The advice thread for random problems #6

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I 100% get what you mean. I am undiagnosed but suspected (hello 90s eldest daughter high achiever so couldn't possibly be autistic).

This has been a real struggle of mine for years, so I know how you feel
Not everyone who comes up in the suggested has been looking at your profile. Often there is something in common, like location or a page / group you have both interacted with. Someone who has died is always been suggested to me, although we have mutual friends.
 
Parents of teenagers especially those off to college in September (16-17yrs old) roughly how much pocket money are you giving your kids
my kid is currently on £25 a week is That enough or do I need to increase it? It’s just money to use towards food and drink when they go out with friends
mobile phone/clothes/ toiletries/hair stuff I pay for that
It depends on what you can afford - I’ve always given £150 a month and paid for extras - which is more than enough I think. Some friends get much less and some a lot more. If you can afford I prob would increase it a little bit to acknowledge that college is more expensive than school but not so much that they don’t see the benefit of a part time job! They’ll want to save for a holiday after 6th form for instance and I personally think it’s good for them to work for a contribution to that.
 
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Am I crazy to consider buying a little cottage in the woods and moving there?

It's basically got no modern amenities (well water, solar panel only electricity, wood stove for cooking and heating) but I just... yearn for the quiet and silent and I think either I tear apart how I currently live or it will tear me apart.
 
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Am I crazy to consider buying a little cottage in the woods and moving there?

It's basically got no modern amenities (well water, solar panel only electricity, wood stove for cooking and heating) but I just... yearn for the quiet and silent and I think either I tear apart how I currently live or it will tear me apart.
Not really crazy but I think it would take some determination to make it work, have you considered maybe doing a week at a little lodge that only offers this, I don't know where they all are but am sure there's some that offer a chance to switch off an they don't offer like WiFi, electricity etc, it could be a good way to test how you'd do an if you could do it full time
 
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Am I crazy to consider buying a little cottage in the woods and moving there?

It's basically got no modern amenities (well water, solar panel only electricity, wood stove for cooking and heating) but I just... yearn for the quiet and silent and I think either I tear apart how I currently live or it will tear me apart.
Not crazy. Well water or is it a bore hole? Both should be some of the best water you can get and it's free! You can get a little gas hob that works of gas cannisters or get proper propane gas which is kept outside but you use it like we use mains gas.
This is not so unusual for country living
If you feel comfortable share a photo of the cabin!
 
Am I crazy to consider buying a little cottage in the woods and moving there?

It's basically got no modern amenities (well water, solar panel only electricity, wood stove for cooking and heating) but I just... yearn for the quiet and silent and I think either I tear apart how I currently live or it will tear me apart.
This sounds like my dream. Just throw in a few rescue animals. Heaven. I think so many of us are yearning for this kind of peace in today's ever increasing insane world.
 
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Am I crazy to consider buying a little cottage in the woods and moving there?

It's basically got no modern amenities (well water, solar panel only electricity, wood stove for cooking and heating) but I just... yearn for the quiet and silent and I think either I tear apart how I currently live or it will tear me apart.

It doesn't sound crazy, but you need to be sure that you can handle solitude like that. I think it sounds dreamy, but I also know that I personally tend to fall into a weird state when I'm not getting any human interaction, so it's something I'd think about before doing it.
And also think about the practicalities of what you need for daily life like getting groceries - are you able to do that easily, wouldyou be able to do it when the weather isn't great or if you are ill, etc.
I don't think at all it's not doable and in fact it sounds like a very nice thing to do, but I'd try to think about it from all angles before committing to it.
 
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Has anyone applied for a 'medical driving licence', or reapplied for their driving licence after previously voluntary surrendering their driving licence for medical reasons and can tell me what to expect? I couldn't find anywhere to ask the question 😅.
 
It doesn't sound crazy, but you need to be sure that you can handle solitude like that. I think it sounds dreamy, but I also know that I personally tend to fall into a weird state when I'm not getting any human interaction, so it's something I'd think about before doing it.
And also think about the practicalities of what you need for daily life like getting groceries - are you able to do that easily, wouldyou be able to do it when the weather isn't great or if you are ill, etc.
I don't think at all it's not doable and in fact it sounds like a very nice thing to do, but I'd try to think about it from all angles before committing to it.
Well I'm coming into an inheritance soon so I'll be free to do a lot of things I wouldn't have been able to do earlier. It's been my dream to live a soft life for years, I despise the rat race we're all forced into.

I could easily afford the cabin plus any renovations that would be needed (depends on what I am allowed to do by the council). This cabin is ideal because its close to a small village while still conpletely removed from it. It's in the middle of the woods of which I would own 3000 m2.

I will have to talk to the owner how it is designated. If it had a forest designation only and the cottage is grandfathered in, I would be ok, but probably won't be allowed to connect to mains water and electricity or do big stuff to the existing structure.

Idk maybe I'm being delusional to even consider this. I'm just desperate for change and so so tired of continuing on a path that doesn't feel like mine, and hasn't for years.
 
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Has anyone taken period delay tablets?
I have a spa weekend on 25-28th, period could come anytime from 19-28th.

Can I get something to take for that and also cover my holiday on 15th-25th following month? Or will I literally be in agony with the delay 🤣

Worst case can I get two lots to cover both things? I did this over 20 years go but was doctor prescribed but now I can see boots/Superdrug offer it.

Need to order ASAP so I can take it in time so any advice appreciated!

Thank you 🙏🏻
 
Has anyone taken period delay tablets?
I have a spa weekend on 25-28th, period could come anytime from 19-28th.

