The Chateau Diaries #164 Dan The Man is Done and Dusted

[Arfarf]

The T Rex Take: Dana's latest cooking vlog popped up in my feed. I find them truly entertaining, as I always discover new techniques (that I will never use). Tonight, in her part 1 of a 3 part miniseries "DIY Gastronomic Full Course Meal in a Shitoo?", Dana explained the first course was roasted eggplant with smoked trout, goat cheese, trout roe and balsamic-cream glaze. She realized her bottle of balsamic glaze had expired, and decided to make a creamy balsamic reduction. (For this, Dana was awarded a gold star, as no one else at the Shitoo would notice something so trivial as an expiration date.) I found it odd that Dana did not "sweat" the eggplant before dousing it in olive oil and roasting it in the oven (@billybudd , I know you noticed that!) , but that step was not needed as she literally burned the shyte out of it- the hardened blackened discs made a satisfying thunk as she dumped them from the pan. I also found her technique at cutting herbs fascinating- "Dana don't need no kitchen shears!"- she used a nefarious-looking chopping knife to cut thyme, and what appeared to be a bread knife to saw chives- all while being precariously perched atop stiletto heels- this woman lives dangerously. She assembles the dish, and placed far too much roe atop, along with hacked chives. Footage of her seated and attempting to saw into the crunchy layers of eggplant with a butter knife- this was my favourite part. Everyone oohs and aahs (even Herr Nuti fears Dana), and Pavlina politely remarks she had never thought of such a combination of smoked trout with eggplant. Dana's cooking will never be Michelin- worthy, but I will give her one Goodyear star, based on the T Rex tyre-rating system. Work harder, Dana- someday you may earn a Pirelli star!

She needs to just stop. What a joke! Thanks for watching, T-Rex, and posting the review. We owe you one!

 

[T Rex]

She needs to just stop. What a joke! Thanks for watching, T-Rex, and posting the review. We owe you one!

You're welcome @Arfarf ! But I can't be mad- I do find them incredibly entertaining (even better after a few Miller Lites), and moreso than the latest Shitoo vlogs. They are kind of like the old "My Drunk Kitchen" videos, but without meaning to be so!

 

[billybudd]

The T Rex Take: Dana's latest cooking vlog popped up in my feed. I find them truly entertaining, as I always discover new techniques (that I will never use). Tonight, in her part 1 of a 3 part miniseries "DIY Gastronomic Full Course Meal in a Shitoo?", Dana explained the first course was roasted eggplant with smoked trout, goat cheese, trout roe and balsamic-cream glaze. She realized her bottle of balsamic glaze had expired, and decided to make a creamy balsamic reduction. (For this, Dana was awarded a gold star, as no one else at the Shitoo would notice something so trivial as an expiration date.) I found it odd that Dana did not "sweat" the eggplant before dousing it in olive oil and roasting it in the oven (@billybudd , I know you noticed that!) , but that step was not needed as she literally burned the shyte out of it- the hardened blackened discs made a satisfying thunk as she dumped them from the pan. I also found her technique at cutting herbs fascinating- "Dana don't need no kitchen shears!"- she used a nefarious-looking chopping knife to cut thyme, and what appeared to be a bread knife to saw chives- all while being precariously perched atop stiletto heels- this woman lives dangerously. She assembles the dish, and placed far too much roe atop, along with hacked chives. Footage of her seated and attempting to saw into the crunchy layers of eggplant with a butter knife- this was my favourite part. Everyone oohs and aahs (even Herr Nuti fears Dana), and Pavlina politely remarks she had never thought of such a combination of smoked trout with eggplant. Dana's cooking will never be Michelin- worthy, but I will give her one Goodyear star, based on the T Rex tyre-rating system. Work harder, Dana- someday you may earn a Pirelli star!

