulder to scare her and on the ride I would sit with him in one car and my sister and my mom in another and he would reach over and knock on theirs.....he wasn't fond of our neighbor...so when we got to the death certificate lady...he would say "Beverly" what are you doing here.
We hardly listened to the Jungle Cruise skipper because my dad would be doing his own monologue.
Everytime we went to Hoop Dee Doo, he knew they would pick him for that ballerina guy especially because he would joke around with all the servers.
Sorry...just hope everyone gets a little laugh.

 

[Quasimodo]

Dim makes Ginn turn back a page on a library book of Buddy's (you know, the ones he gets unhinged around), and he says "you can see his little BOOTY HOLE."

His pornhub search history is probably: "booty butt" "bootyhole cartoons" "Donald duck booty" "hutdogs with mayo" "Mickey and Donald fantasy" "chocolate chip cookies and weeners" "Chip and Dale caught in bed"

 

[hcslacs]

Lori clears up why it's ok for the baby to go to the grocery store. Apparently people in your own community don't have germs. Only foreigners.

 

[chitownzee]

Does dim think three year olds should just naturally good at everything? The kid is THREE. He needs to be taught, and coached, and practice regularly….oh and along the way….not constantly told he’s not good at it before he has a chance. That won’t make him want to stick with it and keep trying. It WILL give more trauma to talk about with his therapist later. “My dad always told me I was bad at everything. My mom was mad she had to spend time with me instead of going to Disney with just my dad.”

FFS DIMOTHY!!! You’re hurting your kid! Tell him he’s doing great! “What a great try buddy, good job! Omg Jackson, you got so many more pins this time! (even if it’s only 1)
Great job rolling the ball this time, it was so fast! Hi five buddy, you got one!”
It’s really not that hard! I’m not saying he should get a trophy for trying, but his parents words should sing his praises, not point out his flaws and tear him down.

You are shit parents! Those poor boys! They deserve so much better than your selfishness, and criticism, and resentment for their existence and taking away your old lives. SHIT PARENTS. SHIT!

Why the fuck can’t they spend some time with him at home playing candy land as chutes and ladders. Teaching the rules and playing by them. Letting him win sometimes. Give him nice quality time with his parents that builds him up and feels good, with age appropriate games he has a shot of becoming “good” at.

He must feel so bad about himself with those two talking shit to a camera instead of raising him.

Since you don’t talk to family or have any actually friends…freaking read some parenting books or something. Take a class. SOMETHING.

I hate them.

 

[peteykirch]

Jesus they are bringing two god damn fans with them to go to the Star Wars Hotel.

---
Ginn seems perplexed that Dim's Star Cruiser booking was only 1/3rd full because Disney gave this amazing discount...

Ginn 30% off of 5k is still a shit ton of money for the average person for a 2 night hotel stay.

SHE IS SO FUCKING OUT OF TOUCH.

 

[DisNuts]

Jenn, I’m not sure what your husband is doing all day but he’s not out there working long hours. We can all see that from the videos you are releasing. Stop lying and stop playing the victim of poor you being stuck at home all day with the big baby. Get your shit together and learn how to drive and start taking on some real-life responsibility. The hardest worker you have in your home is the nanny. You are an embarrassment to society.