Can I get something to take for that and also cover my holiday on 15th-25th following month? Or will I literally be in agony with the delay 🤣

Worst case can I get two lots to cover both things? I did this over 20 years go but was doctor prescribed but now I can see boots/Superdrug offer it.

Need to order ASAP so I can take it in time so any advice appreciated!

Thank you 🙏🏻
I used to take the pill, always worked for me, I'd start taking them two days before the date that I didn't want my period an it would stop it, then as soon as I come off them it usually started around two days later

However, side affect it does completely mess my patterns up an I could take my next periods early or late, I'd even take two a month at times out the blue
 
If you fill in an online consultation they give you options for how long etc.
ETA if you come off them on 28th after your spa weekend you’ll prob get your period over and done with before your holiday so won’t need to take them twice.
 
Thank you, have done it and waiting for them to come back to me!
Boys have all this SO easy!
 
Going to the hairdressers….. do you tip? If yes, how much?

I’ve never tipped before, partly as I’ve never found someone decent before, and partly as the prices are so expensive I begrudge having to pay extra. The current hairdresser I see is actually really great, first time in decades that I’ve gone back a second time, but when it came time to pay, and it’s £200 every 8 weeks, she hesitated at the card machine and I felt like it was expected. She didn’t say anything, and I’ve booked again, but now I fear that I’m being rude, what should I do?
 
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Going to the hairdressers….. do you tip? If yes, how much?

I’ve never tipped before, partly as I’ve never found someone decent before, and partly as the prices are so expensive I begrudge having to pay extra. The current hairdresser I see is actually really great, first time in decades that I’ve gone back a second time, but when it came time to pay, and it’s £200 every 8 weeks, she hesitated at the card machine and I felt like it was expected. She didn’t say anything, and I’ve booked again, but now I fear that I’m being rude, what should I do?
If the hairdresser doesn’t own the business I tip. I’ve had a have a hard time over the years with diff hairdressers. I get on so well with mine now & she works part of an independent salon. I do tip her.
 
Going to the hairdressers….. do you tip? If yes, how much?

I’ve never tipped before, partly as I’ve never found someone decent before, and partly as the prices are so expensive I begrudge having to pay extra. The current hairdresser I see is actually really great, first time in decades that I’ve gone back a second time, but when it came time to pay, and it’s £200 every 8 weeks, she hesitated at the card machine and I felt like it was expected. She didn’t say anything, and I’ve booked again, but now I fear that I’m being rude, what should I do?
I tip when I can. I don't think it should be expected. The UK is becoming to American in that tipping culture is now expected. Only do it if you want to do it.
 
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Hi tattlers

I hope there's somebody amongst us who can help me

I am wanting copies of interviews I had with the police around 2 years ago. Whether transcripts or audio, I'm not too fussed. It did result in court and I was convicted.

I've looked into doing an SAR request but that doesn't seem to include transcripts of interviews

I've been in touch with my solicitor whose assistant said she doubts they still have those kind of records but she'll look into it (I'm not hopeful)

I've put in a request for information with the area police force that dealt with the case. Again I'm not hopeful

Is there anything else I can be doing as from what I've read online I am fully entitled to this information and don't understand why it's so difficult to come by

Thanks tattlers
 
Hi tattlers

I hope there's somebody amongst us who can help me

I am wanting copies of interviews I had with the police around 2 years ago. Whether transcripts or audio, I'm not too fussed. It did result in court and I was convicted.

I've looked into doing an SAR request but that doesn't seem to include transcripts of interviews

I've been in touch with my solicitor whose assistant said she doubts they still have those kind of records but she'll look into it (I'm not hopeful)

I've put in a request for information with the area police force that dealt with the case. Again I'm not hopeful

Is there anything else I can be doing as from what I've read online I am fully entitled to this information and don't understand why it's so difficult to come by

Thanks tattlers
As far as I am aware you need to make the SAR request and that’s it.

I would’ve thought they need to keep the information but I don’t know the legalities of how long stuff like that should be kept
 
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Well I'm coming into an inheritance soon so I'll be free to do a lot of things I wouldn't have been able to do earlier. It's been my dream to live a soft life for years, I despise the rat race we're all forced into.

I could easily afford the cabin plus any renovations that would be needed (depends on what I am allowed to do by the council). This cabin is ideal because its close to a small village while still conpletely removed from it. It's in the middle of the woods of which I would own 3000 m2.

I will have to talk to the owner how it is designated. If it had a forest designation only and the cottage is grandfathered in, I would be ok, but probably won't be allowed to connect to mains water and electricity or do big stuff to the existing structure.

Idk maybe I'm being delusional to even consider this. I'm just desperate for change and so so tired of continuing on a path that doesn't feel like mine, and hasn't for years.

Oh, now i get it and I think it actually sounds verrry nice. Close to a village but not inside the village would be right up my alley as well. My personal concern would be about the utilities, especially water as otherwise you'll have to do a lot of water management for freshwater and also likely periodically get wastewater removed. It seems though someone has been living there already so maybe this part is known and taken care of.
Idk, I'd also think about it and I really don't think it's crazy. Especially if you are looking to change something from the regular rat race and also have the means to do it.
 
Going to the hairdressers….. do you tip? If yes, how much?

I’ve never tipped before, partly as I’ve never found someone decent before, and partly as the prices are so expensive I begrudge having to pay extra. The current hairdresser I see is actually really great, first time in decades that I’ve gone back a second time, but when it came time to pay, and it’s £200 every 8 weeks, she hesitated at the card machine and I felt like it was expected. She didn’t say anything, and I’ve booked again, but now I fear that I’m being rude, what should I do?
I always tip mine 10-15% because they are very very good and lovely to boot. £200 every 8 weeks is a lot though, I think I’d baulk at tipping when I was going that frequently, tbh.
 
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