I must confess I do not sweat eggplant after reading food scientist Harold McGee. (And a hilarious restaurant kitchen experience where we sweated about three tons of it on cloth dish towels, producing the eggplant version of the Shroud of Turin. Shhhh, don't tell.)
Nuking it to collapse oil-sucking cellular structure works for me as McGee suggests, to make caponata, the really good Cooks' mag version.
I also make a (Cypriot?) roasted eggplant and almond dip, which requires me only to remember to fork the whole eggplant all over so it doesn't explode in the oven. Don't ask me how I know this.
I think eggplant would be okay, ish, with smoked trout, but it's so ugly I wouldn't serve it to guests. Unless tricked out with grill marks and/or a glam sauce as in caponata, Parm, etc.? I think I'd prefer something less gooshy in a smoked trout/cheese dish. Like good toasts? How'd you fox it up?

 

[T Rex]

I must confess I do not sweat eggplant after reading food scientist Harold McGee. (And a hilarious restaurant kitchen experience where we sweated about three tons of it on cloth dish towels, producing the eggplant version of the Shroud of Turin. Shhhh, don't tell.)
Nuking it to collapse oil-sucking cellular structure works for me as McGee suggests, to make caponata, the really good Cooks' mag version.
I also make a (Cypriot?) roasted eggplant and almond dip, which requires me only to remember to fork the whole eggplant all over so it doesn't explode in the oven. Don't ask me how I know this.
I think eggplant would be okay, ish, with smoked trout, but it's so ugly I wouldn't serve it to guests. Unless tricked out with grill marks and/or a glam sauce as in caponata, Parm, etc.? I think I'd prefer something less gooshy in a smoked trout/cheese dish. Like good toasts? How'd you fox it up? It sounds like she chopped the thyme twigs into the dish? This I've gotta see.

@billybudd- interesting to know about not sweating it! I usually sweat the discs (or cut it sideways for lasagna) for 10 min, rinse, pat, brush on some EVO, and grilI for a few min on each side (I love grill marks, and like to get a good cross-hatch pattern.) I'm actually roasting an eggplant tomorrow for baba ganoush (which doesn't need to be sweated- I need to use up some Tahini, so have some chickpeas soaking for hummus as well.) Seriously watch the video- there was nothing gooshy about the eggplant- more the opposite! The whole time I was laughing and thinking of you- "Oh vey, @billybudd would have plenty to say! This is gold!" You're welcome, bae!

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

She needs to just stop. What a joke! Thanks for watching, T-Rex, and posting the review. We owe you one!

She should ask Annalease to do something about her fried dried hair, and that whole meal looked disgusting and she prepared it in the filthy kitchen. Did you see the wall behind the stovetop. Greasy grimey

 

[billybudd]

@billybudd- interesting to know about not sweating it! I usually sweat the discs (or cut it sideways for lasagna) for 10 min, rinse, pat, brush on some EVO, and grilI for a few min on each side (I love grill marks, and like to get a good cross-hatch pattern.) I'm actually roasting an eggplant tomorrow for baba ganoush (which doesn't need to be sweated- I need to use up some Tahini, so have some chickpeas soaking for hummus as well.) Seriously watch the video- there was nothing gooshy about the eggplant- more the opposite! The whole time I was laughing and thinking of you- "Oh vey, @billybudd would have plenty to say! This is gold!" You're welcome, bae!

Proud of you for grilling it. I think that's the way I like it best.

 

[M&MsMom]

I must confess I do not sweat eggplant after reading food scientist Harold McGee. (And a hilarious restaurant kitchen experience where we sweated about three tons of it on cloth dish towels, producing the eggplant version of the Shroud of Turin. Shhhh, don't tell.)
Nuking it to collapse oil-sucking cellular structure works for me as McGee suggests, to make caponata, the really good Cooks' mag version.
I also make a (Cypriot?) roasted eggplant and almond dip, which requires me only to remember to fork the whole eggplant all over so it doesn't explode in the oven. Don't ask me how I know this.
I think eggplant would be okay, ish, with smoked trout, but it's so ugly I wouldn't serve it to guests. Unless tricked out with grill marks and/or a glam sauce as in caponata, Parm, etc.? I think I'd prefer something less gooshy in a smoked trout/cheese dish. Like good toasts? How'd you fox it up?

I don't sweat my eggplant, either, unless it's really large and been in my fridge for awhile (which rarely happens). And since I only buy eggplant from a market stand vs. the grocery store, I don't worry too much about it being old. I just bought some Japanese eggplant today which I'll make tomorrow with some ginger and I have decided what else yet.

I think smoked trout would not be so great with that thing she made. Balsamic vinegar, reduced or not (and I love how she mixed up three or four different bottles of it! I'm joking......I didn't love it!) seems to me not a perfect ingredient with smoked trout. I'd put it on little toasts, like you mentioned, with some fennel fronds (which I would, of course, hack down from the garden with a chain saw, tantamount to what I saw Dana doing to those poor chives with her serrated knife!) and creme fraiche. Maybe some salmon roe, but not as much as she used. Might sound boring, but my tastebuds like to keep it simple with smoked trout, lox, etc. so I can actually taste the fish!

And I so agree with you @T Rex ! She is hilarious to watch!

 

[T Rex]

She should ask Annalease to do something about her fried dried hair, and that whole meal looked disgusting and she prepared it in the filthy kitchen. Did you see the wall behind the stovetop. Greasy grimey

That wall is literally a hot mess- even Dawn Powerwash (which is incredible in it's own right) might meet its match at degreasing that wall! I am not certain why Dana thought that hair was a good look- girl, you went to bed with wet hair, woke up and went to the Shitoo. Dana looked like a Yeti. The short period of "surf hair" has since passed- Annaliese needs to hook her up with a deep condition and a good gloss treatment.

 

[M&MsMom]

Dana's eggplant could have been used as a frisbee!

 

[T Rex]

I think smoked trout would not be so great with that thing she made. Balsamic vinegar, reduced or not (and I love how she mixed up three or four different bottles of it! I'm joking......I didn't love it!) seems to me not a perfect ingredient with smoked trout. I'd put it on little toasts, like you mentioned, with some fennel fronds (which I would, of course, hack down from the garden with a chain saw, tantamount to what I saw Dana doing to those poor chives with her serrated knife!) and creme fraiche. Maybe some salmon roe, but not as much as she used. Might sound boring, but my tastebuds like to keep it simple with smoked trout, lox, etc. so I can actually taste the fish!

And I so agree with you @T Rex ! She is hilarious to watch!

I agree @M&MsMom - smoked trout on Holland Rusks with a dollop of creme fraiche, a tiny spoon of caviar, and a few finely chopped chives atop. You had me laughing at the chain saw! There was far too much going on with this dish!

Dana's eggplant could have been used as a frisbee!

View attachment 1441413

I thought the very same thing! I mean, with the never-been-used billiard table out of commission, the guests need another form of entertainment!

 

[M&MsMom]

That wall is literally a hot mess- even Dawn Powerwash (which is incredible in it's own right) might meet its match at degreasing that wall! I am not certain why Dana thought that hair was a good look- girl, you went to bed with wet hair, woke up and went to the Shitoo. The short period of "surf hair" has since passed- Annaliese needs to hook her up with a deep condition and a good gloss treatment.

Saturday night musings.....
How did I not know about Dawn? I'd always used Palmolive and then about 10 years ago, switched over to Method. I was forced to try Dawn - I use the 4x Platinum one - about three months into the pandemic when I couldn't get Method or Palmolive. Oh my God! It's fantastic! And the Powerwash is da bomb - you spray it on a burnt pan and it gets up everything quickly!

All this time, I've been missing out! I made up for lost time, though. While everyone else was hoarding toilet paper and paper towels, I was hoarding Dawn! I'm definitely a convert.

 

[billybudd]

I don't sweat my eggplant, either, unless it's really large and been in my fridge for awhile (which rarely happens). And since I only buy eggplant from a market stand vs. the grocery store, I don't worry too much about it being old. I just bought some Japanese eggplant today which I'll make tomorrow with some ginger and I have decided what else yet.

I think smoked trout would not be so great with that thing she made. Balsamic vinegar, reduced or not (and I love how she mixed up three or four different bottles of it! I'm joking......I didn't love it!) seems to me not a perfect ingredient with smoked trout. I'd put it on little toasts, like you mentioned, with some fennel fronds (which I would, of course, hack down from the garden with a chain saw, tantamount to what I saw Dana doing to those poor chives with her serrated knife!) and creme fraiche. Maybe some salmon roe, but not as much as she used. Might sound boring, but my tastebuds like to keep it simple with smoked trout, lox, etc. so I can actually taste the fish!

And I so agree with you @T Rex ! She is hilarious to watch!

Yeah, too much going on for me with the real delicacy that is smoked trout. Creme fraiche!!! Yaaas, queen! And fennel is the friend of all fish and shellfish. (I live in the desert and crab is a long lost dream. I mean they have it here but it's weeks old and $50 a pound or something. But I am a heathen and love my surimi "crab" salad with a hair of fennel.
(I remember days back east, blue crab salad with a drop of Pernod. I have to say that might be one of the top 20 eats.)
I thought Dana's eggplants looked enviably fresh before she incinerated them.

 

[Le Baiseur]

Aside from most of her food being unappetizing IMO (I keep it plant-based), I enjoy Dana's vlogs. I have a soft spot for worldly Israeli women - blame it on Shosh in Taipei who invited us into her Louis XIV filled living room and read our fortunes in cups after drinking Turkish coffee.

 

[M&MsMom]

Yeah, too much going on for me with the real delicacy that is smoked trout. Creme fraiche!!! Yaaas, queen! And fennel is the friend of all fish and shellfish. (I live in the desert and crab is a long lost dream. I mean they have it here but it's weeks old and $50 a pound or something. But I am a heathen and love my surimi "crab" salad with a hair of fennel.
(I remember days back east, blue crab salad with a drop of Pernod. I have to say that might be one of the top 20 eats.)

I am "back east"....unfortunately, I developed an allergy to shellfish about 5 years ago, out of the blue. Crab is what I miss the most, especially right now....and shrimp! Hell, I miss it all! I grew up on the Eastern Shore of Maryland but have lived smack in between Baltimore & Washington DC since I came here for college, so you know I've eaten some blue crab in my day! The allergy has forced me to eat and try other things I wouldn't have ever eaten, particularly when going out to dinner, because shellfish was always my go-to.

 

[T Rex]

Saturday night musings.....
How did I not know about Dawn? I'd always used Palmolive and then about 10 years ago, switched over to Method. I was forced to try Dawn - I use the 4x Platinum one - about three months into the pandemic when I couldn't get Method or Palmolive. Oh my God! It's fantastic! And the Powerwash is da bomb - you spray it on a burnt pan and it gets up everything quickly!

All this time, I've been missing out! I made up for lost time, though. While everyone else was hoarding toilet paper and paper towels, I was hoarding Dawn! I'm definitely a convert.

Without this thread turning into a dishwashing soap advert- LOL- I have always used Dawn. I tried Palmolive once, and while my hands felt lovely, it didn't do much for the dishes. I only use Method and Mrs. Myers on the sailboat for washing up (since the grey water from the galley sink goes overboard), but keep a bottle of Dawn Platinum aboard in the event of an emergency. LOL, I will not lie- I, too, stockpiled Dawn Platinum along with bog roll, paper towels, disinfecting wipes and paper towels during the pandemic, so your logic makes sense! When the Dawn Powerwash came out, I assumed it was a gimmick- "there is no way a spray soap is going to replace the boiling water and baking soda trick for my stainless All Clad cookware, nor the scrubby with Barkeeper's Friend", but was blown away! I am not certain the science or voodoo magic that goes into it, but it is amazing!

 

[suthern_lurker]

Saturday night musings.....
How did I not know about Dawn? I'd always used Palmolive and then about 10 years ago, switched over to Method. I was forced to try Dawn - I use the 4x Platinum one - about three months into the pandemic when I couldn't get Method or Palmolive. Oh my God! It's fantastic! And the Powerwash is da bomb - you spray it on a burnt pan and it gets up everything quickly!

All this time, I've been missing out! I made up for lost time, though. While everyone else was hoarding toilet paper and paper towels, I was hoarding Dawn! I'm definitely a convert.

I used lemon Joy for dishwashing for a long time and somehow over the years- I too started using Dawn- it’s also great for spot cleaning clothes. As we’ve had lots of baby clothes to wash that need pretreating to look presentable again. The spot cleaning sprays were getting rather costly- so I found a recipe for “oxi-clean”. Mix hydrogen peroxide, Dawn and a little water in a spray bottle.
*** (It was fun saying “I’m out of Joy or I need to get my Joy”)! Just being silly!

 

[M&MsMom]

I used lemon Joy for dishwashing for a long time and somehow over the years- I too started using Dawn- it’s also great for spot cleaning clothes. As we’ve had lots of baby clothes to wash that need pretreating to look presentable again. The spot cleaning sprays were getting rather costly- so I found a recipe for “oxi-clean”. Mix hydrogen peroxide, Dawn and a little water in a spray bottle.
*** (It was fun saying “I’m out of Joy or I need to get my Joy”)! Just being silly!

It is so funny, it's not like I didn't know Dawn existed, I just never really gravitated towards it. I truly feel like I've missed something my entire life! All my friends use it and laughed at me when I said "why didn't you tell me about Dawn?". It's like some great secret of womanhood or something!
I have heard about using Dawn as a pre-treat on clothing for years! I've always used hydrogen peroxide and sunlight on stubborn stains. I'm going to try this!

 

[KyBourbon]

Without this thread turning into a dishwashing soap advert- LOL- I have always used Dawn. I tried Palmolive once, and while my hands felt lovely, it didn't do much for the dishes. I only use Method and Mrs. Myers on the sailboat for washing up (since the grey water from the galley sink goes overboard), but keep a bottle of Dawn Platinum aboard in the event of an emergency. LOL, I will not lie- I, too, stockpiled Dawn Platinum along with bog roll, paper towels, disinfecting wipes and paper towels during the pandemic, so your logic makes sense! When the Dawn Powerwash came out, I assumed it was a gimmick- "there is no way a spray soap is going to replace the boiling water and baking soda trick for my stainless All Clad cookware, nor the scrubby with Barkeeper's Friend", but was blown away! I am not certain the science or voodoo magic that goes into it, but it is amazing!

If Dawn is good enough to clean oil off a duck, it’s good enough for me! (Maybe we should send a case to Fanny!)

 

[T Rex]

I used lemon Joy for dishwashing for a long time and somehow over the years- I too started using Dawn- it’s also great for spot cleaning clothes. As we’ve had lots of baby clothes to wash that need pretreating to look presentable again. The spot cleaning sprays were getting rather costly- so I found a recipe for “oxi-clean”. Mix hydrogen peroxide, Dawn and a little water in a spray bottle.
*** (It was fun saying “I’m out of Joy or I need to get my Joy”)! Just being silly!

LOL! Lemon Fresh Joy is actually phenomenal for your yard! One of my coworkers swore by a mixture of it and beer in a lawn sprayer attachment to treat your yard for cinch bugs- it works really well! (The lemon scent deters the bugs, the soap acts as a surfactant to coat the leaves, and the beer fertilizes the roots of the grass.) "When life gives you Lemon Fresh Joy, and a case of Natty Light (because your friends have questionable beer choices)"... you have the ingredients for a lush, green lawn!

 

[Frenchie0810]

Mexican street corn dee-up.. Joleen Sugarbaker Trailer park cooking


vs

Dana's gastronomical cooking



Which do you prefer?